Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. I only borrow them, to try to tell the story behind the story. All for fun, not for profit.
Summary: I suppose you are not a bona fide fan fiction GSR writer until you write that 'how they got together story.' Trouble is, it's been done so well, so often, it's hard to come up with a new angle without stepping into the AU route. So here goes my try. This story starts in season 9, the episode, Leave Out All the Rest. Grissom seeks help from Lady Heather after he receives Sara's video message. The story then sets off on a Grissom-centric recounting of the relationship. It alternates between dialogue between Grissom and Heather and flashbacks, but all from his point of view. It touches on some early season moments, but really gets down to business in season five. Ultimately, Grissom learns some things about himself and Sara in the process that may save the relationship.
Chapter One: The Video Message
Gil Grissom was frozen as he watched the video flicker off his computer. The man was unaccustomed to feeling emotional, but he now found himself consumed and paralyzed by a frightening power.
Oh, sure, since Sara left, he noticed a little more empathy for victims creeping up to the surface. And, certainly, after Warrick's death, the empathy was palpable. Hell, he was even feeling empathy for suspects, pitiful souls caught by impulses that would ultimately destroy them just as they had destroyed lives around them.
The phone rang, the lab; he couldn't face another case right now. He started the video again. He hoped upon hope that the message had changed in that time.
Now, his cell started chirping. He focused on Sara's face on the computer. She says she's happy, has she moved on?
Next the beeper, and the home phone again. For the first time in a very long time, Gil Grissom put his personal life in front of the job. True, it was a baby step, but an important one. He remained focused on Sara and her message.
He restarted the video message for the eleventh time; trying to decipher another meaning, a cryptic call to meet her on the Sea Sheppard, a tiny hint that she really wasn't that happy, any glimmer of hope.
Not seeing what he so desperately sought, he answered the lab and headed out in a downpour to examine another ruined life. Thoughts swirled through his head, and his only hope was that this case would somehow ground him.
He arrived at the scene, and had to push himself to get out of the car and face it. If that wasn't hard enough, Catherine reminded him of the unprecedented manner in which he dodged the calls. His world was crashing down around him, and he was staring down at a disfigured, tortured corpse.
He finally settled into working the case. The procedure and routine ultimately had a calming effect, but, the case wasn't straightforward. In fact, it was downright baffling. It was made that much more difficult by the distraction which was sabotaging everything since Warrick died. Sara's video message was replaying in his mind when he was supposed to be examining the body at the morgue. He pinched his nose and shut his eyes to try to expel the vision.
"Another headache?" Nick asked out of concern.
"No," came the reply, with a concerted effort to refocus on the task at hand.
They congregated in the layout room with Doc Robbins going over the findings. The S&M theory was emerging, but with huge inconsistencies.
Grissom walked away. The answer wasn't in the layout room, period. A subconscious urge to seek expert opinion was the excuse, but truth be told, Grissom was driving around for hours trying to get the nerve to go to Heather Kessler's house for solace from his pain.
It was late; he rang the doorbell half expecting it to go unanswered. He flinched when the door flew open. Grissom went straight into lab geek mode and started in on the details of the case.
Lady Heather's response, "You've changed."
Damn, she sees that already, I'm toast.
Ignoring the comment, they continued to both catch up and trade thoughts about the case. Despite his attempts to keep his personal life at bay, Heather kept hitting the bull's eye, and ultimately unpleasant truths were discussed.
Sara tried to tell me it was over and now Heather is confirming it.
"You're here because this is the only place in Vegas that doesn't remind you of Sara, you can stay in my guest room as long as you like."
She led him to the well appointed room and watched him lay down fully clothed. As she started to exit, "Heather, will you stay?"
She knew the lost state he was in, and cautiously closed the door. Taking a seat in an occasional chair near the bed, "You need sleep more than anything else, what in the world did you have in mind?"
He shrugged weakly, "Sara's trying to tell me it is over, and now you are, I guess I'm trying to move on."
Heather laughed softly, "Your heart's clearly not ready for that tack."
"Then help me, Heather." His face bore the intense sadness he was feeling, "I've never felt this before; I just don't think I know how to handle it."
"First of all, stop acting like you are the only one in the world who has suffered a broken heart. In fact, consider yourself lucky that you made it this far without ever having felt that pain."
"If you are trying to console me, those words are not having the desired effect," he fired back, more in line with his usual character.
"Sorry, I thought a little tough love might bring you back a bit."
He rolled his eyes and folded his arms.
"I would really like you to tell me how it is you and Sara finally got together after so long. I think that might help me understand your relationship, but more importantly, it will be helpful for you to open up about that."
"Helpful how?" he sounded skeptical.
"Talking things out can unburden a person. I'll bet you've never had to do that in your life, but it works. It is how therapists make a living, for the most part. You will surely learn a thing or two about how you arrived where you are. It can be a very revealing process."
Grissom thought on the remarks of the therapist the department brought in after Warrick's death. When he inquired about his uncharacteristic distraction, she informed him that the only way to have it go away was to talk about it. Well, that sounded like a load of hooey at the time, but the same strategy was being raised again to help him deal with Sara.
Talking about his personal life was not something that Gil Grissom found helpful. Quite the opposite, it made him down right uncomfortable, even for a long time afterward. Being told that he needed to do it to make himself fell better only made him feel like a kid made to drink some awful tasting medicine to get well.
"Awright," he sat up, "but, I'm not at all convinced about this psycho babble stuff."
"Ok, well, glad you cleared that up," Heather couldn't hide her amusement.
"Where do I start?"
"How about you begin," she paused for emphasis, "…at the beginning."
tbc...
a/n: Just setting up the story with chapter one, please check back in for more.