A/N: Based on event's that happened between Syed and Amira returning from their honeymoon through to the reveal. This chapter is based on Syed's POV but future chapter's will also be based on Christian's POV as well.

This is one of my first fic's so please review so I know how I'm doing :p

For everyone on WFCTGIO xx

It had been three weeks since the wedding...three long weeks. Although, to Syed, it felt more like a lifetime.

As he and Amira stepped off the plane, he allowed himself a moment to reflect on their honeymoon. He knew it had had disaster written all over it. The moment Christian had said "it's okay, it's all okay"and gently kissed his forehead, he knew. He knew it was a lie, that he'd been condemned to a lifetime of misery and despair.

He inwardly laughed bitterly as he recalled their farce of a wedding night. Amira in her sexy lingerie, waiting expectantly for her husband to make love to her for the first time. The panic had consumed and overwhelmed Syed. All he had wanted was to be back in the safety and security of Christian's flat, to be wrapped up in those big arms, to be back in their perfect bubble.

He thought he could think of Christian. If he thought of all the time's they had made love together, maybe it would make doing the deed with Amira slightly more bearable.

Thoughts of Christian had flashed through his mind, but still he found himself unable to go through with it. The panic was too much. Amira had looking so stunning laying on the bed, waiting for Syed to pleasure her. But she just wasn't right. She wasn't a man. She wasn't him. She wasn't Christian.

Syed had rushed to the bathroom to be sick. It had felt like he was allergic to her. She was worried. She kept calling out to him, asking him if he was okay. He lied. He said it was food poisoning. He couldn't tell her the truth. He had to lie.

He had lied time and time again throughout their honeymoon. Every night Amira had put on her lingerie and waited. Waited for Syed to take her virginity. And everytime, Syed had lied. He had a headache. He was tired. He was ill. He wasn't in the mood. He had fast been running out of excuse's so it was a relief to him when the final day of their honeymoon had arrived.

Christian. Syed was suddenly woken up from his thoughts by that word. Christian. Amira was staring at him, her eyes sparkling.

"What did you just say?"Syed asked.

Amira rolled her eyes and playfully tapped him on the arm. Syed flinched, like he always did at the feel of her touch.

"I said that I can't wait to tell Christian all about our honeymoon!"

"Oh, I'm sure he won't be all that bothered..."

"Don't be so extra, of course he will - he's our Fronk!"

Syed's eyes flashed with anger. Christian hated that word. He hated being called Fronk. He found it degrading and insulting.

"Please don't call him that," Syed said wearily. "You know how much he hates it."

Amira wasn't listening. She never did. She had started wittering on about shoes and some other such nonsense. Syed closed his eyes and tried to block her voice out. He was tired. Tired of her and tired of this life. Already. He sighed to himself.

"Something wrong babe?" he heard Amira say as they stepped into the taxi that was waiting for them outside the airport. "It's okay, you know. I'm gonna miss it too."

Syed looked at her, confused.

Amira giggled. "The honeymoon!"

Syed looked at her blankly. She really had no idea, did she? No idea of the misery that was consuming every single part of his being. Sometimes he felt like screaming at her. Screaming that he was gay and in love with Christian. But he bottled it every time. His parents would never forgive him. He'd never forgive himself.

The journey back to Walford was a solemn affair. Neither Syed nor Amira spoke, not really knowing what to say to the other. For Amira, marriage had been a disappointment so far. She had imagined married life to be exactly how it was in her romance novels. She thought she and Syed would be all over each other, unable to keep their hands off. The reality was so different. She hoped it would change, get better in time. But as the taxi pulled into George Street, she had her doubts. Syed was so cold towards her, so distant. She reached out to hold his hand as they stepped out of the taxi but he quickly pulled away.

Syed felt guilty as he saw the hurt flash across her face. He tried to give her a reassuring smile but it seemed to turn into more of a grimace.

"Where are you going?"Syed called out as Amira disappeared into her old flat.

"Just going to check on a few things, I won't be a minute".

"Amira, what's the point, you don't live there now, we've got..."

Syed's voice trailed off. He'd very nearly said "our house".But he couldn't bring himself to say it. No matter how hard he tried, he just didn't see him and Amira as a couple. As an our, as a we, as an us.

He rolled his eyes. "I'll get these then shall I?"he said, referring to their bags. Amira didn't hear him.

Syed waited in the freezing cold for what seemed like an eternity. Amira eventually emerged, appearing to be enraged about something. As they walked round to Albert Square, Syed let her carry on complaining.

And then he saw him.

Christian.

Syed felt like he couldn't breathe, like his heart had stopped, he just needed to get out of there but it was like he was rooted to the spot, unable to leave.

"Christian!" Too late, Amira had seen him. As she embraced Christian in a hug, all Syed could do was stand and stare, the familiar sensation of butterflies forming in the pit of his stomach. Christian stared back, his piercing eyes baring into the very heart of Syed's soul...