DISCLAIMER: Harry Potter and crew aren't mine-they belong to JK Rowling. I'm not making money, don't sue me. The Purple People Eater and The Killer P{op Tarts aren't original either: the purple people eater, I'm not sure whose it is, the Pop Tarts are Marco's.
NOTE: This is the second challenge story I've posted. The first was "shh....I'm watching the spoons grow..." and is in no way related to this one. It was better, though. This challenge was issued by me to a friend, but I still had to write a story to go with. The requirements are as follows: The story must contain:
*"I am the queen of safety pins."
*"This is my hairbrush-hairbrush, meet Harry Potter."
*An enchanted mousepad
*"Oh a little conch shell! It's so pretty, so delicate! I think I'll smash it..."
*"Oh, no! Garlic cloves! And Killer Pop Tarts! Ruuuun!!!!!!"
*Harry has to giggle
*Ron has to wrinkle his nose.
*Fred in drag.
*Purple People Eater
*Quidditch monsters
*"hoofle loofle"
*someone has to spill barbie pink nail polish
*This phraze has to be sung: "Mr. Band-aids! Mr. Band-aids! ! Sdia-Dnab .rM Sdia-Dnab .rM"
*"!ynnuf ruoy, eeh ehh"
*a tutu
If you'd like to try writing one, please do, but I'd appreciate a copy of it. My e-mail address is in my profile. Thanks, and please review!
Harry Potter watched as Dumbledore stood up and made his way to the podium. Harry felt very hungry and impatient for the headmaster's first day of school speach.
Dumbledore stood still for a moment, then announced. "Welcome students. This year we have some bad news. The Quidditch monsters have been on a rampage." A gasp and ripple went through the crowd. Harry frowned, confused. He glanced over to one of his best friends, Ron Weasly, and was surprised to find the tall boy deathly pale, with his mouth hanging open slightly.
"What are the quidditch monsters?" Harry whispered the question.
Ron turned to look at him. "The quidditch monsters are these ghoulish beings that come and attack Quidditch games with enchanted mousepads!"
Harry stared at his friend, shocked, then started to giggled. He giggled a moment, then began laughing. All around the Hall, heads turned to stare at him. "Quidditch monsters that attack games with enchanted keyboards," Harry laughed. "Yeah right!"
Ron, who was rapidly turning red, nodded gravely. "It's true."
On the other side of Harry, Hermione Granger leaned over. "Harry, shut up!" she hissed. "Your making an ass of yourself!"
Harry slowly quieted, then looked between his friends and finally the rest of the Hall. he gulped. "You mean it's true?" he asked. Both Ron and Hermione nodded. "What about our Quidditch match?"
"Mr. Potter has asked an interesting question," Dumbledore said suddenly, drawing the attention back to himself-and making Harry blush as he realized that he'd spoken too loudly. "We can obviously not hold our matches this year," Harry growned along with the rest of the hall-louder, in fact, then most people. "So instead, we've decided to hold other contests so people can gain points for their houses: chess matches, scavenger hunts and, tomorrow being the first one, crazy days."
Much to Harry's surprise a cheer went up from the students and all the teachers-Snape excluded-smiled.
"Crazy days?"
"From midnight to midnight tomorrow," Dumbledore was continuing. "Points will be awarded for every crazy, outrageous things done. The crazier the more points. And no, with the last words 'hoofle loofle' lets eat." The headmaster sat down as food appeared on the table.
Once again the room erupted into excited talk. Harry almost forgot about not having Quidditch, as he happily dug into dinner and contemplated the next day.
***
"Crazy day! Crazy Day! Crazy Day!" Harry opened his eyes to find Ron standing nearby, grinning. "Come on, Harry!" Ron exclaimed. "Crazy Day started nearly four minutes ago! Lets get started!"
"Wha..?"
Ron grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him forcibly out of bed. "Hermione is waiting for us,"
Harry stumbled out the door after his friend. "Waiting for us to do what?" He mumbled, rubbing sleep from his eyes.
"She's gonna help us get ready, of course," Ron said, bounding ahead, dragging poor Harry behind him. "In her room."
For the first time since being pulled from bed, Harry looked around. With a shock he realized that they were nearly at Hermione's room.
They stopped at their friend's door just as it opened and a pretty, unfamiliar girl stepped out. She was tall, thin, with huge breasts and dark orange hair. She looked nearly like a Weasly.
"Hey Fred," Ron greeted her-him!-with a grin.
Harry gawked.
"Hi Ron, Hi Harry," Fred said, laughing at Harry's facial expression. "Like it? Add 50 points to Griffindor!"
"Ron? Harry?" Hermione stuck her head out the door and grinned at them. Harry was surprised to find that she looked like herself! "Come on in! I'm finished up with George now,"
Ron hurried in the room and Harry reluctantly followed. Thankfully, George wasn't in drag-no short skirt or belly shirt. Instead he wore a lunp purple suit, a long trunkish-thing and swimming cap over his hair. Hermione was painting his face the color of grapes.
"What are you s'possed to BE?" Harry asked after a second. This was definately odd....
"The purple people eater." When George spoke a mouth-like thing under the trunk opened and closed and purple fangs were breifly revealed. "Hermione is really good."
The young witch smiled at the praise. "Okay," she said at last. "Your done,"
With a sinister and amusing looking grin, George joined his brother outside and Hermione turned to Ron and Harry. "Okay," she said, sounding much to happy for someone who was up at midnight doing freaky makeup on guys. "Whos first?"
"I'll be!" Ron volenteered enthusiastically.
"Yeah," Harry agreed. "He'll be." He moved to sit on the bed as Hermione went to work on their friend.
For a moment, Hermione regarded Ron, then nodded. "Okay, I know what I'm gonna do,"
"What? What?" Ron sounded waaaay to excited and happy.
"First, what time is it?" Hermione asked.
"Ummm...." Ron checked. "12 after 12,"
"Then lets do this on the roof and get more points." Hermione suggested. Ron grinned enthusiastically and Harry moaned.
Hermione opened the door and led their way into the hall-people were out of their rooms already, talking excitedly-some in costume. Harry was sure he saw a girl wearing her clothing upside down and another person (who was unrecognizable) wearing nothing but several garbage cans-one of his. or her, head. A couple people were chanting "!ynnuf ruoy, eeh ehh" over and over again.
Harry was actually happy when they got to the roof.
Harry lay down on his back, as out of the wind as he could be, while Hermione started getting Ron in costume. He closed his eyes, wishing to be back in bed, and actually drifted off for a while.
Harry woke to Ron standing over him, grinning. And Harry screamed! "Ron!" he gasped staring in spite of him self. "You naked!"
"No, I'm not," Ron declared, puffing his chest out. "I'm wearing band-aids!"
Harry looked closer and saw that Ron was right-he was almost entirely covered (minus hands, face, feet and hair) by band-aids! But in the dark light.....Harry shuddered.
"Your turn," Hermione declared.
Harry looked at her in horror. "oh God." He mumbled thinking about backing away or jumping off the roof to escape his apparently phychotic friends.
"Nope," Hermione said cheerfully. "He couldn't come, so he sent me. Lets go." She drew a bag of stuff forward. "First of all," she rummaged a moment and finally withdrew a tutu. "Put this on."
Harry stared at the clothing-it was pink and ugly. Not only was it a tutu, he realized, but Hermione also had a matching leotard and tights! He shuddered again, in distaste, but finally took the offending clothing, at Ron and Hermione's glares.
Hermione turned her back while Harry struggled into the tight clothes, and finally turned back around. Harry stood, somewhat slumped, looking very odd in the ballet attire. Hermione smiled and reached for the bag again.
"Now," She declared, pulling a brush out. "The hair. This is my hairbrush-hairbrush, meet Harry Potter." She stepped forward and forced Harry to sit down while she brushed his hair out. "Ron, in my bag theres some pink nail polish, would you get it out for me?"
Harry twisted to stare in horror at his friend, but that only suceeded in making her accedentally pull his hair. Ron took the nailpolish-which was a truly horrendous shade of Barbie pink- out and opened it. He started up to where Harry was sitting, and tripped!
"Ugh," Ron wrinkled his nose at the smell of spilt nail polish. "It stinks!"
Behind Harry, Hermione frowned. "Yeah, it does....damn. Any left in the bottle?"
Ron checked. "Yup," he finally declared.
"Well close the bottle and go back to my bag. I want the pink spray on hair dye,"
Harry's scream echoed inside the Griffindor tower.
It was nearly one in the morning when Hermione, Ron and Harry returned. Harry had reluctantly put up with everything, and found himself a pink fairy, Ron remained Mr. Band-aids and Hermione had put thousands of safety pins on her robes and wore crown of them in her hair.
Harry was scowling, but was relieaved to find the Griffindor house all just as nutty. They past Ginny, who was staring intently at something in her hands. She was dressed in some sequin-covered thing that looked suspiciously like a teddy. As they past, Harry heard her say, in a soft, sweet voice, "Oh a little conch shell! It's so pretty, so delicate! I think I'll smash it..."
They came upon Fred and George, who took one look at Ron, and burst out singing "Mr. Band-aids! Mr. Band-aids! ! Sdia-Dnab .rM Sdia-Dnab .rM" and dancing a little jig. Ron joined them.
Harry and Hermione watched for a moment then started over to where a Professor sat wearily taking note of all the odd things and assigning points for them. Hermione stopped before the Proffessor, struck a pose and anonounced, "I am the Queen of Safety Pins!" she glanced at Harry and added. "And he's the pink fairy."
Someone snickered at the last part and announced "Harry Potter's gay! Fred, you gotta boyfriend!" The room erupted into laughter-even the Proffessor laughed!-as Harry blushed as pink as his hair.
The laughter broke off when someone else ran into the room. Two people actually, one dressed as a blueberry pop tart with a bite taken out of it, and the other dressed as a clove of garlic-complete with a very strong garlic smell.
"Oh, no! Garlic cloves! And Killer Pop Tarts! Ruuuun!!!!!!" Someone shouted loudly, and the room erupted into laughter and running.
Harry finally cracked a smile. This just might be fun......
Ron tugged at his arm. "Come on," he said excitedly. "Fred and George and us are going back to the roof to sing Beatles songs! It'll be-"
He stopped-in fact all noise stopped-as Dumbledore's voice boomed through the school. "Students and faculty," the eccentric man announced. "I have good news! The Gudditch monsters have been stopped, and so our anual games are back on!" There were cheers at this. "But, the Crazy Days are now off. Any points you may have recived so wfar will be valid, but it ends now." The people in the Griffindor house moaned. "I suggest showers and sleep, good night."
Somewhat disapointed about what was starting to be fun, but happy about the Quidditch match, Harry decided to take Dumbledore's advice, and headed to the showers.
***
The next day laughter followed Harry down the hall,. He steamed, glaring at everyone who so much as looked at him, his face deep red with embarrassment and annoyance.
The pink hair dye just wouldn't come out!
THE END
Sorry about the end, I just HAD to do that, but I didn't have anything else to add. Please review. =)