*disclaimer: i do not own kuroshitsuji:(
You know, when you think about it, God doesn't have wings himself…
Even when the devil has them.
"Young Master."
People say that all that matters is that you forgive yourself for your sins and for all that you do; every crime, every kill, even your very existence.
…Who are those people? Because that seems a little too easy. If it was that simple, everyone would be pure. But because no one is pure- it must be something else.
Humans are fickle creatures, and I hate myself for being one.
"Young Master."
They build you up, only to break you down. Suffocating you in their opinions, plans and beliefs- shredding all lines of hope and light in your world- just to have things their way.
They complain, and cry, and whine, yell, kill, and murder-to receive what they want. And everything they want- they want for themselves.
Who would want to be around them?
"Young master…?"
They lie. As you sit in the palms of their hands, innocent and unknowing, they morph you. They tell you everything is all right and you're where you want to be.
But you're never where you want to be. Ever.
Fabrication. Some things can never be true. And some things- you really, desperately wish they weren't.
I can say I'm not a liar… and that everyday I embrace truth with welcoming arms. But if I were to embrace all of the truth- I wouldn't be sitting here.
I live off of lies.
My lies are what make me. They are what break me- what take me in and forsake me, but my truths will destroy me.
A lie is the easiest of evils to pick up, and the hardest of habits to drop.
Who said we had to drop them…?
"Young Master! I advise you stop daydreaming and come back to reality for a moment." A low voice uttered.
The voice reverberated in my empty soul. It was a tone of truth and trust; but also that of selfishness and animosity. It was velvety smooth, dipped in a thick gloss of decadence.
It was trap- and I knew that.
And that's exactly why I was drawn to it- it filled my emptiness with a vindictive warmth.
This voice was only that of a mere butler… a mere butler…with a secret.
We humans claim ourselves to be perfect. Everything we make, do and say is supposedly flawless. To be continuous and ever changing.
But, because we are ever changing- we cannot be perfect. We grow, and speak, and contain much emotion. We cannot be perfect- we must not be perfect.
For when we are perfect… we will have reached the end of our existence.
Will our faithful angels save us then?
"And who are you to inform…?" I grinned cockily as I rested my small face upon my right palm. I shifted in my arm chair to switch which legs were crossed.
The gorgeous man before me bowed slightly- tresses of soul black hair slipping into his line of view.
Crimson iris' disappeared under translucent eye lids. "I apologize, my lord, but your tea is ready." He remained in his bowing position.
I snorted. "Not my question."
I've never been one to believe in God. He's never helped me before- even in the most disgustingly inconsolable circumstances. His existence to me…has never been proved.
So why should I believe in his servants?
Glancing up, the tall man sighed. Lowering himself down on one knee, with his right palm just touching his left chest he grinned evilly.
Amusing how he pledged over a heart which he did not have.
"I am but a humble servant of Ciel Phantomhive, head of the Phantomhive family. I am to always remain by his side- and I always shall." He waited for my approval.
I frowned. "Well, until the end anyway…"
There is only one being on this planet that I'd ever consider close to an angel….and yet he's the farthest thing from it.
Sebastian stood up, his face forming into a down turned line, but turned around to pour my tea. His lean body was graced with a ray of sunlight- no. He was the one gracing the sunlight. His black tailed coat hung snug on his frame. His dark hair in a mess- but that's only one more thing to add to his beauty. That- and his eyes.
His magnifying, seductive eyes. They were like never ending pools of blood…sin…and hate…. But…
There was something else in there.. I can't quite put my finger on it…
"I will be with you even after the end, my lord. Long after." he whimsically added while placing my tea in front of me- swiftly moving aside any and all of the paper work I left unfinished.
I guess even the devil can lie. He'll deceive you until the day you die- because when you reach his world, nothing can stop him there.
You'll fall into his fire and burn for the sins you've committed. You have to watch out though, you might mistake his attention for care.
"Today's tea is Earl-"
"Everything has to have an end, Sebastian. That's just how it goes."
My butler smiled malevolently. "And by who's standards are you going by my lord…hmmm…?"
"No one's. it's just the rules of life." he nodded.
"Ahhh… I see. But, my very existence defies those 'rules of life,' and if I may be so rude to say, you're never one to follow the rules… are you Young Master…? Therefore, you can be so pleased believing that I'll forever remain beside you. Whether it is true or not, you must know you thrive on the fact of it." His subdued voice threatened to overthrow my boundaries.
"…shut up Sebastian." Blushing, I took a sip of my tea.
Perfect- but nothing less is expected.
"Yes, my lord." He bowed once again, a pleased smile plastered upon his lips. With his back turned he left the room of my study. The light through the curtains he had opened haloed around him. The sparkling aura formed an pair of what-oddly enough-resembled…wings.
I would have chuckled if I hadn't known he would have questioned my laughter.
I couldn't help but think his devious grin went well with the feathery limbs.
He's an angel in disguise and I don't even know his name…
You know- God doesn't have wings himself… Even when the Devil has them.
end.
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