Disclaimer: Well I thought it would be fun to be myself along with my clincally insane friend Angel! So I own one person out of this huge, big largest story of Carzy Talk. And that person that I own is ... ME! Jade, I own me. Well I do not own Tim, Curly, Angel ( she owns herslf), Dally, Two-Bit, Steve's "cat", Sponge-Bob, Squidward, or David Bowie or the song he sings in this or Elvis. How pathetic, huh? I thought so too! Well for my first story to post on my name of Take A Picture I'm very plzed. So if for some odd reason you seem to lose your sence of humor before you read this, then you completely lost the point of it! So if your in a bad mood and aren't in he mood for a starnge, completely un-natural laugh then we worn you NOW... DON"T READ THIS!!! But if your ready to be struck dumb and speachless then sit back and relax... IF YOU CAN!!! LoL J/K TAP & PMA
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Curly: Hi. I'm Curly. Have we met before? I have a belly button? How about you? Do you like to eat dryer lint? Tim does!
Tim: I DO NOT!
Curly: Tim likes to wax his legs with duct tape!
Tim: I DO NOT, CURLY! YOU'RE A DAMN LIAR!
Angel: No, I did that to Tim, Curly. Remember? You held him down when he tried to bite me after I ripped it off.
Curly: Angie, go away. I don't want you here.
Jade: You people disgust me. I don't want to hear about your kinky sex stories. Lay off.
Tim: They aren't sex stories, Jade. I was sleeping and they decided that they wanted to wax my legs. And NO I do NOT continue to wax my legs. The hair hasn't grown back on the spot yet. And that would be gay.
Jade: Well, maybe that suits you then, you stupid little fag.
Curly: You people leave! NOW!
Everyone (Jade, Angel, Tim, and Dallas): Okay, Curly. ::leave::
Curly: As I was saying.... What was I saying again? Oh well.... Oh yeah! Dryer lint! Have you ever looked at it? It's so....fluffy! And so....BEAUTIFUL!!!! I'm gonna marry dryer lint one day... ::sighs dreamily:: Either that or Steve, but don't tell him that! I like romance novels and long strolls on the beach. I don't like people to smell my belly button. It's kinda weird.
Steve's "cat": ::opens the door:: JUST LIKE YOU!!! ::leaves:: (Hint: there is no cat. Don't ask. Go bug Rockabye and have her tell you about it.)
Curly: I like for people to pour milk in my boxers and I can run around the neighborhood yelling "I AM MILK MAN! HEAR ME ROAR!!!"
::Everyone outside laughing their heads off::
Curly: Sometimes people throw books at me. I stopped to read some of them. They were kinda good. I don't understand big words like "poopy". Big words like that confuse me.
I don't like to be confused!
::Laughing in the background::
Curly: When it rains, I hide under the couch. The water fairies are gonna get me, you know. They've had it out for me ever since I stole their lucky charms. They're magically delicious, don't ya know?! No wait! It was the talking monkey that had the Lucky Charms!
I had fruit loops. The water fairies had Capn' Crunch! I used to be a water fairy! I had a pretty pink tu-tu and everything. That was before they sent me off to Happy Acres. They stole my tu-tu but gave me a purdy white jacket. I miss that jacket. They wouldn't let me keep it. I wanted to give it to Steve for a wedding present. ::sees Steve's "cat":: Here, KITTY! Oh, look dear! A little cat! ::stomps on the cat:: Uh! Uh! UH! Bad kitty! ::pets it lovingly:: I love you! You can be Panhandle McCat, and I'll be Curly Numbnuts, and we can be a superhero crime fighting team!
Steve's "cat: ::weak meow from squished cat::
Curly: And the shoe I used to STOMP YOU INTO OBLIVION WITH can be called Pangea!
And all of that jazz! Yeah, baby! ::does gay Elvis impression. (The part where he's thrusting his...well, you get the picture):: Tim is my brother. We do everything together! Even Angel!
Angel: ::From outside:: CURLY, YOU'RE A DAMN LIAR!!!
Curly: Ignore her. She's in denial. We used to take baths together. So did me and Two-Bit. But my mommy told me that was wrong. I ignore her, what does she know? NOTHING!! THAT'S WHAT! SHE KNOWS NOTHINGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tim has a belly button. It smells like peaches! He also keeps hand lotion on his dresser.
I don't know why..... Not that I've ever used it. ::looks away hurredily:: Spongebob is a fag. Have you seen those eyelashes? Where does he buy his mascera? I mean, come on!
Mine is so much better! Maybe I can give him eyeliner tips one day! Personally, I like Squidward. That nose.... ::sighs dreamily:: I wonder if I could convince Steve to get plastic surgery... ::scratches his chin thoughtfully::
::from outside::
Jade, slowly: You idiotic piece of dog crap...
Curly: Speaking of dog crap, That's what I had for lunch yesterday. A dog crap burger! It was soooooooooooooo yummy! ::licks his lips:: I didn't know that dog crap burgers had pieces of corn in it! You learn something new every day! Sometimes, I like to---::looks around in confusion:: Who am I? Who are you? Where am I? What am I?
::from outside::
Jade: YOU'RE AN IT-THING, YOU IDIOT!
Curly: I KNOW WHAT I AM! I'm Cousin Itt! ::snaps his fingers to the Addam's Family Theme Song::
::everyone comes back in::
Curly: ::points at Angel:: It's Wednesday! ::points at Jade:: It's Morticia! ::points at Tim:: It's Lurch! ::points to Dallas:: It's Thing! ::Screaming, running around in rapid circles, Steve's "cat" still stuck to the bottom of his shoe:: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!! IT'S THE HAND!!!! HE'S GONNA FLIP YOU THE DREADED BIRDIE OF DEATH!!!!! NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO! SHEILD YOUR EYES, CHILDREN!!! ::throws Angel out the window:: LOOK AWAY, LITTLE WEDNESDAY! ::whacks Dallas over the head with Steve's "cat":: DIE EVIL HAND OF SATAN!!!!!!! DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE! Wait a minute, this is the Addams' Family House...::resumes screaming::
Tim: ::rolls his eyes and throws Curly into the refridgerator, closing the door:: Thank God, he's shut up!
::muffled screaming from inside the fridge::
Angel: ::climbs back through the window slowly::
Jade: ::mocking sing-song voice:: Ha! You got slinged out the window!
Angel: Yeah, I noticed. ::picks a branch out of her hair::
Tim: DARN YOU BRICK!!
Angel and Jade: What brick?
Tim: THE BRICK FROM ABOVE!!!!!!!
Dally: ::lying knocked out on the floor::
Tim: THE LOVE BUGS SENT THE BRICK FROM ABOVE TO WATCH OVER ALL OF US AND SMACK US IN THE FACE WHEN WE FIND OUR TRUE LOVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jade and Angel: ::disbelief:: Sure they did, Tim. We'll take your word for it.
Tim: THEY ALSO SENT US....::looks around suspiciously:: ::whispers:: the plank...
Jade: The plank?
Tim: ::digs down his pants, extracting a piece of wood from his inside pocket:: THE HOLY PLANK! ::bows to the wood:: All hail the Mighty Plank!!!!
Jade: The mighty plank can kiss my butt! I don't feel like bowing down to that!
Tim: BOW TO THE PLANK!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::smacks Jade with the plank, sending her flying out the window::
Jade: ::gets hit in the face by the Brick From Above:: ::dazed:: Hey.....I found my true love....
::Steve's "cat" limps by::
Jade: I LOVE YOU, STEVE'S CAT!!!!!! ::hugs the decrepit cat as it scratches at her face in a desperate attempt to get away:: DON'T FIGHT ME, STEVE'S CAT!!!! YOU CAN'T FIGHT THE FEELINGS OF LOOOOOVE!!!!
Angel: Okay, these people around here are psycho....
::everyone gets quiet::
Curly: ::jumps out of the fridge:: NO CURTIANS!!!! NO PRIVACY!!!!! NO ALONE TIME!!! WE HAVE TO BE OUT IN THE OPEN!!!!
Tim and Angel: okay, we're leaving now. Curly is starting to get weird!
Curly: I'M ELVIS!!!! I'M THE KING!!!! ALL BOW DOWN TO MEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Angel: ::gets hit by the Chip Clip of insanity:: I'M DAVID BOWIE!!! ::singing off-key and very loud:: IT'S ONLY FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRR
Jade: ::shakes her head:: And I thought I was weird...Come on, Steve's "cat". Let's go someplace private!
::desperate meow::
Jade: ::walks away with the "cat", a Chip Clip of insanity on her butt::
THE END!!!
Moral: Never clip Chip Clips on your butt... AND! Never say you won't bow down to the Holy Plank! ::all bow down to the holy plank::
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Curly: Hi. I'm Curly. Have we met before? I have a belly button? How about you? Do you like to eat dryer lint? Tim does!
Tim: I DO NOT!
Curly: Tim likes to wax his legs with duct tape!
Tim: I DO NOT, CURLY! YOU'RE A DAMN LIAR!
Angel: No, I did that to Tim, Curly. Remember? You held him down when he tried to bite me after I ripped it off.
Curly: Angie, go away. I don't want you here.
Jade: You people disgust me. I don't want to hear about your kinky sex stories. Lay off.
Tim: They aren't sex stories, Jade. I was sleeping and they decided that they wanted to wax my legs. And NO I do NOT continue to wax my legs. The hair hasn't grown back on the spot yet. And that would be gay.
Jade: Well, maybe that suits you then, you stupid little fag.
Curly: You people leave! NOW!
Everyone (Jade, Angel, Tim, and Dallas): Okay, Curly. ::leave::
Curly: As I was saying.... What was I saying again? Oh well.... Oh yeah! Dryer lint! Have you ever looked at it? It's so....fluffy! And so....BEAUTIFUL!!!! I'm gonna marry dryer lint one day... ::sighs dreamily:: Either that or Steve, but don't tell him that! I like romance novels and long strolls on the beach. I don't like people to smell my belly button. It's kinda weird.
Steve's "cat": ::opens the door:: JUST LIKE YOU!!! ::leaves:: (Hint: there is no cat. Don't ask. Go bug Rockabye and have her tell you about it.)
Curly: I like for people to pour milk in my boxers and I can run around the neighborhood yelling "I AM MILK MAN! HEAR ME ROAR!!!"
::Everyone outside laughing their heads off::
Curly: Sometimes people throw books at me. I stopped to read some of them. They were kinda good. I don't understand big words like "poopy". Big words like that confuse me.
I don't like to be confused!
::Laughing in the background::
Curly: When it rains, I hide under the couch. The water fairies are gonna get me, you know. They've had it out for me ever since I stole their lucky charms. They're magically delicious, don't ya know?! No wait! It was the talking monkey that had the Lucky Charms!
I had fruit loops. The water fairies had Capn' Crunch! I used to be a water fairy! I had a pretty pink tu-tu and everything. That was before they sent me off to Happy Acres. They stole my tu-tu but gave me a purdy white jacket. I miss that jacket. They wouldn't let me keep it. I wanted to give it to Steve for a wedding present. ::sees Steve's "cat":: Here, KITTY! Oh, look dear! A little cat! ::stomps on the cat:: Uh! Uh! UH! Bad kitty! ::pets it lovingly:: I love you! You can be Panhandle McCat, and I'll be Curly Numbnuts, and we can be a superhero crime fighting team!
Steve's "cat: ::weak meow from squished cat::
Curly: And the shoe I used to STOMP YOU INTO OBLIVION WITH can be called Pangea!
And all of that jazz! Yeah, baby! ::does gay Elvis impression. (The part where he's thrusting his...well, you get the picture):: Tim is my brother. We do everything together! Even Angel!
Angel: ::From outside:: CURLY, YOU'RE A DAMN LIAR!!!
Curly: Ignore her. She's in denial. We used to take baths together. So did me and Two-Bit. But my mommy told me that was wrong. I ignore her, what does she know? NOTHING!! THAT'S WHAT! SHE KNOWS NOTHINGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tim has a belly button. It smells like peaches! He also keeps hand lotion on his dresser.
I don't know why..... Not that I've ever used it. ::looks away hurredily:: Spongebob is a fag. Have you seen those eyelashes? Where does he buy his mascera? I mean, come on!
Mine is so much better! Maybe I can give him eyeliner tips one day! Personally, I like Squidward. That nose.... ::sighs dreamily:: I wonder if I could convince Steve to get plastic surgery... ::scratches his chin thoughtfully::
::from outside::
Jade, slowly: You idiotic piece of dog crap...
Curly: Speaking of dog crap, That's what I had for lunch yesterday. A dog crap burger! It was soooooooooooooo yummy! ::licks his lips:: I didn't know that dog crap burgers had pieces of corn in it! You learn something new every day! Sometimes, I like to---::looks around in confusion:: Who am I? Who are you? Where am I? What am I?
::from outside::
Jade: YOU'RE AN IT-THING, YOU IDIOT!
Curly: I KNOW WHAT I AM! I'm Cousin Itt! ::snaps his fingers to the Addam's Family Theme Song::
::everyone comes back in::
Curly: ::points at Angel:: It's Wednesday! ::points at Jade:: It's Morticia! ::points at Tim:: It's Lurch! ::points to Dallas:: It's Thing! ::Screaming, running around in rapid circles, Steve's "cat" still stuck to the bottom of his shoe:: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!! IT'S THE HAND!!!! HE'S GONNA FLIP YOU THE DREADED BIRDIE OF DEATH!!!!! NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO! SHEILD YOUR EYES, CHILDREN!!! ::throws Angel out the window:: LOOK AWAY, LITTLE WEDNESDAY! ::whacks Dallas over the head with Steve's "cat":: DIE EVIL HAND OF SATAN!!!!!!! DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE! Wait a minute, this is the Addams' Family House...::resumes screaming::
Tim: ::rolls his eyes and throws Curly into the refridgerator, closing the door:: Thank God, he's shut up!
::muffled screaming from inside the fridge::
Angel: ::climbs back through the window slowly::
Jade: ::mocking sing-song voice:: Ha! You got slinged out the window!
Angel: Yeah, I noticed. ::picks a branch out of her hair::
Tim: DARN YOU BRICK!!
Angel and Jade: What brick?
Tim: THE BRICK FROM ABOVE!!!!!!!
Dally: ::lying knocked out on the floor::
Tim: THE LOVE BUGS SENT THE BRICK FROM ABOVE TO WATCH OVER ALL OF US AND SMACK US IN THE FACE WHEN WE FIND OUR TRUE LOVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jade and Angel: ::disbelief:: Sure they did, Tim. We'll take your word for it.
Tim: THEY ALSO SENT US....::looks around suspiciously:: ::whispers:: the plank...
Jade: The plank?
Tim: ::digs down his pants, extracting a piece of wood from his inside pocket:: THE HOLY PLANK! ::bows to the wood:: All hail the Mighty Plank!!!!
Jade: The mighty plank can kiss my butt! I don't feel like bowing down to that!
Tim: BOW TO THE PLANK!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::smacks Jade with the plank, sending her flying out the window::
Jade: ::gets hit in the face by the Brick From Above:: ::dazed:: Hey.....I found my true love....
::Steve's "cat" limps by::
Jade: I LOVE YOU, STEVE'S CAT!!!!!! ::hugs the decrepit cat as it scratches at her face in a desperate attempt to get away:: DON'T FIGHT ME, STEVE'S CAT!!!! YOU CAN'T FIGHT THE FEELINGS OF LOOOOOVE!!!!
Angel: Okay, these people around here are psycho....
::everyone gets quiet::
Curly: ::jumps out of the fridge:: NO CURTIANS!!!! NO PRIVACY!!!!! NO ALONE TIME!!! WE HAVE TO BE OUT IN THE OPEN!!!!
Tim and Angel: okay, we're leaving now. Curly is starting to get weird!
Curly: I'M ELVIS!!!! I'M THE KING!!!! ALL BOW DOWN TO MEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Angel: ::gets hit by the Chip Clip of insanity:: I'M DAVID BOWIE!!! ::singing off-key and very loud:: IT'S ONLY FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRR
Jade: ::shakes her head:: And I thought I was weird...Come on, Steve's "cat". Let's go someplace private!
::desperate meow::
Jade: ::walks away with the "cat", a Chip Clip of insanity on her butt::
THE END!!!
Moral: Never clip Chip Clips on your butt... AND! Never say you won't bow down to the Holy Plank! ::all bow down to the holy plank::