Life on Mars
Ashes to Ashes alternate ending, in which the dark ritual was not performed; Adeline didn't even mention it to Alistair in this rendition. I'm trying for a different style for this piece; increasing the narrative distance to reflect how alienated and far-away from everything Adeline feels. I was actually reading Joan Didion's "The Year of Magical Thinking" at the time that I wrote this – I thought it was rather ironic, and appropriate.
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"Adeline, I love you"
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The sky churned and boiled red above, red as blood. The world was utterly silent for a few heartbeats, and then a piercing, bloodcurdling wail echoed hauntingly through the entirety of Denerim. Soldiers stared up at Fort Drakon at the shriek, and tears welled in their eyes – they didn't know why they wept, but felt as if their hearts were being wrenched from their bodies as the wail echoed into the dying sunset. Only moments before, they had seen a column of white light erupt from the top of the fort, and a great, shuddering explosion, and now nothing but that terrible, chilling wail.
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The funeral was held a few days after Denerim had been cleared of the darkspawn. The king's companions and soldiers wore black, but the Warden-Commander remained in her armor, still covered in the blackened blood of the archdemon – it remained on her, a stain on her being. A stain on her soul. She hadn't eaten, slept, or spoken in days.
Quiet speeches were given by those who knew Alistair, both as a friend, and as family. The Warden-Commander was silent. She knelt by the king's side and rested her head on his still chest, closing her eyes and remaining there throughout the entire service.
No one disturbed her as the attendants left, and her companions held a vigil.
She was a ghost; a flitting shadow of death among the living.
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The Landsmeet was called again to determine the next successor – Anora had died when her tower had been struck by the archdemon. The nobility looked to Eamon, who relented, but insisted that he remain regent until a proper heir was elected. Many looked to the surviving Couslands to take the throne.
Fergus Cousland became king, and left the Teyrnir of Gwaren to Roland Gilmore.
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The Orlesian Wardens relieved Adeline of her duty – she would not serve as Warden-Commander in her current state. She could not. She had not spoken a word since confronting the archdemon. She slept little, and ate little. Those around her saw a hollow shell of what once was.
She became moody and belligerent, taking to drink more and more until someone had found her collapsed in a gutter, barely breathing and choking on her own vomit. She was only saved when the guard who spotted her recognized the Grey Warden amulet she wore.
She threw the amulet into the sea.
She did not want to be saved.
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Aedan brought her to Highever, where Adeline oversaw the construction of a monument in honor of all the Grey Wardens who fell at Ostagar, and for Riordan and Alistair. In the months it took to build, she came alive once more, pouring her being into overseeing the project. She still did not speak, but Aedan could see that her eyes yet held light – she needed to see this through. He knew she wanted to die – this was her final task, and so he helped the woman in any way he could.
At the base of the monument, in a chest that would be sealed with magic, Adeline placed the treaties and Alistair's blade and shield, laying her own blade alongside his. She gave Aedan the key to the chest, and had Selina enchant it so that only a Grey Warden could open it.
Carved upon the chest were the words 'Within lie the blades that have slain a God. Use them, Grey Wardens, but beware their cost.'
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The monument was finished a year after the Battle of Denerim. Adeline stared up at the tall, proud statue of the grand griffon, with the names of all the fallen Grey Wardens carved down the sides of the pedestal where the beast sat, the sealed chest resting between its paws. At the top of the list were the words:
'Here lies Alistair Theirin, slayer of the fifth archdemon, Urthemiel, and last king of Calenhad's line'
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Adeline walked through the darkness of the summer night, the salty air running soft fingers through her hair as a breeze picked up. She stood by the sea cliffs, closing her eyes and clasping her hands together, speaking for the first time since Alistair's death.
Hahren na melana sahlin
emma ir abelas
souver'inan isala hamin
vhenan him dor'felas
in uthenera na revas
vir sulahn'nehn
vir dirthera
vir samahl la numin
vir lath sa'vunin
The words echoed off the tall cliffs and crags that ran along the shore as the sea whispered softly, and the waves gently lapped at the sand. Adeline lay wrapped in her plaid muffler at the base of the Grey Warden's monument, draining the entire bottle of sleeping draught and closing her eyes as she nestled into the shadow's embrace.
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"Alistair…I'll find you"
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