Hello again. I'm back on the same things as usual. I'm loyal to the Wolf... And I'm fading to Black. Leave me reviews please.
Chapter 1: Tell Me How
She thought he was beautiful. Not so much in the traditional sense considering his tattoos and affinity for motorcycles and cars, but beautiful in his warm brown eyes, dark hair, 6'8" frame and giant dork personality.
He was her everything. And she was just something to him. A great friend or something. She loved him and she knew it was inevitable.
Tom could definitely be a grouch like his character on TV, but most of the time he was cracking jokes and getting into shit like a little punk ass kid. Those times were some of her favorite times. He'd taken her to her get her first tattoo. They'd spent countless hours fighting over music while road tripping; and quiet hours sharing parts of themselves to the walls in the darkness of their often shared hotel rooms.
They were surprisingly close. Close enough they were often mistaken as a couple. Close enough that after a while, they'd both stopped denying they were just friends. Her heart soared at the possibilities, but she never spoke anything of it.
And then they kissed. The affection ratcheted up. There was no need to speak on their situation. It just was.
They were content in each other. She wanted more. He wanted someone else. And in the blink of an eye, everything changed. There was avoidance. There was distance. There was silence. There was an unexplained gaping hole. There was a Wrestlemania moment. There was call up. There was an engagement. There was a wedding.
There was love there, but not for her.
She tried to be happy for him; for them. She tried being cordial, but he kept his distance as if he'd fall back in.
There always seemed to be some kind of gathering at a bar and grill of some sort when a ton of WWE employees got together. Since she had accepted her job there, it was a regular occurrence. Usually it was just some of the NXT roster, but with a joint pay per view and a NXT Takeover event, almost the entire gang was there.
She noticed Baron's big body almost immediately. She'd spent plenty of nights wrapped in him and him in her. Seeing him stirred emotions in her, leaving her feeling raw and exposed. As she walked in further she noticed he wasn't alone.
Alcohol, she needed alcohol.
After two drinks to calm herself and some appetizers, she had the courage to approach the couple and ask Tom if she could talk to him outside.
"I miss you." She whispered, keeping her eyes downcast.
He ran his hand over his mouth and chin sighing, "I miss you too."
He turned to her lifting her face. She stared at him; through him. He pulled her in, hugging her to his larger body.
"Are you happy?" She spoke holding him around the waist resting her head on his collarbone.
"Yeah."
She pulled away, breaking the embrace she'd been longing for. She loved him... Still. She shook her head, laughing shakily. She focused on her feet.
"What's wrong?" He reached out towards her before dropping his hand back at his side.
"Nothing," She shook her head again looking straight ahead, "A lot of things have changed. I don't wanna overstep any boundaries." She stepped back further leaning against a wall.
He moved to stand next to her. Close enough to touch but far enough apart that they looked like old friends.
They were quiet for a long time.
"I'm happy for you, ya know?"
"Yeah? You'd be the worst kind of friend if you weren't." He lightly teased.
She rolled her eyes, "I mean, we spent nights talking about you being a champion. About that call up. About all of that."
He ran his hand down his face again. They'd talked about way more than that. His heart pulled at the nostalgic tone of her voice. He glanced at her. Missing all of what she had said except, "I'm so proud of you."
He smirked as she turned slightly to look at him.
Fuck, she had missed that. She faced straight ahead again.
"It's been a hell of a ride," He reflected, "Weird without you."
"You're in the big leagues now."
"That's true, but that's not all that I meant."
She stiffened before turning to stare at him.
"I didn't expect you to show, but that stung a bit when I realized you hadn't."
She chuckled mirthlessly, feeling tears sting her eyes, "I couldn't." Her voice broke as she looked away. She wouldn't do this. Not in front of him.
He moved closer to her. His arm brushing hers.
"I didn't mean to hurt you." He spoke quietly.
She smiled sadly, "I didn't mean to fall in love with you either." She sniffled, quickly swiping at her eyes moving away from him.
He frowned at her admission. He had always known, but hearing it come from her made him anxious. And now having it sound like it was a mistake stung him. She was holding on to the possibility of him while he was holding on to the possibility of someone better.
"I'm sorry. I don't really know what else I can say."
She shrugged, facing him. "But you're happy?"
"Yeah."
She wasn't convinced, "That's all that matters then."
"What about you? Are you happy?"
Her feet were interesting again.
"You know you can be honest with me. You don't have to smile in my face and pretend everything is alright. You don't have to fake it with me."
"I'm fine."
"That's not what I asked you."
She shrugged, "I'm fine." She crossed her arms, resting them on her stomach, avoiding eye contact.
He finally pushed off the wall to stand in front of her. He cupped her face in his large hands like he had so many times in the past. She dropped her arms staring up at him. He pressed his forehead to hers.
"You're stubborn as hell. Anyone ever tell you that?"
"Only you."
"It's still true."
"Yeah, well..." She trailed off.
"You used to say I loved it."
"Did you?"
He pulled back slightly, searching her face. Her question hung in the air between them.
"You can say no. It wouldn't surprise me." She gently tugged at his wrists, holding his hands briefly before letting them go.
He was quiet. He stared at her for a long time.
"It wasn't the same kind of love." He blurted finally after the extended silence.
That same humorless laugh escaped her as she nodded, "It never is. And every time it isn't, I wonder what it feels like to be in love with someone who is in love with me too." She stood blinking back tears.
"Fuck, I-"
"No, don't. It's fine. I'm fine. I'm gonna head back inside." She roughly wiped at her face leaving him outside.
"Did you have a good talk? I know you guys were close." His wife asked as he rejoined her.
He shrugged his broad shoulders.
"It'll get back to normal between you guys, babe."
He gave his wife a brief peck. He looked around catching his old friend's eyes. She lifted her drink towards him slightly before downing the liquid.
He returned the gesture as his wife crashed into his larger body kissing him, making him smile.
She saw the interaction between them, but had to look away for her own sake.
Fuck, she had missed feeling that.
She loved him, still.
Over and out... Kind of.