Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran Highschool Host Clob. sigh

This is probably crap. I just feel guilty for being here and not delivering anything. Stupid reason for writing, ne? D It didn't turn out the way I wanted it to at all, but tell me what you think, okey? If it sucks then say so!

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He let his dark eyes wander over the sleeping little form on the bed currently clinging to his pink bunny-rabbit Usa-chan and smiling contentedly like he was having a good dream.

Honey's blond head rested peacefully on the pillow, quiet sounds of snoring drifting out across the room.

Mori, sitting in the armchair next to the bed, still with the storybook he had been reading to Honey from in his hands was deeply lost in thoughts. He couldn't quite figure out what he felt about his tiny cousin and it bothered him. He had always been confident in his love and affection and these new thoughts were making him worried.

Honey-senpai was Honey-senpai, with all that came with it. He loved him, in a way. Followed and served wherever he wanted to go. Like he was destined to do. Protect and care for. Though he wasn't really sure Honey needed his protection much longer. His friendship, ofcourse, but not his protection. What was he gonna do then? He didn't know any life beyond what he and Honey had. Was it even possible?

Ofcourse he loved him. He always would love him too, but sometimes his heart ached for something more... Of not having to wash candy and creamstains of his clothes every now and then, of not being caught in the corridors carrying stuffed animals around, of not needing to protect and comfort, but maybe... even... be comforted himself...

He longed sometimes for someone on his own level. Someone to talk to. Someone who could help him bear his burdens for a while. He couldn't share them with Honey-senpai. He wouldn't understand. He would try, but not understand. Honey-senpai was... he sighed.. just a kid.

But at the same time, he dearly treasured those little moments when for example Hoeny was afraid of the thunder, and snuggled close, so close, pressing his shivering little body against Mori's convinced that the strong arms around him would defend him from everything scary in the world. Or when those huge brown eyes looked at him and begged "Stay with me. Forever" Or that one time when he had gotten vanilla frosting on his fingers and Honey had... he shrugged the thought away. It was wrong to think like that, he knew. But it had felt nice. It had given him a glimpse of how many dimensons there were to the word "relation" and which of those he wanted to explore.

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He tensed when Honey mumbled something in his sleep that sounded very much like "cake" and reached out to grab his hand before nuzzeling into the pillow again, happily smiling. Mori smiled too.

He had never considered Honey to be a love interest in the "LOVE-love" category. Not someone to share your most intimate thoughts with. Not someone who awoke the butterflies in your belly just by looking at you. They were cousins. But still... If it wasn't love he felt than what was it...?

Did he betray Honey if he ever found someone who could fill in the empty gaps of his life? Did he have room in his heart enough for two if the opportunity came? He didn't know. It confused him and he didn't like to be confused.

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The hand gripping his shoulder startled him but he didn't show it when he looked up to meet Kyuoyas calm eyes. Always calm, always smooth on the outside eventhough Mori knew there were oceans of insight lurking right underneath his skin. "I know" he seemed to say now, though his lips wasn't moving. I understand...

Maybe he did. Maybe Kyuoya really did understand what it was like to be torn between love and duty. His relation with Tamaki was almost the same, eventhough their families were not conjointed like his and Honey's was. Kyuoya took care of Tamaki because of the same twisted love as he himself felt towards Honey.

He looked away and squeezed Kyuoya's hand quickly, hoping he would understand what it meant. Thank you, Kuyoya smiled weakly before silently leaving the snoring boy and his thoughtful cousin to themselves again.

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I know, Takashi. I understand you.