Disclaimer: All Stargate SG-1 characters are the property of Richard Dean-
Anderson (so I understand) and no copyright infringement is intended. Fic
is for fun.
Jack O'Neill had taken the SG-1 team fishing. It was their first week of down-time since Daniel's death, and it was obvious that some bonding had to be done with his replacement; Jonas Quinn. It would be Jonas's first taste of the world outside the Cheyenne Mountain base, and Jack knew that the idyllic fishing spot in the hills would give him a good first impression of Earth.
"You just...sit here?"
"That's right."
"And wait for a fish to come along?"
"Yup"
"...What if it takes a long time?"
"Then I wait a long time. Look, are you going to keep asking questions, because if you are, I think you should go and sit with Carter."
Jack had only been on the riverbank for half an hour, and already Jonas was annoying him. The Kelownan just didn't seem to grasp the subtle delights of the fly-fisherman.
"I'm sorry."
Jonas's tone was so despondent, Jack felt a pang of guilt. He was new to Earth after all, and this *was* supposed to be a bonding session.
"It's ok. Look, it's not just about sitting and *waiting*. You have to *lure* the fish in."
"How do you do that?"
"Use a good bait."
"Oh. What do you do with the fish then, once you've caught it?"
"Throw it back."
Jonas raised an eyebrow. He couldn't tell if the Colonel was being sarcastic or not, and he didn't want to sound stupid by asking. Jack turned from his position on the grassy bank and looked at him.
"Or we could eat it"
Just then, Teal'c came over to join the pair. He looked dapper in a loose shirt and wide-brimmed hat, which covered the mark on his forehead.
"Teal'c!" Jonas couldn't quite hide his relief at being joined by the one person he could really call a friend. He was getting bored of 'waiting' for a fish to bite. "What do *you* think of fishing?"
Teal'c paused for a moment, looking at O'Neill.
"I think it is a good excuse to enjoy a lovely day." He sat down on the ground next to Jonas and raised his face to the sun.
"Yeah, don't you ever just...enjoy being outside on Kelowna?" O'Neill asked, shifting his fishing pole for no apparent reason.
"Well...we have sports and things" Jonas said. "But I never really just...sat. Maybe on a nice day, with a book..."
"Ah..." O'Neill nodded. He should've known the alien would enjoy the outdoors through reading.
"Anyway, most of the nice countryside is on the other continents, Tirania and Andara"
"Can't you go there?" Jack asked.
"Relations between our countries aren't that good..." Jonas hung his head slightly. "If I went there I'd probably be arrested and held as a political prisoner."
"Why are you all fighting anyway?" O'Neill had always wondered about this, but it had never seemed like the right time to ask. Even Teal'c looked interested.
Jonas shifted uncomfortably. "It's hard to explain..."
"We have all day" Jack wasn't going to let this one go. Especially since he'd noticed Jonas's complexion colouring. The alien looked at him, then at Teal'c, and took a deep breath.
"Promise not to think all Kelownan's are weird?"
Jack smiled. "I like to think you're the exception"
Jonas nodded, and gazed out on the river for a few moments, thinking through his words.
"Relations between the people of my planet weren't always as bad as they are today. One incident started it all...
...A young man named Noah had been born extremely intelligent. He'd finished school by the age of 15, had a degree by 17 and by the time he was 20, was working in the office of the Tiranian High Minister. He was the Minister for Defence, a post which, in these peaceful times, rendered him able to pursue his other hobbies, which consisted of reading, research into mathematics and history, and eating cheesy-crackers.
...Cheesy-crackers were something of a Tiranian obsession. At least, they were. Until the incident Jonas was relating. Noah, Minister for Defence, made a weekly round of the military offices from which all Tiranian tactical affairs were administered. In peacetime the army was kept small, and only a few missiles were left active, aimed at targets they had little expectation of ever meeting. Noah was impressed, as usual, by what he saw. His military office was well-run and efficient, and as he sat down at the Main Control Unit to look over the information shown on the screens, he smiled in satisfaction, reaching for a cheesy-cracker from the packet he'd brought with him as a before-lunch snack.
...The packet rustled in anticipation as Noah's slender hand reached inside. The cheesy-cracker felt rough to the touch, covered in cheesy goodness. Noah grasped it gently and took it from the packet. Tiny particles of flavouring fell from it as it moved towards his open mouth. The distance closed in slow-motion, Noah's mouth watered as he awaited the cheesy delicacy...
...WHAM! A load of cardboard files fell from a table right behind Noah, causing him to jerk in surprise. The cheesy-cracker went in his eye, blinding him. He screamed, flailing his arms in shock and pain, mashing the keypad in front of him in his agony. A tiny red light began to flash, and 60 seconds later, as a Lieutenant was tentatively removing bits of snack from his superior's face, the Tiranian's only operational High-Destruction Missile launched itself at the Presidential Palace of Andara.
"The Andaris launched missiles at the Kelownans, who retaliated with air bombardments against the Tiranians, and the rest is history" Jonas finished. "Cheesy-crackers were outlawed, and to this day you can't buy them anywhere."
Jack O'Neill smiled at the young Kelownan. He suddenly knew that no matter how annoying the alien may be at times, this bonding mission was totally worthwhile.
Jack O'Neill had taken the SG-1 team fishing. It was their first week of down-time since Daniel's death, and it was obvious that some bonding had to be done with his replacement; Jonas Quinn. It would be Jonas's first taste of the world outside the Cheyenne Mountain base, and Jack knew that the idyllic fishing spot in the hills would give him a good first impression of Earth.
"You just...sit here?"
"That's right."
"And wait for a fish to come along?"
"Yup"
"...What if it takes a long time?"
"Then I wait a long time. Look, are you going to keep asking questions, because if you are, I think you should go and sit with Carter."
Jack had only been on the riverbank for half an hour, and already Jonas was annoying him. The Kelownan just didn't seem to grasp the subtle delights of the fly-fisherman.
"I'm sorry."
Jonas's tone was so despondent, Jack felt a pang of guilt. He was new to Earth after all, and this *was* supposed to be a bonding session.
"It's ok. Look, it's not just about sitting and *waiting*. You have to *lure* the fish in."
"How do you do that?"
"Use a good bait."
"Oh. What do you do with the fish then, once you've caught it?"
"Throw it back."
Jonas raised an eyebrow. He couldn't tell if the Colonel was being sarcastic or not, and he didn't want to sound stupid by asking. Jack turned from his position on the grassy bank and looked at him.
"Or we could eat it"
Just then, Teal'c came over to join the pair. He looked dapper in a loose shirt and wide-brimmed hat, which covered the mark on his forehead.
"Teal'c!" Jonas couldn't quite hide his relief at being joined by the one person he could really call a friend. He was getting bored of 'waiting' for a fish to bite. "What do *you* think of fishing?"
Teal'c paused for a moment, looking at O'Neill.
"I think it is a good excuse to enjoy a lovely day." He sat down on the ground next to Jonas and raised his face to the sun.
"Yeah, don't you ever just...enjoy being outside on Kelowna?" O'Neill asked, shifting his fishing pole for no apparent reason.
"Well...we have sports and things" Jonas said. "But I never really just...sat. Maybe on a nice day, with a book..."
"Ah..." O'Neill nodded. He should've known the alien would enjoy the outdoors through reading.
"Anyway, most of the nice countryside is on the other continents, Tirania and Andara"
"Can't you go there?" Jack asked.
"Relations between our countries aren't that good..." Jonas hung his head slightly. "If I went there I'd probably be arrested and held as a political prisoner."
"Why are you all fighting anyway?" O'Neill had always wondered about this, but it had never seemed like the right time to ask. Even Teal'c looked interested.
Jonas shifted uncomfortably. "It's hard to explain..."
"We have all day" Jack wasn't going to let this one go. Especially since he'd noticed Jonas's complexion colouring. The alien looked at him, then at Teal'c, and took a deep breath.
"Promise not to think all Kelownan's are weird?"
Jack smiled. "I like to think you're the exception"
Jonas nodded, and gazed out on the river for a few moments, thinking through his words.
"Relations between the people of my planet weren't always as bad as they are today. One incident started it all...
...A young man named Noah had been born extremely intelligent. He'd finished school by the age of 15, had a degree by 17 and by the time he was 20, was working in the office of the Tiranian High Minister. He was the Minister for Defence, a post which, in these peaceful times, rendered him able to pursue his other hobbies, which consisted of reading, research into mathematics and history, and eating cheesy-crackers.
...Cheesy-crackers were something of a Tiranian obsession. At least, they were. Until the incident Jonas was relating. Noah, Minister for Defence, made a weekly round of the military offices from which all Tiranian tactical affairs were administered. In peacetime the army was kept small, and only a few missiles were left active, aimed at targets they had little expectation of ever meeting. Noah was impressed, as usual, by what he saw. His military office was well-run and efficient, and as he sat down at the Main Control Unit to look over the information shown on the screens, he smiled in satisfaction, reaching for a cheesy-cracker from the packet he'd brought with him as a before-lunch snack.
...The packet rustled in anticipation as Noah's slender hand reached inside. The cheesy-cracker felt rough to the touch, covered in cheesy goodness. Noah grasped it gently and took it from the packet. Tiny particles of flavouring fell from it as it moved towards his open mouth. The distance closed in slow-motion, Noah's mouth watered as he awaited the cheesy delicacy...
...WHAM! A load of cardboard files fell from a table right behind Noah, causing him to jerk in surprise. The cheesy-cracker went in his eye, blinding him. He screamed, flailing his arms in shock and pain, mashing the keypad in front of him in his agony. A tiny red light began to flash, and 60 seconds later, as a Lieutenant was tentatively removing bits of snack from his superior's face, the Tiranian's only operational High-Destruction Missile launched itself at the Presidential Palace of Andara.
"The Andaris launched missiles at the Kelownans, who retaliated with air bombardments against the Tiranians, and the rest is history" Jonas finished. "Cheesy-crackers were outlawed, and to this day you can't buy them anywhere."
Jack O'Neill smiled at the young Kelownan. He suddenly knew that no matter how annoying the alien may be at times, this bonding mission was totally worthwhile.