The Legend of Zelda: Link's Odd Jobs - Part 1
Link wasn't always the hero of Hyrule.. but he's probably better off!
It all started one day when young Link went to find a job. He'd checked the want ads, and, not having much experience, decided to become a delivery boy.
Foreman:"Here you are, your first packge. Take this to the Cucco Lady of Kakariko Village."
Without delay, Link sped to the woman's home, but found the door to be closed, so he grabbed the knocker and gave it a good pounding. While he was waiting, he seemed fascinated by the cuccos in their pen. He was so fascinated, when the woman answered the door he didn't notice her and grabbed her "knocker." She gasped and took the package from him, then promptly smashed him over the head with it. Needless to say, he was fired after he regained consciousness.
On his next attempt, Link went to the boy scouts. He figured he could redeem himself as a good boy this way. His first assignment was to sell cookies for the girl scouts to prove that he wasn't a groper. So, he took the box and proceeded on his way.
Link: "Hi, I'm selling crunchy mint-filled cookies. Would you like a-". The door was slammed in his face. This happened over and over again. Finally, Link sat down to have a drink of Lon Lon Milk before going back out... but he'd accidentally taken the spiked milk from his boss's cupboard! After unwillingly getting drunk, Link set out again.
Link: hhhhhhhiiii there, pretty lady.. *hiccup* The woman smiled as she greeted him. "Yes, what can I do for you?" Link waved a box of half-eaten cookies in her face and replied "I'm sellling crummy shit-filled cookies" The woman gasped. "Excuse me? Did I hear you correctly?" Link got all cocky and started swinging his finger around.
Link: Do I lloook like a fuckin doctor to you, bitch? I asked if you wanted some cummy tit-chilled cookies..."
The woman was stunned and fainted.
To Be Continued..... :)
Link wasn't always the hero of Hyrule.. but he's probably better off!
It all started one day when young Link went to find a job. He'd checked the want ads, and, not having much experience, decided to become a delivery boy.
Foreman:"Here you are, your first packge. Take this to the Cucco Lady of Kakariko Village."
Without delay, Link sped to the woman's home, but found the door to be closed, so he grabbed the knocker and gave it a good pounding. While he was waiting, he seemed fascinated by the cuccos in their pen. He was so fascinated, when the woman answered the door he didn't notice her and grabbed her "knocker." She gasped and took the package from him, then promptly smashed him over the head with it. Needless to say, he was fired after he regained consciousness.
On his next attempt, Link went to the boy scouts. He figured he could redeem himself as a good boy this way. His first assignment was to sell cookies for the girl scouts to prove that he wasn't a groper. So, he took the box and proceeded on his way.
Link: "Hi, I'm selling crunchy mint-filled cookies. Would you like a-". The door was slammed in his face. This happened over and over again. Finally, Link sat down to have a drink of Lon Lon Milk before going back out... but he'd accidentally taken the spiked milk from his boss's cupboard! After unwillingly getting drunk, Link set out again.
Link: hhhhhhhiiii there, pretty lady.. *hiccup* The woman smiled as she greeted him. "Yes, what can I do for you?" Link waved a box of half-eaten cookies in her face and replied "I'm sellling crummy shit-filled cookies" The woman gasped. "Excuse me? Did I hear you correctly?" Link got all cocky and started swinging his finger around.
Link: Do I lloook like a fuckin doctor to you, bitch? I asked if you wanted some cummy tit-chilled cookies..."
The woman was stunned and fainted.
To Be Continued..... :)