A/N: You is Cho Chang and she is Ginny Weasley. Also, I do not own Harry Potter, or anything related.
Your Calm Embrace
She was fire.
All chaos and tempest with burning passion and heated rage.
She scorched and ignited, leaving a trail of broken hearts in her warpath.
She was hatred. She was jealousy. She was anger.
She was love.
Not like you.
An ethereal goddess filled with loveliness and light.
You were grace and gentility, the calm before the storm.
You were sadness. You were sweetness. You were weakness.
You were forgotten.
--
It's the wrong place to be thinking of you. I try to stop myself, but I'm struggling to fight it. The feeling of longing is clawing at my insides and devouring my self control, I can't break free from its grasp; from your grasp. You have always had power over me. Not in the blindingly strong and fierce way in which she controls me, but in a more subtle and haunting way. You're haunting me.
It's strange to think that after all the deaths I've witness and the loved ones I've lost, you are the person haunting me. You certainly look ghostly now, dressed in pure white. Perhaps you are being ironic by dressing in that colour, today of all days. Or maybe you are tempting me, and your choice of attire is a poignant tribute to what could have been.
You are seated at the back of the chapel, utterly alone. Your ebony hair frames your anxious face and enhances your deep eyes; two dark pools that I am drowning in. As I catch your eye, all the forgotten memories begin to flood back, feelings filling me that I thought had faded with time. I thought that we were nothing; that our relationship was just a teenage love affair, but from the look in your eyes I know that it was something far more than that.
I attempt to distract myself from thoughts of you by surveying the excited faces of the congregation. They are all here, my friends, to support me on my wedding day. My best friend, Ron, stands to my right, his face fixed with anticipation. In the front pew are his family, Mrs and Mrs Weasley, Bill, Charlie, George, Percy and his wife, Hermione. I couldn't let them down, I couldn't abandon them. I've been abandoned so many times; I know the crushing pain that overwhelms. I couldn't do that to them. Yet I am a hypocrite, I abandoned you.
Even worse, what would she do if I left with you? My fiancée, she is my love, an overwhelming mixture of passion and strength. What would become of her? Would she ever forgive me? Would anyone ever forgive me? I try to push out of my mind one other question that lingers: will I forgive myself if I marry her and let you go?
The chapel doors fly open, light radiating throughout the entrance and illuminating the stone walls. The stained glass windows cast vivid colours across the congregation, yet somehow you manage to stay in the shadows. You don't want to be noticed, yet I cannot ignore you.
Then, she enters the chapel. She is also dressed in white, a floor length gown of sheer satin. Her wild fiery curls spill over her dress and her hazel eyes are brimming with vivacity. She clutches a bouquet and her smile does not falter as hundreds of eager eyes settle on her. She looks simply radiant; however I cannot help but think what you would look like, were you to take her place.
She eventually meets me at the front of the church, and the ceremony commences. All the while, thoughts of you cloud my mind and blur my vision. I am dragged back to reality when the vows begin, and my future hangs in the balance.
"Do you Harry James Potter take Ginevra Molly Weasley to be your lawful wedded wife?" The minister asks me. Suddenly, everything clicks into place and I realise what is happening and what I have to do. I understand that there is only one thing that I can say, even though it shatters my dreams and breaks my heart.
I love you Cho Chang.
"I do." I reply firmly, my stomach acid churning and my heart thundering relentlessly. I don't want to marry her, yet I know that I have no other option, no other choice. We cannot be together, that time has past and that love has to be forgotten.
"You may now kiss the bride." My wife gazes up at me spiritedly, her expression utterly joyous. She coils her arms around me and crushes her lips against mine. Out of the corner of my eyes, I catch sight of you silently leaving the church. Your beautiful face is tarnished with sorrow and loss of hope. I battle against the sinking feelings of regret, failing to focus on my wife. I am married to a beautiful woman with such intensity, passion and fire, yet I cannot stop the deep longing for you that I am feeling. I just want to be cradled in your calm embrace.