A/N 1: After I watched 6x16, I sat down to write and this came out. Sorry it's not any happier than the episode itself. I still hold out hope that John will come back next season. After all, he's not dead... But since this is the second time the writers broke up my ship on this show, I don't really trust them with Alicia's love life anymore.

The good news is that this will be a longer fic. The bad news is I have no idea where it's going. Although my last name isn't King, so it'll probably have a happy ending.

As always, please share your thoughts on this story!

"No matter how it falls apart

There's an art in breaking hearts

But there's no fair in farewell, no

And when I see you in the street

I pray to God you don't see

The silent hell in I wish you well

Oh, but as you walk away, you don't hear me say

Where's the good in goodbye?"

The Script, No Good in Goodbye

§§§

He'd never thought of himself as a coward. He didn't like the feeling.

John leaned on the wall of the elevator, his jaw tight. For a moment, when she'd smiled at him from across the room, he'd hoped… Then Peter had walked in and he'd known. Alicia Florrick could never be his. So he'd left, without saying goodbye. He wasn't into torturing himself for no good reason. If that made him a coward, then he would just have to live with that.

The elevator reached ground floor and he got out, his phone in hand to check his flight information. LA was waiting, his packed suitcases had been in the back of his car since early this morning. Soon, he wouldn't even think about her anymore, because he would be too busy. He ignored the bleakness of that thought. He'd get over it. It wasn't like his heart hadn't been broken before. He would just do what he always did and move on to a different city, start a different life.

This would be the job that would finally land him in the big league.

§§§

"What do you mean, he left?" Alicia's heart felt heavy when she saw the sympathy on Marissa's face.

The two of them were standing near the podium where Alicia would give her speech, apart from the crowd for now. Still, they made sure they kept their voices low. Alicia looked at Peter, claiming the spotlight in the middle of the crowd. Not for the first time in the past two days, the thought of divorcing him crossed her mind. She didn't want to be part of the package deal anymore.

"Did he say when he'd be back?" She knew it was a long shot, but maybe John had just stepped out to run an errand or something?

"I'm sorry, Alicia…" Marissa looked angry. "I don't think he'll be coming back. He told me… He told me to take care of you." The girl muttered something Alicia couldn't make out.

"I'm sorry, I didn't catch that last bit." Alicia struggled to keep her face neutral. Peter was looking at her, she could feel his eyes on her. She couldn't let her feelings show.

"I said, he's a coward," The contempt in Marissa's voice was barely veiled. "He should have had the guts to stay. Or at least tell you goodbye in person."

"Well, maybe this is for the best…" Alicia said. Peter was coming their way, followed by Eli, Josh and a throng of reporters. It must be time for her speech, she realized. "I'm not good at saying goodbye anyway."

"But…"

"There she is." Peters voice conveyed nothing but pride, but his eyes were a different story. They looked every bit as cold as she felt. "Honey, you ready to give your speech?"

"I sure am," Alicia beamed. Inwardly cringing, she took the arm he offered her and let him guide her towards the podium. Just a little longer, she promised herself. From the corner of her eyes, she saw Marissa shaking her head in confusion.

§§§

John watched a rerun of her speech on the small tv in the airport lounge while waiting for the boarding call to come over the speakers. She sounded strong and confident. He couldn't help feeling proud, but anger was seeping in as well. Especially when he saw her standing hand in hand with Peter on that podium, smiling at her husband the same way she'd been smiling at him only hours before. He realized that right now, she was probably moaning Peters name the same way she'd moaned his two nights ago.

She'd used him, he saw that so clearly now. Her thirst for power would always come first. And he'd been a fool to fall for her good girl persona.

Feeling angry was better than feeling sad, he decided when he heard the boarding call and made his way over to the gate. He would hold on to his anger.

§§§

Alicia checked her phone again the minute she came home. He hadn't called. She'd gone by his apartment after the party had ended, but he hadn't been there. His car was gone, too. She knew he was probably halfway to LA by now. And the more she thought about it, the more she agreed with Marissa.

He was a coward.

He could have at least done her the courtesy of a personal goodbye before running off to chase his political ambitions on the other side of the country. Especially after what they'd shared only two nights ago.

He was no different than Peter. His career in politics would always come first. And she'd been a fool to fall for his boyish charm.

Anger was better than sadness, she decided while she changed into her nightgown and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth. She would hold on to her anger.

A/N 2: It's very possible that the other fic, Conflicted Heart, will go on hiatus. I realize this will disappoint some people, and I'm sorry for that. I will finish it eventually, but I am struggling with it, and with John's personality in it. I need some time to figure things out.