[A/N]
Honestly, I have no idea where this came from… I'm currently watching the Dressrosa Arc and Sabo just started fighting in the Colosseum and a day later I listened to 'Fix you' by Coldplay and this happened somehow. -.-" So, while reading please keep in mind even though I have an idea what's about to happen (it's impossible to avoid spoilers :D) I haven't actually watched all the available episodes nor am I up to date regarding the manga. Apart from that I hope you like it! :)
Warnings: May contain spoilers for people who have absolutely no idea what's about to happen after Sabo started fighting in the Colosseum, I guess, just to be safe.
Disclaimer: The lyrics are not my own, of course, but are part of the song 'Fix you' by Coldplay and I don't own One Piece either, obviously.
[Fix you]
Big hazel eyes focused on him as the younger took a step forward, scarred cheek heavily bruised, blood running from his brow and forcing him to blink to keep it from blurring his vision, the gathering tears would do the job soon enough anyways. Luffy had just returned from his battle against Doflamingo victoriously, his body was battered and exhausted but he had wanted to see Sabo so badly, the need to talk to his older brother almost painful.
So he had hurried through the rubble of the castle and the alleys of the town towards where the others had told him Sabo was, his legs close to giving way underneath him but he urged them forward with the same determination he forced his body and mind to stay awake and not give in to the tiredness pressing in on them. Finally, he had found Sabo, talking to Koala and Robin in between the debris of what used to be the Toy House and as if the older had sensed his younger brother approaching, he had turned around, genuine smile on his scarred face and he had stepped away from the two women and opened his arms in a welcoming gesture, spreading them wide for Luffy to throw himself into their soothing embrace.
And that was exactly what the raven haired did. Leaping forward, throwing his arms around Sabo's neck, no longer holding back the tears burning in his eyes and a heart-wrenching sob left his mouth. Eagerly, the blond closed his arms around the smaller body, pulling him close, holding him tightly like he had wanted to do a million times since regaining his memories.
"I-I missed you so-…so much," Luffy cried in between sobs, words interrupted by his chocked breathing and Sabo pulled him even closer, bringing one gloved hand up to the back of the younger's head to press their cheeks together, feeling the wetness from Luffy's tears running down his own skin.
"I missed you too," he breathed, barely holding back his own tears. It had been so long and even though he hadn't remembered his brothers' existence for many years, the moment his memories had returned he had felt the pain of being separated from them for so long all at once, it had crashed down on him together with the certain devastating knowledge of never being able to see his eldest brother, his earliest friend, the boy who he had first shared his dreams of freedom with, ever again and it had simply been too much to bare. The devastation over Ace's loss had ripped him apart and he was sure for one moment his heart had actually stopped beating, refusing to go on with so many emotions wrecking the blond's body, the realisation too overwhelming, too intense—he had regained his memories, the images had flooded him, put themselves back into the vacant spaces in his head and suddenly painted a vivid picture of three boys racing throw a lush forest, hunting and sparing and laughing and dreaming together. His breath had caught in his throat, his legs had refused to carry him any longer and with a gut-wrenching cry of agony he had lost conscience.
But all that didn't matter anymore because Luffy, the little crybaby, was in his arms; crying. So he took a few more steps away from the others who looked at them curiously or in the case of Robin and Koala with a gentle smile on their faces and maneuvered them behind a big piece of debris, hiding them from prying eyes. He leaned back against the rough surface and slid down, coming to rest on the rubble covered ground, Luffy still in his arms, sitting in his lap and his tear streaked face hidden in Sabo's blond curls but he could tell that he already started to calm down again, sobs turning into hiccups and sniffling every once in a while.
Sabo soothingly stroked the younger's messy hair, taking in the feeling of Luffy's vibrantly beating heart resonating through his own body, closing his eyes.
When you try your best but you don't succeed.
The worst part about going through the footage of Marineford had been watching Luffy trying so hard to save their brother, risking his life again and again and again only to see all his efforts shattered in an instant right before his eyes, being protected by the one he came to protect. The irony of it was so cruel, so unfair that whenever Sabo thought of it his mouth went dry and his whole body started trembling with guilt and anger—at the world, the Marines, that damned Akainu and sometimes even Ace. Yes, even Ace.
He felt bad for it, he hated that part of himself which secretly longed to punch his brother in the face for what he had done to both of them, giving his own life in exchange for Luffy's, saving the younger by sacrificing himself—was there any crueler way to part with a loved one?
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
The expression which had distorted the younger's face after Ace had slipped out of his grip, falling to the ground motionlessly, it had burned itself into Sabo's inner eye and had been the cause for sleepless nights and many a nightmare.
He knew what he had felt like when the realisation had sunk in, so he could only imagine what it must have been like for Luffy, holding their freckled brother in his arms, feeling the life seeping out of him, listening to his final words and with every uttered sentence the eldest's body had become weaker, his breathing shallower until his heart had made a last soft thud before it had stopped beating forever.
When the thought crossed his mind, his lips drew inward, pressing together to not give away a sob, tears pricking his eyes again, threatening to spill over and rolling down the wet paths Luffy's had left earlier.
But the raven seemed to sense his unease nonetheless and turned his head a bit to whisper in his ear. "I'm so glad you're still here, Sabo. When-…when Ace died I felt so alone." He hiccuped. "Jinbe reminded me of my nakama and I-I knew I wasn't, I knew but…something was still missing…"
And high above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go.
"I know," the blond whispered, not trusting his voice to not crack with the lump forming in his throat, "When I remembered you and Ace and realised that he had died it felt as if a part of me had died as well."
Sabo could hear Luffy sniffle again before the younger pulled away a little, looking at him with red rimmed swollen eyes, his face a mess with all the bruises, the dried blood and fresh tear streaks and the expression in those big hazel eyes was almost desperate causing Sabo's hand to tighten its grip on Luffy's torn shirt, the pain over Ace's loss probably clearly visible in his own eyes.
"I still feel as if a part of me is missing…" Luffy whispered and suddenly lowered his gaze as if he was ashamed that after all this time he still wasn't over it—that he still longed for their eldest brother's embrace, the affectionate ruffling of his hair or the scolding when he was being an idiot and a pain the ass again.
And even through the veil of dark strands hiding his eyes a bit Sabo could see tears on the corner of Luffy's eyes again.
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
Tears stream down your face
And I
"I feel the same," Sabo admitted, leaning his head back against the cold surface of the rock behind him, "But after a while I started telling myself that it's alright and that Ace has probably taken a part of us with him, something to keep him company, to remind him of us while he waits for us up there…to make sure we'll find him once it's our turn and then he'll return it and we'll feel complete again because we're back together."
The words simply spilled out of him but he knew that was what Luffy needed to hear, he needed reassurance that it was okay to still ache even though it had been two years and that he would probably hurt a little whenever he thought of the older raven but really, it was alright. The wounds caused by the death of a loved one were deep and took a long time to heal and even then they left scars—scars which would prickle and tingle and remind one of one's loss but wasn't it also an indication of how much you had loved that lost person?
And wouldn't that tingle be pleasant at some point when the sting turned into a soft, dull ache which accompanied every memory, a sign of how much Luffy and Sabo longed to have their brother back at their side again, running wild with them, being free and they would do so again, eventually. They would.
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.
Luffy looked up again and their eyes met.
"You think so?" he asked and Sabo nodded, belief strong in his blue eyes. A smile tugged at Luffy's lips and he leaned forward, resting his forehead against Sabo's. They both closed their eyes again, relishing the fact that they still had a brother with them here in this life, that they weren't the last one left of their brotherhood—their shared bond.
"And until then we simply have to live life with no regrets and make him proud," the blond said.
"I will," Luffy promised, "I will become Pirate King, I will be free and I'll always know that even though he's not with me, part of him still is because we kept it with us here as well and it makes us stronger and keeps us going. We won't break our promise."
They looked at each other again, smiles on their faces and Sabo was relieved that after all this time of blaming himself for not having been able to be there to try and save Ace, leaving Luffy alone with his grief, at least now he had been given the chance to console his little brother a bit, had been able to give him more strength and the knowledge that he wasn't alone, that from now on Sabo was by his side until the day the three of them would be reunited again.
Suddenly, Luffy leaped to his feet, thrusting his arms in the air, taking a deep breath and facing the starry sky before shouting at the top of his lungs.
"Watch us, Ace!"
And Sabo chuckled lightly and turned his gaze upwards as well and thought, Until we meet again!
Reviews are very much appreciated! :)
Danke!