Disclaimer: I don´t own Narnia. C.S Lewis does and he is dead. Long live his brilliance.

--

Chapter 1. Time´s out

Susan knocked lightly on the door before entering the small room. A smile played at her face as her three siblings turned their heads towards her. With her hand still at the doorknob, Susan picked up one of the bags. Her smile widened as she talked.

"Are you ready to go?"

-

Half an hour later Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy were sitting in a clearing. The forest was small, and, if you listened carefully, you could hear the sound of the nearby town. As time went by, the four children became more relaxed and enjoyed themselves more. They hadn´t been able to do this for the last couple of weeks, so it was definitely needed time off.

After a while, Susan opened the bag she had grabbed earlier and took out packets of sandwiches.

"Good thinking, Su" Edmund said as he threw himself at the food. "Never been hungrier." Lucy gave out a laugh at this statement but took not care to mention all the other times he had said that.

"What?! It´s true" Edmund clarified with his mouth full. As a response, Peter and Lucy both looked skeptically at him. "What?!" Edmund cried out indignantly. Susan just smiled at them.

-

The sun was at its peak and the four children lay in the grass, looking up at the blue sky. They were just laying there, all thinking about the same thing.

"I wonder how much time has passed now." Lucy suddenly said. Susan stiffened and listened to the others.

"Probably another few hundred years" Peter said like it was the most ordinary thing in the world.

"Everybody´s probably gone by now." Edmund added. Lucy nodded.

"Yeah. I wonder what kind of king Caspian became".

"Would you just stop it!" Susan burst out. She heard the others heave themselves up and turn towards her.

"What´s the matter, Susan?" Peter asked her, a bit troubled by her. Susan sighed.

"Why do you keep talking about that?" she asked. Lucy looked at her.

"Because we wanna remember." she whispered. Susan did not look at them.

"Remember what?!" Her voice was heard and she could hear Lucy gasp. Peter looked bothered at her attitude and Edmund shifted his position so that he could see his older sister better.

"Susan?" Peter´s voice sounded really worried. "What´s wrong?" Susan gave out a sound of frustration and quickly rose. When she turned to look at them, it was with disgust in her eyes.

"I don´t wanna be a part of your imaginary games anymore." Then, she hastily turned around and walked out of the glade. She heard that Lucy started to sob, that Edmund rose and yelled after her, and that Peter told Ed to shut up. She didn´t care.

--

Susan ran, but not far. Out of sight and hearing distance from the clearing, she leaned her back against a tree and slowly slid down. Tears were burning in her eyes. It was easier that way, to pretend that it all was a game, a dream. That she´d never been to Narnia and that she´d never became queen. She knew that eventually the pain would go away. That when she started to believe her own lies, the memories would disappear. But the memories were too fresh. Only two months had passed since they got back to their world, and since then, she knew that she never would return. She would never again see Cair Paravel, Aslan´s How or the dancing lawn. She would never again get to see Trufflehunter, Trumpkin, Reepicheep or Aslan … or Caspian.

Susan gasped, and the tears that had filled her eyes started to fall down her face.

She and Caspian, they had had so little time together. But, she would always remember him. The sound of this voice, the warmth of his body when he hugged her, the scent of his hair… the taste of his lips… and his eyes…those beautiful brown eyes that were almost black. The ones that had looked at her deeply with sorrow, joy and love. She closed her eyes.

Well, maybe not love. But at least with strong affection, she felt it too. Affection strong enough that she would miss him so much. So much that it hurt every time anyone spoke of Narnia, of him, every time she thought about him.

At the sound of a crack nearby Susan looked up, wiped away her tears and slowly started to walk back to the town. The others knew that she could take care of herself, and they knew the way back. She would wait for them in Peter's room, and she would still be angry when they came back.

She would say, "Stop with that Narnia nonsense" and "Then don´t talk about it when I´m around".

She only noticed that she left the forest when it became much brighter. The soft earth road quickly turned into cobblestone and the noises of the town life grew stronger. Susan kept her head low as she slowly walked over a trafficked road.

"Susan!" She quickly turned around at the sound of her younger sister shouting her name. Lucy´s eyes were huge and filled with despair. To avoid the guilt she felt, Susan took a step backwards.

The next thing she heard was a horn blowing, and the thing she saw, was a car, barreling towards her. She closed her eyes.

And then… Bang!

I´m gonna die.

AN: The first chapter is finally out. I don´t know when the next one will come, but I hope you´ll stick out.

I really enjoyed writing this chapter, so I hope you enjoyed reading it.

Please review and I might write faster. XP //Faara