I always wondered if my village cared for me, but I guess not. If they cared they would have tried to save me instead of staying out of the fight, I know they couldn't have done anything,but still they should have at least watch the fight. Instead, they assumed that I must have died or will die so their is no point in checking. They were right.
I should have tried to fight them myself instead of dealing on that stupid old demon cat. It should have been a last resort, I should have fought them myself then use the demons chakra to finish them off.
Then again, I should have done a lot of things. I should have let my teamates become my new family, as I had none. I should have let myself fall in love with the one person that always told me I was never a monster. But,most import I should have stopped myself from becoming a monster.
I know these things now that I am dying, because the monster within was being forced out. I can now see myself, not some monster that I was forced to be, but the person that was forced out do to pressure and the unbearable voice of the two tailed demon cat.
The sacrifice I made for my village should be known, yet I know it wont. If it's known then the village would demand to know why it was a secret. Why they didn't try to help me, why they made me deal with the screeching of the beast it's soothing voice lulling me into a dream like state where I don't know what I'm doing or why.
I have few regrets, yet if I could I would deal with all my suffering that I endured just to fix them. My true love, forgive me for leaving you and please know I loved you.
This is my dying wish, as it seems my time to think clearly has run out. Since I never truly lived then losing my life isn't scary. I shall finally have one true human experience, one true emotion, one life to lose.