"Tell me about your dream you had recently" requests the therapist the moment I lay down in the chair, I take a deep breath and decide to share my darkest of secrets, the dream in which I interviewed the world's worst fictional couple
"Well you see, it went like this" I close my eyes, take a deep breath and begin to talk
"Hello, my name is Alyssa and today on the show World's Weirdest Couples, we will be interviewing the pair that caused a worldwide craze, two people who belong to a world where vampires sparkle, couples get together for the craziest of reasons, and a girl who was caught between a cold, undead, forever immortal vampire and a beautiful, youthful and fascinating (as fascinating as a person who came from the mind of Stephanie Meyer can be). Please welcome, Isabella and Edward Cullen
*The pair walks in and the crowd is silent, looks of distain and regret for even stepping foot in the studio are evident in the crowd. In the front row, a group of girls casually waiting to see the couple they wish to have, despite the hundreds of issues a couple such as these would imply. *
"Hello there" Edward's voice oozes boredom as he sits down into the chair with his equally bored expression. Bella trails behind him, refusing to sit down until she sees that her partner has already sat, as though she was a lamb following a shepherd, I could not help but to smirk at the odd sight, reading about the pair had been well a journey so sitting down with them in real life, or as real as one's dream could be, was an odd experience.
"Thank you for stopping by for the interview, we are going to start right away with a few of my own personal questions and then the room will be opened up to the audience for their own comments and questions" I pull out the piece of paper from my pocket and open the questions, scanning the page I find the first question and read it over before looking up to the pair to ask the questions everyone was dying to know
"Bella, why did you think it was a good idea to fall in love with a vampire?" she looks towards Edward who nods briefly before beginning to speak
"You can't choose who you fall in love with, that would be like asking for someone to choose between their children and pick a favourite, you may joke and say that you prefer one over the other but you don't exactly mean it" she stops and stares at me awaiting my response, not knowing what to say except perhaps becoming a vampire herself has made her smarter than she once was, but something told me that would not be the case
"Okay, well why would you want to become one yourself and do come up with the idea almost as if it was something as simple as choosing what groceries to buy" I tried to come up with questions that would apparently puzzle the girl which due to her expression appeared as though it was working, although the girl never seems to show any genuine emotion so it is nearly impossible to tell.
"I did it because he is my soulmate of course, I would do anything for him"
"Okay but even if that meant sitting there watching as everyone you have ever known, anyone you have ever truly loved besides that of your in laws just grows old and dies while you sit here never aging and having to live life on a continuous loop just for the affections of one person? I'm sure I am not the only one to find this odd"
"It's what I chose to do for love" she replies, using the same excuse again, who would've thought someone such as her would be so crazy as to assume that love would be the reason for immortality
"And how is your child, has she married your werewolf yet" I ask, and the pair both seem to immediately tense up, I could hear a low growl ring through the male's throat and it was clearly through the atmosphere that I had made the conversation awkward
"She and Jacob are not together if you must know, he knows that it would be extremely difficult considering our history to immediately be with my daughter" Edward finally speaks, Bella was gripping onto his hand tight, it had made me scared for a moment not wanting the still recently turned vampire woman to pounce because I had mentioned a tough subject
"History? You mean the time when Jacob was in love with Bella and had no reason to even attempt to hide it until one day you have your child together and then as soon as he looks at her he imprints on the little baby no longer worrying about what happens to his Bella? Edward how does it make you feel knowing the Cullen females are being chased after constantly by dogs?"
"The circumstance isn't ideal, but it is my family and it is perfect" says Bella and at that I can hear a collective groan come from the lips of the audience
"Oh yes, what a perfect happy family of sparkly bloodsuckers and dogs you are, your human family members must have lots of fun being surrounded by that" I laugh and now even the female vampire is beginning to look upset at my questions
Edward immediately shoots up from his chair, grabbing his wife and lifting at her arm so that she stands up beside him as well.
"Thank you for the time but I no longer feel as though I want to be here" says Edward throwing me a look of distain which I can't help but to reciprocate
"But we haven't gotten to the audience questions" I ask with a fake look of surprise, in all honesty I was hoping that the interview would fly by because the semi-conscious me was not amused by the dream my mind had concocted that night.
"Unfortunate" they say and immediately exit the building, the audience can't help but to burst out laughing as they disappear and then the dream is cut off due to the alarm ringing to wake me up
"And that was how I ended up having the worst dream of my life, and now we are here, what do you think this means doctor?"
"Obviously, you are regretting ever loving the series and the characters and this is your way of showing to yourself just how stupid of a series it was in the first place" the doctor says immediately and I can't help but to agree, teenager Alyssa had a very poor taste in fictional characters
The end.