Conversations About Sex

Summary: "The truth is…the real truth…is that men suck. Stupid boys and their stupid boy penises are nothing but trouble. I have decided to take a stand, although I am sure that the consequences will be dark and dangerous. Such is the life of a Grey, something that I would not wish on anybody. Just look at my late mother and I…"

Setting: Set after Cristina's wedding. Meredith has just returned from the honeymoon, and her relationship with Derek is over. This chapter begins with her at Joe's later in the evening.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

M&A∞

Chapter 00

Foreplay

(Meredith's POV)

"I'm drunk."

"I see."

She giggles girlishly, her perfectly manicured nails trailing over my knuckles playfully. I can practically feel my eyes glowing with mirth as I smile lazily at the gorgeous redhead in front of me. My head rests in the palm of my hand, cocked at just the right angle to catch the perfect way that the light brightens her rich blue irises. I reach out languidly, tucking a few stray strands of her fiery locks behind her ear. Her velvety tongue darts out, licking her lips anxiously. I smirk cockily as I drag my foot up her leg, the lengthy limb left bare with the high slit cut into the beautiful red dress.

"Red suits you." She smiles wonderingly at me as she leans further in. My eyes travel down briefly to the deep cut of the top where her breasts are on display.

"Everything suits you," she whispers seductively, her hand creeping slowly up my thigh.

I chuckle lightly, moving my hand to cup her cheek. I could never compare to this woman, my simple black suit seeming almost dowdy in comparison to her ravishing look. I move to sit up straight, completely focusing my attention on her. Both of my hands move to capture her forearms before trailing up to settle upon her slender shoulders. My smirk deepens as I feel her tremble beneath my fingertips.

My fingertips tighten as I pull her closer to me, bringing those lush pink lips closer to mine. Sky meets steel as our gazes lock firmly and our lips ghost over one another's. Distantly, I hear the distinct scraping of a chair being forced back before angry steps move quickly out the door. After a few moments, we separate, laughing hysterically. We draw quite a few stares, but neither of us cares in the least. I signal Joe to get us another round before focusing my attention back on my companion…

"I am so screwed on surgeries now, you know. He is going to make it a point to keep me from them just to spite me," I offer uninterestedly. She smiles at me sadly in return.

"I know, unfortunately, and I apologize. I can make it up to you, if you want." I quirk a blonde eyebrow, my curiosity piqued.

"And how might you do that, lover?" I ask curiously. She snorts into her glass of wine. Red, just like her hair…

"That was just too damn funny, Grey. The way he…anyway…I could let you in on my surgeries, if you would like. I know that you are a budding neuro-goddess, but I would love the help. Besides, Stevens is going through her…whatever the hell she is going through, so I could definitely use you. Plus, I kind of like having you around, lover." We both snicker quietly to ourselves.

"You just have a thing for making friendly with the wrong people, you know that? First Mark, and now you are willingly spending time with me. I am a hard habit to kick, Addie." She places a warm hand on my leg, cocking her head to the side while offering me a warm smile…

"I can see that. Derek is probably going to file charges against me," she says offhandedly. I reach out and stroke the side of her face affectionately.

"I will bail you out," I toss jokingly. She laughs heartily, her entire body quaking with mirth. I shake my head as I absently play with a few strands of her hair.

"You know, you really are not that bad, though, Grey. I mean, you are several kinds of fucked up, but that is far from your fault. Your mother and father should not have been allowed to procreate…or even associate with any other human beings, for that matter. Regardless, I have seen the brighter side of you, and it is beautiful. Mark, now he is bad company to keep." I smirk at that.

"You…are too right about that. You know he almost got me to sleep with him once." It is her turn to raise a delicate brow…

"Do tell," she whispers softly…dangerously. I nod as I lean in closer to her.

"Well…"

∞M&A∞

I sigh to myself, tired of the day's events. Not only have I been forced to try on several hideous gowns for Cristina's wedding, but I have had to deal with Derek griping about our relationship. In all honesty, he is valid in his complaints. However, he knew how damaged I was when we started this thing, whatever it is. I know that I should just do the right thing and leave him, but it is much harder than it seems. I am in love with him, and that is what keeps me here with him. One day, I hope to not be stuck dealing with these stupid feelings. Stupid feelings and stupid boy penises…

"Now, now, Grey, that is not the way to talk about a man's penis. Penises are not stupid…just the owners of them." I whirl around, staring into the clear blue eyes of one Mark Sloan. I smirk at him…

"That is probably the smartest and cleanest thing that I have ever heard you say, Mark. Since when did you become so introspective?" He snorts.

"Since I decided to reject my smarminess and act like an adult for a bit." I look at him for a moment, choosing my words carefully…

"In other words, you are about two seconds from breaking because Addison just might leave here, taking your chances at redemption right along with her," I offer quietly, sadly. He looks away, eyes swimming with unshed tears.

"We truly are the dirty mistresses, huh…" he mutters distantly. I nod slowly, an ironic smirk hanging on my lips.

"That we are," I say as I push off the wall, deciding it best to flee the scene. I am really not in the right place to deal with feelings right now, especially the more volatile emotions of the McSteamy…

Unfortunately, I do not move fast enough.

"Mark!" I yelp as he grabs my arm, pulling me down the hall. His steps are focused, determined as I have never seen before. This is going to be bad…very bad…

"I am Mark Sloan, and I do not do this. I am not the type of guy who lets feelings complicate things. I am not doing this, and you are not letting me, Meredith!" I swallow, the dark conviction emanating from him frightening the shit out of me.

"I never get a say in things…" I mumble bitterly. He simply smirks arrogantly before dragging my slouching form into the nearest on-call room.

Once inside, I find myself flung rather unceremoniously onto the bottom bunk. My companion does not miss a beat as he begins undressing himself. Now, I have never seen Mark naked, but I have heard how the nurses compliment rather bitterly his physique. I cannot help but admit that he is truly well-deserving of the McSteamy title. He is sculpted like a Greek god, all muscle and strength and large penis…very large penis. I mentally curse and damn myself for temporarily lapsing into dirty lust. I cannot do this, and neither can he.

I make the stupid mistake of standing up, intent on telling him that we should stop. He, however, takes it as a chance to kiss me soundly. My eyes widen, but only for a moment. His kiss is…yea. My mind completely shuts down, his lips sending shivers up and down my spine. The electricity is unlike anything that I have ever felt, shooting jolts of pleasure throughout my entire body. I close my eyes for a moment, basking in the glow for just a moment before deciding to shatter the moment. If I am honest, I can see exactly why Addison fell to Mark's temptation. He has a passion that Derek could never have…

"Mark, stop. Now." He leans back to stare questioningly into my eyes.

"Seriously?" I nod curtly.

"Seriously. You do not want nor need to do this. It is simply your dark and twistiness kicking in. Stop it."

He crosses his arms across his broad chest, the muscles in his jaws clenching tightly as he glares at me. I lean idly against the railing behind me, toying lightly with my nails. After only a few moments, he sighs, drawing a smirk onto my face. If there is one thing that I know, it is darkness. Being with Derek has broken me to the point of no return, blocking out any and all hopes for sunshine and brightness. Mark is just like me, my other half. As such, I know exactly how to handle him. He will be pissed for a week or so, but he will get over it.

"Whatever. Just know that when you come begging for it, I will have an 'I-told-you-so' ready and waiting." I snort humorlessly.

"Bye, Mark."

∞M&A∞

"Wow." I chuckle at Addie's reaction before downing another tequila shot.

"Trust me, it was hard…very hard." She giggles knowingly at that.

"Oh, I know. I also know that I would not have had the willpower to deny him. A naked Mark is a dangerous Mark, especially a broken and determined one." I laugh quietly.

"And determined he was…" I mutter distantly. She looks at me oddly.

"Meredith?"

I rest my head upon my palm again, staring intensely at the beauty before me. I reach out and slowly trail my finger along her forearm just as I did before, only this time, there is no agenda. She smiles at me genuinely, her eyes warm and welcoming. After watching Cristina's life unravel, I decided that it was time to grow up and move on. Addison and I were both victims of the Shepherd charm, regardless of how everything seemed at first. The past should be just that, the past. I have since decided to start over with everyone, Addie included.

"Come home with me," I offer calmly. She looks at me with wide eyes at first, her surprise evident. Eventually, she begins to smile, nodding slowly.

"Okay," she says after a while. I smile brightly as she takes my hand and pulls me to my feet. I toss Joe a few bills before being tugged out the door.

∞M&A∞

(Addison's POV)

"You know, Mer, I never took you as a pink bowtie type of girl."

"I'm not. Your ex-husband is…was…whatever."

"Why am I not surprised…"

I lie back, basking in the warmth that her simple down comforter, the scent of lavender wafting around me. Sighing quietly in contentment, I roll over onto my side, staring into the closet opposite me. The young blond is rummaging around through random piles of clothing to find something comfortable to wear…all the while in nothing but her bra and panties. Regardless of the fact that my mother is a newfound lesbian, I have never really had these types of feelings or desires for another woman before. Seriously. There is just something about Meredith, though, something different…unique…that sets her apart from all of the rest…

"A man," I mutter quietly, although not quietly enough.

"Did you just call me a man, Addison Montgomery?!" she asks between astonished giggles. I blush furiously, burying my face in one of her pillows…

Big mistake.

"No," comes my muffled reply. I sigh before lifting my face to meet her curious gaze.

I almost jump out of my skin when I notice that she is right in front of me.

"How in the hell did you…nevermind. No, Meredith, I was not calling you a man. I was just trying to think of the right way to describe your sexuality, if that makes sense." She cocks her head to the side, an adorable action that makes me smile a little.

A lot.

"I guess I've never really thought about it much, really. Derek did say once that I fuck around like a man. Of course, that was when he was calling me a whore like Alex. Still, though, I think he was right. I do think about sex much like a man would. That's why Mark and I get along so famously." I nod, absorbing each and every word that she speaks.

Ever since I have known her, Meredith has always had someone in her bed, be it Derek or a one-night stand. I have, along with everyone else, watched as she has tossed men around much like said gender would do any other woman. It hasn't given her the best of reputations, but it has definitely inspired intrigue among her fellow females. Derek is a special case. He just happened to be the one man to capture her heart…

"I was in a threesome with Derek once," I blurt out rather suddenly, shocking the both of us with the admission. She leans back, a golden eyebrow quirked in amusement.

"Another girl?" she asks. I shake my head.

"Another guy. This goes nowhere, Grey!" I warn. Even so, I can imagine the jackass pissing her off enough to where she throws it up in his face. I chuckle quietly at the image.

"Spill it, Red," she quips, laying down beside me. It takes me a moment to focus, her lack of outerwear starting to affect me.

"Well…"

∞M&A∞

I pinch the bridge of my nose in exasperation, barely suppressing the massive headache that is threatening to shatter my skull. All that I can think of is how I brought this all on myself. I just had to suggest that we spice up our relationship…that we fight for this to work. I had read somewhere that couples would sometimes begin to have trouble when their relationship grew stagnant. Things have become rather routine as of late, so I figured 'what the hell'. Never again…

"You know, Derek, we don't have to do this," I offer kindly. He just continues to look at me, confused determination swimming in those bright blue eyes. There is no backing out now…

"He's here," he says quietly before moving swiftly for the door. I take a few deep breaths before looking up and throwing on a bright smile for our guest.

He walks in, blond-haired and blue-eyed. He is very attractive, almost painfully so, which shocks me. I glance over at my husband, but he refuses to meet my gaze. Something is off about the situation, but I don't say anything. I decide to keep my suspicions to myself for once, and turn back towards our soon-to-be bedroom playmate…

"Addison," I say, offering him my hand. He takes it gently, cradling it in his smooth palm. I quirk a fiery eyebrow.

"Nice to meet you. You are all that he said and SO much more," he whispers seductively. I stare at him dumbly for a second, something about the way that he said it churning my stomach a bit. I quickly recover, a wavering smile gracing my lips.

"Let's just take this to the bedroom," Derek squeaks suddenly, startling us both. He shrugs indifferently before trailing off behind the brooding brunette. I stare after them a moment before sighing and moving in the same direction.

Derek is the first to slide in bed, pressing his back firmly against the headboard. The beautiful blond stands to the side, watching me like a hawk. I ignore him for the moment, moving to take my usual place beside my husband. For a moment, I will our visitor away, wishing we could just go back to the way we were. Before Mark, before Seattle, Before Meredith…

That last one causes a hitch in my breath.

Staring up at the golden-haired male standing at the end of the bed, I imagine the young intern in his place. Although her eyes are much paler, much more…distant, if you will, the two really are similar. My eyes follow him as he smirks, just like she would, and crawls up between us. I am oddly transfixed, images of Meredith melding with the young man before me. I run my hands curiously up his back, my perfectly-manicured nails finding purchase in his shoulder-length locks. He gasps deliciously.

"Hot, Red," he says quietly, drawing a long stroke up my thigh. I shiver as his face becomes something much more feminine…more like hers…

"Come 'ere," Derek says suddenly, pulling him towards him tenderly. My eyes widen when their lips lock passionately. It is then that I realize two things…

One: Derek is not over Meredith.

And two: neither am I…

I close my eyes as I move forward, letting the world fall away around me as I drown myself in the sensation of the two before me…

M&A∞

"So, I really am the elephant in the room, huh…" she muses quietly, her grey eyes unfocused. I drag a lazy finger along her bare thigh. At least she finally put on a shirt…

"More like the ghost, if I am honest. You were just…always there." She nods slowly, her eyes meeting mine curiously.

"You were thinking dirty thoughts about me, Addison Montgomery. That is something I would expect from those two, not you. Bad Red," she says softly, chuckling lightly. I can't help but smile at that.

"Whatever, Grey," I say before pinching her thigh. She smirks.

"So, did he…you know," she asks calmly, making obscene gestures with her fingers. I laugh out loud.

"I am not telling you. He is bound to say something stupid to you one day, and I will not be held responsible for anything that you decide to say to him." She laughs darkly at that.

We lay beside each other for a moment, exchanging small touches here and there. There's an odd sort of intimate charm in the air, yet neither of us seems to mind. Dredging up the memory of that night with the Meredith lookalike has definitely begun to put some things into perspective. I no longer see her as the reminder of my past failures. Instead, I see her as an inspiration for my future, carefree and able to face the world one day at a time.

"You're thinking about me again," she whispers seductively as she draws her body nearer to mine. I smirk slyly.

"What if I am?" I tease lightly as I stroke the side of her face tenderly. I sigh contentedly as she returns the gesture.

"Well, Addie, I might just have to entertain those thoughts of yours." I am surprised to find just how not bothered by that statement I am. As a matter of fact, I desire quite intensely for her to do just that…

"Entertain away," is all I say as she slides on top of me.

The last thing that I see before I close my eyes are her lips descending towards mine…

M&A∞

I really hope that you guys enjoy this! I plan on updating soon, so stay tuned. All reviews are welcome and very much appreciated. Love you guys, and see you next chapter