I don't know about y'all, but I've struggled for a long time with how Rayna could have ended up at the cabin with Deacon the night he asked her to marry him, and I can't get it out of my head. I've written that scenario a couple times, but it never felt right, so this is my last attempt at writing what got them there, to that place, to that time, that started everything that threw their lives into disarray at the end of season 1. Let me know if you like it.
Watty White looked up when the door opened to the studio. His eyes lit up and the frown he'd had on his face melted away. "Hey, there," he said, as Rayna Jaymes walked in. She smiled and he thought back to when he'd first met her. He'd kept an eye on Rayna and her sister, Tandy, from afar, since the day their mother had died. He'd been at the Bluebird when Rayna came in one night, looking nervous and shaky, and signed in for the open mic.
When she got up on the stage, in her denim skirt and t-shirt, with a checked bandana around her neck and well-worn cowboy boots on her feet, he wondered if Lamar knew she was there. He knew she was young, just barely sixteen, and he was anxious to see how she'd do. He'd been at many other small clubs and listening rooms at other open mics, listening to all the new talent, but he was especially interested in Rayna. Virginia had told him, long ago, that Rayna wanted to be a country music star and she had asked Watty if, when the time was right, he would watch out for her. He'd done that, for sure, but he hadn't always been sure he'd done right by her.
This was her first time at the Bluebird and he'd known she would be extra nervous. Every time he'd heard her, he thought she had an extraordinary voice and a nice, but immature, way with words. She needed a guitar player, though, as that was clearly not her strength, and she needed better songs. But she was as pretty as a picture and she had a dazzling smile that lit up her face. He knew that the guys in the audience were falling in love with her and the women wanted to be her. She was both wholesome and sexy, a killer combination, especially in one so young.
That was the night he'd finally introduced himself to her and told her he could help her be a star. Even now, he still felt conflicted, because although he knew he'd delivered on that promise to her, he'd also been responsible for introducing her to someone who could so easily have derailed her for good. But fortunately she was strong, stronger than she would have appeared at first glance, and she'd persevered.
She'd gone from a shy, scared teenager, unsure of her talent, but following her dream anyway, to the country music superstar she was becoming. She'd already had her first platinum album and a CMA and she was opening for some of the biggest names in country music, while headlining at smaller venues. Watty was sure her next tour would be her first arena headlining tour. This latest album was going to put her over the top.
She walked over now and hugged him. "Hey, Watty," she said warmly.
He smiled at her fondly. "Glad to have you here, my little songbird," he said. He gestured towards the chair opposite him. "Have a seat."
They both sat down at the studio console and slid on their headphones. He slid up the volume knob and watched her as the first single from her new album finished. He thought her eyes took on a sad note for a second, but then she took a deep breath and put on one of her dazzling smiles as she looked across at him.
Let me, let me let go, baby, won't you / Let me let go / It just isn't right / I've been two thousand miles / Down a dead-end road
Oh, let me let go, darlin', won't you / I just gotta know / If this is for the best / Why are you still in my heart / Yeah, you're still in my soul, let me let go / Let me let go, let me let go
As the notes faded at the end, Watty leaned into the microphone. "That's the first single off the upcoming album by Rayna Jaymes, who just happens to be in studio with me this morning," he said, his voice smooth. "Welcome, Rayna."
She leaned into her mic and smiled. "Thanks for having me, Watty. It's always great to be at WSM."
"So tell us about your new album, Rayna."
"I'm really so proud of it. I took my time selecting the songs and found some really great music that's being written all over Nashville. And I was just honored to be able to record a lot of that great music for this record."
"You wrote a few of the songs, too, didn't you?"
Rayna swallowed hard. "I did. There are three that I wrote completely on my own."
Watty smiled at her kindly. He knew this album was important to her, since it was her first without any songs co-written with Deacon Claybourne and without his participation at all. When she'd broken things off with him almost six months earlier, she'd reworked the track list to take off the four songs the two long-time partners – personal as well as professional – had already written together for the album. She'd also had to find a new lead guitar player, something that had postponed the start of recording. He could see the pain still in her eyes and the sadness in her face. "When's the album due out in stores?" he asked.
"Early October."
"And you're touring to support it?"
"Yes. I'll be going out with Garth Brooks starting in September."
"Very exciting."
Rayna smiled shyly. "Yes, it is." She bit her lip lightly. "I'm really excited about everything going forward. There have been some big changes in my life this year and my new record is all about that."
Watty smiled back at her. "I see really big things for you, Rayna. And we'll all be looking forward to what's next."
They chatted a little while longer, about the album, about her plans. Watty was proud of what she'd done with her career. Especially given all the turmoil in her life. There were times he'd regretted introducing her to Deacon Claybourne. While it was true that Deacon had given her songwriting polish and he'd been a great sideman for her, he'd also tested her spirit, her resolve, and her loyalty. While Watty couldn't deny that the two loved each other deeply, Deacon's alcoholism had nearly destroyed her. He'd been relieved when he'd first listened to the tracks for her newest album. She'd written several songs about the break-up, but she'd taken the opportunity to find great songs from other songwriters, that helped her not make the album totally about the pain in her life.
One of the things that had always been true about Rayna, no matter how dark it got, was that she was a true phoenix, rising from the rubble. Regardless of the pain Deacon dragged her through, she never lost her professionalism. She would push all of that deep down inside and still go out and give a great performance or a killer interview. Her smile never faded when she was onstage or in front of a crowd. He was sure there were private tears, but her public persona never wavered.
Watty's show was winding down and he decided to finish it with one of Rayna's earlier hits. "Thank you so much, Rayna, for joining me today. We're going to sign off today with one of Rayna's biggest hits." As the opening notes for 'It's My Life' filled the studio, Watty and Rayna both took off their headphones and got up from their chairs. Watty followed Rayna out of the studio and out into the hallway.
She turned back to him and smiled. "Thanks," she said softly.
He knew it was as much for the fact that he didn't play one of the many songs she'd written with Deacon as it was for just having her on the air. While it was impossible to completely erase Deacon's influence – her biggest hits to date had been songs co-written with him – it was clear she was moving on. He smiled at her. "The new album is really outstanding, Rayna," he said. "I think Randy really brings out the best in you."
"Thanks for introducing him to me," she said. "I really needed to shake things up."
She looked like she wanted to say more, but was hesitant. "Is there something else, Rayna?" he asked gently.
She bit her lip and looked away, then looked back. "Have you seen Deacon lately? Is he okay?" she asked, her voice small.
Watty breathed in. He'd hoped she'd stopped thinking about him, that firing him from her band and recording an album without him meant she'd put him behind her. I should have known better. I don't know if she'll ever completely be able to wash her hands of him. He knew she was seeing someone new, that it was fairly serious, and he'd been glad to hear it. He thought about not telling her the truth, but she could find it out easily enough if she wanted. "He's actually doing pretty well," he told her. "I know he's been going to meetings, trying to stay on track."
Rayna's eyes widened. "Really? He's sober?" she asked.
Watty nodded. "Seems to be. For now." He looked at her carefully. "I don't have to tell you, though, that all that could change. I know he wants to be better, but he's always struggled, as you know." He usually steered clear of giving her advice, particularly on the personal side, but he knew she was fragile where Deacon was concerned and, considering his own history with her mother, he knew her feelings ran strong and deep, and probably always would.
Rayna nodded. "I know. I hope maybe this is a sign that he's going to make it work, though," she said, a hopeful look on her face. "That he's working on it on his own." She looked at him questioningly. "Is he playing music these days?"
"Yeah, he is. Here and there, around town. A lot of your old songs, but he's been working on new stuff too." He smiled sadly. "He's still a really talented songwriter."
She nodded. "Well, listen, I need to get going." She reached in and hugged her mentor. "Thanks again, Watty. I always appreciate coming on with you."
"Anytime, my little songbird. You know that." He watched her as she walked out of the radio station, wondering about why she'd asked about Deacon after all these months. She had seemed to move on, seemed to be in a good place, with her new boyfriend and a new life. But she had never really talked to him about the specifics of what had happened to lead her to the final break with Deacon after all those years. Rayna was a very private person, never more so than with respect to her relationships. He worried, though, that enough time had passed that she felt she could handle Deacon again. That would just lead to pain and heartache, he was sure, and he hoped she was prepared.
As she drove from the Opryland Hotel back across the river, Rayna thought about what Watty had said about Deacon. She hadn't seen him in months. It hadn't stopped her from thinking about him, but time apart had softened her anger. When she'd broken up with him six months earlier it hadn't been the first time, but it had been the one that stuck. He'd made it easy for her to do, falling off the wagon yet again, after she'd put him through rehab for the third time. While she'd supported him as she'd always done, she'd also told him this was his last chance with her. That if he couldn't make it work, she was done for good.
The night he'd failed to show up for a show because he was passed out in a bar was the last straw. The next day, when he came home, everything she'd owned was gone from the house. He'd then proceeded to destroy almost everything else that was left in it. When he'd tracked her down at Sound Check, he'd alternately begged and argued with her to give them another chance, to not let him go. But she'd stood firm, telling him that it was over and, not only that, but he was fired from her band. She was cutting all ties. He'd raged at her over that, but eventually he'd left, and she'd collapsed in tears. It had been the hardest thing she'd ever done.
That was when she'd finally given in and let Tandy fix her up with the handsome young man she'd met at a business meeting. Teddy Conrad was probably as different from Deacon Claybourne as anyone could have been. He was smart, charming, polite, and clean cut. He didn't know the first thing about the music business, but he seemed to enjoy listening to her talk about it and he stood on the side stage at her shows whenever he could. He was kind and attentive, but most importantly, he could hold his liquor. He never got drunk. He'd told her that his father was an alcoholic and that was why he never had more than two drinks. She admired that about him, his self-discipline. It was ironic that Deacon's life mirrored Teddy's, with the alcoholic father, but Deacon had none of that self-discipline.
She smiled a little as she thought about Teddy. He'd told her he loved her and she'd said it back, although she thought she'd probably said it mostly because he had. She knew she didn't feel the all-consuming passion she'd felt with Deacon. She never longed for Teddy's touch on her skin or his lips on hers. Sex with Teddy was unimaginative, although he was certainly gentle and attentive, as he was in so many other ways.
Things had been really nice with Teddy, though, and she was enjoying the relationship. She liked being picked up for dates and having chairs pulled out for her and doors opened. She enjoyed their casual chatter over dinner or holding hands during a movie. The last time she'd been on a real date had been to the homecoming dance her sophomore year in high school, but that had ended with her having to call her father to come pick her up because her date went off with someone else. She and Deacon had never 'dated', not like this, anyway.
Things with Deacon had started with him playing guitar for her and then helping her with her songwriting. She'd fallen in love practically at first sight and it hadn't been long after that before he kissed her. He'd taken her in when her father had kicked her out of the house and there had been no pretense that he was just being a friend. She'd lost her virginity to him that very first night and there had been no looking back. There had been no courtship, like there had been with Teddy. They were both all in from the beginning. And instead of things leveling off, it felt like a jet airliner barreling down the runway all the time. It was hot and all-consuming and intense and wonderful. Until it wasn't.
She shook the thoughts of Deacon away. That was the past and she was moving forward with her future. She'd been visiting radio stations all morning, talking about her new album on all the country morning shows. She was exhausted and ready to settle down in her apartment with a cup of tea and a book. She had rehearsal that afternoon, for the upcoming tour, and she had a new lead guitar player she needed to break in. That had been one of the hardest parts of breaking up with Deacon. He was an amazing guitar player and replacing him had been tough. She really hoped this new guy was the right guy. She needed someone she could count on.
She stood in her kitchen as she heated the water for her tea. When she'd left Deacon, she'd stayed with Tandy for a few weeks until she'd found this apartment. It was a small one-bedroom place in the Green Hills area. It was quiet and her apartment faced a courtyard. She had a small balcony with a table and two chairs and she took her tea with her as she sat outside. Even though it was a hot early August day, the courtyard was shaded and there was a light breeze and it was comfortable.
The morning had been busy, but exciting. It was always exciting to drop a new album. After her debut album had gone platinum, the next two had gone gold. Her label head kept telling her she was one of those "sure shots", and that pleased her. She was proud of this album, maybe more so than any of the other three. This one was totally on her. There was no Deacon propping her up with great songs or stellar instrumental arrangements. It had felt strange to be in the studio without him, even as she felt the relief of not having to worry about him.
She'd only written three songs. She knew she wasn't the strongest songwriter. That was what Deacon had been for. He made her better. But it was important to her to stand on her own and so she'd agonized over the lyrics and even more over the music. Randy, her new producer, had found someone to help beef up the musical aspects, and had also introduced her to songwriters that had amazing music to perform.
The three songs she'd written were going to be the first released singles. 'Let Me Let Go', the song each of the radio stations had previewed, was being released in two weeks. Then they would release 'This Love Ain't Big Enough' and 'The Best Songs Come From Broken Hearts' later. She was proud of what she'd written and it had felt cathartic and healing as she'd done so. But now, as it got closer to the album release date and her next tour, she felt at loose ends. It had been a hard six months and she still found herself, at odd moments, thinking about Deacon and missing him.
In spite of that, there still was a lot of peace in her life these days. It had been a very long time since there'd really been peace for her. The best times had been, after those early years when she and Deacon were starting out and driving all over the southeast playing everywhere they could, the weeks and months just after Deacon would get out of rehab. The weeks and months when he worked hard at staying sober. Life then would be wonderful, full of love and passion and music. A sober Deacon was everything she could want in a man, was everything she did want in a man. She'd been willing for so long to put up with the worst he could offer, just to get those days and weeks and months of sweet sobriety. It had felt worth it, even when times were at their darkest, when she wasn't sure if he was just wasted or dead, when she couldn't find him, when he didn't show up. Love got them through those times, but finally she couldn't do it anymore. And that was why she was here, in this small and cozy apartment and he was in the house they'd shared.
She liked this new life though. It had been nice not to feel distracted or anxious or angry all the time. It had been nice to live life on an even keel. It had been nice to be able to laugh again, to feel happy instead of sad, and to sleep with someone who smelled clean all the time. There were times she still missed Deacon. Maybe she would always miss him in some way. But this new life was good and she was learning to appreciate it more and more every day.
Rehearsal was going reasonably smoothly. The new lead guitar player Bucky had found was decent. He wasn't as good as Deacon – probably nobody would measure up to him – but she liked him and he seemed to take direction well. They were taking a break and she was sitting across the table from Bucky, nibbling on fruit.
"So, are you feeling good about John?" Bucky asked, referring to the guitar player.
Rayna nodded. "Yeah, he seems decent. I think he'll work out." She popped a strawberry in her mouth and chewed on it thoughtfully. "Is he happy with us, do you think?" she asked, after she swallowed.
"Yeah, I think so. He was really hoping to land this gig."
She smiled. "Good." She noticed the entertainment section from the Tennessean on the table and reached for it. There were always daily lists of who was playing at what venues that day. She hadn't been to a club in a while and wondered who was playing. Teddy had a business dinner that night and she thought it might be nice to go listen to some new music.
She smoothed her hand over the page and then reached for some grapes while she perused the listings. When she got to the listing for the Bluebird, she saw Deacon's name as one of the performers that night during the late show. She took a deep breath and sat back in her chair.
When she walked into the Bluebird, she didn't see Deacon. She was a little early, so she thought he might not have arrived yet or he might still be in the back. She made her way to the little two top by the bar, out of the way. She'd twisted her hair up on top of her head and covered it with a fedora with a wide brim. She'd battled with herself as she drove over, not exactly sure why she was doing this.
Just as she'd made up her mind to leave after all, she saw him walk in from the back entrance, with his guitar. She suddenly found it hard to breathe. He looked good. She felt that hot curl of desire run through her as she watched him walk to the center of the room and sit in the chair with his back to the front door. She'd be able to watch him, but she wouldn't be in his direct line of sight. She had an overwhelming urge to leave, but she knew she couldn't without him seeing her, so she was stuck. Why did I think this was a good idea? She pulled the brim of the fedora down slightly, to shield her a little more, and took a deep breath.
When the show was over, Rayna waited, hoping for a chance to leave without him seeing her. He'd been great that night. He'd written a lot of new music, it seemed, and had gotten enthusiastic applause from the just over half-filled room. That had never been his problem, though. He was a masterful songwriter and he'd always made everything she wrote better. She could tell that he was writing about her, though, and that had been painful to hear. His songs were full of hurt and anguish and lost love and regret. She was glad he hadn't known she was here.
And then he turned and looked right at her, as though he had sensed her. She held her breath, hoping that her disguise was enough, but she saw a smile break over his face and she knew that it was not. He got up, setting down his guitar, and walked over to where she was sitting. As he approached, she could see that his eyes were clear, his face still as handsome as always. He looked healthy. Watty had been right, it seemed. His smile had gotten broader as he approached.
"Ray," he said. "You came." He stood close but not too close. "How did you know I was here tonight?"
She smiled hesitantly. "I saw it in the paper. And Watty told me you were playing around town. That you were doing good." She breathed in. "I'm glad you're doing better. And that you're playing here."
He nodded. "I play here pretty regular. Other places too." He sat on the chair opposite her. "I heard your record's coming out soon."
"It is. I've got a single coming out in a few weeks, so I've been at the radio stations in town today. I'll be doing the radio show tour starting next week."
He smiled broadly. "That's great, Ray. I know it's gonna be a good record."
She swallowed hard. "I took the songs off we wrote," she said.
His smile faded a bit. "Well, I guess I ain't really surprised," he said, finally.
"I'm sorry," she said sadly.
He shook his head. "No, don't be. It's on me. I got no one to blame but me." He breathed in. "I been going to meetings though. Been doing good." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small coin. He laid it on the table and pushed it towards her. "Just got my ninety day chip on Monday. Again," he said with a sheepish smile. "But I'm feeling good."
For a second, she wondered if it was an old ninety day chip. It wouldn't be the first time he'd made it ninety days, he just didn't usually make it much beyond that. But he didn't know she'd be here, so she thought that was probably unfair. "I'm happy for you, Deacon," she said, sincerely. "And proud of you. That's great. And you're doing it on your own."
He nodded. "I am. I'm glad I got to tell you."
She looked at him. He looked healthy, well. She felt her heart turn over. "You sounded good tonight," she said. "It sounds like you're doing a lot of writing."
"I am. It's good for the soul, you know? Helps to put it on paper, sing it out. You know how that is."
She smiled. "I sure do." She bit her lip. God, I miss him. She looked out over the room, noting it was mostly empty. "I really need to go. But it was good to see you, Deacon." She slid off the chair onto the floor.
He stepped down onto the floor as well. "I'm glad you came, Rayna." She started to walk down the steps. "Can I walk you to your car?" he asked.
She looked at him. "You don't need to." He probably shouldn't.
"I don't mind," he said, and he followed her down the steps and out the door. He walked along beside her, not touching her, as she made her way to her car. She stepped off the curb and stood next to the car door, her back to it, facing Deacon. She felt a quiver of need run through her. She looked up into his eyes, filled with both sadness and desire. "I miss you, baby," he said softly.
She caught her breath. Her heart was racing. "Deacon…." she started.
He leaned towards her. She put her hand on his chest as if to stop him, but it didn't feel to him as though that's really what she wanted. His lips brushed hers lightly. He could hear the catch in her breath. He pressed his lips to hers a little more insistently and she murmured some vague protest. He caught her bottom lip in his teeth and then she was kissing him back, sliding her hands around his neck and threading them into the hair on the back of his neck. He leaned into her, wrapping his hands around her waist, feeling her pressing against him.
She breathed in as she kissed him, letting herself melt into him. This was what she'd missed. There was no taste of whiskey, no smell of sweat. She knew she needed to stop this, though. She was with Teddy now. But she couldn't stop. She didn't want to stop. This felt good and right. But she pulled back from the kiss, sliding her hands down from around his neck, gripping the collar of his shirt. She was breathing hard. "Deacon," she whispered. "We can't do this."
He pushed against her gently, until she was leaning against her car. He raised his hand and ran it over her cheek, his thumb lingering against her lips. She turned her face slightly to lean into his hand. He moved his other hand to the small of her back and gently stroked her there. "Baby, you know you want this," he said, his face inches from hers. "You and me, we're just supposed to be together. Don't tell me you don't want this."
She looked into his eyes, pleading with her. She wanted to be strong, but she'd missed this so much. "I do want this," she said. "But…I can't."
"Yes, you can, baby." He slid his fingers back into her hair and leaned down to kiss her again. She responded to him hungrily and he held her tightly against him. When he finally let her go, they were both breathing hard. "Come to the cabin with me," he said.
"I can't," she said, shaking her head. "I've got rehearsal tomorrow."
"Tomorrow night then. Please, baby." His eyes were begging her.
He was pressed so tightly against her that she could feel his desire for her and that made her weak. She felt like molten liquid inside. "I don't know," she said hesitantly. She was supposed to go out with Teddy on Saturday night, but right then she didn't want to. She knew if she went with Deacon to the cabin, she wouldn't be back Saturday night. Then he kissed her again, sliding his lips along her jawline and then just behind her ear, that way he knew drove her crazy. She drew in a ragged breath and moaned back in her throat. "We shouldn't," she whispered.
"But you want to. I know you do," he whispered in her ear, sending chill bumps all the way down to her toes.
She slid her hands down to his chest and pushed him gently back. She looked into his eyes and her breath was knocked out of her as she saw his need. She knew she felt the same way. She did want to. She wanted nothing else but to be with this man. She lowered her eyes and nodded, then looked back at him. "Yes, I'll go," she said, and then gave him a tiny smile.
He kissed her hard, then smiled at her. "I love you, baby. So much. I'll pick you up, okay?"
She nodded, smiling at him. "I finish rehearsal at seven. At Sound Check. Can you pick me up there?"
He grinned. "I can do that." He smoothed her hair behind her ear. "This is a new beginning for us, baby. I promise it'll all be good."
She nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow. I need to go now." She reached behind her to grab her door handle. She leaned in and gave him a light kiss. "I love you, babe. I love you so much."
He stepped back so she could open the door. "I love you too, baby."
She watched as he ran back to the Bluebird and then she got in her car. She was smiling as she backed out and then got onto Hillsboro Pike to head to her apartment. For a brief second, she thought about Teddy, but she pushed it aside. This was the man she was meant to be with, the love of her life, her soul mate, her true love. This was where she belonged. She felt happy and confident. He was getting back on his feet – on his own – and she was sure he was going to make it work this time.
She sat at her little kitchen table, with her tea, and thought about Teddy. She felt a little bad that it was going to end this way, but the reality was that he was never going to be, for her, what Deacon was. She cared about Teddy and she'd enjoyed their dates, but it wasn't like they were 'going steady' or engaged or anything like that. If she were honest, she thought he probably did think they were exclusive, and truthfully, it wasn't like she had been seeing anyone else. But she didn't love him, even if she had said the words to him. She didn't really. Now that she'd seen Deacon again, she knew what true love really was, and it wasn't what she had with Teddy Conrad.
She wasn't sure exactly how she was going to handle this. She was supposed to go out with him on Saturday night. She could just not be home when he came, and she thought it was likely that would be the case. She smiled a little as she thought she'd probably end up spending the whole weekend at the cabin with Deacon. But to just stand Teddy up wouldn't be fair. He'd been a complete gentleman and he didn't deserve that. I need to tell him. Something.
She ran her finger around the edge of her tea cup, thinking about Teddy and thinking about Deacon. There just was no comparison. She knew that. She also wondered if she should be so quick to assume that Deacon was on the right track. This wouldn't be the first time he'd sobered up and seemed healthy and good and then fallen off the wagon. Could she trust him this time? What made this time different? She had to believe that the fact he was doing this on his own, not because he'd been sent to rehab yet again, that he knew it was now or never, made it different. Should I really do this? Should I really trust him that he's gonna make good on his promise this time?
She sighed. He'd disappointed her so many times. She really wanted to believe him this time though. Something made her think this was for keeps this time. She smiled to herself and then she got up and walked over to her phone. She hesitated for a few minutes, then picked it up and dialed. "Hey, Teddy," she said, when he answered.
Deacon pulled open the drawer where he'd put the ring he'd bought Rayna nearly a year ago. They'd talked off and on about getting married one day, but never made it official. Just when he thought they were headed in that direction, something would happen and he'd be weak and he'd drink again. They would argue and she would tell him she could never truly commit to someone who couldn't stay sober and then it would take months before he could prove to her he could do it. But it was a roller coaster and then it finally was like a walk off a cliff. That last time he'd blown it, she'd left him. He knew she was dating someone else. That was new. She'd never done that before. She'd broken up with him more than once, but she always came back. This time she hadn't and she had started a new relationship, as though she were telling him they really were through.
He'd been so happy to see her at the Bluebird. He had started to think he'd never see her again. She looked so beautiful and she'd been so happy to see him. He couldn't believe she'd actually agreed to go to the cabin with him. So this time he was going to make it work. He looked at the ring again. It was simple, a silver band with tiny diamonds on it. He'd had the word 'Eternity' engraved on the inside. He was going to give it to her finally, ask her to marry him. They belonged together and they both knew it.
He smiled to himself as he let the ring lay in the palm of his hand. This was the way it was supposed to be, him and Ray, together forever. For eternity.
Rayna sat on the couch while Deacon threw out the trash from their sandwich supper and wiped down the counters. He'd been so gentle and loving, as he'd wiped the mustard from her lip and jumped up to refill her glass of tea. She thought about how he'd been on the drive up – all excitement and smiles. He'd reached for her hand and held it tightly, every once in a while bringing it to his lips for a kiss. She hadn't been able to keep herself from smiling. He was so happy and she felt so proud of him. Now that they were at the cabin, he couldn't seem to sit still and she'd wondered, for a moment, if he'd been drinking, but she'd leaned her nose into his neck when he was hugging her and he still smelled clean, not even a hint of whiskey. She looked back at him and smiled.
When he walked over to the couch, she reached for his hand to pull him down next to her, but he resisted. She was puzzled when he knelt down in front of her on one knee instead. "I'm so glad you came tonight, baby," he said, joy all over his face. "I missed you so much and I missed having you here."
She gazed around the room. It had felt like ages since she'd been here, although it really hadn't been all that long ago. She hadn't been surprised, really, that Deacon hadn't changed anything. Her album covers were still all over the walls, the clothes she'd left there the last time she'd been were still in the chest, and even the 'Eternity' sign they'd gotten not long after Deacon had bought the place was still there, over the doors that led to the porch. She had briefly wondered why he still kept everything the same, but that was Deacon. He didn't like change, didn't like to disturb the things that worked.
He was looking at her intently and she focused back on him. "I missed you too, babe," she said quietly. "So much."
He leaned into her just a bit. "I know I screwed up," he said, "and I know you been seeing Teddy Conrad." He took her hand and rubbed his thumb over it and she looked down. She still felt uneasy about how she'd left things with Teddy. "But I don't want you to anymore," he was saying, and she looked up at him. He had such a genuine look of love on his face and her heart ached from it. "I love you, Ray. I love you more than anything else in the world."
She smiled at him as she looked into his eyes. He was her true love, the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. She knew that with certainty now.
"Let's do this, baby," he said, and then he lifted up his hand and she saw that he had a ring between his thumb and index finger. He leaned a little closer. "Please. Marry me."
She felt like she couldn't breathe, as she looked at the ring, and then looked into his eyes. She smiled at him, a little shyly, and then held her left hand out, watching as he slid the ring on her ring finger. She spread her fingers and looked down at the ring, both simple and beautiful, the perfect symbol of their love.
"I love you so much," he said and she looked up at him.
"I love you too," she murmured, as she leaned in to kiss him. Then she took his face in her hands and he wrapped his arms around her waist, leaning into her as they kissed. Then he undressed her, not taking his eyes off hers, and she undressed him. He moved the coffee table out of the way and pulled her gently down onto the rug, reaching for the blanket on the couch to cover them, because he knew she always got cold.
She couldn't recall having a more satisfying night with him and she truly lost herself in the specialness of the moment and the joy in their reuniting. She couldn't wait to spend the rest of her life with him. She had missed his fingers touching her, his lips on hers, the warmth of his body against hers. He kept whispering 'I love you' over and over as he took her to higher and higher heights. She cried out his name as she gained her release and smiled with joy when he did the same.
He couldn't believe he was touching her, holding her, loving her. He tried being gentle but he was so hungry for her that it was hard to hold back. But she seemed to want that as much as he did. He whispered in her ear how much he loved her and he felt like he'd finally found his way home. He promised himself he'd never mess this up.
He finally lifted her up in his arms and carried her back to the bedroom, laying her gently on the bed. He looked down at her and thought about how beautiful she was and how much he loved her. He knelt down on the bed and then stretched out next to her, taking her in his arms and making love to her once more. And when they later were lying curled up together in bed, she held her hand out again, admiring the ring in the moonlight. "This was so perfect, babe," she said. "All of it. And I can't wait to be your wife."
He pulled her closer to him and leaned down to kiss her on the neck. "I'm gonna spend our whole life together making you happy, baby. I promise." She snuggled into him and he wrapped his arms around her. She felt content, like she was where she was supposed to be. When she finally fell asleep, he watched her breathe and thought about how thankful he was to have her back in his life.
And that's where I'm going to end it. At that moment, when it was all still their perfect love in their perfect place.
The song is "Let Me Let Go" by Faith Hill.