Written from Sirius in Azkaban, to Remus.
Dear Remus,
Azkaban is cold. So cold that when I simply murmur a word, a gust of freezing white air comes bursting from my mouth. The tops of my fingers have formed ice caps, much like when one places their finger in wax, however in this case, ice. Breathing has even become a struggle. The short ripples of air come into me like snow, burning my throat and chilling my insides.
I hear the prisoners beside me, howling and pleading to leave. They kick the walls in an attempt to let out their frustration. Judging by the noise, it does not help. The dementors have done their jobs with pride, and have succeeded in unravelling every drop of happiness my body stored and turning it into a poisonous anger which seeps through to my soul.
Do you remember the time we were at Peter's birthday party? The day was coming to an end and the sun hung perfectly in the sky, turning a calming pink colour as the sky darkened. After enjoying the day gambling and drinking endless mugs of butter beer, I sat peacefully on a bench which gave me a perfect view of the sunset. The weather was beginning to cool.
You walked up, and plonked down on the bench beside me, sighing heavily. "Good day, eh?" You smiled.
"Fantastic," I nodded. We were silent for minutes.
"Bloody hell," you shouted abruptly. "It's freezing!"
"Not really," I replied.
"Yes really," then you came closer in and put your arms around my shoulders. At first it was uncomfortable and awkward, and my face most definitely showed it. "It's to preserve body heat," you snapped.
"Sure." I laughed, secretly enjoying the intimate moment. I will remember it forever.
Remus, I just want to tell you, I really love you. I love you so much. My heart is dedicated to you and it always will be. When we first kissed, it was magical. It was nothing I'd ever felt with my previous lovers. That unexplainable tingling sensation I felt when your lips touched mine. The zealous chill which shoots down my spine as fast as lightning. It all only means one thing…love.
Now that you are gone, I don't know how I can live. Every day, I thought of us. It was the only thing that was keeping me alive in this prison. It has been a week since you died, however I was only informed yesterday. I am still in shock. I am grieving.
Please don't go, Remus! Please don't! You can't leave me! You can't! Just stay with me, Remus! I need you. I love you! They shoved me in Azkaban for a crime I didn't even commit! If they just believed the truth, you wouldn't be dead, and I wouldn't be imprisoned. I could have protected you from The Dark Lord! I could have saved you! I cannot go on.
My death will commence tomorrow. I will go to the heavens where I will be with you. We will be safe, together. I cannot stand living in this filth they call prison, where my only thing worth living for does not even live anymore.
Goodbye.
Sirius