Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I assure you.
A Phone Call
"Abby," Tony called. "Abby."
He walked over the stereo and turned it off. "Hey," she exclaimed.
"Can you do me a favor?" he asked flashing his 100 watt smile.
Abby crossed her arms and looked suspiciously at Tony, "Depends."
"Can you hack into Ziva's phone?"
"Absolutely not." She said turning away walking through the automatic door.
"Abby please I messed up." He said following her. Abby turned around.
"What exactly did you?" She asked curiosity getting the better of her.
"Well," he smiled, "Ziva was on the phone this morning giving someone the it's not you speech so I assumed it was, well you know what I assumed." Abby nodded, "Then she asked me how do you tell someone that you no longer want to see them, and I took the phone and told the person I was Ziva's husband and that I would hunt them down if they ever contacted Ziva again."
"So what's so bad about that? Why do you need hack into her phone?"
Tony raised a finger to counter her, "You see the person on the other line Ziva's Aunt Nettie."
"DiNozzo," Abby exclaimed as she head slapped him.
"Hey, only Gibbs does that." Tony said.
"Ya, well Gibbs isn't here right now. You told Ziva's aunt that you were going to hunt her down. I'm sure it's nothing major and Ziva will clear it up."
"Abby, I told Ziva's aunt that I would grab her intestines rip them out and drive over her head." Tony winced.
Abby head slapped Tony again.
"Hey I got my fill the last time you head slapped me."
"Fine I'll help you, but if Ziva finds out I'm sending her after you."
After a few computer tricks that Tony had no idea about, he got the number and an address. He googled a flower store near there and ordered flowers. The man on the phone spoke very little English and gave it to his son who was a little more helpful. After hanging up he occupied himself for two hours before calling Ziva's aunt.
When the phone rang it was pure torture. Finally a woman picked up, "Shalom."
"Shalom. I'm Anthony DiNozzo, I work with your niece Ziva. Your doorbell should be ringing just about now."
"Hello, Mr. DiNozzo. There isn't anyone at my door."
"Darn, he's late. Anyway the reason I called was because…" There was a ring at the door bell. Nettie answered it. Tony heard muffled voices, shuffling, and the door shut.
"I assume these flowers are from you, Mr. DiNozzo." Nettie said.
"They are, ma'am. I wanted to apologize for earlier this morning or your last night, when I threatened you as Ziva's husband."
"I have heard a great deal about Mr. DiNozzo. Ziva tells me a lot more than you think, but I must say she never said you were protective. Now Ziva gave me an excuse earlier about your choice of relationship; when I asked her, but do tell why husband?"
Tony was feeling uncomfortable, but assuming he deserved it he answered, "Well there was this movie …."
Nettie cut him off, "No worries, Mr. DiNozzo. You are forgiven even though I know you are avoiding my question behind a movie reference. Ziva warned me. I withdraw the question. The flowers are lovely and you quite the charmer. Have nice evening."
Tony was relieved that she withdrew the question and then grinned at the fact Ziva's aunt thought he was a charmer, "I was wondering if you could not tell Ziva that I called. She threatened me that she would kill me if she found out I contacted you." Tony said hurriedly.
"Your secret is safe with me, Mr. DiNozzo. Shalom."
"Shalom."
Tony got up and walked over to his window and looked at the DC skyline.
It was almost 11 when Ziva's phone rang.
"Hello," she answered.
"Shalom, Ziva." Nettie replied.
"Shalom Aunt Nettie."
"I just got a very interesting phone call from an Anthony DiNozzo. Do you know him?" she teased.
"I'll kill him."
"Now child, listen there is no need for that. He called to apologize and he sent flowers and I must say he is quite the charmer."Ziva groaned. Trust Tony, she thought. Her aunt continued, "He seems different from what you speak of."
"You do not work with him." Ziva replied.
"This is true, but Ziva, however he may act towards you in public is just how do say a front. There is something else there."
"There is always something else with Tony, Aunt Nettie," Ziva replied.
"Mark my words, Ziva. This is a man who will give up his life for you and I assure you Michael will not."
"Tony would give up his life the same way Michael would give up his life for me. We are partners."
"Michael will give up his life for you for two reasons one you are his partner and two you are Director David's daughter. Tony will give up his life for you for you and no other reason."
"It does not matter, Tony will never grow up."
"You do not know that, dear."
"What excuse did he give you for saying he was my husband?" Ziva asked wanting to change the topic, but she was partly curious.
"He started to talk a movie reference. Then I told him I withdraw the question." She replied dismissively. "Do not tell him I called Ziva; he was earnest in his apology. The only reason I told you was because I think you should forgive him for whatever you are holding him accountable for. Well I'm off to run my errands. Shalom Ziva."
"Shalom Aunt Nettie."
Ziva hung up the phone and walked over to her window and looked out at the DC skyline.
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A/N: This turned out a lot more serious than I expected it to.