Shigeki no Catchphrase – Thoughts of characters. Absolutely plotless. Slight spoilers for manga.

Warnings: utter pointlessness conjured up on temporary writer's block.

Eren – I will kill the Titans! Every last one of them! Except me, of course.

Mikasa – I will protect Eren whether he likes it or not. And then I will sleep with him. Whether he likes it or not.

Armin – I am fated to associate with idiots. But their psychotic ways have actually kind of grown on me.

Jean – I'll just calmly wipe my faith in humanity on an idiot's back.

Sasha – Despite common opinion, I enjoy other things than potatoes. Like bread. And cheese. And meat. Any meat. I'm really not picky. You should be worried.

Connie – I can't hear anyone over the sound of my own awesomeness. I mean, Titans? The fuck are those?

Reiner – I'm strong and ripped, but no one really recognizes me over Mikasa's badassery. So I'll just destroy mankind in retaliation.

Bertholt – I'll follow my warrior friend to the ends of the earth! And then hopefully get in Annie's pants.

Ymir – I don't give a fuck what you think, my Krista is awesome in bed. Keep your dick to yourself, Reiner, cause I've got a fucking angel.

Krista – I will be recognized as more than an abandoned noble! (And also more than Ymir's sex slave!)

Annie – Is a peaceful life after destroying Mankind really too much to ask for? And Bertholt? Seriously? I'm half his size, there's no way we could do any of the interesting stuff.

Hanji – I had sex with Commander Levi once. But he left me when I called Bean's name while climaxing. Ah well, can't be helped if he doesn't recognize the extent of my love. For Bean, that is.

Levi – You! You're dirty! I don't give a fuck if you're scuffed from fighting Titans, I will clean you all! I will fucking clean you, dammit!

Erwin – I try not to associate with the idiots that call themselves the Scouting Legion. Instead, I associate with Levi, and he associates with said idiots. I've trained this man well.

Hanji's refers to an SnK fic I read once, called 'Intimacy'. I highly recommend it. It's hilarious.