Disclaimer- I do not, not do ever claim to own the world of Harry Potter, which belongs solely to J.K. Rowling.
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Life on the Quidditch pitch
We find ourselves at one overly- happy freezing cold (oxymoron, right?) school day at the beginning of the school year (freak weather) at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Fred Weasley was currently balancing a quill on his head. Or trying to. Lee Jordan, beside him, was also trying to use the quill, but for homework. This was creating a slight problem.
"Give me the quill!"
"Not planning on it." muttered Fred as he placed the quill on his head yet again, trying unsuccessfully to balance it there.
"I'm trying to do my homework!"
"That's probably why he won't give it to you." said George quite cheerfully, who was sitting in an armchair next to Fred in the Gryffindor common room.
"I don't care!"
Alicia Spinnet came up to the trio. "If I were you three, I'd get outta here."
Fred looked up, and the quill fell. "What do you mean?"
"Oliver's on the warpath. He's angry about his lack of Seeker. And Chaser." Alicia rolled her eyes. "Does he not need a life?"
"I have a life, thank you very much, I just happen to devote it to Quidditch." said a loud voice from behind Alicia.
Fred, George, and Alicia all jumped. Lee, who had grabbed Fred's quill, and was trying to catch up on his homework (which he was woefully behind on), did not. Besides, why should he? Oliver Wood wasn't his Captain.
Unfortunately for the twins and Alicia, he was theirs. He puffed up his chest, which the unfortunate trio knew to mean he was going to need a long breath to give them an even longer lecture (This consequent lack of air usually ended with Oliver panting heavily, and in one eventful Quidditch practice the year before, actually fainting).
Before he could start, Angelina Johnson came yawning down the stairs from the girls' dormitory. "Hello, Oliver." she mumbled, apparently about to head off for breakfast. Or lunch, as was the case at this time of day.
"Oh, there you are!" said Oliver, practically shouting. "I need to talk to you!"
"Unless it's about the giant banner in the girl's dormitory saying 'Long Live Oliver Wood, the Sexiest Quidditch Captain Alive', I don't want to hear it." Angelina said sleepily.
No, it's not about th- wait, what?" Oliver stopped in the middle of his sentence, momentarily distracted. "There's a banner in your dormitory saying what!"
"Long Live Oliver Wood, the Sexiest Quidditch Captain Alive." repeated Alicia, now all smiles. "I share her dormitory, it's true."
Lee looked up from his schoolwork. "Oliver, I never knew you had such a high opinion of yourself."
Fred shook his head sadly. "And here we were thinking you were a selfless fifth-year devoted to Quidditch."
"But I didn't- I would never- what-utterly ridiculous!" spluttered Oliver.
Fred and George laughed in unison. "Calm down, Oliver." said George. "It was us. We put up that banner to see your expression when you heard about it."
Fred grinned. "And trust me, it was worth it.
Oliver growled. "Listen up, all of you! We need to find a Chaser and a Seeker. But in the meanwhile, we need to practice!"
They all groaned, with the exception of Lee, who was still immersed in his work.
"But Oliver, school started last week, the first match of the season is weeks off, and it's freezing cold outside!" complained George.
"I don't care! Get out there or I'll tell McGonagall who told Peeves how to break into her office!" barked Oliver.
Alicia frowned slightly. "Speaking of that, how did you know how to break into McGonagall's office?"
"That's for us to know-"
"And you to find out!" finished George.
Alicia, Fred, Oliver, and Angelina left for the Quidditch pitch. On his way out, George stopped to look over Lee's shoulder.
"Ice cream is a major problem in goblin societies. Emric the Evil was allergic to the fatal Chocolate Chip Ice Cream and that is how Uric the Oddball managed to defeat him with a large vat of cookie dough." George read aloud. "What in Merlin's pants are you writing?"
"I'm testing out my theory that Professor Binns doesn't read our essays- he assigns random grades." said Lee without looking up.
"If I were grading this, it would get an Outstanding." commented George.
"Yes, but you are not Cuthbert Binns. You are George Weasley, and therefore you do not have the authority to grade this paper." said Lee absentmindedly, scratching his forehead with the quill.
"That is one of the reasons why you are my best mate." said George.
"Why, because I'm willing to get I'm trouble with the most boring albeit only ghost teacher to prove a theory?"
"No, because you can tell me and Fred apart." said George airily, plucking the quill from between Lee's fingers.
"GEORGE WEASLEY GIVE THAT BACK!" howled Lee as George walked away whistling, about to join his brother at the Quidditch pitch, twirling the quill in his fingers.