The Letter
Rain. Storm. Typical Seattle. One of those days you just want to stay at home and watch TV or read, but of course everything is against you on those days. Owen got a 911 page and had to rush to the hospital. He was always eager to work, help people, but today he didn`t feel quite right. He forced himself out of the house, somehow through the terrible rain got to the hospital. Just as he entered the hospital he was told to join Meredith in the OR2 for a surgery. He quickly changed into scrubs and rushed to the OR. Surgery went well and after three hours of hard work they were done.
"Are you ok?" Meredith asked as they were walking towards the attendings room.
"Yeah, I`m fine." Owen answered casually.
"You don`t look fine." Meredith pushed. Owen didn`t answer. "Owen?"
"You know what, I`m not fine. I`m miserable, I`m sad, I`m broken. I`m ready to give up on everything." Owen said angrily.
"Owen." Meredith tried to calm him down.
"Don`t. I need to be left alone." Owen said and left shocked Meredith in the middle of the hallway.
Sun. Ocean. Typical LA. It was a beautiful day to spend on the beach, but Amelia didn`t want to go out. As much as Addison tried to convince Amelia, she was unbreakable and stayed at home. She turned the TV on, but was not paying any attention to it, her mind was thousands miles away. She had all the time to think over the last events between Owen and her. She was calm and for the first time in two months she felt confident about her decision of leaving Seattle and Owen. She needed time and space to process the fact that Owen was heartbroken finding out that Amelia didn`t want a baby. To be honest, she wanted to have a baby, she was just afraid. She wanted to have a big, happy family with Owen more than anything, but she couldn`t find enough courage to tell Owen that she was scared that her baby will not have a brain again, so she just run away. That was her thing, she was not proud of it, but it was what she had always done when she felt scared.
The rain had stopped, but it was still chilly. Owen got home late at night, tired from his shift and couldn`t wait to go to bed. He turned the lights on and froze in his place as if he had seen a ghost.
"Hey."
"Hey." Owen said still frozen in his place.
"How are you doing?" Amelia asked, not knowing what else to say.
Owen didn`t answer.
Amelia was not expecting this kind of behavior from Owen. She was not sure what was she looking for, but not this for sure. Owen was cold and icy. She had never seen him like that.
"Owen can we talk?" Amelia tried to melt the ice.
"About what?" Owen barked finally.
"About…" Amelia was taken aback from Owen`s anger. "…about what happened between us." Amelia finished lump forming in her throat.
"Not much happened. You just told me you don`t want a baby and run away for two months, leaving me a letter." Owen has risen his voice. "A fucking letter!"
"I`m sorry." Amelia muttered.
"And that is it? You are sorry." Owen threw his hands in the air.
"Owen…" Amelia started, but Owen cut her off.
"Two months Amelia. Two months without knowing where you were, how you were doing. Two months of constant thinking that I did something to push you away. Two months of pain. Two months of misery and you are just sorry?" Owen was shouting now.
Amelia had never seen Owen so angry and desperate. Now she knew how much she had hurt him and she felt terrible for that.
"Owen now I`m back, I`m ready to start new life. I`m ready to tell you everything and I hope you are ready to hear it all and understand my reasons. These past two months were not easy for me too, so you are not the only one who felt miserable." Amelia shouted back.
Amelia`s angry voice seemed to pull Owen from his bubble of hurt.
"Alright Amelia, tell me what is going on, because really I don`t understand you. One minute you want five kids, next you don`t even want one. So tell me what is happening?" Owen said and crossed his arms.
Amelia took a deep breath and sat on the coach.
"Remember I told you about my baby, who lived for forty minutes, he was born without a brain." Amelia stopped for a second to pull her thoughts together. Owen hated seeing her upset, but he let her continue. "After his death I didn`t want another baby, because I didn`t want to go through the pain of losing a baby again. Meeting you changed me, all I wanted was to have a big and happy family with you. I know you`ll be a great father and I know how much you love and want a baby. I was ready, or as I though, I was ready to start a family with you. When I found out about possibly being pregnant I got scared. What if the baby would not have a brain again. Owen you can`t imagine how scared I was. When we did a test and it showed only one line I was relieved, although I know you were heartbroken. I wanted to tell you about all of this, but I was sure you`d hate me for being such a cold hearted about all of this, so I run away to have some time to think. I`m sorry Owen for hurting you." Amelia was not able to speak anymore as tears run down her cheeks.
Owen was still standing his arms crossed. He was trying to fully understand what Amelia just told him. His heart broke once again for Amelia and for himself. He was in owe with Amelia, it must have been so hard for her to go through this all alone. He was also proud that he has such a strong woman next to him.
Silence feel over the room, for couple of minutes neither of them spoke. One was relieved to tell everything that was bothering her for months, the other was trying to process all he had just heard.
"Amelia." Owen broke the silence. "I`m sorry that you had to go through all this alone, sorry for not being a good husband and a friend for you. I wish you had told me this earlier."
"I couldn`t, I was not ready. I didn`t know how to tell you this." Amelia said through tears.
Owen walked towards Amelia and pulled her into a hug.
"I love you and you are the most important person in my life. I`ll always be here for you no matter what." Owen pulled back and kissed her.
The kiss. Familiar lips. Familiar bodies. It was nice to be home.
"I love you too Owen."
The End