Please take a moment of silence for those in Newtown, Connecticut.
:::
Yeeeah. I've gone MIA, and I apologize. Here's another oneshot, dedicated to the ever-so-judgmental yet indispensable Sarah. Also, I want to sincerely thank the "anonymous" who posted a heartwarming review to Relaxation Techniques. You made my day.
"Austin, we need to talk to you." Cue confused silence.
"About what?"
His parents sat on the edge of his bed, and suddenly he recalled the evenings of his childhood spent curling up beneath the covers while his mother read his favorite adventure novels to him. He would pay anything to go back to being carefree and well-rested – but now was not the time to wax nostalgic.
"Austin, you're aware of your duties as the prince of Moon's Mattress Kingdom."
"Yes."
"And with the kingdom well-established, we expect that eventually there will be a princess. The time will come for you and your princess to take over the kingdom, and thereby be crowned the next king and queen of Moon's Mattress Kingdom."
"Dad, I'm sixteen."
"Yes, we know," his mother interjected, "but we know how crazy teenagers can be when they do fall in love."
"If this is your way of talking to me about puberty… I've already been through some of that."
"Austin, we're not trying to be controlling, overweening parents. Actually, we just wanted to make sure you knew that you didn't have to rush into accepting your feelings for anyone. Just be sensible about what you do, okay?"
"Yeah, of course, Mom—"
"Okay. Do you have any questions?"
"Um…"
:::
"Hey, Ally?"
"Hmm?"
"You're not afraid of cameras, are you?"
"No—"
"Okay, good! You're coming with me."
"Um, Austin, I need to watch the store."
He froze midstride and cautiously turned back to raise inquisitive eyebrows at her. She watched in mock terror as his facial features slowly morphed into the classic puppy-dog eyes before finally uttering a reluctant, "Fine."
"Awesome!"
"You are so paying me back for this, Austin."
"Fine by me," he quipped. "And how should I go about paying back my near-infinite debts?"
:::
"The idea of this next shot is convey the passion, the emotion, the feelings," the photographer let out a dramatic gasp, "of two newfound lovers on the eve of their first date."
"May I ask a question, sir," Austin muttered through clenched teeth, "like, why is all of this needed for an advertisement in the local coupon book for a mattress company?"
"Oh! It was your parents' idea. Don't ask me – I am merely the artist, the genius behind the mask who forever must hold his peace, eternally subject to the bidding of his employer."
"Oh – okay, then." The mattress prince walked to his lover and offered her an arm.
"Austin, I don't know if I want to do this."
"Relax, Ally. Nobody's going to see these pictures. They're just for the mall's coupon magazine."
"Well, how many pages will the advertisement be? We've been here for four hours. My dad's going to freak."
"Um, Ally, the photographer's already started to take pictures. Quick, make a pose!"
"I can't think on my toes, Austin! You know that!"
"Yeah, I do know that. Just – just jump into my arms, or something. Here—"
"Wow, somebody's been watching cheesy romance films."
Austin huffed and was about to make a lame comeback, but the princess had already taken his shoulders and was smiling at the camera.
"That's perfect, kids! Keep it up!" Austin glared at his overly supportive parents cheering from the sidelines.
But he snaked an arm around her waist and grinned anyway.
:::
"Wow, they came out nicely."
"Yeah… three whole pages featuring 'The New Prince and Princess of Moon's Mattress Kingdom!' My parents really went all out, huh?"
The two were interrupted by an elderly lady who had approached the cash register. Ally dutifully slid off the countertop.
"Yes, Mrs. Warner, how can I help you?"
"Oh, dearie, congratulations on your fiancé – he's quite a looker, I'll say!"
A beat of tension-filled silence, then—
"Uh, we're not—"
"I saw your photographs in the tabloids."
"Huh?"
Mrs. Warner held up that week's edition of the Miami Mall Magazine. The presumably engaged couple could barely contain their laughter.
:::
"Mom, we are not going to kiss for a stupid advertisement photo."
"Oh, come on, Austin! For some reason, the entire mall is under the impression that you're engaged to each other – but either way, it's really boosting sales for the Mattress Kingdom! Oh, and Ally, dear, isn't Sonic Boom getting more customers now that the prince has proposed?"
"Well, sales have improved, but I wouldn't say that it's necessarily because of—"
"See, Austin? Now kiss her."
"Whoa, I'm not – okay, fine – but only if she's okay with it!"
"Well, why don't you ask her? She's standing right there."
"Ally—" But she was already hyperventilating.
"Ally, it'll be short, I promise—" Before she could answer, however, he had already turned back to his mother.
"Mom, we're sixteen. Why do people think we're engaged? That – that's stupid!"
"Oh, hush – we're paying the photographer by the hour," his mother whispered conspiratorially, "so get a move on it!"
"So, um, Ally—" She launched herself at him.
"Get it over with, Austin," she mumbled against his lips, but he was completely paralyzed. This inexplicable transformation – from reserved, soft-spoken Ally to bold, determined Miss Dawson – struck him as odd, but he had no time to think, anyway.
:::
"I hate finals." He heaved himself onto the countertop and lowered his head into his hands.
"Wow, Austin, I didn't know that," she snipped.
"And it doesn't help that our faces are plastered all over the mall."
She turned away from the cash register in order to fully face him. "But I thought you liked being in the spotlight, rockstar."
"Well, yeah – but my parents are taking their advertising way too far. Think about it! Six photoshoots over two weeks – how have you even found the time?"
"Now that business around here has sprung up," her eyes darted to the gaggle of customers forming around the piano, where a small girl was haphazardly performing a Beethoven sonata, "my dad has decided to take more shifts, and that's given me some more free time."
"Oh, cool."
"Yep, it's awesome."
"I bet. Hey, since you have more free time now, do you want to catch a movie on Friday?"
She decided to ignore the sudden change of topic. "I'd like that – but under one condition."
"Huh?"
"I'm not getting engaged to you anytime soon. Let your parents know."
"They'll be disappointed."
"Austin, we're sixteen."
"I know, I know." He grinned at her.
I'm not sure I'm satisfied with this piece, but it's something to let you know that I'm still alive and writing! Thanks for all your support. Couldn't have done it without you, seriously.