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Chapter 1

*Langley Falls, Virginia*

It was a nice sunny day on Cherry Street, all the kids where at school and adults working. There had been some construction for a new house the past few months, but the finishing touches had been placed on the exterior, many wondered who could be moving in. But most left that as something to just wait and see. The few people still at home where in a two story yellow house that had a flagpole on its front yard. Two of the occupants of the house where in the Attic, on a large goldfish in a bowl by the window ledge, the other was a short large headed grey skinned alien who was mindlessly flipping through the channels of the TV as it layed on the couch.

The alien gave a heavy sigh that turned into a yawned. "Oh, GGOODD! Why the hell is everything got to be so boring nowadays?" the Alien says, turning off the TV and sitting up with a margarita in its hand. "I mean really, you'd think someone would've at least have some brains or talent to make something interesting."

"Easy Roger, you're just getting a little antsy." the Fish says with a heavy German accent, shifting around in his bowl to look out the window. "You just need to get out more, have some fun around town, go to the beach for some sun. Something other than sitting around here."

"You think I don't know that, Klaus?! The problem is that this town is boring as you." Roger says to the goldfish, jumping to his feet and chugging the margarita in one gulp before going to make a new one. "Nothing exciting happens unless it is caused or after Stan, Steve, or even Hayley and Franny."

Walking over to the bar he had built just for himself, bored as he quickly made a new drink. As Roger was shaking his margarita Klaus saw a large moving truck passing the house, driving up the street with a dark blue Margaret Vaguester following right behind it. "Well I think we may have something new happening. Someone seems to be moving in up the road."

This gets Roger's attention as he walked up behind Klaus, just catching the car as the two vehicles continued up to the way closer to the beach. "Well, helloooooo. Looks like we've got a new rich neighbors moving in up the hill." Roger says before giving a heavy sigh, " Knowing Frannie then she'll want to have a welcoming party, and I sure as hell don't want Stan scaring off a possible stud. I mean look at the car, anyone who has one is either dragging on the ground or smaller than a pinky."

"How do you know it's not a woman driving?" Klaus says, shifting back to his alien friend.

"Please, I have a sense about this type of thing. Trust me, it's a dude driving." Roger says, smirking as he quickly downed the new margarita. "Now the only real question is: What to wear?"


(Downstairs a few minutes later)


Francine Smith was humming softly as she vacuumed the living room carpet, almost mindlessly cleaning the house. Till she heard a loud crash coming down the stairs, making her stop and turn to see Roger, wearing a black pompadour like wig, dressed in a pair of blue jeans, green sweater over a light blue button up, and a pair of dark brown shoes. Falling down the stairs and landing on his face at the bottom before popping up and adjusting his outfit and hair.

"Oh, hey Roger. Going somewhere?" Francine asked, stopping her cleaning and wrapping up the cord.

"Oh you bet, some truck went up the road. So, I'm going over to introduce myself before Staniel does something to botch any chance of a good relationship with them."

"Ooooo, you mean to the house they've been building for the past three months? I wasn't expecting them to move in till next week"

"Yeah, but then again it was a big truck passing by. Or at least that's what Klaus said, I just saw the beast of a car they were driving and OOOOHHH MMMYYY GOOODDDD! It was incredible, top of the line Vaguester!" Roger says, practically dancing.

"Really? Well I suppose we could go and at least greet them to the neighborhood. Especially try and make a good impression before Stan messes this up. Remember the prison camp he made out of backyard for the Memari's?"

"Oh GOD! Talk about a big retarded racist moment. So you can at least understand why I want to cut the turd off before he scares them away." Roger says, placing both hands on his hips as he rolled his eyes. "Last thing I need is Staniel having another episode. So finish up and I'll be in the car wait for you, then we'll go and meet the new guy~." He finished, giving his hips a wiggle and a smirk before walking out the front door.

Francine simply shook her head as she smiled, she almost let out a giggle as he rushed to the car, falling on his stomach before jumping up again and getting in her red sudan. It had almost been two weeks since he left the house, so she could understand why he was so excited. Truth be told she kinda was as well, things were getting so boring around the house and nothing interesting happened unless it was cause of Stan or Steve. So to meet someone entirely new person was exciting to her.

Setting the vacuum against the wall and out of the way before she followed after Roger, seeing her alien friend cleaning off his sweater and adjusting his hair. As Francine opened the door Roger looked to her, practically vibrating in his seat. "Come on, Frannie. I don't know about you, but I want to look my best for this." He says before looking at his teeth in the mirror.

"What do you mean?" Francine asked, sending a glare to Roger as he looked back at her.

"I mean look at you, you look like a senile grannies pillow from the mental ward, You could at least class it up or wear something good." Roger says, gesturing to her pink and white frilly dress. "You could at least show some skin or something that tells them you don't go to the free table at church for someone's throwaways."

"Roger! I've got better fashion sense than to take from a free table." Francine says, giving a huff as she rolled her eyes. Shaking her head and starting the car as she did.

It was maybe a fifteen or twenty minute drive down the road. Francine sending a glare to Roger, who was still fussing over his outfit and changed mid drive to a tight black dress with a pair of matching high heels, showing his legs and plenty of his fake breasts as he put the wig into a bun that had a few curls hanging free behind his head amd around his ears. "See, Frannie? This is how you make a first impression."

"Then why didn't you come down in that outfit?!"

"Because, I was going for a classy friend meeting. But since you didn't even bother looking decent I have make it up for you." Roger says, rolling his eyes now as he fixed his hair. Making Francine roll her eyes as she kept diving.


The past few months where a long wait, but it was worth it to see his new home now finished. Most of the furniture was placed in the proper room he envisioned for them when he first designed the layout of his new home. It was difficult to find a nice quiet place to settle down and work in peace, even if it was just for a little while. Currently he was laying on his back, taking apart the pipe to his kitchen sink to check a leak. One of the guys either made a mistake or was trying to be cheap when he was off packing everything to move here.

No matter, it wasn't too difficult for him to repair on his own. Just needed to use some of the leftover construction supplies he had them leave in the basement just incase something like this happened. Around him was the swivel p-trap, drain elbow, and a part of the pipe and coupling itself that connected to the basement waste line. Two containers of cleaner and rubber cement nearby as he was cleaning the pipes under the sink.

He was so focused on fixing the sink he almost jumped when he heard the doorbell ring, his knee jerking and knocking one of the cans over before it began to roll away. "God damn it." He muttered. "Come in the doors unlocked." he said placing the rag he used to clean the pipe down.

As he began to move off of his back, in came a beautiful long blonde haired woman in a pink dress that clung to her body that matched her pink high heels and a golden locket around her neck. After her was a shorter grey skinned . . . woman, though he was hesitant to use the word with the alien appearance. Wearing a revealing black dress with 'her' hair done into a bun.

The appearance of the two together was rather strange, but he put it out of his mind for now. Giving a small wave as he smiled at them. "Morning, I wasn't expecting anyone to drop by. At least not so soon after I just moved in." He says, giving a chuckle as he stood.

"I'm sorry, my friend-" The blonde said before being interrupted by the grey skinned one.

"Miranda, I saw your truck and BEAST of a car passing by our house and just had to meet you." 'She' said, clearly trying to be flirty as 'she' pushed 'her' chest out. "And I must say I'm not disappointed."

The blonde rolled her eyes before walking closer, "I'm sorry about her, she can be a bit annoying in she doesn't get her way. I'm Francine, Francine Smith. Nice to meet you." She said, holding out her hand with a smile.

"Nice to meet you as well, my name is David." He said, shaking her hand before looking at the sink again. "Sorry, I'm dealing with some problems with the pipes. Still trying to get everything in order before I started meeting people."

"Ohhh, quite the handyman huh? I think I might have to hire you." 'Miranda' says, smirking as 'she' looked him over.

"Hehe, I'll have to pass. I have enough trouble with work right now." David said, rubbing the back of his head as he chuckled. "I should probably finish them up, before I forget about them and turn the water back on."

"Well how about I help you? We did after all interrupt you before you finished." Francine said.

"Well I'm almost done, just need to glue them together and put them in place again. It shouldn't take too long."

"Well I'd still like to help out, even if it's only a little bit."

"Well, I suppose I could use a bit of help." David says as he turned and started back to the sink. "I just need to finish cleaning the pipes first. Francine, could you please get the Rubber Cement? It rolled away from me when you guys knocked. Miranda, please go down to the basement and turn on the water in . . . five to ten minutes? I should be done by then, it just across from the bottom of the stair of the other side of the basement. There will be a clear path to it."

Francine nodded with a smile as 'Miranda' scowled, giving a huff before she opened the basement door and started down. "You mean this bottle here?" Francine asked going over to the container against the wall as David laid down on his back again.

"Yeah that's it, grab it and I'll be finished with this." David says, grabbing the drain elbow. As he did he saw Francine bend over to grab the bottle. Her dress clinging to her plump round ass and giving him a clear impression of her body. His face was covered in a blush and his throat dried up like he was in a desert.

Averting his eyes as she picked up the bottle and turned back to him, bringing the bottle over with a smile. Not knowing she all but flashed him as she handed him the rubber cement. "Here. Never seen how someone repairs their plumbing, mostly called a repair man or let Stan take care of it."

"It's not that hard. Just need some practice and to understand each part. The rubber cement will seal up any leaks, though it seems either someone forgot or a new guy was incharge of this part of building my house." David said, giving each part a coating on the inside before piecing the piping back together. "There, now we only need to wait for your friend to turn the water back on."

"Might take a while, 'she' seemed more interested in getting to know you."

"Well, I could talk to you while we wait. You were talking about someone named: Stan? He your son? Boyfriend?"

"He's my husband, more often than not he's out at work while I tend to the house and our kids are at school."

"Husband and kids? Forgive me for thinking this, but you look rather young to have two kid." David said, this time Francine getting a dusting of blush as she turned her head away. Placing her hand on her cheek as she giggled.

"Thank you, sometimes I feel like I'm starting to become a little old."

"Nonsense, you look like you just got into you twenties." he says, making her blush now red as she tried to hide her face.


"Rat bastard, sending me down here. Why the hell wasn't he head over heels for my sexy ass body. I mean come on, I've got twice as much sex appeal as Franny." Roger says, trying to keep his balance as he made his way down in his wedges. Reaching the bottom of the stairs as he started looking for a lightswitch.

Seeing the lights flip on a second later to see shelves lining the walls of the basement. Each of them full of old poster rolled up and put into boxes next to guitars, many book and old electronics as well as parts from plumbing to electrical work. At the far end past it all was the water tank.

"Jeez, Stan's basement is a shit show compared to this. Look at all this, Aerosmith, Motley Crue, Ozzy Osbourne. This guy loves his music." Roger says, taking a poster out of one of the boxes. "He's even a signed poster of AC/DC before Bon Scott died."

Roger then rolled it back up and placed the poster back before starting to move along, only stopping when he saw part of a picture of a guy that looked like David. Lifting up a magazine to see him holding a guitar and on stage with three others on one side, him at a stove in a chefs uniform on the other, as a third picture of him at a desk down the center. "No . . . fucking . . . way, he decided to move in here of all places?" Roger asked, placing it back down. "Why the hell would he chose a shit hole like this?! Now he's our neighbor . . . and is upstairs alone with Franny." He thought aloud before a smirk slowly began to form on his face. "Well, I think I may have just found some entertainment and maybe a way to piss Staniel at the same time."


Back upstairs Francine and David continued talking, David himself laughing as she told him some of her families funnier moments, mainly those Stan caused and had to fix. Francine herself was ecstatic, It was fun to have someone new to talk to and share stories with. It made her feel like she was young as she giggled and laughed with her new neighbor. But one thing nagged at the back of her mind, 'What his full name was?', and Francine was about to ask him that very question. Only to be interrupted by the rattling of the pipes before the faucet sprayed out water.

Without a word David walked over and crouched down under the sink. His eyes locked on the drain pipe. "Well looks like the seal is holding. I'll keep an eye on it for now, but I believe it should be fine now." He said as a small smile formed on his lips.

"Well I'm glad we could help, even if it was only a little." Francine says, giving a small smile herself as David stood once again and turn towards her. When from the stairs came the sound of rushing footsteps as 'Miranda' all but jumped towards Francine and grabbed her by the arm.

"Come on, Franny! I need to talk to you about something!" 'Miranda' says as she began to drag Francine away.

"Rog- Miranda! What's wrong with you?!"

"LET THE MAN HAVE HIS TIME TO FINISH MOVING IN!" Roger yelled as he pulled harder.

"Truth be told, I've got most of my things already put away, thanks to the moving crew. Only needed to fix the crappy job done on the sink." David said, raising an eyebrow in confusion as he watched the two.

"My shows are coming on and we're done here. We need to be heading out, NOW!" Roger said, opening the door behind him.

"Umm, well . . . if you two want to come back I'm having a party here in two week or so. Feel free to come by then or whenever you two wish to talk." David said as 'Miranda' pulled Francine out of the house and pushed he towards the car.