Niffster's Request
A/N you asked for it. MUHAHAHA!
Sean was tossing and turning. His night disturbed by perturbing dreams involving Paul and a shovel when suddenly everything changed and he found himself sitting in a classroom.
"What the…?" Sean asked himself, taking in the pink clouds floating outside the windows and Mr. Waldon writing on the board as he was dressed in a tutu and tights. Sean shuddered. "I am so not liking this…" And then he felt someone tapping him on the shoulder. Sean turned his head, half expecting to see Suze dressed only in a loincloth but was met with the sight of Kelly. Kelly Prescott, the dumbest, blondest (A/N no offense!) girl in the school, and she was dressed in a suit?
"Sean, I have been expecting you," Kelly stated, readjusting her glasses –where did they come from? She brushed her pencil skirt and swept imaginary dust off her shoulder-padded jacket and proceeded to set up a graph in front of him. Sean just sat there gapping.
"Um, is this a weird dream version of the Matrix?" Sean asked completely and utterly confused.
"I can assure you this is no… Matrix," Kelly answered, her nose wrinkling as though she had swallowed something bitter and nasty (A/N I'm thinking lemon). "I was called upon to help you understand the precarious position you are in. It has been brought to my superiors' attention and therefore mine that you are still caught and obsessed with the ridiculous notion that you are in any way about to win Miss. Simon's affection or be present among any lustful thoughts she might have. This graph," and Kelly pointed at the superb graph with color coordinates and no pencil smudges, "is here to help you comprehend the fruitlessness of your dreams."
Sean was started to feel angry. He had no chances with Suze? He started to get up to yell that he was hot and yeah, he might not be Paul-freaking- Slater who had big issues and a flashy sports car but he was a handy bloke.
As if sensing Sean's irritation and short-fuse temper, Kelly raised her hand and frowned at him. Sean, feeling slightly like a reprimanded four year old sat himself down again and glared at the floor which was somehow covered with graffiti; all of them variations of S P LUV. He felt like someone was trying to send him a message but what?
The blonde sighed and snapped her fingers to gain Sean's attention once more and smiled graciously if a bit thinly when it was returned to her.
"As I was saying, you have no chances with Susannah, you are the less fit specimen and the laws of survival dictate that you do not gain the advantage or possess anything remarkable, practical or interesting but scrape at the end of the barrel and content yourself with… nothing." Kelly finished blandly, scowling as if upset that she couldn't find any better word to state the futility and the consequences of Sean's unsurprising or basic form.
Sean tried to defend himself but was shushed immediately. Kelly then started to point out things on the amazing graph that resembled very much that done by Mr. Slater in biology yesterday; it was rather eerie. And as she was making what were probably excellent points, and giving what were probably very persuasive examples, Sean just sat there blearily and focused on the growing sensation of uselessness that was shrouding him. Finally he snapped out of it when Kelly proposed to show him "a footage of Mr. Slater and Miss. Simon and the perfect example of what true chemistry in fact is". He quickly nodded his head no and sighed in relief when she shrugged and returned to her arguments with a very business-like attitude.
After what felt like forever, Paul finally saw everything fading and he could hear Kelly's voice shouting at him that it was foolish and he should give up his "pathetic, unflattering and very humiliating crush" and that was all he remembered.
Sean woke up to a glaringly bright light and quickly dressed himself and glanced at the mirror; he looked horrible. And that dream… that was just plain weird. So he left for school and spotted Suze with her friends and ran the opposite direction leaving her puzzled and rather vexed.
"I don't get it, I mean we were getting along fine, except for, you know…" Suze was complaining to her friend Cee-Cee who looked at her knowingly.
"The Paul-Slater lusty looks factor?" She inquired with a smirk.
Susannah looked outraged and then rolled her expressive green eyes, "… Well, yeah." And neither noticed Paul Slater standing behind them smirking his ass off.
As they walked away, Kelly Prescott walked up toward Paul looking puzzled, instead of her usual leery self.
"Paulie-baby, why is that idiot Scott or whatever, always looking at me that way? He kepts staring at me like I'm the freak he is! Doesn't he know that my ass looks better than his face could ever hope to be?" Kelly nagged while Paul laughed.
"Dunno, babe. Want
me to go beat him up?" Paul inquired, hoping his hopeful tone was
not obvious. Kelly smiled delightfully and nearly cooed. "Oh, it
means so much to me that you would even think about it!"
Kelly looked mischevious then.
"Want to find a cupboard? I've
got ten minutes before class…" She flashed her eyelashes at him.
As the two walked away Paul couldn't help thinking that dream-projecting might be the shifter's best powers.
A/N the ass thingy is a shout-out to 'She's the Man'.
Read and Review, or else.. lol