Prologue

God. The all-powerful being. The Creator, the Big Cheese of the Known Universe - or whatever you want to call him - who is said to be in control of everything that happens. Or rather the one who is constantly questioned by those intelligent enough to ask why.

For those who believe, He is infallible. All encompassing in knowledge and completely free of fault; God is the only answer that is needed.

However, to those who refute any and all things religious, He is nothing more than a tool. Something to keep men from doing wrong, meant to inspire mankind to believe that there is something – a hidden meaning if you will – to the world as we see it.

And then to others – well let's just say they don't give a damn either way. So long as they have their free will, what does it matter, right?

But what about the Devil? When you die, is there an afterlife, or do we fade away into nothingness? Is it that simple? And what about the human 'soul'? Do people even actually have that energy, that glowing little ball of light that is so often seen in Hollywood's blockbusters?

...Let me say this right now: you bastards out there got it easy.

Nobody stops to think about the poor suckers that get stuck with all the fucking dirty work. Most of us don't even get a choice.

I sure as hell didn't.

In fact, it's probably safe to say that the majority of us supernatural grunts got the shit end of the stick when it comes to having any say in anything. No, we just get slapped upside the head with rules and responsibility and some condescending bullshit lecture on how it's all part of the Divine fucking Plan.

You might think I'm being overly dramatic. Too much 'whine, whine, bitch, bitch' to really know what I'm talking about.

You're dead wrong.

I know better than most what the hell is going on around here. I might be licking the bottom of last week's fraternity beer keg, but fuck all if I don't know the Truth. I could tell you that God's miracles are done on the second to last setting of an off balance washing machine, and the Devil's one exploitable weakness are those prissy little dark chocolate Bon Bons God sometimes brings in place of a sack lunch. I could tell you that at the end of the day, God finishes up his paperwork and sends it off to his superiors (yes, you heard me right the first time) to be approved, and I will tell you that what I'm saying is not the product of an over indulgence of brain melting substances.

That might have been the case before I got picked out from yesterday's leftovers. By comparison, before seemed damn good when put against the amount of suckage this brought to the table.

Well...for the first decade at least.

But that part doesn't come until way the fuck after the fact.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to drive through you're ignorant skulls is this; don't just think everything has to do with God. His Sparkly Righteousness isn't the only one busting his ass for the sake of the Universe.

So when you give a shit enough to think about it, ponder the meaning of life - yours or your daughter's, or the man tending the hot dog stand on the corner of W. 77th and Broadway's - try to take into consideration the whole picture, all the moving parts that keep everything from crashing and burning on the wayside.

Your local Death would – probably - appreciate it.

I know I would…