Say Anything

Category:angst, hurt/comfort

Pairing: Donna/Thomas, Darvey

Summary: It's 1989 and he's John Cusack, standing outside her bedroom window with a boombox- trying to make her understand.

AN: I haven't forgotten Not Broken, I just needed to get this out of my head :P Am uploading from my phone so apologies in advance for any formatting issues or spelling errors.

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Harvey sits patiently at the candle-lit table, drawing out his phone and frowning at the unknown number calling. His date, Andrea, is in the bathroom and he glances across at her half-eaten meal with a sigh. She seems like a smart and intelligent women, a broker of some sort with stunning looks to match but his heart isn't in the evening. He only agreed to the blind date to get Louis off his back after some comment about him losing his game and he can't help feeling like Lloyd Dobler from Say Anything- pining away for someone who is the complete opposite of the small petite blonde he's here with.

Not for the first time tonight he regrets taking the bait and when the screen in his hand lights up again he accepts the call half hoping it's a chance to escape.

It is but for all the wrong reasons,.

Donna's name and Presbyterian Hospital ring through his head making him regret willing a reason to leave and fear coils in his throat as the nurse explains she was found unconscious in her apartment with multiple bruises and contusions... most likely a break in or robbery gone wrong.

Bullshit.

She lives in a secure apartment and he doesn't know whether to be relieved or furious when the women confirms her 'boyfriend' brought her in, urging him to check his watch. Thomas was meant to pick her up hours ago (he knows because she made a point of leaving early) and he's already throwing money down on the table when the women hangs up.

Screw it.

He'll have Louis apologise for him or not. Honestly he could care less, his only concern getting to the hospital as quickly as possible.

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It takes the cab driver roughly fifteen minutes to navigate the traffic -it should take thirty- and Harvey gives him the rest of whatever's in his wallet.

Once inside It doesn't take him long to spot Thomas, the lanky man's body folded over a plastic chair and Harvey steels himself approaching the CEO.

"What the hell happened?"

Thomas' gaze snaps up confused to see the lawyer. He only just called Louis but his surprise falls second to the man's obvious concern and he sits up straighter addressing the agitation. "I got to her apartment and the door was open..." he shakes his head recoiling at the memory, "I went in and she was out cold on the floor."

The image hits Harvey hard and he can't help his anger boiling up beneath the surface. "You were supposed to pick her up at seven."

Thomas flinches at the accusation. "I was but I got held up in the office," he defends, pushing up to stand at full height, "I changed the reservation to nine." It's the honest to god truth but he's met with a look of hesitation from the lawyer and he bristles at the unspoken insinuation. "Look, call my secretary if you don't believe me."

Silence hangs heavily between them and Thomas twitches, his eyes narrowing at the man stood opposite him. "Harvey, you know me... I'd never do anything to hurt her."

Realistically Harvey knows that and gruffly concedes, scrubbing a hand across his face as he drops down into one of the hard plastic chairs. The relationship bothers him but for reasons that have nothing to do with Kessler personally. The man worships Donna, treats her with adoration and respect… he would never lay a hand on her but someone did and Harvey takes in a deep breath, resting on his knees as Thomas returns to the seat next to him.

They wait largely in silence, the occasional comment slipping in here and there but it's always forced and both give up the platitude when the doctor comes out telling them Donna is awake, suffering a concussion and some bruised ribs but will make a full recovery.

Harvey breathes in properly for the first time since finding out she was hurt. Thomas looks like he's doing the same and it stings because as much as he wants to hate the man he can't.

The doctor agrees to let them see her and Thomas goes in ahead of him, something Harvey's grateful for. It means he has a few seconds reprieve, a moment to take her in while the man fusses- her stubborn reassurance that she's 'fine' twisting like a knife in his gut. She isn't. There's a cut over her eye drawing down to purple discolouration marring her cheekbone and he feels physically sick at the thought of someone touching her. Thomas asks what happen at the same time he meets her gaze and he holds his breath watching the confusion spill across her face. Right, because he's not her boyfriend.

He has no reason to be here aside from still being down as her emergency contact and the fact he's goddamn in love with her.

Thomas presses the question again and Harvey exhales sharply as she tears her gaze back to the tall man perched on the side of her bed. Thomas seems oblivious to her hesitation but he can read the look of uncertainty that flashes across her face, watches the clogs turn in her mind looking for a way to avoid the truth and it kills him. She shouldn't feel the need to lie, not to her boyfriend and especially not to him.

"Donna." There's a gentle warning to his tone and she sighs with a small nod.

"I didn't see who he was..."

The 'but' sits heavily between them and she covers her grazed knuckles, swallowing the memory. She fought back hard- maybe that was stupid but her instincts kicked in and it was only when her attacker got the upper-hand she realised he was there for the sole purpose of delivering a message; one she'd gotten loud and clear. "He said to drop the case against Hardman or we'd regret it."

Anger seethes through Harvey his muscles twitching in spite of his resolve to stay calm. He never thought Hardman would ever stoop to something so low and conniving -a physical attack out of spite- and he turns so fast the room spins, Donna's plea to stop falling on deaf ears as he bursts out of the room.

He's going to kill the fucking son of a bitch.

"Harvey!" Thomas' shout catches up to him, the man's long legs quickly closing the rest of the distance, "where are you going?"

"Where do you think?" He spits vehemently, jerking to a stop when Thomas grabs his arm. The man must have a fucking death wish as well.

Thomas catches the flash in Harvey's eyes and let's go, rasing his hands in surrender. "Look, I get it-" he pushes trying to get a handle on his own emotions, "I want to make the bastards pay as much as you do." It isn't an idle threat. From the moment he found Donna he's been warring against his pacifistic nature but losing their heads won't help. If anything it'll just make the situation worse. "If they're willing to go this far for a warning, what do you think they're going to do if you go at them half-cocked."

"Nothing-" Harvey throws back, guilt lacing the aggression in his tone, "they won't do a goddamn thing to me, that's why they did this to her."

The anguish in the lawyer's expression is obvious and Thomas feels the same sense of regret. If he hadn't postponed dinner, if he'd just gotten to her apartment earlier maybe he could have stopped the attack but there's no point in blaming themselves. It won't do anyone any good, least of all Donna. "And how do you think she's going to feel if you leave?" It's a harsh card to play but there isn't isn't any other choice. They may not be friends or have much in common but it's been clear from day one they both care about Donna. He's never pushed it because he isn't someone who gets threatened easily. If Donna didn't want to be with him she wouldn't be, plain and simple. Truthfully he's grateful she has people looking out for her provided that's Harvey's motivation and not some revenge vendetta clouding his judgement. "Donna's scared and she needs us here right now."

A bitter sound catches in the back of Harvey's throat. If he hadn't been down as her emergency contact he probably wouldn't even know something was wrong. "No, she needs you here." Someone to comfort her and say all the right things. He's never been that person, despite the growing desire to fulfill the role, but he squares his shoulders clinging onto the only source of control he has. "She needs me to go make sure Hardman regrets the day he ever thought he could touch her."

The possessive note doesn't go unnoticed but Thomas glosses over it, his own anger finding a outlet. If Harvey cant be on the same page regarding his girlfriend's needs then they're done even having this conversation. "If you really think that then you deserve to get the shit beat out of you."

He doesn't give any further argument, leaving to go back to Donna and Harvey swears outloud, torn between what he can and can't do. If he stays he stuck saying whatever shit is allowed and he's done with that.

He's through pretending and better Hardman wear the brunt of his emotions because at least then the damange will be mutual.

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It's nearly a full twenty hours before Harvey shows his face again and Donna's relief simmers with anger as he stands in the doorway to her hospital room. The doctors insisted she stay another night, to make sure no complications arise from her concussion, and she can feel her headache starting up as she answers the unspoken question in his gaze. "Thomas is with the police giving his statement."

He nods sharply taking the explanation as his cue to enter. He hadn't even thought about how to handle the authorities, taking the matter intonhis own hands instead, and he stops a respectable distance away from the bed with a concerned expression. "Did you tell them?"

She assumes he's referring to Hardman and closes her eyes. There didn't seem to be any point. Hardman wouldn't have left any evidence trailing back to him and she refocuses, glancing at Harvey and reading the tight expression on his face. He isn't hurt, which is something at least, but there's tension rolling off him in waves and she follows up with a hard stare. "What did you do?"

He stands idly, flexing his fingers. "It doesn't matter." He took care of it. He isn't proud of the way it went down but he'd rather not think about the ramifications. "You dont need to worry, that's all that's important."

It's hardly a reassurance and the regret etched in his locked jaw makes her stomach drop. "You're going to throw the case." She can read the answer in his silence and her anger swells up again. They've come too far, have more than enough to send Hardmand down swinging and she refuses to be the reason Harvey won't fight. "So that's it-" she says with a firm tone baiting him, "you're just going to give up?"

He knows what she's trying to do. She's goading him into changing his mind but for once it isn't going to work. She's worth more than his damn ego and he'll jump through whatever hoops he has to in order to keep her safe. "I'm not putting you at risk."

There's a steely determination to his stance -becuase he cares- but she doesn't let herself linger on the fact. This is too important "Then you're letting Hardman win."

"He already has-" Harvey throws back sucking in a sharp breath, "christ Donna look at you." His mouth clamps shut fighting a wave of emotion as he takes in her appearance.

She wasn't supposed to fight back.

That's how 'eloquently' Hardman had put it and he'd nearly snapped the man's fucking neck there and then. The only reason he didn't is because he knows the prick is just one link in the chain and retaliating would have put her in more danger. The firm and himself as well, not that he gives a shit about that. "I am not letting anything else happen to you."

An almost pained look flares in his eyes and her face softens, her anger mellowing as she holds his gaze. "Harvey, this wasn't your fault."

Bullshit, he thinks, instinct urging him to argue. Hardman went after her because the asshole knew what it would do; hit him where it goddamn hurts and he swallows roughly, dropping his eyes to the bruises circling her wrist- injuries that happened because she goddamn fought back. If she'd been hit any harder, if something else had gone unaccording to plan she might not even be here to fight with him and the thought rips through him sending a spiralling burn across his vision.

"Hey..." Her voice is gentle but has little affect and it takes everything she has not to wince as she folds herself up, reaching for his hand and closing her fingers around his shuddering hand. She's only ever seen him on the verge of tears once, when he found out about his father, and she squeezes urging him closer. "I'm here, I'm okay."

He tugs free and she expects him to move back-at least say something- but his arms rush forward instead sliding around her in careful hold and she stills feeling the weight of his chin rest against her head. They rarely touch anymore, let alone hug, and she's missed the familiarity- the scent that trips her pulse whenever he's close. They're not doing anything wrong, not technically but her heart says otherwise though she makes no move to untangle them. It's selfish but it's the safest she's felt since waking up and deep down she knows that's wrong too.

An innane amount of time passes and eventually he releases her, an ache pulling through her chest when he steps back with a regretful sigh.

"I should go "

She doesn't ask why. She knows why but can't bring herself to care. "I need…"

She stops, trying to banket the guilt that would've come with the admission. After thirteen years she doesn't want to force him to stay, that's not who they are and maybe this time he's right.

"Nothing-" she adds shaking her head, a pityful excuse for a smile sliding into her lips, "I just need some water."

He glances at the jug on the dresser and reaches for the handle, filling a plastic cup as she gingerly rests against the pillows. When he passes it over she winces through two mouthfuls and he takes the drink back, no hesitation to his movement as he settles into the chair beside her bed. It's his best guess as to what she was actually going to say and the relief in her expression quietly mirrors his own. He wants to be here and an amicalbe silence spills into the room as he makes himself more comfortable.

He isn't surprised when she falls asleep or that he feels the same sense of exhaustion pulling at him but he doesn't give into the urge to let go. He'd rather be awake when Thomas gets back and he's content just watching her, taking in the comforting rise and fall of her chest and her soft steady breathing. It's the sound his best dreams are made up and it's cheesy but true.

When Thomas finally does arrive it's with a resigned expression and a sense of foreboding that urges both men out of the room. Harvey doesn't know what to expect but he tenses preparing for bad news.

"I take it you handled things." Thomas knows Donna won't hear them but keeps his voice quiet regardless, Harvey's slow nod making him push passed the knot in his throat. He thought it didn't matter, that the fact Donna chose him meant something, but the last twenty four hours have rammed home what he was too niave to admit; they have a connection but it isn't the same as the bond she shares with Harvey. "I need to go out of town for a few days. I squared it over with the police but given everything I think Donna might take it better coming from you."

"You're leaving?" Harvey asks, his confusion mixing with an incredulous note. He could care less but it's not about him it's about Donna spurring his anger, "what could be so goddamn important-"

"She is." Thomas says matter-of-factly waiting for the other shoe to drop. He tried. He really did but her refusal to talk just highlighted everything missing between them. It's still only early days and if circumstances were different he might have tried to make it work but in light of recent events he doesn't think that's fair on either of them. "You were wrong, I'm not who she needs right now."

Harvey's mouth twists into a frown finding it difficult to believe the man would choose now to be petty. He'd stayed as a friend -that's all- and is quick to defend himself. "She didn't want to be alone, surely you can understand that?"

"I'm not judging either of you-" he shakes his head blowing air into his cheeks, "I'm saying this is the first time she's been relaxed enough to sleep since she got here. You think that's a coincidence?"

Harvey swallows sharply ignoring the question and the way it lodges in his chest but Thomas jumps in before he can explain it away.

"You know I care, that I would do anything for her." It's the truth and if he stops to dwell on it he'll change his mind in an instant- so he doesn't. "I'm walking away because I love her."

Like he did with Hardman, Harvey thinks, deciding maybe they're not so dismiliar atter all. The only difference being Thomas isn't afraid of his feelings. He is but it's about time he stopped running and started fighting for what's really important. "Okay." Harvey nods firmly accepting the hand he's being dealt. "I'll tell her."

It's all Thomas needs to hear and he readies himself to leave, keeping his eyes froward as he stops in line with the lawyers shoulders. "Might be a couple of other things you want to mention while you're at it."

He departs with the piece of advice, his legs carrying him toward the exit. He's doing the right but it still hurts and he just hopes that, given enough time, Donna will come to see it that way as well.

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Donna wakes with a start to the sun streaming in and the sound of a light tapping, her momentary fear replaced as she turns to where Harvey is sat typing away at his computer. He glances up with a small smile and she knots her brow in confusion, her voice still groggy with sleep. "What time it is?"

He checks his watch despite having the laptop open in front of him. "Almost two." She's been asleep nearly fourteen hours, understandable if what Thomas said was true and he brings down the lid folding it on his lap. "Feeling any better?""

Her headache is nowhere near as bad and she nods but still doesn't understand why he's here doing work. "You stayed?"

He humours the question with a light smirk. "I'm your lawyer, it counts as a billable."

There's a teasing edge to his tone but something else caged in his expression and she suddenly realises the oddity, that Harvey's here and not her boyfriend. He was supposed to come back after giving his statement and she frowns instantly on edge. "Where's Thomas?"

Harvey pulls in a breath not sure how to tell her. He's been warring with the decision most of the night, part relived half terrified, but the certainty he keeps landing on is he can't keep lying to himself. She means everything to him and the timing of the realisation couldn't be worse. "He had some business to take care of outside the city."

"He left?" The explanation doesn't make any sense. Thomas wouldn't just leave, not without at least saying goodbye and she probes Harvey's gaze, reading the sympathy in his expression. It adds to her frustration and the worry knotted in her stomach. "Did he say when he'll be back?"

Harvey winces giving a slight shake of his head. "I'm sorry Donna."

The genuine apology rams home what he isn't saying and her pride falls by the wayside as the hurt rattles through her chest. "He's breaking up with me? After I almost-" she doesn't finish the sentence, doesn't want to think about what could of happened and stares at him flatly, "why are you telling me this?"

He expected the anger and wishes there was a way to soften the blow. Under normal circumstance it would be a cowardly move on Thomas' part but he knows why the CEO did it, because if he'd stayed any longer he wouldn't have been able to walk away. "Thomas asked me to."

"Why?" It's not a reason, at least not one she's willing to accept, and she watches his expression soften his eyes revealing more than his words do.

"You know why, Donna."

He's wearing the same look he had that night at her apartment -when he admitted he loved her- and a tightness winds in her throat. She was happy with Thomas, actually moving forward with her life and she isn't going backwards again. "No, that isn't fair-" she tries shaking it off, knowing she can fix everything. She just needs to talk to him. "I need my phone."

Harvey doesn't argue moving his laptop aside so he can stand. Her purse is on the dresser next to the water jug and he fishes inside taking out the device, hesitating before handing it over. He can spend the rest of his life pretending he's okay with her seeing someone else and maybe he'll get over it or maybe he won't, either way she deserves to know the truth. "If you tell Thomas he's wrong, that he made a mistake... he'll come back."

There's a but coming and she tries to stop the word before it leaves his mouth. "Harvey."

"It isn't fair-" he agrees swallowing hard, finding a way around his fear, "but before you call him, I need you to know that he was right."

He doesn't know if admitting it will change anything but this is his Lloyd Dobler moment. It's 1989 and he's John Cusack, standing outside her bedroom window with a boombox- trying to make her understand.

"I love you donna."

Her heart skips and she withdraws her arm laying it gently over her bruised ribs, a futile attempt to protect herself against another empty promise. She can count the number of times they've been here and won't give in, not without something else. "How?"

He opens his mouth to explain, his jaw hanging slack at his brains inability to piece together the right words but after thirteen years its about time he tried harder and he expells the answer beneath his breath, "completely.."

She closes her eyes torn between what he's asking of her and the life she was trying to build for herself. He had his chance but she doesn't reach for the phone, can't. Becuase she loves Thomas but it's always been Harvey and she does the only thing she can.

Tells him she needs time.

He doesn't argue, has no right to.

When she's discharged he takes her home, stays on her couch untill she's comforable being in the apartment and they find their rythm together again.

Even if she's never ready he could be okay with just the level of ease between them but he realises one night late at work- when she takes him by suprise with a kiss, nothing will ever compare to the feel of her in his arms.

She pulls back and he's Lloyd Dobler in the car after sex, shaking without a way to explian it. She looks at him quizzically and he captures her mouth before she can ask.

He isn't John Cusack, this isn't a scene fron Say Anything and they don't need a movie reference.

It's their moment and he's holding everything he needs.