*The usual disclaimers. I don't own them. Wish I did.

Happy 50th Anniversary Lancer.

** Thanks to Alice Marie and Susan for doing the Beta.

...

BLACK MESA

BY SandySha

Episode tag: Chase A Wild Horse

A continuation of Taming a Wild Horse by SandySha

...********

Murdoch waited outside the hacienda looking toward the arch. It was close to noon, and he knew the work crews would be coming in soon for lunch. Finally, he saw Frank's crew making their way toward the yard. He anxiously watched as the men got closer. He didn't see the golden palomino he had expected to see.

As the men dismounted and started to line up for noon chow, he tried to casually walk over to them.

"Frank," Murdoch drew the man's attention.

"Mr. Lancer," Frank responded. He knew that the boss was going to ask about his boy.

"I thought Johnny would be with you. Is he coming in?" Murdoch asked, hoping his voice didn't reflect the anxiety he was feeling.

"He's stayed out there, Mr. Lancer. Said he wasn't hungry and for the rest of us to go on. We left him still digging post holes," Frank answered.

"He was alright, wasn't he? I mean…" Murdoch asked, his face and voice now revealing the anxiety he was starting to feel.

Frank smiled, "Yeah, he was alright, Mr. Lancer."

Murdoch smiled.

He turned around and went to his horse. He was going to make sure everything was alright. He had hoped the boy would come in when the work crew did. Actually, he was disappointed when he hadn't been with Frank.

It had been two weeks since the incident with the Sam Stryker and his sons. Two weeks since Murdoch had ridden back from town with his son. He had hoped it was a good two weeks for Johnny. He had tried to make it a good two weeks.

He had made up his mind that day in the saloon that he wasn't going to push his son the way he had been. He had pushed Johnny hard those first two months. He had believed that by pushing, he would drive the wildness out of the boy.

What had he said that day in his study, "You have to make up your mind who you are, and where you belong and if it's not going to be here, I want to know it now."

What a fool he had been. In his mind, he was taming his wild son. He had been wrong. What he had done was shove the boy right out the front door and off of Lancer.

That day in the saloon he realized there was no separating Johnny Lancer from Johnny Madrid. He was going to have to accept both as his son, or neither.

For the past two weeks, he had been trying to get along with his son. He could tell Johnny had also been trying. They hadn't had a major blow up since that day. He knew the truce wouldn't last forever, but that was alright. He had his son home now and planned on keeping him.

When he had walked into the house, two weeks ago, with Johnny by his side, Scott had been over the moon. The two brothers were constantly together now. Constantly laughing. Constantly doing what brothers did, bonding. Murdoch wouldn't have it any other way.

Yes, Murdoch Lancer had a family again. It felt good to sit around the dinner table and watch his children talking and laughing.

However, always at the back of his mind was the fear that Johnny would grow restless and want to move on. Both he and Scott had seen the warning signs in the last few days. Johnny was growing restless again. They had both seen him staring off toward the mountains as if wanting to get on his horse and ride away.

He told Scott what he planned for the day, and his oldest son had agreed that it was a good plan. He hoped that by giving the boy some freedom every now and then, Johnny wouldn't feel the need to leave. He wanted Johnny to know that there was more to Lancer than digging post holes.

Murdoch rode over the rise and looked down at the line of posts and fencing the men worked on that day. At first, he wasn't sure Johnny was there. Then he smiled and sighed. He caught a glimpse of gold under a tall shade tree and a splash of red hanging on one of the fence posts near the end of the line of fencing. If Johnny's horse and shirt were there, then so was Johnny.

...********

Murdoch eased his way toward his son, a smile on his face. He was anxious to see the boy. He found that he missed being with his boys when they were away from him.

He was sure Johnny had seen him from a distance. He had watched as his son had taken his gloves off and then put his shirt on, tucking in his shirt tail. He felt uneasy as he watched Johnny turn his back to him.

As he got closer, he saw that his son had picked up a shovel again and went, half-heartedly, back to digging the hole he had been working on. Murdoch also noted Johnny hadn't put his gloves back on.

"Hey," Murdoch called out as he dismounted and walked to where Johnny was standing, coming face to face with his son. "I missed you when the rest of the work crew came in."

"Yeah, well, I… figured I'd pass up chow and get a little jump on the job," Johnny answered looking up at his father, who for some reason seemed taller than he normally was. It was then he realized Murdoch was standing on the high side of the gentle slope they were on.

"Nice day," Murdoch said with a smile, looking down at his son.

He wanted to spend the rest of the day with his youngest son. He knew what he was about to say should make him happy. At least, he hoped it would.

"Yeah," Johnny answered, less than enthusiastically, and turned his attention back to the hole he was digging.

"He's come to check on me," Johnny thought. "Why can't he just trust me?"

Murdoch noted the slight hesitation in Johnny's answer and saw a dark look flash across his son's face. He was suddenly afraid that what he was about to say would be rejected by the boy. That he would be rejected.

"I saw a stand of wild horses out by the Black Mesa this morning," Murdoch stated, keeping a smile on his face.

Johnny looked back up at his father, searching his face.

"What was the old man up to?" Johnny thought.

"How much longer do you think you're going to be working here?" Murdoch questioned, looking down at the half-dug hole.

"Well, I'm just gonna' lay out a string line," Johnny turned slightly and motioned toward the row of fence posts already standing. "That way it'll keep the crew busy until dark," Johnny answered with a slight hint of excitement.

"Good thinking," Murdoch agreed. He was proud that his son had thought ahead. He slowly moved to look at the line of fence posts already set.

He had rehearsed the next words. He hoped they came out right and that his son would take them the way they were meant.

Murdoch walked over to look at the row of fence posts already set.

"You know a man's life can be laid out like a row of post holes," he said as he picked up a post leaning against a nearby tree. He leaned on the post as he looked at his son. He was watching the slight smile on his son's face. All he could think was, "God, how he loved this boy."

"Sometimes, maybe that's not all good," he continued. "Maybe, there's a time a man has to listen to the sound of a faraway train whistle. Kind of… break the pattern. Maybe, there's even a time that the most important thing in the world is to go out after a wild horse."

Johnny looked at his father hoping he understood what the old man was saying.

"Out by Black Mesa?" Johnny asked, still not sure what was happening.

"About 40, as near I can figure," Murdoch replied. "No telling how long they'll be there. You know how a wild horse… will... move on."

"Yeah, wild horses really move fast…. when he's got a mind to," Johnny grinned. He and his father both knew that they weren't talking about horses now. They were talking about him.

Johnny saw the grin on his father's face and the twinkle in his eye.

Johnny threw the shovel, he had been holding, aside and ran to Barranca. He swung into the saddle in one fluid motion, turned the horse toward Black Mesa, and rode off at a gallop.

Murdoch was right behind him.

...********

Johnny hadn't believed his eyes when they had topped the rise near the mesa. Down below stretched out a green valley with a meandering stream running through it. Now, in the early afternoon, the mesa blocked the sun giving the valley below a feeling that evening was approaching.

The flat-topped mesa itself stood at least a thousand feet above them with steep cliffs running down to the valley below. Scott had told him that the cliff walls were made of lava, formed millions of years ago when an ancient volcano had erupted. Over time the cliffs had eroded leaving a flat top to the formation with steep black rock walls running down to the valley floor. Thus, the name Black Mesa.

His father had been right. There were at least 40 horses. All of them beautiful palominos. Horses covered the area on both sides of the stream.

Johnny's heart was pounding in his chest. His blood racing as fast as the horses he and his father were chasing. As he sped through the valley, he glanced over his shoulder. His father was doing his best to stay up with him, but his horse was no match for Barranca.

Murdoch couldn't remember when he had smiled so much. The sight of his youngest son chasing the wild herd warmed his heart. He had been trying to keep up with his son and the herd but knew he couldn't. All he really wanted to do was watch Johnny. He never grew tired of watching the fluid and graceful movements of the boy.

For the last twenty minutes, Johnny had first cut out and then given chase to a beautiful palomino mare. Her golden coat almost matching Barrancas. The white mane on the mare was now plastered to her wet neck as she tried to evade the man on horseback.

Finally, Johnny was close enough to use his lasso. Expertly, he whirled it over his head and then tossed the rope. It landed around the mare's neck. Johnny slowed Barranca and gently pulled back on the rope. The mare came to a stop, turned, and stared at him.

Johnny took up the slack in the rope and watched to see what the mare was going to do next. He didn't have to wait long. The mare reared up on her hind legs and struck out with her front. The scream of the unhappy mare filled the air. The sound bounced off the black walls of the mesa and echoed throughout the valley.

Murdoch finally caught up with his son and sat back to watch as Johnny started to control the mare. It only took a few minutes before the mare calmed enough so that Johnny could pull her in closer.

The grin on the boy's face caused Murdoch's heart to do somersaults. If he could have gotten off his horse and done cartwheels, he would have. He had never seen the boy so relaxed and so happy.

Johnny jumped off Barranca and walked slowly up to the mare. She shied away from his hand as he tried to stroke her nose.

Johnny started laughing. Murdoch couldn't believe how young Johnny looked when he laughed.

At that moment, there was not a hint of Madrid. There was only Lancer.

"Look at her, Murdoch," Johnny panted, dragging a shirt sleeve over his face. Sweat was dripping down his face and onto his now wet shirt. "Just look at her. Have you ever seen anything so pretty? She and Barranca are going to make some real pretty babies."

Murdoch dismounted and walked to stand beside his son. He wanted to reach out and throw an arm around the boy and pull him in close, but he didn't.

"Yes, son," Murdoch grinned back and bit his lower lip. "I believe you're right. She's a fine mare, and you'll get some beautiful foals out of her."

Johnny looked the mare over again and shook his head. He looked at his father with laughter in his eyes.

"Murdoch," Johnny hesitated, lowered his head, and smiled. Cocking his head, he looked up at his father. "Thanks for today."

"No need to thank me, son," Murdoch turned to look at his youngest son. "I've enjoyed myself. Being with you today is like a dream come true. I've waited a lifetime to do this with you."

Johnny nodded agreement. "So, have I old man. So, have I."

He watched Johnny move back toward the mare. He had waited a lifetime for this, and he planned to enjoy every moment of it.

...********

Johnny looked up at the sun and sighed. He really didn't want to go back; not yet.

In the last few days, he had started to feel everything closing in on him. The old yearnings were coming back. The yearnings that he got when he needed to move on. He had been getting that longing to see something new and to breathe free again.

Murdoch had surprised him today, in more ways than one. First, he had surprised him when he had taken him away from that damn row of fence posts to go after a herd of wild horses. Then, he had surprised him by understanding that he needed to do just that. What had he said, "Maybe, there's even a time that the most important thing in the world is to go out after a wild horse."

That's how he felt. Today, there was nothing more important to him than to go out after a wild horse. The day had been made perfect by the fact that his father was with him.

He looked around the green valley they were in. A flock of wild geese flew overhead in a V formation, announcing their passage with the flapping of wings and loud quacking. The slow, moving stream could be heard as water trickled over rocks in the stream bed. A light breeze was picking up making the tall, green grass of the valley wave back and forth. All of this, made more beautiful by the black rock of the mesa looming over them.

Johnny couldn't imagine a more beautiful place, and he didn't want to leave it. "Now or ever," he thought.

He now realized he didn't have to leave the ranch to find the freedom he had always craved. Lancer was big enough that, if he wanted to, he could wander this land, his land, and never feel the yearning again to move on. He could spend the rest of his life exploring this land and never discover all of its wonders.

Johnny turned to look back at his father. The old man was looking at him with a smile on his face and laughter in his eyes.

"Murdoch, do you think we can do it again someday…. someday soon? Maybe, next time we can bring Scott along. I think he would like to chase a few wild horses himself."

"I think your brother would like that," Murdoch saw the smile on his son's face and treasured it. "I know I would like that. I couldn't imagine a more perfect day than to have both of my boys out here with me. What do you say to making it a couple of days next time? We can camp out and really spend some time together."

"I'd like that. I'd like that a whole lot," Johnny answered, dipping his head and looking at the ground.

Murdoch watched his son lower his head, and a thought came to him. His son looked like he wouldn't mind his old man putting an arm around him. To tell the truth, he had held off the urge to do just that thing all afternoon. He couldn't stand it any longer.

Murdoch moved closer to his son and put his arm around his shoulders. He pulled the boy close to him.

Johnny looked up at his father a little surprised. That's when he saw the warmth and love in the old man's eyes. He knew he had made the right decision when he had come home. He knew he was making the right decision now. He put an arm around his father's waist, leaning into the giant of a man.

He thought he heard and felt his father's heartbeat increase. He knew his own heart was beating faster.

The sound of the wild mare whinnying finally intruded on their moment together. They both smiled.

"Time to go home, John," Murdoch said as he released his hold on his son and turned to his horse. "We'll chase this herd another day."

Johnny looked once more at the valley and the mesa. He watched as the fading light danced on the rippling water of the stream. He sighed and looked at his father's back. He had made up his mind.

"Murdoch," Johnny called out, taking Barranca's reins in his hand.

"Yes, son," Murdoch answered as he picked up the reins of his horse and started to mount up.

"You don't have to worry. I'm home," Johnny answered, in a quiet voice. "I plan on stayin'."

Murdoch had one foot almost in the stirrup when he heard his son's words. He lowered his foot to the ground and took a deep breath. He felt like the weight of the world had just been lifted from his shoulders. He turned and looked into his son's eyes.

Johnny could see the relief in his father's face.

"I'm glad, son," Murdoch smiled. "I'll try not to make you regret it."

Johnny gave his father a sheepish grin. "Well…if we can go chasing after wild horses every week, I know I won't regret it."

Murdoch saw the gleam in his son's eyes. "Mount up, boy," he ground out, as he stepped into the saddle and settled himself. "Let's get that mare home and show her to your brother."

"Murdoch, can we come back here again next week?" Johnny asked as he settled into his own saddle.

Murdoch didn't answer as he turned his horse toward home.

"Murdoch….," Johnny shouted. He watched as Murdoch got further away from him. "Aww, come on, old man," he called out louder and started following his father. "Can we? I promise to be good…. so, can we?"

Murdoch smiled and kept riding.

End

September 2018