Rhythm Emotion Cycle

Empathy

This is the second instalment in what I'm calling the Rhythm Emotion Cycle. Apathy is the first, it is a 2x5 fic. This is a side-fic, happening before and during Apathy, but in a different place. This follows Heero and Quatre instead of Wufei and Duo. And it can be considered stand alone, so you don't have to read Apathy if you don't want to.

~{*}~

"Please excuse my enemies, I think they do not know;

"I will gladly self destruct, if they leave me alone.

"Friend, that's the end of us,

"Because you're behind in empathy and overdue in trust."

If and When We Rise Again, by Streetlight Manifesto

"I'm already incomplete- I know you will cover me.

"Broken by your empathy- I know you will cover me.

"I've been lyin' here for weeks- I know you will cover me.

"Inside out and in between- And I know you will cover me."

Medicate, by Breaking Benjamin

~{*}~

Empathy: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner

~~~~~{*}~~~~~

Chapter One

Operation: Soul Search

(About two weeks before the beginning of Apathy)

"Heero," Relena smiled brightly at him, holding out her hand. "Come say hi to Ambassador Kai-Lin."

That was how it started. Just one simple command, and now his name was once again linked with Relena's in 'Gossip Daily'.... again. Usually, Heero Yuy didn't concern himself with his public image, or with anything much at all. But when it affected his work by bringing reporters to his home, to his office, when it restricted his ability to move freely and quietly... that was it.

Relena was not a bad person. He liked her, she was a wonderful person. She just wanted *him* and he didn't want to be hers. He admitted he may have lead her on a little bit, but in his defense he hadn't known he was doing so. At least not until she'd informed the media they were engaged two years ago. That should have been the last straw, but she'd begged and pleaded with him- and as always, he'd relented.

But no more. Armed with nothing but a magazine with several *untrue* stories about him and his own forceful personality, he took off for Commander Une's office, ignoring everyone on his way.

Abigail, the meek little girl Une called a secretary, just cowered out of the way when he barged upt to the office, glaring daggers at anyone who dared say anything to him.

"I can't take this anymore," Heero snapped at his commanding officer as the brunette looked up when her door slammed open. "Look... I think Relena needs a new bodyguard."

"It's either her or deskwork," Une replied, hopping to have the former soldier repent and rethink. She knew how... relentless... the Vice Foreign Minister could be, but she'd also rather have Heero protecting her than anyone else. Despite his vow to never fire a gun, he'd proven himself *quite* capable of handling the job without using firepower.

"Then I'll take the damned desk," he growled. Une sighed, knowing that the 01 pilot was as stubborn as she. And knowing that if she put him at a desk, she'd loose one of her best agents. And over all of this, she had a rather motherly attitude towards the poor boy.

"Fine. I'll bring in Agent Cortez and set him there instead. Happy?"

"Ecstatic," was the dry response. Une sighed again. It had been five years since the last war, and a little over four since Heero had returned and become a Preventers agent. She'd held hopes that maybe Heero would mellow a bit, settle into peace and become not so solitary.

Oh, he'd changed a bit over the years. Surely. If anything, he'd become more of a loner, he'd become more volatile. He was a bit more vocal than he had been.... but considering the things that came out of his mouth Une debated on weather that was a good thing or not.

Time had come for Intervention. Something needed to change. Either his attitude... or something else. She could not go on working with an agent like this.

"Heero... you're not happy here. Just say it. The Preventers has lost it's appeal for you, hasn't it?"

The former pilot of the Wing Zero sighed, and Une caught just a hint of sadness flashing through those dark blue eyes.

"I'm.... bored," he said at last. "And Relena is driving me crazy. I mean, I like her and all... but this is out of hand. I thought she'd get over it by now."

Une shrugged. "Relena is... tenacious. She sets her sights on something and doesn't give up til she gets it. Its a good thing to have in the leader of our government... but it's a bad thing for you. Now... I'm going to give you four weeks paid leave. You haven't taken a vacation since you started to work here. I want you to rest... and use this time to think about what you really want. What you want in life... and if you're going to find that here. Will you do that for me?"

Heero looked about to object, but Une held up a hand.

"I can make that a command if you like. Just think of it as another mission. Operation: Soul-search, if you like." she added with a small smirk.

"Four weeks? What am I going to do... sit at my apartment all month?"

"Ah, it's a vacation, Heero. Go somewhere. You don't even have to stay on Earth. Go to the colonies. Do something. I heard that Quatre Winner is giving a gala on L4 this weekend. A charity event for the Maxwell Orphanage. I'm pretty sure you got an invite."

Heero nodded. He didn't actually think Quatre had personally sent the invite, since he hadn't talked to the blond Sandrock pilot in over three years. Rather, he assumed that all of the former Gundam pilots, and their comrades from the wars were on some sort of mailing list and got invites to nearly every function he held. Quatre Raberba Winner was a very busy man. No time for reminiscing on times everyone would rather forget.

"I guess," Heero said. He hadn't planned on going. He was forced to attend so many black-tie events- why volunteer to go to one? But, It would be nice to see space again. It had been awhile. And maybe, he might find some of his old comrades. See how they were doing.

Might as well, he figured. What was the worst that could happen? (1)

*Five days later*

Heero stared down at the two green bags. One was just a small, regular sized duffle bag. The other was slightly larger. The larger held most of what he'd need for his the rest of his three and a half week vacation- during which he didn't plan to return to Earth. The smaller held one change of clothes, a pair of sneakers, and a few other essentials. As he stared at the bags, he turned something over and over in his hands. It was smooth, with dull sort of sheen to it. Polished wood, carved into a smooth oval and threaded on a leather strip. It was relatively smooth, and he remembered back to last week, when he'd received it.

He'd been on a mission with Isabelle- one of the few agents who could put up with him- and who he could stand. It was to Tibet; aparently, someone was brewing some drug there that the preventers didn't want them to brew. Heero'd gone along as the brains, Belle as the brawn. It had been several years... but he'd never broken his vow not to fire any weopan again. Hence the need for Belle Rivers... aka Agent

For some reason, several people thought they were 'partners' in a romantic sense. There was only one person who didn't. Some monk at a monestary they passed through.

And Heero had no idea of the old man's name.

Heero closed his eyes as the memory came back.

~Flashback~

"Why the hell does everyone think I'd have sex with you?" Belle demanded, her gray eyes flashing.

"I should be insulted," Heero growled at her. "But since I feel the same about you... I'm not."

Belle made a rude noise, but then she turned contemplative. "I mean, Yuy, it's not like you're ugly or anything. It's just... I prefer my men with a little more humor, y'know? Not so hostile."

"And I..." Heero paused. He really didn't know what he preferred in his women. He liked Relena. She was beautiful, and she had a great personality for the most part... but he didn't want to have sex with her. The same for Belle. Her cool gray eyes, sleek black hair. She was trim, slender. Fit. And she could put up with him. Dish his crap right back to him. But he didn't want to have sex with her. So... did that mean that beautiful women with great personalities weren't his type? What was his type?

"Love has no flight-plan. It charts it's own course," came a voice from behind them.

"Wise words from a wise man?" Belle asked. The monk bowed to them.

"Your heart is pure, young lady. Love will come for you in time."

"Thought we were talking about sex?" she asked, non-plussed. None had ever accused her of having tact or a sense of decorum.

"Sex means little without love," was the reply. The monk looked at Heero.

"And you." Beady black eyes narrowed on him. "You are a magnet for emotions, son. They follow you, they seek you out. Both the good and the bad. They will destroy you in the end, if you can't find a way to balance them."

"And how do I do that?" Heero asked.

The monk removed a necklace, a simple leather thong with a small oval of polished wood on it, and placed it in Heero's hand.

"Only you know how," he said, then turned and left.

~End Flashback~

Heero turned the oval over once again, then on a whim, tied the thong around his neck and dropped the charm down his shirt.

What harm could it do?(2)

AN:1&2: One day, people are going to learn NOT to ask that?

This is a little on the short side, but it sets up for the rest of the story. So, hold of judgement for another chapter or so, kay? But please review anyway... I like to know people are reading.