I was different from the moment I said my first words, to the moment I took my first step and the moment I got my first tattoo .

How have I come to this?

My mother abhorred the very thought of me. I shut my eyes trying to stop the tears from creeping there way down my face.

My eyes open and I choked out another sob. Maybe if I wasn't so different my mother would love me . Maybe if I was lighter my mom would be able to stand me or maybe If I could bite my tongue I wouldn't make here cry anymore.

I looked down at my pouty lips .How I cursed these lips .it was as though my mind was created to be as brutally blunt as it could be . Sympathy was something I prayed for. I stared at my self in the reflection ,looking at my dark forest green eyes as the tears started falling down my dull caramel skin .I looked down at my tatted arms that barely showed the hints of untainted skin .

"She doesn't hate you"

A voice echoed behind me knocking me out of my thoughts.

I turned seeing my precious older sister . I quickly wrapped her into a hug letting her words sink in. Letting her lies sink in. Bella was the only person that saw me at my weak,she was the one person that I could tell my all to without any judgment .

I looked up at her trying to find anything identical about us and couldn't . Unlike her long deep waves of brown hair my hair was wild and unruly. With thick curls that spiraled down my back bella had deep brown doe like eye's that seemed to look through your soul.

Unlike my tattoos that permeated my body she had not a blemish in sight excluding the one butterfly on her collarbone that we had both got, it was our first tattoo, her last .

Her skin that looked like snow on a Christmas night clashed with my exotic golden skin. Bella unlike me was more awkward to an almost innocent way .the only similar thing we had were our petite bodies that had a curve to our waist . Our breast sat at a perked c-cup. People often wondered how my tiny body could indure such tattoos,hell I often wondered the same.

"I'm sorry"

I croaked out "I'm sorry for bringing you in to this ".

Bella was my mothers favorite she adored her she put bella on a pedastel so high it sometime suffocated my brunette beauty. Anything bad that happened in my or bellas life were often blamed on me ,the black sheep."I've been wanting to leave for sometime now " she whispered rubbing my head and slow strokes.

"so technically I'm using you as my escape goat".the statement was harsh yet I couldn't help but smile .Bella wasn't someone who could be blunt without feeling bad, and I admired her for that . we were different yet she was able to be selfish and blunt with me we accepted each other for ourselves and nothing else.

It was thirty minutes till the planes departure,and we were all saying our goodbyes. I rolled my eyes at the cliche of it all . Here was my mother holding my sister as if she didn't want to let bells go . "You don't have to do this" she whispered in bell's ear .

It may have sounded sincere in many eyes but to me it all was a farce. The moment my mother found Phil we hindered her . She couldn't go the places she wanted because she couldn't abandon her children . But of course she has to play the sad mother card .

"It's okay mom,i think it's for the best". Bella smiled a sad smile yet you could almost see happiness and her eyes.

My eyes widened as I felt my mother arms wrap around me .

slowly my eyes closed taking in the warmth of my mothers affection I didn't know that this felt so good . It was as if I could sleep in her arms for the rest of my life .

"I'm sorry"

her voice broke the trance I was in . Slowly I looked into here eyes and said the first thing I could think of

"no your not" she roughly pushed me off of her as she hurriedly walked away it was then that I saw it . My mother didn't hate me. She feared me she was scared to show me warmth in fear of rejection . And before I knew what I was doing my feet rushed to hers and I held her broader back to my bosoms . "I love you" I said loudly "I love you for everything you've tried to do for me " . It was then that she broke down falling to the floor .

I held her swallowing the lump in my throat . I would not let anyone see me cry anyone see me weak.

"Well that was a show to watch" bella said "I told you she loved you" .

Bella thought my mother could do no wrong she felt as though my mother was perfect and That's the very reason why bella had to leave .

"shut the fuck up" I sneared at her "let's smoke this shit before Charlie come " she smiled that awkward smile that she gets whenever I curse.

linking our arms together we went into the bathroom to smoke this gram. This would be a long journey .

Let's hope we stir some shit up.

Hi I'm a bit new to this so please any criticisms you have let them show . If you guys have any ideas for the next chapter or story itself just tell me

don't forget to

R&R