Away 1/1
Author: Amanda
Rating: R
Disclaimers: Everything belongs to Joss.
Summary: Somewhere in the future, where Spike and Buffy are happy.
Distribution: Please ask.
A/N: Thanks to Mezz for the beta
**************
Brochures were spread out over the bed. She wanted to make sure this was done right.
They had so many firsts together. First kiss, both under a spell and on their own. First
kiss after she proclaimed 'I love you.' First real date. All kinds of firsts. And now their
first vacation.
She didn't know the last time she'd had a vacation. Was it the summer between her
sophomore and junior year when she stayed with her dad in LA? Or the summer after
that when she'd ran away and waited tables? Were those really vacations? Had she ever
had one? It didn't really matter though, because they'd never had a vacation together.
Vacation conjured up thoughts of sunny beaches and fruity drinks with umbrellas. There
were no sunny beaches in their future. At least not together. But that's what he was
pushing for.
Her eyes roamed the carefully arranged brochures. They were separated, each continent
grouped together. That was the way they did most everything these days. Organized.
Carefully thought out. Like redecorating their bedroom. Every small thing was debated
until it was just right, from the color of the throw pillows, to where the alarm clock would
be positioned. They found order in one aspect of their life. It was order they needed,
when the rest was so topsy turvy.
Over and over, her eyes came back to one leaflet. London. When she'd first seen it, it
had called to her. It wasn't tropical trees, crystal clear beaches, or fun in the sun. It was
somewhere she knew she had to go. Maybe it had to do with the fact that the two most
important men in her life were from there. Or the need to go somewhere where she knew
English was spoken. But more than anything, she wanted to know him. She wanted to
walk the streets, knowing that her lover had walked them too. See the world through his
eyes, find out what shaped him.
"But why can't we go to London? You can show me around. Maybe even go and visit
Giles. Bath isn't too far, is it?"
"Why not Katmandu? Spain? Or Australia. I've never been to Australia. We could
explore it together."
"It's awfully sunny there. But isn't London gray and cloudy? Especially during
February."
"Not London."
"But why? I thought that was your home?"
"Too many memories, pet."
She pushed the organized piles out of the way. Twining her body around his, she wanted
to be close. Take the pain away. Legs hooked around his hips as her arms snaked over
his chest to pull her body close to his, she rested her cheek against his back, trying to
absorb the pain she had seen in his eyes. "Bad ones?"
"They're all enhanced now. And exploring those places would just bring out what I did.
What I was."
They didn't often talk about his soul. At least not anymore. It hadn't really changed him.
Not on the outside. But inside, she knew that actions weighed on him. Not always, just
when he remembered. And she tried to keep him from remembering too often, as she
didn't want a broody Spike. "We can make good memories. Overshadow the ones in the
past."
"It's not that easy. Or that simple."
"It can be. We can walk the streets at night. Go on one of those walking tours. I can
pretend to be all scared of the atrocities that Jack the Ripper committed and you can hug
me close. You can see the Beatles at Madame Tussaud's. Take your picture with them.
We can compare it to the one you have, see if they really are identical. Take in a play, do
some shopping. Let me make new memories with you. Let me chase the demons away."
She could feel the resistance start to melt out of him. Out of his back and into her chest.
One hand held him firmly against her, as the other slowly dragged the hem of his shirt up.
Her fingers traced his chest. She knew every inch, but never tired of exploring, making
sure he was fully imprinted in her.
"Better yet?"
"A little," he whispered back.
She pulled away from him long enough to pull his shirt off. Her breath whispered over
the planes of his back. Her cheek caressed the marble of his body. Fingers playing over
his chest enticed a small growl from his throat. It rumbled through his body, straight into
hers. She wanted this. Him. And she wanted to love his pain away.
With a moan of regret, she unfurled herself from around him. She had been dressed for
bed in a tanktop and cotton pants, while he was still clad in only his jeans. She knelt in
front of him, her hands on his thighs. Slowly they moved upwards as she licked at a
small patch of skin right above the top button.
"Buffy." She heard him moan as her hands reached their destination.
"Spike." She murmured back, as fingers slowly began the unveiling process.
As he pushed his jeans down to the floor, she stood up, drawing her top over her head,
then shimmying out of her pants. His hands reached for her, but she evaded him. "No.
Let me. Let me make you forget."
It wasn't the time for long drawn out games or seductions. Just time for them. Time to
lose themselves in the other. To forget the outside world, the outside problems. She
knelt in front of him on the bed. Her knees cradling his hips. One hand held his chin, so
that she could look him in the eye. The other held him. Fingers stroked his hard flesh.
As she teased him, she teased herself. The tips of her fingers, circled him, while her
knuckled brushed against her own heat. She wanted him. But she wanted it perfect. Just
the two of them, locked in each other's embrace. Nothing else in the world, but them.
Remembering another time, she stared him straight in the eyes, as she lowered her body
down. She could feel the gasp from him, at the same time the air left her lungs. It was
always the same. An intense feeling of coming home. Of pleasure. Of love. There was
nothing else like it. It was perfect.
She surrounded him. Her legs twined around his body, ankles clasped behind his back.
Both hands fisted in the hair on the nape of his neck. Holding on for dear life. Holding
on so that they could stare at each other, lose each other in their gaze.
She could feel his hands roaming her hips, cupping her, fitting her closer to him. Slowly
they rocked together. To the naked eye it wouldn't look like much. But to them it was
everything. She clutched him tighter to her body, rubbing her nipples against his chest.
Her head moved to his neck. She traced the veins with her tongue, learning the flow of
what kept him with her. As her tongue reached his ear, she drew the lobe in between her
teeth, lightly flicking it.
Nails dug into her skin as he tried to pull her closer, as he tried to lodge himself deeper
inside. She felt the sting as his blunt teeth bit into her shoulder. Her body pulled him in
deeper, wanting to mesh their flesh together. Sucking him in, surrounding him.
"Just think of me. And you. Together like this." She gasped words in his ear as they
moved together. She could feel her slick skin against his cool body. "Forget everything
else. Just this. This is us."
His hand trailed over her hip, coming to rest against her abdomen. As one finger trailed
straight down her body, capturing the distended nub, she yanked his head from her neck.
As he captured her, she captured his lips. His finger, her tongue, their bodies stroked in
unison. Slow moves in unity gave way to discordant surges. But together they stayed
connected, not slice of space between them.
Together, as though the surge of life gave out of them, they collapsed. Bodies shuddered.
Hands groped. They held on as their battle ended.
She needed to breathe. Her lungs gasped for air. Wrenching her mouth from his, she
pulled back. Open mouthed, she dragged the cool air into her lungs. Her chest burned.
Her legs ached. But her body sung. She remembered her purpose. Her intention.
Reaching out, she traced the curve of his lower lip. "Did I banish the memories. Did I
drive them far away?" The kiss upon her thumb answered her question.
"Let me take it all away. Let me make new memories for you. Ones of you and me.
Happy. In love. Let's go away. Let me take it all away."
Author: Amanda
Rating: R
Disclaimers: Everything belongs to Joss.
Summary: Somewhere in the future, where Spike and Buffy are happy.
Distribution: Please ask.
A/N: Thanks to Mezz for the beta
**************
Brochures were spread out over the bed. She wanted to make sure this was done right.
They had so many firsts together. First kiss, both under a spell and on their own. First
kiss after she proclaimed 'I love you.' First real date. All kinds of firsts. And now their
first vacation.
She didn't know the last time she'd had a vacation. Was it the summer between her
sophomore and junior year when she stayed with her dad in LA? Or the summer after
that when she'd ran away and waited tables? Were those really vacations? Had she ever
had one? It didn't really matter though, because they'd never had a vacation together.
Vacation conjured up thoughts of sunny beaches and fruity drinks with umbrellas. There
were no sunny beaches in their future. At least not together. But that's what he was
pushing for.
Her eyes roamed the carefully arranged brochures. They were separated, each continent
grouped together. That was the way they did most everything these days. Organized.
Carefully thought out. Like redecorating their bedroom. Every small thing was debated
until it was just right, from the color of the throw pillows, to where the alarm clock would
be positioned. They found order in one aspect of their life. It was order they needed,
when the rest was so topsy turvy.
Over and over, her eyes came back to one leaflet. London. When she'd first seen it, it
had called to her. It wasn't tropical trees, crystal clear beaches, or fun in the sun. It was
somewhere she knew she had to go. Maybe it had to do with the fact that the two most
important men in her life were from there. Or the need to go somewhere where she knew
English was spoken. But more than anything, she wanted to know him. She wanted to
walk the streets, knowing that her lover had walked them too. See the world through his
eyes, find out what shaped him.
"But why can't we go to London? You can show me around. Maybe even go and visit
Giles. Bath isn't too far, is it?"
"Why not Katmandu? Spain? Or Australia. I've never been to Australia. We could
explore it together."
"It's awfully sunny there. But isn't London gray and cloudy? Especially during
February."
"Not London."
"But why? I thought that was your home?"
"Too many memories, pet."
She pushed the organized piles out of the way. Twining her body around his, she wanted
to be close. Take the pain away. Legs hooked around his hips as her arms snaked over
his chest to pull her body close to his, she rested her cheek against his back, trying to
absorb the pain she had seen in his eyes. "Bad ones?"
"They're all enhanced now. And exploring those places would just bring out what I did.
What I was."
They didn't often talk about his soul. At least not anymore. It hadn't really changed him.
Not on the outside. But inside, she knew that actions weighed on him. Not always, just
when he remembered. And she tried to keep him from remembering too often, as she
didn't want a broody Spike. "We can make good memories. Overshadow the ones in the
past."
"It's not that easy. Or that simple."
"It can be. We can walk the streets at night. Go on one of those walking tours. I can
pretend to be all scared of the atrocities that Jack the Ripper committed and you can hug
me close. You can see the Beatles at Madame Tussaud's. Take your picture with them.
We can compare it to the one you have, see if they really are identical. Take in a play, do
some shopping. Let me make new memories with you. Let me chase the demons away."
She could feel the resistance start to melt out of him. Out of his back and into her chest.
One hand held him firmly against her, as the other slowly dragged the hem of his shirt up.
Her fingers traced his chest. She knew every inch, but never tired of exploring, making
sure he was fully imprinted in her.
"Better yet?"
"A little," he whispered back.
She pulled away from him long enough to pull his shirt off. Her breath whispered over
the planes of his back. Her cheek caressed the marble of his body. Fingers playing over
his chest enticed a small growl from his throat. It rumbled through his body, straight into
hers. She wanted this. Him. And she wanted to love his pain away.
With a moan of regret, she unfurled herself from around him. She had been dressed for
bed in a tanktop and cotton pants, while he was still clad in only his jeans. She knelt in
front of him, her hands on his thighs. Slowly they moved upwards as she licked at a
small patch of skin right above the top button.
"Buffy." She heard him moan as her hands reached their destination.
"Spike." She murmured back, as fingers slowly began the unveiling process.
As he pushed his jeans down to the floor, she stood up, drawing her top over her head,
then shimmying out of her pants. His hands reached for her, but she evaded him. "No.
Let me. Let me make you forget."
It wasn't the time for long drawn out games or seductions. Just time for them. Time to
lose themselves in the other. To forget the outside world, the outside problems. She
knelt in front of him on the bed. Her knees cradling his hips. One hand held his chin, so
that she could look him in the eye. The other held him. Fingers stroked his hard flesh.
As she teased him, she teased herself. The tips of her fingers, circled him, while her
knuckled brushed against her own heat. She wanted him. But she wanted it perfect. Just
the two of them, locked in each other's embrace. Nothing else in the world, but them.
Remembering another time, she stared him straight in the eyes, as she lowered her body
down. She could feel the gasp from him, at the same time the air left her lungs. It was
always the same. An intense feeling of coming home. Of pleasure. Of love. There was
nothing else like it. It was perfect.
She surrounded him. Her legs twined around his body, ankles clasped behind his back.
Both hands fisted in the hair on the nape of his neck. Holding on for dear life. Holding
on so that they could stare at each other, lose each other in their gaze.
She could feel his hands roaming her hips, cupping her, fitting her closer to him. Slowly
they rocked together. To the naked eye it wouldn't look like much. But to them it was
everything. She clutched him tighter to her body, rubbing her nipples against his chest.
Her head moved to his neck. She traced the veins with her tongue, learning the flow of
what kept him with her. As her tongue reached his ear, she drew the lobe in between her
teeth, lightly flicking it.
Nails dug into her skin as he tried to pull her closer, as he tried to lodge himself deeper
inside. She felt the sting as his blunt teeth bit into her shoulder. Her body pulled him in
deeper, wanting to mesh their flesh together. Sucking him in, surrounding him.
"Just think of me. And you. Together like this." She gasped words in his ear as they
moved together. She could feel her slick skin against his cool body. "Forget everything
else. Just this. This is us."
His hand trailed over her hip, coming to rest against her abdomen. As one finger trailed
straight down her body, capturing the distended nub, she yanked his head from her neck.
As he captured her, she captured his lips. His finger, her tongue, their bodies stroked in
unison. Slow moves in unity gave way to discordant surges. But together they stayed
connected, not slice of space between them.
Together, as though the surge of life gave out of them, they collapsed. Bodies shuddered.
Hands groped. They held on as their battle ended.
She needed to breathe. Her lungs gasped for air. Wrenching her mouth from his, she
pulled back. Open mouthed, she dragged the cool air into her lungs. Her chest burned.
Her legs ached. But her body sung. She remembered her purpose. Her intention.
Reaching out, she traced the curve of his lower lip. "Did I banish the memories. Did I
drive them far away?" The kiss upon her thumb answered her question.
"Let me take it all away. Let me make new memories for you. Ones of you and me.
Happy. In love. Let's go away. Let me take it all away."