Roman Holiday

by watson374

May, 1979. Lily and Sirius go to Italy to stop some valuable magical technology from falling into the wrong hands.

ROMAN HOLIDAY

—

"May, 1979. Lily and Sirius go to Italy to stop some valuable magical technology from falling into the wrong hands."

—

For everyone who, directly or indirectly, taught me the value of knowing when to stand and fight.

—

At precisely one o'clock in the afternoon, a tall young man materialised in a swirl of crimson robes with a soft pop in the right of way behind a row of ornate, well-kept Victorian townhouses in north-west London. He straightened his robes and then, with a somewhat distracted briskness, strode out to the street.

He stopped between houses Number Six and Number Eight, and tapped his wand on the wrought-iron fence that divided them; instantly, the magically-hidden Number Seven forced its way in between them to reveal itself. After pausing for a moment to admire the house, he took the steps three at a time and burst through the front door.

He made his way through the entrance hall and past the dining room directly to the sitting room overlooking the garden. The door had been left ajar, so he creaked it open and stepped in.

"Hello, Frank."

He whipped around to see a casually-dressed young woman with long auburn hair in an Eames lounge chair looking at him over the top of a well-worn copy of Private Eye. "Hey, Lily," said Frank pleasantly.

She flicked her wand at the record player, pausing it. "What're you doing at Headquarters in the middle of the day?"

"Long story."

"Excellent. Care to join us for lunch?"

"That'd be lovely."

Lily gave him a single nod before she put her book down and leapt out of the lounge chair. "Head in first—I'll get James and Sirius."

"Good luck with that." Frank swept from the sitting room to the dining room, where he was immediately fussed over by a house elf in a crisp bed-sheet toga.

Lunch was chicken tikka masala. Although the food itself could easily have been from any respectable Muggle take-away establishment, it was served by the house elves on the finest china and silver anyway. Frank closed his eyes and savoured the aromas while waiting for the others to arrive.

Eventually, they did arrive—in spectacular fashion. Two young men entered the dining room, one bespectacled with messy jet-black hair and another in a leather jacket, laughing riotously at nothing in particular. Lily followed closely behind, stowing her wand in the pocket of her shorts as she stepped over the threshold. They all took their seats at the table; Frank gestured to tuck in.

The bespectacled man tore a piece off his naan. "So, Auror Longbottom—pray tell, what brought you to Headquarters at lunchtime?"

Frank exhaled slowly as he spooned curry on his rice. "Funny you should ask, James. We—in this case, both we the Aurors and we the Order of the Phoenix—have found out through our network of contacts and moles that some junior Death Eaters have been sent to Rome, in Italy—"

"We know where Rome is, Frank," pointed out the man in the leather jacket.

"—to try and steal—yes, Sirius, I know you can read a map, but I work with people who can't tell Maidstone from Maidenhead, so you'll have to forgive me for that lapse—anyway, they're trying to steal the original magic for Vanishing Cabinets in Rome, which is where they're made, presumably so they can build more and use them for the usual nefarious purposes."

"Wait," interrupted James, "there's still the original magic? I just assumed—"

"That we just had a finite number of them and no way to create more?"

"Well, yeah."

"In Britain, yes—only this particular magical furniture outfit in Rome has the original magic to build them new."

"Huh." Sirius dipped some naan in his curry. "I did not know that."

"Nor did I until today! Anyway, some of the underlings who do Lucius Malfoy's dirty work have been assigned to this—Avery, Mulciber, Rosier and Wilkes—and they're Portkeying out tomorrow morning. It looks like a lower-level assignment—there's no indication Voldermort knows or cares—but we really don't want them getting hold of the ability to use any more Vanishing Cabinets than they already have."

"Right," said Lily. "Well, you don't have a great selection of people—we're it, I think."

Frank's eyes narrowed at James and Sirius. "We are not sending you two on a mission of your own ever again." Facing matching mutinous looks, he doubled down and ploughed on. "Fortunately, Mad-Eye has reserved James for another mission—please ignore his feigned expression of confusion—I know Mad-Eye's briefed him already—anyway—you, Lily, are going with Sirius."

"Excellent." Lily paused. "How're we getting there?"

Frank grimaced. "Unfortunately, we suspect that the Portkey office has moles sympathetic to the dark side, so that's out."

"Apparition and Floo?" Lily tilted her head. "No, they're only domestic."

"Brooms?" suggested James eagerly.

"No."

"No?"

"No. Potter, if you think we'd fly all the way to Rome on brooms, you need to be admitted to St Mungo's," said Sirius seriously.

James folded his arms. "I'm all ears for other suggestions."

"We'll go by Muggle aeroplane." Lily checked her wristwatch. "There's enough time."

"I find that difficult to believe," said Sirius.

"Frankly, Muggle aeroplanes are more fun than brooms." Frank took a maroon manila folder out of his robes and slid it across the table to Lily. "Anyway, we've endorsement from Dumbledore to do this. The folder'll contain everything you—and Sirius, if he decides he has the patience to actually read for once—need to know."

"Thanks." Lily put her cutlery down and stood up. "sI need to make a phone call." She paused on the threshold. "Oh, and thanks for this, Frank. I'm bored out of my mind here."

"Anytime, Lily," said Frank pleasantly.

"Am I not good enough for you?"

"James—"

—

It is quite often the case that people well out of their comfort zone are very obviously so. Given that the confines of a deep-level Underground train are not, generally speaking, somewhere witches and wizards are much accustomed to being in, it was immediately apparent to even the least attentive observer that the two men sitting knee-to-knee in the transverse seating in the centre saloon were thoroughly unused to the environment they found themselves in. One constantly looked around in wonder, and the other examining the seating moquette dispassionately. Surveying them with no small amusement from the aisle hanging by a bobble-strap was Lily, looking straight out of a London Transport poster in her monochrome Mondrian mini-dress.

"Ingenious, these Muggles!" exclaimed the taller of the two men, his expression of child-like amazement at a really rather ordinary means of non-magical transport contrasting markedly with his rather severe bomber jacket. "And to think there is a network of these—oh, come off it, Sirius—this is a fantastic beast!"

"Arthur, we've taken the Underground before."

"No need to rain on our parade."

Lily grinned down at Arthur. "It really doesn't get old, does it? I remember my first ride when I first came down to London—it was all so dizzyingly exciting to go underground, and the trains were all so sleek, and the crowds just unbelievable for a little girl from the North."

"So," said Arthur theatrically, raising his voice slightly to be heard over the dull roar as the train entered a tunnel, "why're you off to Rome?"

"Order business," said Sirius vaguely.

"Ah. Something too dangerous for those of us with children?"

Sirius broke into laughter. "You know it."

Arthur nodded. "So, Lily—there's something I've always wondered."

"What's that, Arthur?"

"How in Merlin's name do aeroplanes stay up?"

Lily chuckled lightly. "I'll have to sit you down someday to explain it all."

—

As his meal tray was cleared, Sirius cleared his throat and turned in his seat to Lily. "I've decided that being served a meal on an aeroplane is the pinnacle of human ingenuity."

"Sirius, you were served a sandwich. London to Rome is not a long flight, even if our jet equipment got swapped out for a turboprop."

"I would sell James to have a sandwich on a broom."

"One, you'd probably sell James to have a sandwich on the ground; and two, on a broom, you're the pilot at the controls the whole time—"

"I have two hands."

"—so it's not like you'll have your hands free to accept a tray—"

"Who said anything about a tray?"

"—not that there'd be anyone to serve you in the first place."

"Ugh, fine."

Lily gazed out the window at the spinning propellers. "I like flying, especially on these props. My first flight was on one of these, incidentally."

"So why d'you shriek and run away every time James suggests you join him for a spin on his broom?"

"It's a different sort of flying."

"But it's still flying!"

"It's different. Brooms are like riding a rocket with no wind protection whatsoever. Flying on an aeroplane, in the comfort of a pressurised fuselage—I mean, it's just so completely different an experience that I can't believe I'm trying to explain it to you."

"This is like being on the Knight Bus instead of being on a motorcycle."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Ugh, fine."

Lily moved her gaze to the back of the economy class seat in front. "Flying is an escape for both of us," she observed coolly.

Sirius grunted.

"It's important to have your forms of escape—keeps you sane and happy—that's why we're fighting this war, isn't it? For the right to be sane and happy?"

"I'm in it mostly to stick it to my bloodline."

"Well, yes—that too."

"I hate my family. Thank Merlin—well, James' parents—that I got out of that damned house and out of London."

Lily flinched. "I've always liked London."

"You didn't grow up in a pure-blood prison in London."

"No, you're right. I grew up in a working-class prison in the North." Lily looked out the window again. "We all have our own happy—and unhappy—places."

"Yeah." Sirius leaned back into his seat. "How do I get another drink? I've just remembered we're travelling for a fight we're almost certainly going to be outnumbered in."

"Call button."

"This one?

"No, not the one with the lightbulb—the one with the bloke carrying a tray."

"Oh, right."

A steward appeared as if rubbed from a lamp, and Sirius promptly ordered the stiffest drink available. Lily stuck with water.

After one sip, Sirius grimaced and put his glass back down on his tray table. "Anyway, the people I am share a bloodline with by accident of my birth are vile."

"Yeah, you've established that."

"I hate everything they stand for, but especially the notion of blood purity—it's the most repugnant form of discrimination based on things people can't change, and yet here we are. Look at you—you're twice the witch or wizard the rest of us could hope to be."

Lily shrugged. "Being Muggle-born just means I've had to work twice as hard," she said softly.

"I noticed."

"The Muggles have this sort of discrimination too, y'know."

Sirius sat up straight. "Really?"

"Yeah. Got to see it in London as a girl."

"Tell me more."

"Sure." Lily shifted in her seat to better face Sirius across the empty middle seat. "How much have I told you about the London part of my childhood?"

"More than I can recall right now, I'm sure."

"Great." Lily sipped her water. "Growing up in the North of England was bleak, especially after things went south in the Muggle economy around the time I started at Hogwarts. I went back most school holidays only to be bored out of my mind. Don't get me wrong, it was nice to be home with my parents; but God, the town I grew up in was dire, and you can only go so far with a stack of paperbacks and a cassette tape player."

"So you became friends with Snivellus out of boredom?"

Lily's eyes flashed dangerously. "It was more because he was the only magical peer I had from before I came to school and you know that."

"Sorry."

"Anyway, I eventually persuaded my father to let me visit my London uncles—the airline and railway ones—"

"You refer to your relatives by the industries they work in?"

"Well, no—this is just convenient shorthand because you don't know their names."

"Right, carry on."

"Anyway, I started visiting London a lot—I'd usually visit each one twice a year—they came back up North for Christmas and Easter—and it was immediately liberating, even when I was only twelve. The only rules we were bound by were that we had to be home in time for tea—dinner, sorry—and that we couldn't spend more than we were allotted. Other than that, we could do as we pleased, and so my cousins and I had the most wonderful adventures."

"What does this have to do with discrimination?"

"London's a lot more diverse in terms of where people've come from than where I grew up, and so I spent a lot of time talking to people—shopkeepers I'd buy things from, cooks on break, bus drivers and conductors, station assistants, and so on—who'd come to England in search of a better future, but who faced an enormous uphill struggle because they weren't white."

"Oh."

"The discrimination varies from boring administrative nonsense, like how they made the bloke from Hong Kong who ran my uncle's local shop complete a typing test on a typewriter that was impossibly hard to type on so they could deny him a postal job, to just flat-out abuse, like how my favourite Jamaican conductor'd been called names that'd make your cousin Bellatrix blush."

"Merlin."

"So yeah, this whole divide-and-conquer thing—it's not new or unique." Lily toyed briefly with her empty cup. "That's why I'm here."

"I hate people." Sirius drained his drink and winced as his put his glass back down on the tray table.

"You and me both." Lily took out a red tin, complete with the airline's stylised swift logo embossed on the lid, and popped it open to reveal a deck of playing cards. "Care for a distraction?"

—

Lily led Sirius down a narrow cobblestoned street lined with low-rise buildings in a variety of pastel colours with petty traders milling about that looked and felt much like the last five or six they had already been through.

"I cannot believe that their Diagon Alley is so hard to find."

"Diagon Alley's not easy to find in the first place if you don't know what you're looking for." Lily scowled at the scant notes Frank had provided. "It just says that once you're on this street, and we are, you enter through this tabbachi—"

"This what?"

"Tobacco shop. They're identified by a big blue sign with a white 'T'."

They both looked around and saw several such shops.

"Um, that doesn't narrow it down much. Did Frank provide you with a photograph?"

Lily rifled through the folder. "Good heavens, so he did." She checked the photo against each tobacconist on the street and eventually found the correct one.

The tobacconist was tiny, and Lily found herself having to squeeze gingerly past precariously stacked displays of every imaginable kind of smoking paraphernalia.

"Sirius, what're you doing?"

"Buying a pack."

"Now? Really?"

"Yes, really." Sirius paid and slipped the pack into his jacket. "I think it perfectly reasonable to stop briefly to buy a pack of smokes after you made me wait fifteen minutes at the airport after arrival so you could get changed." He made his way over to Lily, scowling at her casual attire of her old school shirt tucked into high-waisted denim shorts.

"Don't be daft—just because I had to wear a dress and boots for the flight doesn't mean I'm stupid enough to wear them for a fight with four Death Eaters. I'd rather be able to run, hence the Converse." She kicked him lightly for emphasis.

"Why don't I get to be comfortable for the fight?"

"Because, Sirius, you can duel in a suit, and you know it. Also, you're in Italy—you could wear your usual bell-bottomed trousers here, but you'd look ridiculously out of place and they'd be a trip hazard." Lily shoved past him. "Let's go."

They stepped out into the brick courtyard behind the tobacconist to find an older wizard in well-cut, shabby robes tapping the bricks with his wand. Seeing Lily and Sirius, he raised an eyebrow.

"You magic?" he asked sharply.

They withdrew their wands from their pockets just so, and he nodded curtly before turning back to tapping the bricks in a very specific order. The wall slid apart like Underground train doors, and all three of them stepped through.

"Right, so this magical furniture shop is apparently down the first left."

They took the first left and soon found themselves in front of Giuseppe's Magical Furniture. The shop was rather small, although palatial compared to the tobacconist, and although it stocked more than just cabinets, there was a prominent display in the window of a tall, dark cabinet so plain that it could possibly not look out of place in any setting.

"Here we are."

"Yeah, and so are they," said Sirius grimly.

"Oh, those two in the black robes?"

"Yeah." Sirius pointed to two figures in black robes thoroughly unsuitable for late spring in Italy standing in front of the counter, deep in confrontational conversation with a wiry wizard behind the counter who was waving his arms at them. "Avery and Mulciber. Mulciber's the taller one."

"I take it they're trying the soft approach first."

"I'm surprised they're trying. They usually go straight for the fireworks."

"They're overseas, though—their boss doesn't have the same clout here."

"No, that's true."

They watched through the display window as the two Death Eaters continued their war of words on the wizard behind the counter, which appeared to be going around in circles. This went on for about five minutes before Sirius became visibly bored.

"D'you fancy some lunch?" he ventured.

"Are you mad?"

"Well, they're clearly not very good at this, so we might as well get something to eat while we wait for the fireworks." Sirius pointed to the cafe opposite the furniture shop. "Coffee would be good too."

"Alright—just make sure we're seated outside so we can watch them."

They were quickly seated in the alfresco dining area by a waiter in a jacket that slowly cycled through a few colours. Lily ordered a toasted piadina with proscuitto, mozzarella, tomato and rocket; Sirius opted for a hearty slice of mushroom pizza; and they both had an espresso each.

"Lily, this is great!" exclaimed Sirius. "Where has this been my whole life?"

Lily chewed on her delightfully cheesy bite of piadina before responding. "Er, here the whole time?"

"Oh, yeah."

They finished their lunch in silence and not a moment too soon. As Lily and Sirius dusted crumbs off their clothes, they spotted two hooded figures marching down the laneway towards the furniture shop, silver masks reflecting the sunshine.

"Reinforcements," said Lily tightly. "I don't think they know we're here."

"Good. Ready?"

"Ready."

They both stood up and pointed their wands at the Death Eaters walking towards the shop. "Stupefy!"

Two jets of red light shot out but were immediately parried by a Shield Charm. Both Death Eaters spun around and began throwing curses indiscriminately in the general direction of the cafe. Bystanders shrieked and dived for cover; Lily took cover in the doorway; Sirius leapt through the open window and entrenched himself behind the espresso machine.

Leaning flush against the door frame, Lily flicked her wand at the parasol over the alfresco dining area. The parasol snapped shut and rocketed straight up out of its mount, then hurled itself like a throwing spear at the Death Eaters. The Shield Charm was cast too late, so the parasol hit one of them squarely in the chest; he stumbled back, landing on the pavement just as his mask was Summoned away.

"Hello, Rosier!" bellowed Sirius, ducking behind his makeshift parapet as a jet of purple light took out the cafe's signboard. "Fancy a brew?"

Rosier clearly did not take kindly to having his mask stolen. "Hello, blood traitor!" he spat, rising to deflect Sirius' stream of espresso cups flying at him and resume throwing an assortment of curses through the window.

Meanwhile, the other Death Eater had advanced to the edge of the alfresco dining area, wand held high. Lily watched him inch closer in the reflection offered by the conveniently-placed refrigerator. As he approached the threshold, she jabbed her wand at the wooden bench; it flew straight into the Death Eater's stomach, winding him. She dropped to a prone position and rolled just far out enough to take aim at him through the doorway again.

"Depulso!" she screamed.

The Banishing Charm connected, sending both the bench and the Death Eater flying; together, they crashed through the display window of a cauldron retailer.

"Accio mask!"

The mask zoomed out from the wreckage; Lily torched it mid-air.

"Nice one, Lily!"

"Thank you!"

As Sirius continued to battle Rosier, she returned her attention to the furniture shop. What was visible of the shop through the window looked like it had been bombed while she had been occupied. The door opened, and Avery and Mulciber stepped out.

"Rosier!" roared Mulciber. "We killed him and got the books—let's go!"

"Where's the nearest Apparition point?" demanded Rosier, as the three of them formed a triangle to slowly retreat around the corner under the cover of a triple Shield Charm.

"Not far—follow me," said Avery.

Sirius jumped over the counter and landed in a crouch next to Lily. "We can't let them go."

"How do we get them?"

"Hmm." Sirius looked up and spotted a bright red motor scooter. "See that Vespa?"

"You're joking."

"I am not." Sirius rose and sprinted towards the Vespa, motioning to Lily to follow him.

Sirius mounted the scooter and poked the ignition with his wand and then kicked the lever to start. Mercifully, the Vespa sprang to life. Lily took the pillion seat and held on for dear life as Sirius took off in pursuit of the Death Eaters.

"I'm assuming I'm your gunner."

Sirius nodded. "Unfortunately, I need two hands for this."

They slipped around the corner and immediately spotted the three Death Eaters walking down the laneway with their backs to them. Lily pointed her wand at an empty ice cream container and swung it in a sweeping motion towards the Death Eaters; it flew forward and smacked Mulciber's head.

"Oh, bloody—"

Shield Charms went up again as the three Death Eaters broke into a sprint. Sirius tore after them in pursuit; Lily found more everyday objects along the way to pelt them with.

Eventually, magical Roman laneways petered out to Muggle Roman laneways—although the magical shopping precinct had just the one entrance, it had multiple one-way exits—and the Death Eaters instantly pivoted to looking for a means of Apparating out.

"Diffindo!"

Lily slashed her wand at Avery; his robes tore, tripping him.

"Confringo!"

A large can of cooking oil exploded in a fireball; the blast threw Avery sideways, slamming him head-first into a stone wall; he crumpled in a heap and stopped moving.

As they entered a piazza, Mulciber and Rosier split: the former continued running forwards, with Sirius still in pursuit; the latter dived down an alleyway, and almost immediately was behind Sirius and Lily.

A jet of blue light hit the Vespa's front wheel, jamming it; but as the rest of the scooter continued to obey the laws of Muggle physics, the rear flicked upwards, and both Sirius and Lily were trebucheted across the piazza; they landed softly, rolling on the cobbled pavement to absorb the impact; they took cover behind unusually large potted plants as bystanders fled and shrieked about terrorists.

"Lily, get Mulciber! I'll hold Rosier off!"

Sirius' wand was a blur as he laid down a blanket of covering fire to suppress Rosier and prevent him from moving forwards. Mulciber raised a fresh Shield Charm, and kept it low. Prone behind her potted plant, Lily pointed her wand at what remained of the Vespa, then flicked her wand first from left to right then upwards and towards her; the wrecked scooter scraped sideways until it was on Mulciber's six o'clock, then launched itself at him. The wreckage slammed into his back, eliciting a howl of pain. Two books dropped onto the pavement.

"Accio books!" The books zoomed straight into Lily's non-wand hand. "I've got them!" Lily conjured a postman's satchel and shoved the books into it. She threw the strap over her head and crouched, ready to bolt. "Sirius, I've got the books!"

"You've what?"

"I've got the books!"

"Did you hear that, Rosier? She's got the books!"

"Sirius, you idiot—"

"Let's go!" Sirius dived behind another potted plant. "Run!"

They both took off at a sprint down the nearest alleyway they could find, with Rosier right on their tails. They raised a Shield Charm each and kept running, turning into different alleys at random in an attempt to throw him off, but he managed to stay close behind. Eventually, they entered a Muggle multi-storey car park by a side entrance.

"We need," panted Lily, "to make the drop."

Sirius propped himself up on a Fiat motor car. "The what?"

"If we can get to it before Rosier catches up, we can drop the books off so they can't steal them back."

"You're a genius. Where's this drop?"

"City swimming pool. There's a special locker with a Vanishing Drawer. The best part is, we can Apparate there."

"Where is it?"

"Here." Lily handed him a slip of paper with exact Apparition coordinates. "See you there."

They spun on the spot and disappeared with a deafening stereo crack.

—

"Wow, this place is heaving." Sirius looked at the entrance to the city swimming pool complex with no small trepidation. "Why couldn't we Apparate straight into the complex?"

Lily shrugged. "Because we'd probably end up appearing in the middle of a hundred people due to the crowding. Muggle pools are like that in summer." She tilted her head. "There's a bit of a queue, so we'll need to sneak in."

"How?"

"There'll be a service entrance. Come on."

Lily led Sirius around the perimeter of the complex in search of a service entrance, and soon found one. It was the size of a standard door, but consisted of metal bars rather than a solid panel. She flicked her wand lazily at it; the lock popped immediately, and the door swung open; they both slipped through and found themselves in another multi-storey car park.

"Right, now to find the changing room."

"Why the changing room?"

"Frank's notes say that the Vanishing Drawer is in the less-used ladies' changing room on the mezzanine level overlooking the pool." Lily peered around a corner. "Based on the noise of screaming children, civilisation is this way."

Sirius' eyes went wide for a second. "What an interesting choice of location."

"No, you are not invited."

He scowled. "I didn't ask."

They eventually found the changing rooms on the mezzanine and discovered they were helpfully deserted. Unfortunately, the men's and ladies' changing rooms were on opposite sides of the pool.

"Huh. Might look a bit suss, having you hanging around here."

"I've a workaround."

"Really?"

"Yes," said Sirius smugly. "Watch this." He promptly transformed into a large black dog.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Bloody Animagi," she muttered, stepping into the changing room.

There were a great many lockers, so Lily began prodding each and every one of them to figure out which one the correct one was. She soon found one that was half the depth of the rest of them, and prodded the rear panel of it with her wand. It glowed red, so she prodded it again. A handle revealed itself, and she yanked it. What came out was a long, narrow drawer much like a safe deposit box from a Muggle bank. After thumbing through them briefly to ensure that they did in fact contain Vanishing Cabinet designs, she placed the books into the drawer and tapped them with her wand.

"Headquarters," she said softly.

The books glowed red for a moment, and then Lily closed the drawer. Sparks flew out, drawing at first one tick in grey, then two ticks in green. Satisfied, she rose to leave the changing room; but as she pulled the door open, a series of barks boomed from just to the left of it.

"Sirius, what're you—"

She looked down just in time to see Sirius, still in dog form, charging down the mezzanine at Rosier and a revived Mulciber.

"Oh, blimey."

Sirius lunged at Rosier and sank his jaws into the Death Eater's calf; Rosier screamed in pain, writhing on the floor as Mulciber desperately tried to take aim.

"Expelliarmus!"

Rosier's wand flew out of his hand and out of sight. Mulciber slashed his wand at Rosier and dog-Sirius, sending Sirius flying back towards Lily. Lily instantly laid down covering fire; Rosier and Mulciber dived behind the balustrade.

Sirius reverted to human form. "Reducto!"

The entire wall behind the two Death Eaters exploded, throwing door splinters and bits of brick all over them.

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody door off!" yelled Lily.

"Let's get out of here."

They broke cover and sprinted down the narrow stairwell to return to the car park.

"We need a car." Lily pointed to a gaggle of sunburnt tourists loading their bags into a small hatchback. "How fitting. See those Great British Lobsters over there by that Mini?"

"Yeah?"

"We're taking that."

Heavy footfalls reverberated from the stairwell. Lily and Sirius bolted for the Mini.

"Stupefy!"

The tourists crumpled on both sides of the car, unconscious.

"Accio keys." The keys flew into Lily's hand. "Shut the boot. I'll drive."

Sirius slammed the boot lid shut and took the passenger seat.

"Let's go."

Just as Sirius closed his saloon door and Lily started the engine, Rosier and Mulciber reappeared, running down the car park floor towards. Lily carefully backed the Mini out and then, once they were clear of the parking space, gently began driving away from the Death Eaters.

"I was expecting you to go faster."

"We are inside a car park, Sirius." Lily steered their way calmly out of the complex. "Can you please see if there's anything good on the radio?"

Sirius twiddled the radio frequency knob a little; the first channel he found was playing a spirited if faintly comical saxophone piece.

"Aha! This is perfect."

"What is this?"

Lily gave Sirius a funny look. "It's the chase theme song from The Benny Hill Show."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You have so much catching up to do when we get home." Lily checked the rear-view mirror. "Oh no! It appears that our Death Eater opponents have found themselves a Fiat."

"How can you be so comfortable?" yelped Sirius.

"Because," said Lily with an unabashed and somewhat unhinged grin, "this is my comfort zone."

A small, round and erratically-steered car jerked towards their Mini; initially, Mulciber drove fairly slowly, but started to get more and more aggressive, going faster and faster and closing the gap between them.

"Right, here we go. Mini versus Fiat." Lily stomped on the accelerator and the Mini sprang to life; they tore down small streets with the Death Eaters hot on their tail as everybody dived for cover.

Sirius held on for dear life. "Are you insane?"

"I'm not talking—this matters." Lily yanked the handbrake and swung the Mini's tail out with an almighty screech, allowing her to take a very sharp turn down another street; furious local motorists honked loudly as Mulciber slammed on the brakes and tried to keep up while turning conventionally.

"Merlin, Evans—"

"Pipe down, Black—I need to concentrate." Lily had her foot to the floor again as they took down a wide avenue with a more generous speed limit. Mulciber managed to keep up, albeit with far less precision; at one point, his Fiat sent a crate of oranges flying.

"He's surprisingly good," said Lily, eyes narrowed and scanning for something—anything—to throw Mulciber off with. "OK, hold on tight."

"What're you—"

Lily braked hard and threw the Mini into a hard left off the road; it bounced painfully down a flight of stone steps.

"Evans, what the in the name of—"

Mulciber followed them down; they tore down the riverfront with the Fiat in hot pursuit. The road was narrow: a stone retaining wall lined the city side, broken only by more staircases; and the river was on the other, with a drop of mere feet between the road and the surface of the water.

"EVANS," shrieked Sirius, "THIS IS A CYCLE PATH—"

"Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!"

Mulciber floored his Fiat and brought it close enough for Lily to see just how pale Rosier was in the passenger seat as he frantically waved his wand out of the passenger window casting nothing. Lily edged closer to the water and slowed the Mini down just enough to let the Fiat start to pull up alongside. Mulciber's eyes lit up as he nudged closer and closer, and then—

BANG.

Lily jerked the Mini back away from the water, shoving the Fiat into the stone wall; the Fiat spun around on its tail and impaled itself sideways into the wall. Smoke came pouring out of its engine bay; the Death Eaters leapt out.

"Aha!" Lily slowed down to a more sustainable speed. "Well, that was fun."

"Um, look again."

Lily's eyes flicked to the rear-view mirror just in time to see a broomstick fly into the hands of each of the Death Eaters crouched beside their wrecked car. "Oh, blimey."

The Death Eaters kicked off and immediately dived for the Mini. Lily had her foot to the floor again almost instantly; and so the chase continued, with the Mini at just above the water and the flying Death Eaters staying low and close, only climbing to soar over bridges, of which Rome had many. Curses of every imaginable kind rained down on the Mini.

"So much for the Statue of Secrecy." Lily's eyes flicked left and right looking for an exit.

"Question: can the Killing Curse penetrate metal? Because I think those two are trying—they seem very angry that we stole their books."

"No idea; but for now, let's get away."

Lily spotted the exit she needed: a stormwater drain. It was at roughly right angles relative to the river, with the riverside cycle path rising slightly to allow the water to drain underneath it; the drain itself was much larger, and she immediately recognised it was large enough to fit the Mini through. Lily threw the car into another handbrake turn and hurtled it into the drain, still driving with her foot to the floor; and two painful broomstick crashes could hardly be heard over the noise.

"We've lost them!"

Lily brought the Mini to a screeching, sloshing halt. "Ever Apparated from the roof of a car?"

"Even stationary," panted Sirius, "you are terrifying."

"I know." Lily slumped against the steering wheel, exhaling noisily. "Let's get out of here—I've had enough."

—

"I could get used to this."

"Sirius," said Lily tiredly, "you're already used to champagne."

They had somehow managed to not only check in and clear Italian immigration and customs on time but also be invited to pay for an upgrade from Economy to Club. Lily had seized on this and happily handed over the money, for it unlocked precious lounge access, so she could attempt to drown herself in the shower, which left her feeling vaguely human again, and so Sirius could sample every snack and beverage.

"I have to say," Lily went on, "that Club is a great experience, but maybe that's because this is only my second time in Club."

"Really?"

"Yes, which is how I knew that idiot gate agent was talking out of his other end when he tried to deny my Club boarding because he thought my shorts were obscene." Lily leaned back into her fully-reclined seat complete with pillow. "My first time was when I got to accompany my uncle to Tel Aviv when the airline had to fix one of these lovely jets after a hard landing, but that's a story for another day. My brain is officially out of service until we get back to Pemberley."

"What is Pemberley and why d'you keep calling James' house that?"

"Long story."

"Ugh, fine." Sirius looked up at the screen at the front of the cabin. "Is this film any good?"

"They're showing Oliver! It's great. Sound for the film is on the first audio channel."

"Great, thanks."

Lily plugged the provided headphones into the socket and selected an audio channel that was suitably contemporary; she unrolled her sleeves, leaving them uncuffed, and closed her eyes; and then she sank back into the seat and pillow, letting the orange light of the setting sun clash with her hair as her shoulders finally began to relax.

—

FIN