A/N: Hey! Sorry I haven't been in a writing mood lately. I've been watching Doctor Who, Firefly, and Torchwood :D So I'm just gonna say that the end of this story went in a different direction than I planned. Oh well! Sometimes you just can't control what the characters are going to do. But I really like this story and I actually almost had a few tears while writing it. I hope you enjoy and please send me a review or a message and tell me what you think. I cherish all of your opinions. Love ya!

Castiel always had trouble sleeping. Every night he went through the same chain of events: take a sleeping pill when the rest of his family went to sleep (although the pills never worked), sit on Tumblr until his eyes felt like sandpaper, lie in the dark for hours until someone feels merciful enough to let him sleep. He would wake up a few hours later and go through his day with most people clueless about his torturous nightly ritual.


From: Dean the Love Machine

Hey Cas! What's up?

From: Future Castiel Winchester

Dean, how many times are you going to change your name in my phone? This is getting ridiculous.

From: Dean the Love Machine

Until you keep it. :P Besides, it's funny! Everyone in my phone has a weird name like that.

From: Future Castiel Winchester

Oh yeah? What's mine? That weird kid next door?

From: Future Castiel Winchester

It's been 10 minutes and you haven't replied. That's not suspicious at all, Winchester.

From: Dean the Love Machine

I'm not gonna tell you what your name is! It's a secret for my eyes only!

From: Future Castiel Winchester

You sound like a little girl.

From: Dean the Love Machine

Well maybe I am!

From: Dean the Love Machine

It's boring over here. I'm coming over.

Cas didn't even bother coming out of his room to wait for his best friend. It would take Dean about 30 seconds to find a change of clothes and walk to his house. Well...it was more like 33 seconds. He timed it about three years ago. Cas could see Dean walk to the door from his window and smiled when he heard, "Mom, Dad, I'm hoooome!"

"Honey, I'm home," Dean trilled as he burst through Cas's bedroom door. Cas rolled his eyes and, without looking away from the book he was reading, said, "If I didn't know any better I'd say you were gay." The other boy chuckled and said, "Only for you, baby." There was no way in hell Cas would ever admit how much he wished that statement were true.

Dean threw his stuff into a corner and flopped down in the middle of the bed. The room was quiet for a few minutes before Cas said, "I really don't know why you come over here when you're bored. My house is not very exciting." Dean replied with as much nonchalance as he could muster, "Because I love you."

Cas turned around in his seat and saw Dean sprawled out on his bed with his hands behind his head. He really tried to keep his eyes on Dean's face, but they trailed to the little strip of skin that was showing from where his shirt was riding up. The skin was a beautiful golden color and he could just barely see a little tuft of hair poking out of the waistband of his dark jeans. He fought the urge to drool.

If I don't get out of this room, Cas thought, I will probably say or do something that I'll regret later. He went to his dresser and pulled out a pair of boxers and some pajama pants. He looked over at the body on his bed.

"I'm gonna go take a shower."

"Yep."

"Is there any chance you'll move from that spot while I'm gone?"

"Nope."

Castiel rolled his eyes and walked out the door, breathing a deep sigh of relief once it clicked shut. I padded down the hall to the bathroom and started running the water for his shower. He pulled off his clothes layer by layer until he saw only his naked form in the mirror. He stared into his own electric blue eyes and thought, what the hell am I doing pining over my best friend? I must be the biggest idiot in the world. There is no way that Dean could even possibly have any feelings for me.


When the bedroom door clicked home Dean's eyes shot open, his body more alert than ever before. It was time to put Operation: Finally Admit That I'm In Love With Cas into action. As the sound of water running could be heard from the bathroom, Dean jumped off the bed and sprinted towards Castiel's computer. His fingers glided over the keyboard as he entered the password that Cas had kept for a couple years at least. Mistake Number 1: Change your password every once in a while. Dean thought with a smirk on his face.

He glanced at the clock and quickly got on the internet. He pulled up Cas's Tumblr dash and smirked again. Mistake Numero 2: The logout button is there for a reason. He easily maneuvered to Cas's blog and found exactly what he was looking for in the most recent post. Someone by the name of trickydicksp8ismyhomeboy (what the hell kind of name is that?) had asked, "What's your crush like?" Cas answered with a picture of the two of them that had been taken a couple of weeks ago at Dean's birthday party. He smiled fondly at the look of pure joy on his best friend's face. He scrolled past the picture and read what Cas had written.

"Dean and I have known each other for years...it feels like forever. He is the most wonderful person and I could never ask for a more perfect friend. He has this side that he shows to the public where he is tough and manly and he hides his emotions because he doesn't want to seem weak but when he's around me he's like a totally different person. He's caring and funny and I've even seen him cry a couple of times. It's like he only saves this side of himself for me.

He has this smile that lights up the whole room and melts my heart into a puddle of goo. I love the way his eyes sparkle when he laughs. And you have no idea how long I've wanted to kiss those beautiful lips of his...And don't even get me started on his body. *faints*

As I'm writing this, I'm also texting him and I can tell that he's probably bored and wants to come over. I wonder how long I can last in the same room as he before I escape to take a shower. Hmmm...maybe tonight will be the night that I finally tell him that I love him. I'll probably get too scared but I think I'm gonna do it! Wish me luck!"

Dean's whole body was shaking and his heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. Cas's confession was so pure and full of love that it almost brought him to tears. Right then Dean knew that tonight everything was going to change.


Cas shut the water off and toweled his body dry before roughly drying his dark hair. He pulled on his boxers and then his pajama pants and finally downed a sleeping pill before making his way back to his room. He walked in to find Dean still lying on his bed but this time wearing a pair of gym shorts and no shirt. Cas quickly averted his eyes and threw his towel on the back of his desk chair. He felt heat rising to his cheeks and tried his best to will the blush away. That's not even fair! It's like he's flaunting that perfectly lickable body of his! Okay Cas, you can handle this. Just don't embarrass yourself.

He calmly sat down at his desk and opened his computer. He needed something to distract himself. "Aw come on! It's like you don't even wanna be near me! It wouldn't kill you to sit on the bed, you know," Dean said. Cas turned and said, "God, Dean could you sound any more like a whiny little girl? I'm expecting you to start flailing your limbs in a raging temper tantrum any minute now." Dean sat up and smirked, "That actually sounds kinda fun. I wonder if it would be better to do it on the bed or the floor...the tantrum, I mean." Cas could've sworn he died when Dean winked at him. Oh we could do it on a bed of nails and it would be the best thing ever!

Cas sighed and picked up his computer and moved to his spot on the bed. He sat against the headboard with his computer on his lap. Dean scooted up until he was lying beside him on his side with his head propped up looking every bit like a model. Dean watched Cas intently while he scrolled through his dash, Cas being very careful not to post anything incriminating while Dean was watching.

After a few minutes of silence Dean asked, "So, still having trouble sleeping?" Cas simply nodded, not knowing what to say. "Maybe it's because you stay on the computer instead of actually trying to sleep," Dean suggested. Cas shook his head and said, "Dean, I've tried staying off the computer. It doesn't help. Nothing helps. These stupid fucking pills don't even help. It's like the damn universe doesn't want me to have a peaceful night's sleep."

"Maybe you're lonely," Dean said after a few moments. He said it so quietly that Cas almost didn't catch it. He thought for a minute before getting up and putting his computer on the desk and turning out the light, leaving the room lit only by the light of the moon streaming in through the window. He got back on the bed and lied in the same position as the other boy. "Dean," Cas started, feeling butterflies starting to flutter in his stomach, "if loneliness was the case, then I would be able to sleep well every time you were here."

Neither boy said anything; both too scared to say the wrong thing. Dean finally spoke up, his voice just a whisper, "I wasn't talking about that kind of lonely." Cas looked into the deep green eyes of the boy he had fallen in love with and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He felt like his heart was about to beat out of his chest. Dean looked around the room for a moment before slowly reaching over and lacing the fingers of his free hand with Castiel's. He brought their joined hands to his lips and placed a small kiss to Cas's knuckles before clutching their hands to his chest.

Cas felt his face burn hot and his entire body shut down when those lips made contact with his skin. Is this really happening? He mind was so jumbled that he almost missed Dean's next words. "Cas...I uh...I love you. I've been in love with you for years but I was too scared to say anything. When I finally realized it, I freaked out because I thought I was gay and it scared the shit out of me. Then I realized that it's only you. You are the only guy I will ever love. There isn't a single person on this planet that can hold a candle to how perfect you are to me. I never thought I'd ask this but with you, it's the only thing that's right. Cas, will you be my boyfriend?"

Cas didn't realize that he was crying until he felt Dean cup his cheek and wipe a tear with his thumb. He lifted his hand and placed it on top of Dean's, "Dean…" He broke off, knowing what his heart was begging to say but having no idea how to word it. Instead, he leaned forward and placed the tenderest kiss upon the other boy's lips. He poured out every emotion he felt in that moment into that kiss: joy, want, need, longing, and love and love and LOVE. He kissed him until they both had tears running down their faces and they couldn't breathe.

Neither of them said a word as Dean pulled Cas close and wrapped his arms around him. They both held on as tight as they could, both boys scared that the other would disappear if they let go for just a second. Cas lifted his head up and looked his Dean in the eyes and quietly said, "I love you, too." They shared another sweet kiss and Cas buried his head in Dean's neck. He nuzzled and took in the smell that was so undeniably Dean and placed a few small kisses along his neck.

Dean held Cas in his arms for the rest of the night, both of them losing consciousness not long after their shared confessions. That night, Cas slept. He slept better than he had ever slept in his life. Dean was right. Loneliness was the problem and love, the solution. After that night, Cas never had trouble sleeping again. He threw away the pills and never used them again. Even on the nights when he slept alone, he was never lonely. Dean always called him before he went to sleep and just knowing that he was right there was enough for him.

Castiel always had trouble sleeping and three little words fixed it all. "I love you."


Another A/N: The Tumblr url is totally mine...just in case you were wondering