Disclaimer: I don't own Dragonball Z or the likes. Though I do wish I owned Vegeta::goes off into a daydream::



Mixed Vegetables
By: Veggies' Girl

Veggie, come in here, quick!, yelled Bulma, overjoyed with her new invention.
What is it now, woman?, asked a clearly irritated Vegeta.
Bulma, sitting in her lab, looked up at him with a pair of shining blue eyes.
Oh, you won't believe what I just invented! It's a machine that changes around people's personalities! I call it the Personality Transformer (A/N: from now on called the PT). So if you were to go into it with um me for example, I'd have your body and my mind, and you'd have my body and your mind! Isn't that so cool?, she shouted, still overwhelmed by her new .
That, you baka, is not cool. It's dangerous. What if something unpredicted happened? And can you change the personalities back?
Bulma, quite used to Vegeta's insults, answered as if she hadn't hear what he had called her. It is not dangerous. I should know. And it can't change personalities back yet, but I'm working on it.
Humph. I don't trust your stupid machines. I can just imagine it. Kakarotto comes in here to see it, and every possible thing goes wrong. Just keep that oaf away from here.

Goku, you just have to come over and see what I've invented!
Sure, Bulma. I'd be happy to. Can I bring Chichi along too?
Of course you can. In fact, bring the whole family! It's a must-see!
All right, we'll be right over.

*Click*
Hey, Chichi, Gohan, Goten! We're going over to the Capsule Corp. to see a new invention of Bulma's!, he shouted to his family, then added to himself, maybe it's got to do with food mmmm.

*Ding, dooooong*
Vegeta, will you open the door? I'm kinda busy.
Yeah, sure woman. Whatever.
Vegeta walked over to the door, opened it, and the moment he saw who was there, slammed it shut. He gritted his teeth, trying to overcome the insane anger rushing through him.
*Ding, dooooooongding-dong-ding-dong-ding-dong!*, went the bell.
All RIGHT, you baka! It's a doorbell, not a feakin' telegraph!!!, yelled Vegeta, seething.
He opened the door once more to admit Goku and his entire family in. Goten had even brought his stuffed teddy.
Stupid, idiotic, lame jerks from hell I ought to calm down Vegeta, they'll be out of here in no time, thought Vegeta.
Oh, Vegeta, do you have any food? I'm kinda hungry. All I had was dinner before we came here, said Goku. That very moment, out of nowhere, Chichi pulled out a frying pan and smacked Goku over the head with it.
How dare you not be full after my dinner?! I stood for two hours in the kitchen making it for you!, screeched Chichi.
Ow, ow, ow, ow, OW! That hurt! Why'd you do that?, exclaimed Goku, quite surprised at his wife's outburst.
Because I love you so much, honey, she answered in a voice dripping with honey and laced with barbed wire.
That's a strange way to show your love, he replied.
*WHAM* (No, not the 80's group WHAM! with George Michael. It's the sound a frying pan hitting someone over the head makes ^_^)

Shut up, all of you. It's a bad enough day without all of you around here, said Vegeta.
Ooooh, you're here! Great! Come on down to my lab! Bulma had just walked into the hallway and was very happy to see Goku with his family.
Lead the way, miss inventor, began Goten, but getting lost in what he was saying, finished quickly.
Hey Goten!, exclaimed Trunks, who had just come into the room.
Hey Trunks! We're gonna go see your mom's new machine!
Yeah, I know. Let's go!
The whole group of people started making their way down to the lab, with Vegeta keeping a safe distance. He was fearing the worst. Inside the lab, everyone (xept Vegeta) stared at the machine in awe. It was a tall space-ship shaped chamber, with one door and a hell of a lotta buttons on the outside.
What are the buttons for, Bulma? Can you eat them?, enquired Goku, salivating.
*WHAM!*
No, Goku, I guess I put them there to make the PT look snazzy. They don't do anything. The only button that works is the big red one by the door. DONT TOUCH IT!, answered Bulma.
Goku started walking around the machine, examining it. Vegeta in the meantime began getting closer, though never in his life would he have admitted that the PT impressed it. He just wanted to look at the machine. As luck would have it, Goku, who was approaching him, tripped over his own foot. He flew towards Vegeta, who sensed something veeeeeery bad was about to happen. Goku slammed into Vegeta, propelling them both towards the open door of the machine.
T TOUCH THE RED BUTTON!, screamed Bulma, but it was too late. Goku, looking for something to catch his balance on, leaned on the red button, his hand slipped, and both he and Vegeta fell into the PT. The door automatically closed, and bright lights started flashing inside. All of a sudden, everything stopped, and everybody uncovered their eyes. The door of the PT opened, and out came Goku and Vegeta.
V-V-V-Vegeta? Are you all right?, said Bulma, her voice quiet and scared.
Of course I'm fine, answered Goku.
Shut up, Goku, she wasn't talking to you. You've made enough trouble for one day. Chichi was quick to chide him.
How dare you call me Go Kakarotto?! And it wasn't my fault, stupid Earth woman!, Goku yelled at her.
*WHAM!*
How DARE YOU! I'LL KILL YOU, screamed Goku at her. Chichi got a very confused and alarmed look on her face.
Vegeta, who had just turned his head around to look at Goku got a freaked look on his face. V-v-v-vegeta? Why do you have my body... and my voice?, he asked.
What?! No, this can't be! I knew something like this would happen! You baka woman!, yelled Vegeta in the body of Goku and lunged at Bulma. (A/N: From now on, Vegeta in the body of Goku will be known as Vegeta itbog, and Goku in the body of Vegeta will be known as Goku itbov. Kinda screwed up, but there's no other way. ^_^)
No, please uh Vegeta, I can switch you back! All I need is one day!, said Bulma, trying at all costs to protect herself from the storming Vegeta itbog. (A/N: Hee hee, looks and sounds so funny.)
Fine, but you'd better hurry, he answered.
Chichi, I guess you guys better go home. Umm how do we do this? Maybe Vegeta itbog should stay here, and you take Goku itbov. I know it'll look stange, but it'll only be the body that's different. Come back tomorrow, and I'll have the machine ready.

Later that night, Vegeta (itbog) had gotten almost used to his new . The joints of his body worked a little differently than his old body's joints, but the energy was the same. This however was infuriating Vegeta (itbog).
How can that baka be as strong as I am? It's not possible! I train so hard
Hey, Goku! What are you doing here?, asked Bulma as she came into the living room. Suddenly realizing her mistake, she tried to cover it up by saying, He he, gotcha! I was just joking hee hee
She practically melted under Vegeta itbog's blazing gaze.
you working on the PT?, he managed to hiss out through clenched teeth.
Oh, yeah. I-I'm working on it. I gotta go now, she said, quickly scooting out of the room.
my muscles feel really weird. I thing I'll go take a bath, thought Vegeta to himself. He went up the stairs and into the bathroom, where he prepared a steaming tub of water.
At that moment, Bulma was in the lab tinkering with the PT. Suddenly she heard a screech so horrifying she dropped all her tools and ran up the stairs to see what it was. She kicked open the door of the bathroom and jumped in.
Oh my Kami. I'm so sorry I-I mean, I know it's you Veggie, but I've never seen Goku's naked body before well, not grow-up, that is but what the hell were you screaming about?, she said, covering her eyes.
I forgot all about the fact that I was in Kakarotto's body and and I looked in the mirror, he began whimpering. Now I'll have that image in my mind for the rest of my life I, I can't take it anymore. I know that this is my body now, but it's like having that moron stand in front of me naked I-I-, Vegeta (itbog) slid to the floor, shaking.
There, there, said Bulma, doing her best to comfort him. The machine will be ready by tomorrow and you'll be back to normal.
I take solace only in the fact that even though our energy levels are the same, my thing is larger than his

Goku, you've been in the bathroom for ever! What are you doing?, asked Chichi.
Oh, uhhh I'll be out in a moment, I I've got stomach problems, answered Goku, his voice muffled by the door.
Hee hee! I knew Bulma's cooking was bad, but that bad? Hee hee, chuckled Chichi.
In fact, Goku (itbov) was not having stomach problems. The only problem he was having was with believing that the body he could see in the mirror was Vegeta's.
Oh wow, he thought to himself. Oh wow, oh wow, oh wow! I've never seen anything this perfect before. The tone of skin, the curves of every muscle, that thing! It's huge! And the hair, he continued, running his fingers through the ebony-coloured mane. It's so soft and smooth. Aw, I wish my hair was like that. I'll have to ask Veggie what shampoo he uses.
He finally got enough out of looking in the mirror, dressed himself and left the bathroom.
In the kitchen, Chichi was preparing a snack for Goku, as his stomach usually informed him at this hour that it needed replenishing.
Wow, Chichi, wait for the surprise I have in stock for you tonight!, he exclaimed joyfully.
Are you INSANE?, yelled Chichi, throwing the oh-so carefully prepared at Goku (itbov). I would never spend a night with Vegeta's body, even if I knew it was you inside there! I wouldn't bare looking at it, knowing I was looking at Bulma's husband! You're sleeping on the couch!
But, but, stammered Goku (itbov). I wanted to make you happy
The only way you can make me happy is staying out of trouble. But that's impossible! Trouble seems to be your middle name!
But I don't have a middle name and anyways, who would give their kid Trouble for a middle name?
*WHAM!-WHAM!-WHAM!-WHAM!-WHAM!!!*

At the Capsule Corp., a similar situation was being played out.
You know, Vegeta, I just don't feel right sleeping with my best friend's husband's body it seems unethical.
I agree with you in whole. You've seen enough of his body already. I don't want you to go blind. Vegeta (itbog) smiled at his cunning joke. I think I'll sleep in some other room.
Yes, I think that's a very wise choice. I guess some of Goku's genes are rubbing off on you. Maybe he's not that stupid after all. Bulma in turn grinned at her own joke, for she knew it would get Vegeta angry.
Watch your mouth, babe, or you'll be walking around with a white stick and a seeing-eye dog. And it won't be because you saw too much of Goku's body. Vegeta (itbog) was beginning to enjoy this exchange of sharp remarks.
I'd say something smart back, but I didn't hear your last remark. I must have gone deaf, she answered and smiled.
Hey, this birdie is so small, it's giving off sounds so high only the dolphins can hear it. Maybe it somehow affected your hearing, too, retorted Vegeta (itbog).
What did you say, sonny? I can't hear you, Bulma mimicked an old-granny voice.
Vegeta (itbog) smirked and then gave a huge yawn, signaling that he needed a good night's rest.
Well, I can see you're tired. I'll let you go now. Have a good night's rest, Goku!
Vegeta, on an impulse, picked up a lamp standing on a table beside him, but realizing what he was doing, put it back, and then picked up a pillow lying on the floor and threw it at Bulma. The pillow, having been thrown by so strong a person smacked her straight on the face and threw her off the bed onto her butt.
, she exclaimed. Watch it bozo, or it won't be only today that you'll be sleeping somewhere else. It'll be permanently!
Yeah, right, retorted Vegeta, smirking as he left the room.
Stupid, dumb, lovable, cuddly jerk, said Bulma quietly, thinking Vegeta (itbog) had left. But he was standing by the door, and his sensitive Saiya-jin ears had heard her every word.
What a woman, he said, grinning and shaking his head.

Goku's family was walking up to the door of the Capsule Corp. Some people walking by looked on inquisitively, seeing Vegeta with another family.
Goku (itbov) was about to press the doorbell when he stopped and turned to Chichi.
, he said. What's a telegraph?
*WHAM*
Oooooooohhh, that one really hurt!, he said, biting his lip to hold back the tears.
You dumb oaf, she yelled at him. Just press the doorbell.
That he did, and a few moment later, they were opened by Vegeta (itbog).
Wow, I didn't know they installed a mirror in the doorway. That was a stupid thing to do. How do we get in now?, enquired Goku (itbov).
You baka! This is me, you jerk! I'm in your stupid body, and you're in mine!, cried Vegeta (itbog), exasperated.
Oh. Hee hee, Goku laughed, a little embarrassed, and a sweat-drop appeared behind his head.
Come in, Vegeta sighed, hoping that nothing would go wrong that day.
They all walked down to the lab, with Trunks and Goten following behind, snickering at the entire situation that had occurred.
Your dad's hair is funny. It's stands up real straight, like there was no gravity or something, sniggered Goten.
Yeah, and your dad looked hilarious last night. You know how my dad frowns all the time?, asked Trunks. Well, he did the same thing with your dad's face. I guess it's a habit. But it was so funny. Your dad never goes around for long frowning. He's usually smiling.
Oh yeah?, said Goten. Well I've got something even better for you. You dad went around laughing and smiling all last night! I've never seen him do that!
, said Trunks in disbelief. I've got to see that.
He ran up to Goku (itbog) and said: Goku-san, why did the old man throw his butter out the window?
I don't know, answered Goku (itbov), perplexed.
Cuz he wanted to see a butter-fly! Get it?, said Trunks.
, laughed Goku (itbov) with all his heart.
Trunks returned to the back of the group, where he rejoined Goten and said: You know what that was scary.
I know, Goten whispered back.

In the lab, Bulma had already gotten the PT up and running. Now, beside the red button, there was also a green button.
Well, Goku and Vegeta or Vegeta and Goku whatever, you can get in the machine, instructed Bulma.
The two Saiya-jins quickly got in, happy to soon get back their own bodies. Bulma pressed the green button, there were some flashes of light, then everything quieted down and the door of the PT opened. Out stepped Goku and Vegeta.
Veggie, are you back in your body?, asked Bulma.
Yeah, I thinks so, answered Vegeta, indeed in his own body. But I've got one hell of a head-ache I wonder why? And these bumps on my head That stupid baka Chichi! Why, I ough to-
Oh Goku, you're back to normal! Chichi was very happy to see her husband back the way she liked him.
Oh yeah, Chichi! I'm really glad myself! And I smell so nice!, Goku exclaimed, slapping Chichi on the back. The force of the hit made Chichi stumble forward, right into the PT. That was the moment Vegeta was waiting for. With an evil grin on his face, he stepped behind Goku and shoved him into the machine. He then jabbed the red button, and with a small ki blast destroyed the green button.
This should be fun. Well, at least until Bulma fixes the PT, he smiled to himself.

THE END

Well, that's all. I appreciate any reviews or e-mails (kotszok@polbox.com). Please, no flames SPARE ME! ;;;
You can also go check out my fic Who Cares?.