Disclaimer: I do not own Rosario+Vampire.
"...Why did Kurumu-chan call us all here again?" Moka asked aloud, looking at Mizore, Ruby, Kokoa and Yukari, who were basically staring off into space with blank looks on their faces. It had been an hour ago that the succubi girl had called all of them to meet in one of the empty classrooms, and still Kurumu herself had yet to arrive.
Mizore shrugged and leaned back in her chair. "Who knows? Maybe...she wants an orgy?"
"That's what YOU want..."
"...So? LOOK, I HAVE NEEDS, OKAY?!! GOD!! GET OFF MY BACK, WOMAN!!!"
Moka was about to reply, when the door slid open, and Kurumu stormed in, carrying a large manila folder under her arm. Standing at the front desk, she placed the folder down, and turned to face the five women she had gathered to this place.
"WELCOME...TO THE FIRST MEETING OF THE 'COMMITTEE OF DESEXUALIZING FEMALE ANIME CHARACTERS'...we can call it 'C.O.D.F.A.C.' for short!!"
Mizore stood up and slammed her hands on her desk, exclaiming, "YOU MEAN...WE'RE NOT HAVING AN ORGY?!!"
Kurumu shook her head.
"Fuck...I'm outta here..."
However, before Mizore could even open the door, Kurumu flew over and smashed her foot into the back of the yuki onna's neck, causing her to lose consciousness.
"This group was formed with the intent to help lower the incredible amount of sexual fanservice that female characters in anime provide nowadays..." Kurumu told the others as she dragged the comatose body of Mizore back to her seat.
Moka thought about it for a moment. "You know...considering who WE are, and what series we're in...isn't this a bit...I dunno...ironic??"
"What do you mean?" Kurumu asked.
"Well," Moka began to explain, "I mean...look at...look at your chest...it's freakin' HUGE..."
"YEAH, YOU SLUT!!" Yukari snapped.
"SHUT UP, YUKARI, OR I'LL STUFF MY BOOBS DOWN YOUR THROAT AGAIN!!!" Kurumu threatened, and the little witch girl immediately closed her mouth.
"You see?! That's what I'm talking about!!" Moka exclaimed, "This entire school is obsessed with sex, and we're the ones they wanna gang-rape!!! We were CREATED solely for sexual pleasure...nothing else!!! Don't you understand, Kurumu-chan?!!"
"...You're saying you LIKE being molested by an entire mob without any warning, are you?!!"
Moka shook her head. "Of course not!! As long as Tsukune likes me, then I couldn't care less about any of these perverts...I'm just saying that what you wish to achieve is IMPOSSIBLE IN OUR SERIES!!!"
"LIES!!!"
"YOU KISSED MIZORE FOR FAN SERVICE'S SAKE, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!"
Kurumu gasped; Moka was right...for once!
"It...it can't be true..." she stammered.
"Sorry, Kurumu-chan," Moka replied, "But...that's the way life is."
"Then...shall we just strip naked and parade around the school yard, smothering ourselves in chocolate syrup and whip-cream, and wear signs that say 'YOU CAN DO US ANY WAY YOU LIKE?'" the succubi suggested sullenly, utterly defeated.
"I'm game." Kokoa said, and she tore off all her clothes, and ran for the door, but it suddenly swung open...
...and Tsukune stepped in, wearing a tuxedo. He was carrying Ginei in his arms, bridal-style...who happened to be wearing a wedding dress.
Tsukune sighed. "...It seems I have gotten married."
"CATCH, BITCH!!!" Ginei shouted, and he threw the bouquet right in Kurumu's face, knocking her out.
Moka slapped her hands to her cheeks and cried, "O...M...GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!"