The usual disclaimer: Ranma ½ is a trademark of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ Communications, and its characters have been borrowed without permission. This story was written for non-commercial purposes only. I do claim the characters of Sergeant Imia, Officer Kokawa, and Officer Ueda (if you want to borrow them, you only have to ask – just common courtesy after all).
While this is story is part of the Bindings ("Kasumi's Fate") continuum, it's not necessary to have read any of the previous stories. You only need to know four things:
1) Ranma and Akane are happily dating now.
2) Kasumi and Tofu are engaged.
3) Ranma and Ryoga have "buried the hatchet" (and not in each other skulls).
4) Akane is aware of who P-Chan is now.
Anything else isn't important to enjoy the story (although, please feel free to read the other stories).
Onwards…
Chapter 1: The New Man
Police Sergeant Imia nodded to the officer at the Desk as he headed into his station. It was a nice Sunday morning and the weather was exceptional for late June – there was no trace of humidity at all in the air, despite the number of Jusenkyo cursed individuals on his beat. Inspector Ojima had given him a warning that his station had drawn "Bookkeeping Duty" this week. Maybe he'd take the Duty himself and use it as an excuse to stay outside today.
"Hey Sarge!" one of his men yelled out. Actually, the man was a woman – Officer Kokawa who had been with him six years. She rarely ticked him off and never bothered him unless there was something truly out of her control, so he was a little on his guard. If she was bothering to flag him down, that meant extra work had to be done.
"What's up, Kokawa? We have an outbreak of Yakuza Protection scams again?" he asked.
The officer snorted. "No. After the last set had to be cut out of that brick wall, and we charged them for the time it took and to repair the wall, we haven't heard from them since. We have a new officer starting with us today."
The Sergeant shrugged. "They have to start somewhere. What's the big deal?"
"He's not a new recruit; he's been sent to us from Minato," she told him. The Sergeant's eyebrows shot up. Kokawa continued: "You know what that means, Boss."
"Yes," Imia replied. "It means he ticked someone off and has been sent to us until he either tires of being subjugated to his Lordship," he said, placing great distaste on the last word. "Or manages to get himself on permanent disability. I wish they'd stop dumping the problem cases here – I'm getting tired of filling out the hospital forms."
"Ah, it keeps you busy," Kokawa said, busting her superior's chops.
"And what the hell makes you think I want to be busy?" he asked her.
"Well, you run a station that is only staffed at a third of what it should have," she taunted him. "You must like keeping all the overtime shifts for yourself, because heaven knows you don't give them to the rank and file. Besides, you need to get rid of the belly somehow."
"Stop talking to my wife." He hit the back of her head with the files in his hand to try and wipe that smirk off her face. It didn't work, but that didn't bother him either. "All right, give me the new guy's file. I'll see if I can talk some sense into him." Her face sobered up and she handed him the file. "By the way," he continued, "we have Bookkeeping this week. I'm thinking of taking the walkabout today. Any rumors?"
Kokawa thought for a few moments. "Yamamoto was in here earlier. Someone trashed one of his construction sites. Normally, he wouldn't care, but they wrecked a fair amount of mahogany paneling and he wants someone held accountable."
Imia snorted. "He's a merchant, Kokawa. They always want someone held accountable."
"Yeah," she agreed. "But, he was fairly polite about this one and he didn't know we had the Bookkeeping. I don't think he was here to bust your chops. Ito went to look at things…He thinks it was a Dojo War."
Imia winced. "Damn. All right. I'll look into it. Anything else?"
"Yep. One of the walls down near the library is missing. Rumors have it that it was Himself or one of his crew," Kokawa replied.
"Has Himself shown up since it happened?" Imia asked. At the shake of her head, he continued: "Then it wasn't Himself, but he knows who did it. I'll stop by and talk to him."
As a smile crossed his lips, Kokawa warned him: "Stay out of the kitchen, Boss."
"The thought never crossed my mind!" he protested.
"Not feeling well, are we?" Kokawa said sarcastically as she turned to leave. Imia let it go.
The Sergeant walked down to his office. He hoped nothing serious was waiting for him as he was actually looking forward to that walk. This business with the new guy bothered him though. Usually, when a new recruit arrived at the station, the Sergeant knew they were only here for six months or so until they were rotated out. He made a point of never having them assigned to Bookkeeping or any of the weirder things that happened in Nerima. They did their jobs, picked up experience, and moved on (for which they were eternally grateful – the Sergeant often received postcards from many of them still). Then there were the ones he thought of as "his". These came in two types – one set was the warped souls (like himself) who actually loved the cast of characters that lived in Nerima.
The other set was the outcasts who were sent to Nerima as punishment. These unfortunate souls had ticked off the powers-that-be in their efforts to rise to the top. Instead of getting fired, they were sent here to Nerima where they were guaranteed to never be significantly promoted ever again. Many of them came here believing that they could somehow change Nerima, and earn their next big break here. These fools usually sought to make an example of Toshio Kuno ("his Lordship" as Imia and his people sarcastically called the elder Kuno) only to be hopelessly outwitted and publically embarrassed further. Or, worse yet, the publicity-seeking idiot would take on one of the numerous dojos. That *never* ended well for the officer. The best outcome was total humiliation. The worst outcome…well let's just leave it that Imia could fill out a disability form faster than any of his contemporaries in the other Wards.
Some of the doomed officers would quit the force shortly thereafter, resigning themselves to a new career. Others might continue to try, forcing Imia to place them on Traffic Detail (without a gun) until they quit. However, there were a few prized ones who began to understand the people of Nerima and became warped like Imia, Kokawa, and the rest of the lunatics.
Imia sat down at his desk and began to look through the new officer's file. Surprisingly enough, there was no mention of showboating or any other screw-ups. That meant the officer had been banished for political reasons. Maybe, just maybe, this guy might be a keeper. Imia needed to find out what had happened at Officer Sadao Ueda's last assignment. The Sergeant knew that if he called the old precinct, he'd never get a straight answer. He needed some one-on-one time with Ueda to get the story; Imia now knew who would be joining him on the walkabout today…
As Imia walked into the squad room, he heard the normal catcalls of "About time!" and "You almost missed the doughnuts!", but the room became properly respectful as he approached the podium. "Good morning, my fellow inmates!" he greeted them. He used that one very infrequently – infrequently enough that it actually got a few chuckles. "It is my great pleasure to tell you that I just received the official call about half-an-hour ago; we have Bookkeeping this week." Groans and moans greeted that. "However, since I am a benevolent leader, I will take today's shift."
"Hah!" one of the men yelled out. "I bet Himself is on the list today!"
"Miss Tendo won't have a cookie left in her kitchen!" someone else shouted out.
"A happy coincidence," Imia agreed; a comment that was greeted with laughter. As Imia shifted into a more serious stance, his men picked up on it and became more sober. "We have some domestic disputes I want followed up on this morning," the Sergeant continued. "We also have a shoplifter targeting some of the clothing stores. Enough has been stolen that I suspect this might be more than one individual. Keep your eyes opened and whisper in the appropriate ears. I want three plain clothes officers to do a little appropriate wandering this afternoon."
"On a more serious note, we may have a dojo war going on. Ito took a look this morning – something trashed one of Yamamoto's new sites last night, destroying a lot of expensive stock. He guesses about thirty people were involved. Since Forensics came up a little short, we are guessing martial artists. Have a chat with the usual suspects and see if anything turns up. I want the dojos identified so we can have a little discussion with the Senseis." There were several nodding heads in the room.
"One last thing," Imia said. "I am pleased to announce a new officer has joined our little family." Several faces turned wary at that statement. "Officer Ueda, would you please stand up?" A tall man with black hair and a mustache stood up. He quietly nodded to the room. "Ueda," the Sergeant addressed him. "You're with me today. The Bookkeeping assignment will be a good way to introduce you to our fair city." The Sergeant noticed that many of his men seemed to lock down their responses (which he appreciated). Ueda just nodded to the Sergeant and sat down. "All right – Mori has your assignments. Please check with him as you leave."
Ueda met the Sergeant outside squad room. "I'm ready when you are, Sergeant Imia," he told his new boss.
"Good. Let me pick up the Book, and we will be off," the Sergeant replied motioning Ueda to follow him.
Ueda sighed as he walked besides the Sarge. "And what exactly is the Book? Am I about to be put through a hazing ritual?"
"Suspicious fellow, aren't you? I like that in my officers," Sarge said. "No, you are not going to get hazed – Nerima will do that all by itself." The two policemen reached the front desk. "As for the Book – this is it," Imia said as he accepted it from the officer on Desk Duty. Imia handed the Book to Ueda and waited.
"It looks like a large oversized accounting book," Ueda remarked slowly." He then read off an entry: "Jun Aoki, Okeda Dojo, four bushels of apples, two dozen grapefruit, three hours of labor to Mei's Fruit Stand. Paid in full on October 10, 2001."
The Sergeant took the Book back and led the way out of the door. "That's exactly what it is," Imia said. "It's an accounting book. Every martial artist in Nerima has a page in this book." They exited outside and Sarge led the way into downtown Nerima.
"If I believed the stories about Nerima, the martial artists ran amok here and ignored the Law," Ueda commented with a raised eyebrow. "The stories say the martial artists have no respect for us at all."
The Sergeant laughed a little at that. "Keep that opinion to yourself if you don't want to piss off the Inspector and end up on traffic duty for the next three months."
"And you're not offended by the stories?" Ueda asked with a raised eyebrow.
"No, I know the truth, as strange as it sounds," Imia said. He led the way down to an Okonomiyaki restaurant and banged on the door. A young woman opened the door dressed in a kimono. "I'm sorry sirs…" she started, then trailed off. "Oh, hello Sergeant Imia." The woman eyed the Book in his hands. "Umm… I should be up-to-date. I'm usually very careful. The last fight I had was with the Amazon Mousse, and that was a sparring match in the park. There was no damage."
"Hello Konatsu," the Sergeant replied. "No, you are up to date, lad." Ueda gave a small start at that last word. "I need to speak with your Mistress."
"Is there any way I can give her a message?" the cross-dresser pleaded. "She was working at a city picnic in Akasaka all day yesterday. I had to run the restaurant myself."
"Oh?" Imia asked opening the Book to her page. "Is this because of the incident a few weeks back?"
"Yes, Sergeant," Konatsu replied.
"Good. I promised to stop by and check that she was working on her community service. Let her sleep lad. She's had nothing added since then." He watched as Konatsu let out a sigh. "You know, lad, you can probably do better. There are many women out there that would appreciate a house-broken lad like you."
"Thank you, Sergeant, but I'm happy enough," Konatsu answered.
The Sergeant shrugged his shoulders and walked away. "That's a GUY?" Ueda asked when they were out of earshot.
The Sergeant grinned at him, "Yep, and that effeminate cross-dresser is also one of the best ninjas in Tokyo. He could kill you and me forty times over before our bodies hit the ground from the first slice. That's your first lesson: Nothing is as it seems in Nerima – not even a person's sex. His boss is a lovely woman who insists on dressing like a man. 'Why?' is a very long story; ask me about it later some time."
"What did she do to get community service in Akasaka?" Ueda quizzed.
"She wrecked several hotels in Akasaka with two other women. The only reason she's not doing a couple years in jail is because one of her cohorts was Kodachi Kuno." The last name was pronounced with a great deal of bile.
"I take it the girl has money," Ueda commented.
"Yes. What's worse is her uncle has money. He reimbursed the hotels for their damages and managed to get the three girls off with probation and sixty hours of service."
"And you don't like him?" Ueda asked, but then saw the black look on the Sergeant's face and dropped the matter immediately.
The Sarge ignored the question and let the air clear. Then he led his new officer down one of the residential streets. He stopped at one particular house and opened a small notebook. "What's this one do?" Ueda asked.
"Actually, he's up to date. He's pretty good about confining the damage from his fights to stay within a dojo. However, he may have info on the fight last night. One warning: he's a bit gruff – don't take it personally. C'mon," the Sergeant answered him.
They walked up to the house, which was the last of a set of row houses, and knocked on the door, but there was no answer. "Let's go around the back," Imia said leading Ueda down a little side path. When they reach there, the second thing Ueda noticed was a large outdoor kiln dominating one end of the small yard. The *first* thing he noticed was a large man dominating the entire yard. The huge man had a large moon-face with big eyes and a slack jaw. "Hello, Doe," the Sarge yelled out in greeting. "I thought you'd be back in town. Finished the rounds did you?" The large man just nodded his head. "Mind if we have a word?"
Doe just shrugged his shoulders. Then the giant spied the large Book and gave an evil grin. "I'm not in the Book," he rumbled. "I'm not worried."
"Yes, you are – your page is just blank," Imia retorted. "Everyone is in the Book."
"Not the Doc," the giant challenged.
"Yes, he is and his page is not blank. Even he loses it now and then," Imia said smugly.
"Bull! Ono is the most level headed man I know," Doe stated.
The Sergeant sobered up a little. "Not when it comes to a man beating his wife in public…" he said with a sigh.
The giant seemed to consider that for a moment and grudgingly nodded agreement. Then he turned to a workbench behind him and looked to be carving something. Imia motioned for Ueda to follow him and went to stand off to the side of the workbench. Ueda stood a little behind the Sergeant. Imia noticed that Doe was carving a sign for the Tendo Dojo. "You were at the Tendo Dojo last week?"
"The week before," rumbled Doe. "I fought the Little Missy again for a bit, and then Himself stepped in when I got a hit on her. Between the two of them, they got to keep their sign."
"Poor Doe. Beaten by two teenagers again," Imia said with a smirk.
Doe turned to the Sergeant and tapped him on the forehead lightly. "You think you're so tough, *you* fight the two of them. By themselves, they are excellent fighters – I have trouble with either one of them. Together, they can take on any Destroyer in the world, especially since they've stopped bickering during fights. Now they just work together."
"They've stopped bickering?" The Sergeant was so surprised, he dropped his superior attitude.
Doe gave a short laugh. "While they are fighting someone else," he emphasized. "After the fight, Miss Tendo invited me for dinner, so I stayed. During dinner, the two were snipping and sniping at each other the whole time. It was like watching two wolf pups playing with each other – and about as serious anymore. There will be a wedding there within three years I'll bet."
"They are not brother and sister, then?" Ueda asked.
Doe looked at Imia with question marks in his eyes, so Imia answered him, "Doe, this is Officer Ueda. He just joined us today." Doe nodded at the man. Imia then answered Ueda's question: "The two teenagers in question were betrothed by their families. They hated each other on sight when they first met, but that's cooled considerably over the years. Now, they have gotten the families to back off and are actually dating willingly. When you meet them, you'll see why. If ever there was a case for soul mates, it's these two – whether they like it or not."
"Hmph," Doe agreed. "If their parents had left them alone from the beginning, they would have been married a year ago."
"So if they kept their sign, why are you making them a new one?" Imia asked.
Doe grinned at him. "Because Himself has one weakness – his huge ego. I pointed out how a lot of the dojos now had professional signs made. I said it was a shame that the Tendo Dojo didn't have one. He should look at the competition and see what folks were doing. After all, if he was going to have students in the near future, he'd have to stand out in every way."
Doe continued: "He thought about it for a bit and talked to the Little Missy later, and then the two of them came to me after dinner to learn more. I told him there was this one company that catered especially to dojos. During the conversation, the Little Missy put two and two together and made the jump to twenty-two. When she told Himself, the boy laughed for about half-an-hour. That's when we got down to some serious bargaining. Since they had no money to speak of, we worked out a barter arrangement. He came by after school twice this past week and worked on my roof. He did a good job too – it no longer leaks. Then the two of them spent yesterday gathering seven large barrels of clay and sealing them properly – I have enough material for my summer work now. He's promised to repair some of the walls inside of the house over the next two weeks as well. Once he does that, I'll give him the sign."
The Sergeant made a little more small talk with the giant and then got to the point. "Listen, Doe. Do you know anything about what happened at Yamamoto's work site last night? Looks like a fairly big rumble went down there?"
The Dojo Destroyer looked thoughtful for a second (at least as thoughtful as his moon-face ever looked anyway), then shook his head. "No – not that I talk to many of the dojos. You may want to try the Ghoul though. She is waiting for her heir to give up and go home, so she's been meddling to keep busy."
Imia made a face. "I'd rather talk to a real ghoul," he said.
"You and most of Nerima these days, but that's neither here nor there for me. I like Miss Tendo well enough, but I don't think the Ghoul had anything to do with her troubles," Doe answered him. With that, he turned his attention to the large kiln and began removing several beautiful clay pots, dismissing the two officers completely. Imia motioned to Ueda and they left without another word to the giant.
"Is he trustworthy?" Ueda asked as they continued their walk.
Imia shrugged his shoulders. "He doesn't care enough about the dojos in the city to lie. For that matter, he doesn't care enough about anything to bother lying. He lives for his handicrafts which is how he makes ends meet, a good meal, and the chance to trounce entire dojos – not necessarily in that order."
"Are all the martial artists like him?" Ueda asked. "If so, I'm starting to believe some of the rumors I've heard."
Imia laughed. "While the rumors you heard are probably true, no, he's not typical. There are over a fifty dojos across Nerima and yet there is no 'typical' Nerima martial artist. They do not share any common characteristics other than they all love a good fight – from the wildest to the most gentle, the largest to the smallest."
"Sounds a bit like the American Wild West. How do you keep control over them?"
"I won't tell you yet. Let's go meet a few more and see if you can figure it out," Imia challenged him.
A/N: Next - The Amazons and the Tendos