(Hogwarts Grading System at Bottom)
One day the three Belchers got letters from Hogwarts saying that they were magical and that they were invited to Hogwarts. Then they took a plane to London, bought their wands and school supplies and set off on the Hogwarts Express. When they arrived at Hogwarts, they took the boat with Hagrid going into the castle. They were goofing around, and Gene fell in the lake. He also had diarrhea because he ate too much on the train. When they were sorted into houses, Louise was quickly put in Slytherin, and Tina was put in Hufflepuff. It took a while to sort Gene into a house, and he was put in Hufflepuff because he didn't fit into any house. During the school year, Gene and Tina only had Charms with Louise. In all their classes, Tina was the only one who behaved. She was terrible at magic, but she didn't get yelled at that much. Gene and Louise, on the other hand, got yelled at a lot. They didn't care though. They got many detentions for sending Flitwick flying across the room, transfiguring Mcgonagall, and causing a lot of disruptions. There was also one teacher that despised all three of the Belchers: Snape. Snape hated Tina for being a screw up, and Gene and Louise for making random potions, making a mess, and splashing Snape with potions. Gene was Snape's least favorite because he would mess literally everything up, and he would pee in his potions. At one point, Tina accidently dumped her potion on Snape, and Snape was sent to Madam Pomfrey. All three Belchers got a week of detention for the things they did in their classes. Flying lessons weren't any better. Louise was the only one that managed to fly within the class period; Gene lost control and flew straight into the ground, and Tina fell off after five seconds of flying slowly five feet above the ground. After a lot of additional help though, Gene and Tina managed to fly. They couldn't go very fast, but they could at least do it. Then Quidditch tryouts came. Louise tried out for Slytherin as a Beater and made the team. Gene and Tina tried out for Hufflepuff, but didn't make it. Gene tried out as a Beater and kept missing the Bludgers, and Tina tried out for Keeper and let every goal in. Since Louise made the Slytherin team, Snape didn't want to give her as many detentions and tried to make her behave better in her other classes. But she was still able to do things without being noticed. One night, she snuck out of the Slytherin common room and got into the Hufflepuff common room. Once in there, she went into the dorms and put hot sauce in everyone's underwear. Then she left and got back to the Slytherin common room without being noticed. The next day, all the Hufflepuff's were screaming because the hot sauce burned, and nobody figured out that it was Louise because she put the hot sauce bottle in the kitchens and nobody else had a bottle. She also got away with pranking a lot of people in her classes. A few weeks later the first Quidditch match came, and Slytherin was playing Gryffindor. The entire Slytherin team had trained Louise to make no fouls during the game, and said that if she made too many she would be kicked off. She only made one foul that game, and it didn't help the Gryffindors at all. She made the foul by hitting a bludger so hard, it almost broke someone's bone. At one point the score was tied at 170-170, and Louise was having an amazing game, especially since she had a Nimbus 2001 broom that Snape got her. However, Gryffindor scored a lot of goals, caught the snitch, and won 350-210 because they are the best at Quidditch. A few days later it was Halloween, and at dinner Gene got in trouble for eating almost all of the food and throwing up and having diarrhea everywhere. Louise also got in trouble for putting a nose growing potion ingredient into a lot of people's drinks . Tina just sat there the whole time looking at a bunch of hot Gryffindor boys. The next few weeks went by as usual. The Belchers kept getting Ps, Ds, sometimes As, and rarely Es in their classes. They were very upset to hear that the UK did not celebrate Thanksgiving and did not have a Thanksgiving break. A few weeks later, around Christmas, the Belchers heard that they would not be able to go home for Christmas because their parents could not afford to travel again. During Christmas break, they had lots of snowball fights, and had lots of fun pranking Filch with Peeves. Then one night, Gene and Louise convinced Tina to try and break into Gryffindor Tower. Tina walked up to the fat lady and said hello, and the fat lady said hello and that Tina wasn't allowed in. Louise and Gene were watching this, and Louise got mad and yelled for Tina to come back to where they were hiding. On the way back, Filch saw Tina, and Louise and Gene ran away. Tina was put in a three hour detention where she had to polish all of the trophies. On Christmas morning, all three of the Belchers woke up early and opened their presents. Louise got a pair of handcuffs, Tina got a horse doll, and Gene got another fart gun. They also all got a box of chocolates. When school started up again, they were very upset, but dealt with it. Louise and her Slytherin friend Marcus handcuffed a Ravenclaw girl in Potions, and tripped her. She almost fell into her potion, and Louise and Marcus both got a detention. Gene also got a detention in Transfiguration for running around the room and using the fart gun. Snape and Sprout took the fart gun and handcuffs away from Gene and Louise and said they could have them back at the end of the year. A couple weeks later, the second Slytherin Quidditch match came up. It was Slytherin playing Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw was a very good team and would be hard to beat. They also had a very good seeker. Louise was doing a very good job as a beater, as usual, but one of the beaters on the other team sent a bludger at her and took her out of the game. She was sent to the nurse's office, and Slytherin had to try harder to win. There were almost no goals scored, and it went on for a very long time. The Slytherins were up 30-10, and the Ravenclaw seeker was about to grab the snitch ten minutes later, but the Slytherin Seeker dove down to the ground where the snitch was and jumped off his broom and caught it. Slytherin ended up winning 190-30, but it wasn't enough to catch up to the Gryffindors who were leading the league with 580 points, adding 230 points to the total of 350, after they beat Hufflepuff 230-10. The Slytherins had 400 points, the Ravenclaws had 350, and the Hufflepuffs had 270. When Louise found out that Slytherin won, she was very happy, but she got pissed off when she heard the total scores. In the next few months the Slytherin team trained super hard to catch up to Gryffindor. Louise's grades also went up because she got a lot of extra help from Snape. Louise now had an A as an average, and still didn't get that many Es, but she also didn't get a lot of Ps either. She did get a lot of Es in Defence Against the Dark Arts, though. Tina moved up to an A in Herbology and Astronomy, and did pretty well in History of Magic. But Gene still did very bad. He mainly got Ps and Ds, and sometimes As. He also got a few Ts. He was basically unteachable. Sprout said that she expects him to step it up in his second year, and started giving him additional help every day. In April the last Quidditch matches were held. Slytherin beat Hufflepuff easily with a final score of 270-90. The Gryffindors were having a very hard time beating Ravenclaw because they were missing their best two chasers and beater from a big prank the Slytherins pulled on them. The final score of the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw game was the Gryffindors losing 250-100. The final scores of the Quidditch matches were Hufflepuff with 360 points, Ravenclaw with 600, Slytherin with 670, and Gryffindor with 680. After the match, Gryffindor got the Quidditch cup and celebrated. A few days later, Spring break came, and the Belchers spent it at Hogwarts. They each got a basket with five chocolate eggs. They spent Spring break running around and causing trouble at Hogwarts. After Spring break, they had to spend the last few weeks studying for their final exams. At the end of the month, out of the seven exams, Louise passed five, Tina passed three, and Gene passed one. A week later, they took the Hogwarts express back to London, and flew home with their parents, and told them all about Hogwarts. Gene farted on the way home. The end.
Hogwarts Grading Scale
Pass Grades
O=Outstanding
E=Excellent
A=Acceptable
Fail Grades
P=Poor
D=Dreadful
T=Troll
The Belchers' Report Cards
Louise
Transfiguration: A
Charms: A
Potions: A
History of Magic: D
Defence Against the Dark Arts: E
Astronomy: P
Herbology: A
Tina
Transfiguration: P
Charms: P
Potions: D
History of Magic: A
Defence Against the Dark Arts: D
Astronomy: A
Herbology: A
Gene
Transfiguration: P
Charms: D
Potions: T
History of Magic: D
Defence Against the Dark Arts: T
Astronomy: P
Herbology: A