Chapter 1

Chords on a Circle

They were separated by the expanse of the Oval Office carpet. Olivia was nearest to the desk and the President was at the other end between the two plush sofas. Their gazes spoke volumes though they uttered not a word. After standing there for what seemed like an eternity, the President motioned for Olivia to join him on the sofa as he took a seat. He was a vision of power and poise in his dark blue suit. The flag pin on his lapel seemed to wink at her.

"Livy, thank you for coming. Please have a seat."

Olivia sat on the sofa facing the President, knowing it would be inappropriate to sit next to him. She wasn't sure if she could resist the urge to touch him. It had been 14 days since she tendered her resignation. Frankly, she was surprised that Fitz hadn't attempted to contact her before now. Leaving her job and leaving Fitz had been the hardest thing she had done in her life thus far. Having to explain to everyone why she left so early into the presidency was a chore. It had only been two weeks, but the countless calls, e-mails, and texts from nosey staffers asking about her departure was grating on her nerves. Her stock response was usually: "It was always my intention to start my own consulting firm. Working on the campaign was an honor and a privilege."

She had cleaned out her office and all her mementos from the trail…pictures, magnets, the bobble head dolls, posters, and t-shirts. They now held up residence in one of her guest rooms. In moments of weakness she wore one of Fitz's undershirts to bed. It was an undershirt that he had hastily left behind in her hotel room at the Atlanta Hyatt during a national campaign stop. Even after washings, it still held his scent probably because she willed it to.

Now here she sat at 8:30 on a Tuesday morning after being summoned 2 hours earlier by Secret Service agents, Tom and Hal. She had been on the phone arguing with Stephen for about an hour.

"Liv, I keep reviewing the numbers and…we won't meet payroll for 5 employees, pay the lease on all that office space we want, and our liability insurance. This doesn't include all our other expenses, it's impor-," said Stephen before Olivia interrupted.

"Calm down, Stephen. The owner of the building owes me a favor and will waive our lease for 6 months. I won't take a salary until we get more clients." She frowned at the sound of three swift knocks on the door.

"Who's knocking on your door at 6:30 in the morning?" Olivia's heart skipped a beat. She pulled back the peephole door, and saw two Secret Service agents.

She supplied Stephen with a hasty excuse for the knocking and promptly hung up, not quite understanding why she lied to him. He knew about their relationship and provided a necessary diversion for her as they both threw themselves into setting up what she was calling Olivia Pope and Associates. When she opened the door, two stoic looking men stared at her. They were acquainted.

"Tom, Hal," said Olivia with a puzzled expression. She always had a knack for remembering names.

Tom looked down at her, "President Grant has sent us to bring you to the White House to meet with him. He requests that you come now."

"Tom, please tell the President I will call Mrs. Handley to schedule a more convenient time," Olivia crossed her arms to punctuate her statement.

"Ms. Pope, we were instructed to bring you to the Oval Office as soon as you could get ready," Hal said.

Olivia took a full 60 minutes to get ready and another 30 minutes to prepare mentally and emotionally for this meeting. Her heart would not stop racing as she paced back and forth while drinking her coffee.

She now sat in the Oval across from Fitz ready to face whatever tide was coming.

"Mr. President, how can I help you?" Olivia said trying to sound as if she wasn't his Livy and he wasn't her Fitz. She sat on the sofa with her back ramrod straight to underscore a false formality.

Fitz leaned back on the sofa and really looked at Olivia conveying through his silence all the intimacy they had shared.

"Fitz, why am I here?" Olivia decided to drop the formalities eliciting a slight smile from Fitz.

"Why do you think you are here, Livy?" Fitz propped his feet on the coffee table and placed his hands behind his head and sighed as if he was preparing for a long talk.

"Why did Tom and Hal forcibly remove me from my home this morning? You sent them unannounced to collect me, leaving me no choice in the matter. I wanted to set up a meeting during a time that was more convenient for me."

"You are here, Livy, because they do what I say and I told Tom to bring you here. I need to know why you resigned 14 days ago? We need to resolve this …I can't…I won't…live without you in my life." Fitz dropped his feet off the coffee table and leaned in towards the other sofa where she sat across from him.

Olivia's eyes closed in an attempt to quell the tears that began to gather behind her eyes and to slow her breathing that was beginning to catch in her chest.

Tortured as she was Fitz rose and moved to the other couch, "Liv, sweetheart, don't cry.

Before Fitz could reach for her, Olivia rose and rushed over to the other side of the room by the regal drapes that adorned the window behind the desk.

"Don't you understand, I am not your sweetheart, Fitz. I can't do this anymore. I can't be your mistress. I love you and I should not ha-" Olivia's words were stopped when Fitz's lips devoured hers. Her tears ran freely now. She could not bring herself to resist his insistent lips and soon her lips her matching his. They kissed as if they were trying to make up for each day they had missed seeing each other. Fitz kissed the line of Olivia's tears while caressing her arms and back. The only sound was the breathing and the tick tock of the old antique clock on the mantle.

Puling back he looked deep into her eyes, "I love you. I need you. I want you every minute of every day. You are the love of my life and I need you to talk to me. We need to work this out. My morning schedule is clear and for the next 4 hours we need to work this out. Okay?"

"Okay, but what is the official reason for our meeting?" Olivia's eyebrows furrowed.

"I told Cyrus that you agreed to meet with me to strategize on my remaining appointments to the cabinet. Of course he wanted to be here too, but he is supposed to be vetting my other potential appointees."

"Looks like you covered all the bases," Olivia said with a sigh as she walked back to the couch.

Fitz grabbed her hand and pulled her back. "Livy, before we start talking can we just stand here for one minute away from the cameras and just be…a man and a woman who love each other.

"Yes, honey, one minute," Olivia smiled. Fitz smiled and they held hands and gazed into each other's eyes breathing each other's breath.

"Cyrus, a word please," Mellie smiled brightly at Cyrus as he passed her in the West Colonade on the way to the West Wing. She was feeling especially gleeful this morning due in part to her itinerary for today: meetings with the Social Secretary, her personal assistant and others on her team to plan for upcoming social events and to pick designers to craft her wardrobe for the winter and spring seasons. She had already set her platform: digital literacy. She knew it was a little unorthodox when adding the qualifier, "digital". This issue was the key to elevating her above other First Ladies. Digital literacy was all the rage in literacy circles and she would be the driving force behind making it national news in education and mainstream America. Her second reason for the extra bounce in her step was Fitz's shift in mood last night during dinner. He had been in a funk for almost 2 weeks and she could not pinpoint the cause. Olivia resigned around that time and she was beginning to think that her unceremonious departure was the precipitating event to his crappy disposition.

After the campaign stop in Georgia, when she had masterfully won over women with the faux miscarriage during the primary, the dynamic began to change between all three of them. Fitz was in a perpetual good mood, so much energy and giddiness. He was attentive to Mellie. They talked and laughed more. He even touched her more, but it was mostly in the presence of others and at press events. Olivia was a constant presence and so very indispensable to she and Fitz. Mellie consulted her about everything. Mellie considered her a trusted friend. Olivia was always helpful, but she never seemed to open up to her about anything personal. Mellie was grateful because Olivia's constant push for them to be more outwardly loving was working…actually improving their marriage.

Initially, for Mellie, this was the sign of a resuscitation of their dead marriage as Fitz characterized it during an argument. Fitz had once told her that she didn't love him, only the idea of him and what his father wanted him to become: Governor and then President. It was like a slap in the face especially when he chose to shout it at her during their engagement party 21 years ago. She had pulled him aside to discuss his dark mood then that had appeared out of nowhere. Did he have seconds thoughts? In his father's study, he had thrown that hurtful accusation at her. No matter what he thought or said then or all these years later she did love him and her whole life was in service to him and his calling to lead. Fitz's dad had interrupted them and sent Mellie back to entertain the guests. Thirty minutes later all was well and Fitz and his father returned to the party.

During the Presidential inauguration festivities, her mother had made a strange comment about Olivia. They were all gathered together and Olivia was briefing everyone on their itinerary for the week.

Mellie's mom whispered in her ear, "I can see what you mean Millicent, she is quite an asset to this administration. You better watch her though. She seems too indispensable to Fitzgerald for my liking. Listen to me dear, take those stars out of your eyes and observe her around Fitz. You'll see," Mellie's mom patted her hand and squeezed.

Mellie brushed aside those comments, but they replayed in her head the next time they were all together. She noticed their body language and how they always ended up on the same side of the room. Fitz was always tracking Olivia's movements around the room as she walked and talked. They held each other's gaze a bit too long. He was always looking at her backside. They smiled too much as if they shared some inside joke. One day Mellie casually mentioned the idea of fixing Olivia up with Keith Harrison from the State Department. Fitz frowned, but then smiled and said that he thought she was seeing someone outside the beltway. She knew that they were having an affair when Hal returned Fitz's flag pen to her describing it as Ms. Pope's gift to the President. It was the way he said gift and his reveal that they were huddled together over the Constitution at the National Archives.

All that mattered little now because Olivia was gone and Mellie had turned his mood around last night with her pep talk at dinner:

The clink clank of the silverware was the only sound that broke the silence. Fitz was pushing his steak and vegetables around the plate in between sips of water.

"Dear, what is the matter with you? You've been moping around for two weeks now. Do you feel okay? Is there a problem with your appointments and nominations? Is it Olivia?" Mellie whispered that last question.

Fitz's head jerked up at the sound of Olivia's name, "What do you mean?" Fitz took a long sip of water.

"Fitz, you tell me. Why aren't you sleeping or eating? Why are you up at the crack of dawn every morning running for God's sake? You hate running. You can tell me anything. I am and will be with you through anything. I will support you. We are a team. The people elected you to lead this great nation. Tell me what you need," Mellie pleaded earnestly.

Fitz took a few breaths. "Mellie, there has been chatter that the Democrats are going to block my nominations and criticize my further appointments no matter who they are…sight unseen. I am weary of the partisan rancor. My State of the Union address polled well but my colleagues on the other side of the aisle won't play ball." Fitz assuaged his guilt about this distortion by rationalizing that this was technically the truth even though it was far from the cause of his malaise.

"Fitz, you are the President. You are the leader of the free world. The American people elected you to lead. You are the key to America's prosperity and the well being of the world. Will there be obstacles and roadblocks? Yes, dear, yes. Again, I say, you are the President of these great United States and you are clothed in immense power!" Mellie gently caressed Fitz's cheek and dropped her voice and said, "Use it."

Fitz looked at Mellie, leaned forward, and gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek, "Thanks, Mellie. You've been reading Lincoln's writings." Mellie didn't answer. She flung her arms around him and squeezed tight as her eyes watered. She was overcome with emotion because she felt like it was just she and Fitz in the room. She was his wife, his confidant…his greatest asset. She felt complete and fulfilled.

Fitz hugged her back because he was genuinely thankful for this exchange. He was newly energized and knew what he needed to do. After dinner, he planned to meet with Tom and Hal to explain an errand he had for them bright and early in the morning.

Fitz and Mellie talked about Karen and Gerry over coffee and a slice of pie that had been shipped in from Georgia specially made for the President. Mellie couldn't remember the last time they had shared dessert and coffee…just the two of them.

Riding on the wave of such a great night with her husband, she had an urge to see him this morning. Like normal, he was up and out of the residence before she awoke.

Cyrus stopped in response to her summons in the hallway.

"Yes, Mrs. Grant. What can I do for you?"

"Well, I checked Fitz's schedule and he is in a strategy meeting for half of the day with a do not disturb order. Who is he meeting with and what are they strategizing about? Do you think you could get me in to see him during a break? I don't want to intrude if it is a really important meeting," said Mellie.

"I imagine he doesn't want to be disturbed, but he is in a meeting with Olivia Pope trying to work out the snags in these nominations and appointments. I would be with them but I am still vetting our must haves. I think he may be trying to convince her to rescind that resignation too. I sure hope he is successful so the band can be back together. Is there something I can help you with?" Cyrus explained. Mellie's face fell briefly, but she pasted on her winning smile, "No problem Cyrus. I wanted to see him, but it can wait. I, too, hope the band gets back together. As I always say if you have a problem, get Olivia Pope on it." Mellie smiled, touched Cyrus' shoulder and then walked off, head held high.

"Why did you leave me, Livy? Your resignation letter was little more than a Dear John letter. What happened to "I am in love with you" and "We're in this?" Fitz leaned back on his desk, legs and arms crossed, eyes laser focused on Olivia.

Olivia sat in one of the burgundy armchairs that faced the desk. Her expression fell at his words. Water glazed over her eyes and they became slightly red. Holding her head up and looking directly at him, she responded forcefully.

"Fitz, I am in love with you, but this is an impossible situation. We can't be together. You are married! The most we could have is an illicit affair like we've been having. I will not be your mistress and forever relegated to the margins unless this affair comes out and then I'll be the President's black whore. I deser-"

Fitz was walking around his desk as she spoke, but stopped when she said that. He rushed over and kneeled at her feet.

"Stop it Livy! This is the second time you have reduced us to a fucking racial epithet. I am sick and tired of you belittling us. I have never treated you like a mistress or our relationship like an illicit affair. I feel you and I know you don't mean it. I know it is an attempt to drive me away. Sweetheart, it won't work," Fitz drew her face close to his.

Olivia shook off his hands, "Excuse me Fitz. Please give me some space." She knew she couldn't think with him so close. That was why she had already kissed him once: The proximity factor. She began to pace back and forth across the room, reaching one side and then circling back to the other end. She wore a long, grey pencil skirt, a tailored matching jacket, and an off white blouse. Her 4-inch heels were black with a little bow on each side of the heel.

Fitz was mad as hell but completely turned on as usual when Olivia was around. The pacing didn't help because she really knew how to drive a skirt or a pair of pants.

"If this thing got out, you don't think that my race wouldn't be an undercurrent running through the skewering we both would receive? Your Republican colleagues would lead the mob. Recall the smears against John McCain that he had fathered a black love child, the Willie Horton ads, and I could go one. The problems with us don't stop there. We have an integrity problem! We wrote the State of the Union speech using phrases like, "will bring integrity back" and "our sacred obligation. We crafted these words and then slept together over and over again. How can you lead like this?" Olivia continued to pace back and forth.

"Livy, can you stop pacing and look at me? What is more sacred than love? I think that was why you didn't go in your room that night. You loved me and wanted to show me how much." Fitz sat down and put his head in his hands as she continued her back and forth journey.

"Mellie knows, Fitz. She knows about us." Olivia stopped behind the chair and looked at Fitz.

"I thought you said that Mellie had nothing to do with your departure," he reasoned.

"Fitz, she knows. How could you march her to my cabin door at Camp David? What if I would have opened the door scantily clad or in nothing at all?"

"As appealing as that would have been, we both know you wouldn't have done that, Olivia. How does bringing her to our cabin signify her knowledge of us? Our dinner that night was not that painful. Mellie talked about herself, monopolizing the conversation so much so that she couldn't see the ambiance you had set for us." Fitz walked over to the couch and plopped down and patted the sofa next to him,

"Why don't you have a seat so we can finish this, Livy."

Olivia continued her pacing, "She knows because we were reckless at the National Archives resulting in you losing your flag pin. Did you know that Hal found it?" When Olivia said, "flag pin", Fitz thought about that magical night:

They were huddled together looking at the Constitution. Olivia had pledged her love and they were basking in the glow of that revelation and the living history encased in the glass viewing case before them. They entwined their fingers as they gazed at each other. Fitz grabbed Olivia's hand and pulled her along beside him. He turned his head and crooked his neck around the corridors as if he was looking for something.

"Fitz, what are you looking for? Where are we going?" questioned Olivia.

"I want to touch it," Fitz whispered, his breath tickling her ear as he pulled her down the aisles and finally into a shadowy hallway a few corners down from the Constitution.

Olivia smiled and then chuckled, "The Declaration of Independence? The Bill of Rights? The Federalist Papers? " She looked into his eyes and beheld the raw desire on his face. Her smile disappeared.

"Fitz, stop, we can't do that here. This is the National Archives. The Secret Service is shadowing us. It would be totally inappropriate." Fitz smiled slyly at that and pushed Olivia against the railing.

The hallway was on an incline with rails on either side along the walls. He grabbed her face and placed his lips to hers taking his time with the exploration. To Olivia it seemed like an eternity of kissing as their tongues did sweet battle. She collapsed against the railing as he whispered, "I want to touch it," in her ear. She nodded her head in silent assent.

Relieving her of the coat, he nipped and kissed at her neck, behind and around her ear. His trail of kisses continued down her chest and stomach. She looked down and saw his tangled curls as he knelt before her. She felt his hands under her dress as they meandered over and inside her underwear, exploring what was covered. His hands and fingers followed a winding course until he slowly began to slide the under garment down her thighs. He pulled his head back and whispered, "I want to taste you, Livy."

When a moan escaped her lips, he lifted her skirt and his head disappeared under its folds. He continued slowly pulling the underwear down. When they were pooled at her feet, he said, "Lift your leg and hold on to the railing." When she raised her leg, he grabbed it and placed it over his shoulder.

When he kissed her there she couldn't contain the moan that escaped her lips. Olivia realized that she was holding her breath when he stood up and whispered in her ear, "Breathe, Livy, and turn around."

"Fitz," she sighed.

When she didn't move, perhaps because she could not, he turned her around so that her back was to him and she faced the wall. He nipped at her ear and caressed her breasts from behind.

"Hold on to the rail Liv and lift your leg on it." As she complied, he caressed her heat while relieving himself of his pants. When he entered her, he covered her mouth with his hand to muffle the moans.

"Fitz, somehow you lost the flag pin in that hallway," said Olivia interrupting his memory.

"Hal must have picked it up after we went to the bathroom to get cleaned up. The fact that we went to separate bathrooms didn't hide what we did in that hallway. I guess he knew it was a gift from me when he saw the video footage of me giving you the pin before the swearing in ceremony. He told Mellie," explained Olivia.

It began to make sense to Fitz then. "Did Mellie confront you about this? Is that how you got the pin?" Fitz questioned.

"Yes, she cornered me in the hallway. In no uncertain terms, she basically called me a whore, your whore, America's whore. In a twisted way, she was sort of giving me the okay to be your mistress. That was the last straw for me. I can't have her looking at me with that contempt in her eyes. If I stay, we would be playing a dangerous, reckless game." Olivia continued her pacing so caught up in her explanation that she didn't notice Fitz walking behind her. She reached the wall and then turned around and found him in front of her, their faces inches apart.

Placing a hand on either side of her, Fitz drew in closer. Olivia turned her head to the side, but he followed her movement.

"Livy, look at me. Mellie can't give you permission to be with me. I already belong to you and you belong to me. I am the President and I have given myself in service to my country. I would gladly hand over the reigns to Sally Langston if the woman I love, you Olivia, would have me. Don't lecture me about integrity and a sacred duty to my country. Where was that integrity and sacred duty when the votes were counted in Defiance, OH?"

Olivia's sharp intake of breath and widened eyes spoke volumes.

"Yes, I know what happened in Defiance."

Dear Penpals,

It's nostalgia time. "Going in Circles" was my very first Olitz fanfic.

"Once upon a time, not long ago, when people wore pajamas and lived life slow, when Olivia was stern and OPA justice stood (homage to Slick Rick's "Children's Story"), there lived a butterfly who fell in love with Scandal and Olitz. I took to the internet and Twitter to find like-minded individuals whom I could obsess with, but alas I found no chums to tweet with *sob, *sob". I didn't give up. I discovered fanfiction and the rest is butterflypages herstory, LOL. I wrote it out and some of you liked it!

While you probably haven't read this story, you may be familiar with its sequel, "Harvest." The above represents 5 chapters of 27. It's my most "Scandal-like" story, but it does take on my characteristic twistiness in later chapters which I'll re-post soon along with Harvest.