Miraculous Meme

Disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous Ladybug or the memes and shitposts.

Warning: A few cuss words and suggestive themes because c'mon guys these are memes and shitposts.

This is literally a bunch of teenagers doing memes please don't take this seriously.

"Okay, okay, I got one!"

Four pairs of eyes turned to Rena Rouge, who sat against the chimney of the roof. It was night and the five Miraculous holders were on patrol.

"A duck-sized horse, or a horse-sized duck?"

There was a tired sigh as Ladybug leaned against Chat Noir's back.

Here we go again.

"Can you imagine riding a duck?" Carapace asked in whispered awe.

"I would prefer the duck-sized horse," Chat Noir yawned, stretching his arms out in front of him.

"That's because you're allergic to feathers, Kitty."

"Don't expose me like this, my Lady!"

"Wait, I think Chat is onto something with the duck-sized horse," Rena Rouge sat up. "It could be your little pet and cuddle you at night."

"Don't horses sleep standing up?" Queen Bee spoke up.

"Yup," Ladybug gave her fellow bug a thumbs up.

"So they wouldn't be able to cuddle."

"Don't ruin my dream, Bee!"

Carapace slammed his hand against the roof, gaining everyone's attention.

In the most serious voice he said. "I wanna see Ladybug riding into battle on a horse-sized duck."

"Oh my God," Ladybug let her face fall into her hands as her teammates laughed.

Ladybug raised an eyebrow as a guilty-looking Chat Noir met her on a rooftop. "What happened?"

The cat-themed hero nervously scratched the back of his neck. "Alright, but you can't get mad."

"What happened?"

"I was minding my own business-"

"Liar," Ladybug sighed, rubbing her temples.

"I waaassss!" Chat whined.

A smug-looking Rena Rouge turned to Carapace. "The Earth is flat."

Ladybug was reconsidering certain life choices that lead her to this moment.

A smirking Carapace turned to Rena Rouge mid-leap from rooftop to rooftop.

"Water isn't wet."

Ladybug tripped when she landed and fell off the roof.

"My Lady is smol," Chat Noir grinned as he picked up a so done Ladybug off the ground. "But she's also stronk."

"Chat. You have two seconds to put me down before you see how stronk I really am."

Chat Noir watched as Ladybug punched an Akuma in the face. "Step on me."

"What?" The spotted-hero glanced at her partner, not catching what he said.

"What?" The cat-themed hero panicked.

"Ladybug would be nothing without her yo-yo!" The latest Akuma yelled.

The battle fell to a halt as everyone turned to look at the hero's reaction.

"Chat, hold my yo-yo," The spotted-hero held her yo-yo to her partner, who took it.

"Punch him in the face, LB. I got your yo-yo."

Everyone cheered as Ladybug beat up the Akuma without her yo-yo.

Ladybug dodged a kick from an Akuma, flipping away. "Chat Noir! Support!"

The feline-themed hero must have been having an off day. "Well you have very nice hair, your costume is a beautiful shade of red, and honestly, you're the only person I can rely on."

"I meant punch him, you stupid cat!" Her face softened. "But thanks, you know. That really cheered me-"

Ladybug was interrupted by the Akuma punching her in the face.

Feline green eyes gazed lovingly into beautiful blue. "I love you."

"I think I may have developed some kind of attachment to you too."

Ladybug giggled at Chat Noir's deadpan look.

A very tired Marinette turned to Alya, who was sitting next her while the two rested on a school bench.

"I hate it when I get inspired to art. And then I art. And the art says no."

Alya pat her best friend's back in sympathy. The creative block was hard this week.

Chat grinned as he landed on the roof in front of Ladybug, who was distracted by something on her yo-yo.

"How's the prettiest person in the world doing?" He winked in a flirty way.

The spotted-hero didn't even look up from her yo-yo when she casually responded. "I don't know, how are you?"

There was a moment of silence.

Chat's voice cracked. "I'm fine."

Blue eyes scanned the destroyed battlefield. "How are we lookin'?"

Chat flexed his arms. "Sexy, but it's not like we're trying too hard. Like, sure we're trying, but it's almost effortless."

Ladybug's face immediately turned done. "...I MEAN THE BATTLE, CHAT! THE BATTLE!"

Carapace grinned as he picked up a small puppy that was pawing his leg off the sidewalk. "A pupper, yes."

"What the hell is a pupper?" Queen Bee raised an eyebrow under her mask.

"It's a really small doggo," Rena Rouge answered. "You know, the bork bork kind."

"I feel like I'm having a stroke," Ladybug put a hand on her chest as Chat snickered.

"Can we go get Ice Cream?" Carapace asked.

"Did you ask Ladybug?" Chat rested his hands on his hips.

"She said no," Queen Bee crossed her arms with a pout.

"So why did you ask me?"

Rena Rouge smirked. "Cuz she's not the boss of you?"

Chat's eyes went wide as a thought went through his head. 'It's a trap. It's a trap.'

A teenage blogger ran over to the Miraculous Team before they could all run away and blurted. "Imagine if someone handed you a box of all the items you lost throughout your life!"

"It would be nice to get my sense of purpose back," Queen Bee thoughtlessly responded.

Chat Noir gasped. "Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!"

"My will to live!" Rena Rouge grinned. "I haven't seen this in fifteen years!"

"I knew I lost that potential somewhere!" Carapace threw his arms up.

Ladybug clasped her hands in front of her. "Mental stability, my old friend."

Alix, who was skating by once the fight ended, stopped and said. "Guys, could you lighten up a little."

Using both her arms, Ladybug picked up the latest Akuma they were fighting, startling both the Akuma and her partner.

"This bitch empty!" The spotted-hero pulled her arms back a bit, before throwing the Akuma with all her might. "YEET!"

Chat whistled as the Akuma flew over head for a good distance. "Nine out of ten, my Lady."

Ladybug sighed deeply. "Remember: If you bite it and you die, it's venomous."

Carapace raised a hand. "What if it bites me and it dies?"

Queen Bee scoffed. "That means you're poisonous. Jeez, Carapace, listen up."

Chat hummed. "What if it bites itself and I die?"

"That's voodoo," Rena Rouge answered.

"What if it bites me and someone else dies?" Queen Bee asked.

"That's correlation, not causation," Ladybug put a hand on her hip. They're going to be here a while.

"What if we bite each other and neither of us die?" Carapace spoke up again.

"That's kinky," Chat smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Oh my God," Ladybug facepalmed.

"What do you guys want for Christmas this year?" Ladybug casually asked.

"I don't know, financial security?" Carapace scratched the back of his neck.

"A sense of purpose?" Chat suggested.

"A nap would be nice," Rena Rouge yawned.

Carapace randomly spoke up during patrol. "Synonyms are weird because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest, that just sounds nice and cosy, but if I invite you to my cabin in the woods, you're going to die."

Chat immediately jumped on this. "My favorite is "butt dial" vs "booty call.""

"It's called connotation," Queen Bee jumped over a small gap between buildings.

Rena Rouge smirked. ""Forgive me father, for I have sinned" vs "sorry daddy, I've been naughty.""

"Great news!" Ladybug yelled in false cheer. "Language has been cancelled!"

Ladybug sighed. "Look guys, I need help."

"Love help?" Chat.

"Emotional help?" Carapace.

"Help moving a body?"

Everyone turned to look at Rena.

"What?"

Most of these moments were incorrect quotes from the Internet, so credit to those people!

If you guys want a second chapter just let me know and I'll try and think up something!