I Want My Innocence Back
By SMYGO4EVA
His eyes…..
The demon's eyes….
A sunless sky…
They were like the sky during an eclipse….
Dark…
Dark blue….
A vague hint of the malevolent amethyst….
He was satiated.
That much she knew.
He was satiated with her.
He took her.
He took her innocence.
And he never wanted to give it back to her….
She knew this and it tore her up from the inside out, as if she deserved this punishment. It was as if she had done something wrong and she had the right to be punished. When the demon took her brother away from her, her friends, disappearing in front of her very eyes, she felt a hollowness grow inside her.
A hollowness that seemed to grow with every turn.
A hollowness that ate her insides, ate them in bite-size pieces, relishing ever morsel.
A hollowness that made her feel complete.
Complete.
Oh so complete.
He held her against him, feeling the arousal growing into full fruition. She knew his full intention in the pit of her stomach, and she knew that it couldn't be helped, nor would it be avoided.
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
That thought was all that was running through her mind at that particular moment. She didn't want this. She didn't want this.
She didn't.
She didn't.
Didn't she?
It was too much, too soon, too abrupt to tell.
She was a good girl, she knew she was.
She didn't break one rule as a child.
She tried her best to be everyone's golden girl, the one they could depend on to be good.
Good.
Good.
Did…she…want to be good forever?
No.
No she didn't.
She didn't want to be seen as a goody two-shoes anymore.
No.
She wanted to break the rules.
For now.
If she could, she would enjoy it.
Enjoy being deflowered.
Show the whole world that she didn't want to be pure anymore.
Show that she can be corrupted.
So she did.
She became corrupted.
She let him deflower her.
Let his long tongue slide on her pale neck.
She voiced her pleasure.
He growled in approval.
Deep, baritone, smooth, throaty growl…
Rich in tone akin to a cello…
Her voice was a violin….
There was a black symphony that strung itself in the air just then, filled with the strings of the cello and the violin melding into one song of hell.
It would be one song that would not cease its twists and turns, a never-ending cycle for the two of them.
Never-ending.
Never changing.
In the end, they would give in to their own warped, intertwined desires.
Innocence lost.
Desire gained.
It looks like roles do change after all.
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
But….
White…
She saw white….
The color for purity….
She was enveloped in white….
She was still….
Pure….
She was still pure….
She was still pure…
She was still pure….
She wanted…
She wanted….
She wanted….
Something to feel.
Something to abandon.
She wanted to feel something without worrying about the (imagined) repercussions.
She wanted to feel something.
Something.
Anything.
She didn't want to worry if something was right or wrong.
She wanted to feel carefree, go about life with abandon and little worries.
She wanted to be.
She wanted to be.
She wanted to be.
She wanted to just be.
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
Now the demon was taking her….
Taking her!!
Now she didn't want this…
Not anymore…
The pleasure became painful there...
She didn't to do this anymore.
Not now.
Not then.
Not ever again!
She wanted to let set free from his corruption.
She wanted to be pure.
She wanted to be innocent again.
She knew that this was inevitable.
For purity to be washed away by the tainted waters.
For it to be burned away by flames of sin.
Of indulgence.
Of sadomasochistic yearning for punishment.
The acts of repentance…
The act of atonement…
She yearned for those…
But it was too late…
She was unclean.
Corrupted by the demon.
Tainted.
She beckoned his sensuous touches.
His voice…
Deep, resonating pulses…
The deepest, richest tone on a cello….
His silk lips…
His staccato laugh….
His muscular form…
The way he would lick his lips seductively…
The eyes….
His eyes….
Rich in amethyst….
Mirroring a sunless sky….
Dark, red and violet…
Mirroring an eclipse…
An eclipse of his soul…
And her own….
Blood dripped on her cheek...
And he licked it off…
She kissed his lips…
And he would slink his tongue into her mouth…
She would beckon him to her…
Even if she didn't want him….
And he would take her then and there…
It was an endless cycle…
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
A cycle of hollow joy and vicious self-hatred…
She let him take her purity….
And he never wanted to let her go…
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
Her soul had gone from white to black….
Shiro no kuro….
She was never going to get what she once had….
There was no way….
She gave it to him…
Her innocence…
What was important to her…
No matter how much she wanted it back….
She couldn't have it…
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
Her innocence…
Taken by the demon…
Taken by him…
She would never have it back…
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
Did she want to give her purity to a demon?
Yes.
She would never get it back.
Even if she pleaded.
Even if she begged on her hands and knees.
She would never have it back.
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
I want my innocence back
(I want my innocence back)
(A/N: I got inspiration from the song "I Want My Innocence Back" by Emilie Autumn (hence the title) and my twisted scenarios with Marik and Serenity, how they tied in with Schön. Read and review!)