Disclaimer: It all belongs to Dick Wolf. C'est la vie.

Here's a slightly longer A/O oneshot. I'm on a roll today! I hope you like it.

Alex Cabot was drunk. Not falling down stairs, walking into walls drunk, but still, not entirely sober.

Alex Cabot was not a drinker. And when she did drink, she did stupid things. Like agree to go home with Olivia, who coincidentally – or maybe not so coincidentally – had also consumed several drinks. But she wasn't drunk.

Alex couldn't understand it. Olivia was much better than she was at holding her liquor. She could have four shots – or was it five? – and still be completely in control of any situation. Alex, on the other hand, started losing it around the second glass of wine, and she was completely inebriated by the third.

Alex was too drunk to protest when Olivia suggested they go back to her apartment and she was too drunk to protest when Olivia invited her inside. "You're too tipsy to go home by yourself," said Olivia disapprovingly, and in Alex's inebriated state, it didn't even occur to her that she could take a cab. It also didn't occur to her that Olivia might have just been looking for an excuse to get her in her front door.

"You're not drunk," complained Alex as Olivia settled them both down on the living room couch, slurring her words due to the amount of alcohol she'd consumed.

Olivia laughed. "Would it make you feel better if I was?"

Alex thought about it, then finally decided, "Yeah." Which was a testament to how intoxicated she was, because a sober Alex Cabot did not use words like yeah because they weren't real words and she knew that. "Why aren't you drunk?"

"I can get drunk if you want me to," she offered. "But then, you won't be the only one with a hangover tomorrow, and I bet I'm grumpier than you when I'm hung over."

"Don't think so," muttered Alex.

"You haven't seen me hung over," returned Olivia.

"We can have a contest," suggested Alex, her face lighting up as if this was the greatest idea in the world.

Olivia laughed. "I don't think so, honey."

Alex pouted. Even in her intoxicated state, she managed to ask, "What am I doing here?"

Olivia scratched her head. "I invited you in and you said okay."

Alex thought about it for a moment. She didn't really remember Olivia inviting her in or agreeing to it, but she was drunk and Olivia wasn't, so she was just going to have to trust the detective's version of events. "Why aren't you drunk?" she asked, forgetting that she'd asked the same question a moment before.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Didn't we previously establish that fact?"

Alex thought about it. "No."

Olivia stared at her. "Who are you and what have you done with the real Alex Cabot?"

"Mm," replied Alex ineloquently. "She left after the second shot of tequila."

"Oh. That explains it."

"Uh-huh."

Olivia sighed. "Okay, you know what? You're going to bed."

Alex was too drunk to protest as Olivia took her hand and started to lead her to the bedroom and lay her down on the bed. "Aren't you gonna stay with me? You know –" She raised her eyebrows. "– do something."

Olivia laughed. "Is that what you thought?"

Alex considered the question. "Uh-huh." She yawned.

Olivia smiled. "You're a bit too drunk to consent right now, Alex."

"Don't care," muttered Alex. Then she sat up. "Then how come –" Her brain was working much more slowly than usual, which still was just about the rate of your average New Yorker, but Alex wasn't used to it. "Ugh, why am I in your bed?"

Olivia thought about that. She actually wasn't sure why she'd brought Alex home, except that from the moment she'd set eyes on the ADA, she'd wanted to do that. And when she realized how drunk Alex was, she'd figured that she might as well seize her chance, because Alex was too drunk to refuse. Unfortunately, that also meant that Alex was a) too drunk to consent; b) too drunk to think straight; and c) too drunk to really communicate. Which pretty much ruined the night. "I don't know," admitted Olivia.

Alex flopped back down onto Olivia's pillow. "I'm gonna chuck this at you," she threatened.

Olivia chuckled. "I'm not worried. I'm pretty sure your aim isn't too great right now."

"Mm." Alex smiled slyly. "Sleep with me."

Olivia almost fell off the bed. She guessed that this was the alcohol talking, otherwise Alex wouldn't be so . . . forward. "I don't think so, honey."

Alex growled. Yes, she actually growled. "I wanna –"

Olivia laughed. "You're drunk, Alex."

"I know," said Alex proudly, as if to say, Isn't that great?

"That means no."

Alex glowered at her. "Don't you wanna?"

"Yes," admitted Olivia. "But I'm not going to take advantage of you."

"You wouldn't be," replied Alex, batting her eyelashes.

Well. It was taking all of Olivia's willpower to refuse Alex. She had the gorgeous blonde in her bed, and her morals were actually winning over the copious wetness between her legs, just at the sight of Alex.

Alex twirled a strand of hair around her finger and gave Olivia her most winsome smile. "We could have some fun tonight."

"Would you want to do that if you were sober?"

Alex thought about it. "Yeah."

Olivia was surprised at that answer, but then she figured it was a pointless question. "You're drunk, Alex," she repeated. "Sleep it off and then we'll talk."

Alex whined. "Fine. We don't have to do anything," she pleaded. "Just stay with me."

God, she was begging. And how could Olivia refuse? "Fine," she finally agreed. "But we are sleeping. We're not doing anything else. Got it?"

Alex flopped down on the bed. "God, I like you so much better when you're drunk."

Olivia smiled. "I like you so much better when you're sober."

Alex took it personally. She looked insulted. "Hey!"

"Don't get me wrong," said Olivia quickly, forcing herself not to reach out and touch Alex, even though she desperately wanted to. "You are very cute when you're drunk. Very cute. But slightly more . . . hazardous."

"You gotta get me a warning sign," slurred Alex. "For . . . uh . . . flammable. Yeah. Flammable. Or is it corrosive? No, poison. Yeah, uh, poison. Or all of them. Or . . . oh . . . never mind."

Olivia laughed. "Warning: too hot to touch."

"Yeah, that," agreed Alex, too drunk and too tired to realize what Olivia was saying.

As Olivia reluctantly lowered herself down beside Alex – even though she knew she really shouldn't – Alex rested her head on Olivia's stomach. Olivia knew she should push her away, but she couldn't bring herself to. "You're drunk," she said for the third time tonight, as if that negated everything she was feeling right now.

"We can pretend I'm not," said Alex, as if this was the most brilliant solution in the entire world.

"But you are."

"Objection," murmured Alex sleepily.

Olivia sat up, inadvertently pushing Alex halfway off the bed. "What did you say?"

Alex looked at her, confused. "I don't know."

Olivia sighed. "Okay, go to sleep. When you're hung over in the morning, then we can talk."

Alex snuggled toward Olivia. "Mm hm," she agreed, resting her head on Olivia's shoulder.

Olivia sighed again. She didn't have the heart . . . or the strength . . . or the willpower . . . or frankly, even the desire to push Alex away.

Soon, she could feel Alex's even breaths tickling her bare skin. She so badly wanted to kiss the ADA right now . . . but Alex was drunk. She wouldn't do that. She couldn't do that.

She watched Alex sleep for a moment. She knew how wrong this was, but it felt so good, and within minutes, she too was fast asleep.

Olivia woke up to find a blonde head nuzzling her cheek. She took a deep breath, then another. She was not going to give in. No way. No matter how wet she was, she wasn't going to do something she knew was wrong.

"Mm." Alex was still half-asleep, but God, she was mewling in arousal. She was really testing Olivia's willpower.

Olivia patted Alex's head. "Wake up, honey."

Alex's eyes flew open, but all Olivia could read in those baby blues was disappointment. "Liv . . ." she whimpered.

Olivia sighed. "No."

Alex stuck out her lower lip. "The alcohol has left my system."

"Not fully," agued Olivia.

"Good enough," whined Alex. "Please, Liv."

"No," repeated Olivia.

Alex sulked. "I'm not drunk anymore."

"Yes, you are!"

"Liv." Alex wasn't whining anymore. She was dead serious. "Shut up and kiss me."

It was a direct order, and Olivia couldn't help but obey. No one said no to Alex Cabot when she issued a command like that. And when Alex smiled into the kiss, Olivia wondered if that had been her whole plan after all.

Review if you enjoyed my oneshot!