City of Crete, three years before DmC3.

"Where the hell is my past self?"

Winding deep within the heart of the dark alleys of the night-neon, bustling metropolis Crete, a woman peeks past a wall, scrawled with fading graffiti, into its seemingly endless tunnels—spiralling like pig intestines.

There was nothing notable about the woman at all. Not beautiful or sexy and the rather plump figure moved with a slightly sluggish swagger. Perhaps a little bit of an eccentric aura as her neck stuttered back and forth like a turtle as she scanned the alleys with her sheepish gaze, but that was all that drew the passerby's attention ere they turned it back to the road.

"Aw, c'mon! Pull yourself together, Tamakazura! It's day one and you're already wound up like this…"

Somewhere on the other side of the city…

A lump, laying on the road, which appeared to be a dead body at first glance, was moving—gathering its fleshy self together and, with some difficulty, got up on two legs as she trembled. She breathed heavily, the bangs she clipped behind an ear falling lightly over her eyebrows again.

"Ah…ah…must…draw myself together…HURRF!"

She almost threw up in a second, but luckily didn't actually hurl it out. This street was somewhat distanced from the dark alleys, but not too far. The people walking past her also threw her strange looks.

"Ah…ah…thank God…" She looked around. "Dammit, where's my future self?"

"Tamakazura! Tamakazura!"

"Huh?!"

The plump woman suddenly spun around, her glasses flashing under the streetlights, at the call of her name. "Who is it? Is it Tamakazura? It's me, Tamakazura!"

Without hesitation she followed the sound, diving into the intestines of dark alleys.

"Hey! Tamakazura! What the hell is this place? How…how did we come here all of a sudden? Did we fail it?!"

She felt a chilling presence, like the air froze around her, but whipped by quickly. "Tamakazura! Is that you?"

And she heard the footsteps, tapping on the metallic foundations of the city. Cold, but quiet, with a measured ambience.

"H-huh?!"

A shadow gradually appeared from behind the artificial city smoke. It was a man, clad in robes of catalina blue woven with golden seams. His silvery hair was stroked back in spikes of elegance, and his face was calm and beautiful. It seemed as cold as his steps; but his eyes were even more devoid of emotion. Every movement of his was subdued, as if there was a suffocating but freeing aura about him, all at once.

The woman stopped, and stared at the handsome creature, astonished. The man's eyes flickered and looked at her. He stopped.

"E-eh? Wh-why…er…"

Blushing, Tamakazura fought to retain her feminine instincts as she stood on the spot grinning like an idiot.

Suddenly she heard the unsheathing of a blade, and the figure, lighter than feathers and more terrible than nightmares, drew down a slash of blue before her eyes, his eyes still devoid of any human lustre.

"K-KYYYYYYAAAAAAAAA!"

Tamakazura could already feel the coolness of her limbs being dispatched from her body, and the impending pain was temporarily overtaken by the world's worst coldness. Yet she heard another shriek that was not hers, and gaining strength after the moment had passed, raised her face from her cowardly arms—just in time to see something black and inky explode, dissipating into the air. Still barely aware that she was alive, not even daring to breathe, she turned back slowly to see a sword sheathed on the man's back.

The man exhaled deeply.

"U-uh, th-th-th-thanks," she stuttered.

The man made no sign that he heard her, and walked away.

Tamakazura blushed even more deeply.

"Uggghhh…y'know, I think that's my type of—"

"What the hell are you doing here, idiot?!"

The other woman ran up to her clumsily, stepping into deep puddles and her arms moved like she was wading.

"You fool! I thought I told you not to move!"

"Ah, but, Tamakazura…"

"It's very dangerous here. I think something went wrong with my contraption. I crashed into something and landed…this…who even knows where we are now?! And don't stand around blinking like an idiot! Why do you look as if you just found the mushroom kingdom?!"

"Tama…kazura-san…the reason is…I just fell in love."

"You what?! We just crash landed in the middle of space zone nowhere and you're thinking of erotica?! That's it, that's it, I always thought you were stupid, but now I know you're not just stupid, you're stunted. You foolish woman!"

"Ah! Ah! Tamakazura! How can you say that! I am your past self! If you think I'm stupid—"

"—but you are my past self from a parallel universe! I'm not surprised we're polar opposites…enough as it is…where you lack in brains, I have in excess. No wonder I'm so highly regarded for my intelligence where I come from."

"Oh, Tamakazura…you break my poor little heart."

The woman scoffed, and spun around. "First, I will need to reassemble the device. Then, once we have the ticket outta here, we will go look for my parents again—and in time, stop them from ever leaving each other. Once our plan comes to fruition, we will return to our time—or, at least, the place we call home—the imperial court of Heian. The things I need are…"

The other woman crept up to the first in a cowardly but not uncute way. "B-but Tamakazura, what can I do…?"

"You can stay in a hotel and lock the door from inside until I reassemble the device!"

"…Yes, my future self."

Satisfied, Tamakazura the first withdrew her gun barrel from her past self's forehead, and spun it back into the sheathe. Tamakazura the second, with an even more sheepish gaze than the first, stared at her future self's silhouette in the frozen, dusky moon of this city.

"Oh…oh…my future self is so intelligent~ If only I had but a tenth of her intelligence, then—" Unable to contain herself any longer, Tamakazura the second slurped as she inhaled and began to lick her fingers, stroking from the palm to the delicious tip of each. She also followed the first like a dog, disappearing in the city fog.