All Cats… Bright & Colourful

"Oh, c'mon Tugger, make up your mind! What colour?"

The Rum Tum Tugger pondered for a moment, all the while staring at his friend Mr. Mistoffelees. The tuxedo cat sighed, irritably.

Tugger shook his large, lion-like mane, then said "Ok, how about, purple!"

"Oh, finally!"

Mistoffelees- a conjurer- took up a mystical pose, gave a flick of his paws, &, slowly but surely, Tugger turned purple! After only a few seconds, every last bit of Tugger- including his big, bushy mane- was purple. Tugger peered- half-nervously- into the full-length mirror next to him- & jumped back with a cry of "Great Heavyside!"

Then, after recovering his breath, Tugger slowly peered once again into the mirror, this time checking himself out.

"Wow," he murmured ", man, even when I'm purple I look cool, if not even cooler!"

"I totally agree," said a smooth female voice. Tugger & Misto jumped, & turned to see Bombalurina, a sexy, red queen smirking at them. Suddenly, Tugger's knees felt like jelly.

"Oh, umm, h-hi Bomba," he managed to stutter. He then realised that Misto was trying desperately to control his laughter. He gave the younger tom the evils, then turned, more confidently, to Bomba & said "So, babe, what d'ya think?"

Bomba giggled, then said "Oh, yes, honey, very fetching, absolutely marvellous!", before bursting out in fits of giggles! Tugger crossed his now-purple arms & said "Ok, your turn now! Misto, turn Bomba- GREEN!"

Suddenly Bombalurina stopped laughing. She started to say 'No', but it was too late! Within seconds, she was bright green! Looking into the mirror, she gave a shriek, then lunged at Tugger, who nimbly sidestepped causing her to almost crash into a pile of junk! She stopped just in time, & turned to go for Tugger again, but he & Misto were nowhere to be seen!

'Oh, damn it, boys!' she thought, miserably. She was thinking about what the other Jellicles would say, when she heard a snigger not far away. Taking a few steps forward, she saw Tugger & Misto peering cautiously round from a pile of junk. She tried to give them the evils, but Tugger looked so funny that she just had to laugh. When the toms realised that she was no longer thinking of killing them, they ventured out, & joined in laughing. Soon, all three of them were rolling around, laughing fit to burst! After a few moments, Tugger sat up, & said "Hey, I've got an idea. Misto, I bet you couldn't turn every single cat in the Junkyard a different colour!"

Bomba laughed even harder, & Misto said "You're on! But you two have got to decide the colours, Ok?"

Bomba & Tugger nodded, & Tugger said "Ok, let's do Munkustrap first! I think he's out there!"

The purple tom peeked out into the main part of the Junkyard, saw his brother- a serious-looking silver tabby-, stifled a laugh & gave the all-clear. Misto nodded, & said "Ok, Bomba, what colour?"

"Hmm, how about- HOT PINK!"

Misto & Tugger burst out laughing, then the conjurer moved so that he could see the silver tabby. A second later, Munkustrap was hot pink. The three cats gave themselves up to pure hysterics for about five minutes, then Misto sat up, wiped his eyes, & said "Right, who's next?"

About 20 minutes later, the three cats had a pretty satisfying result. As well as Munkus, Alonzo, a black & white tomcat, was blood red & vomit-coloured, Skimbleshanks, a red tabby, was black-&-white checkered, his mate, Jennyanydots, a brown tabby, was electric blue, Asparagus, another brown tabby (sort of) was silver (literally!) & Jellylorum, a pale brown tabby, was multi-coloured.

Also, Victoria, a pure white kitten, was now jet black with brown patches, Etcetera, a pale tabby, was brick red, Electra, a red & black kit, was blue & green polka-dot & Pouncival, a black tabby, was now silver, with gold stripes! Misto had also, just for the fun of it, turned himself snot yellow & white! At that moment, Bustopher Jones, a larger-than-life tuxedo cat, entered the Junkyard. When he saw the colourful, sleeping Jellicles, his mouth dropped open. Deciding not to waken the colourful cats, he turned around & walked out of the Junkyard, swinging an electric blue tail, attached to a hot pink body! The three culprits silently watched him leave, then collapsed to the floor in hysterics! Then, Misto looked up, & said, slowly "Old Deuteronomy?"

The three cats looked at each other & sniggered, but then they heard Old D say "Sweet Heavyside!" Quickly, Misto waved his paws, & the Jellicle Leader turned…

… STRIPY! Bright orange stripes ran across his normal coloured fur, & one even went across his eyes, like a mask! Unfortunately for the three culprits, Old D just HAPPENED to walk past a puddle! Tugger & Bomba heard Misto gasp "CRAP!" before quickly ducking back…

…a fraction of a second too late, for Deuteronomy had seen (& heard) him! The Leader woke Munkustrap, calmly (?) explained the situation to him & went over to where Tugger, Misto & Bomba were trembling with fear, while Munk went to wake the other Jellicles! The Jellicle Leader peered round the pile of junk…

…& stifled a laugh! This is what he saw- a snot yellow cat, resembling Mistoffelees, cowering next to a bright green queen who Old D believed to be Bombalurina, who, in turn, was cowering behind a very, very purple Rum Tum Tugger, who was also cowering in fear! For a moment, all was silent. Then, the Junkyard exploded in angry voices! But before Misto could think of putting everyone right, Cassandra, an elegant half-Siamese, strutted into the Junkyard, & Misto couldn't resist the temptation to turn her into…

…a Chinese Crested dog! The queen felt a tingling feeling, looked down, & screamed in shock! Then, she caught sight of Misto, screamed Bloody Murder, & charged! Misto cried out in shock, & ran! He didn't get very far! Cassandra dived at him, pulling them both to the ground. She then pinned him down, & slashed at him with her dog's claws! The tux kitten struggled, & Tugger leapt forward, but not before the pissed off queen- er, BITCH,- had done her best to sink her dog's claws into Misto's face! The poor kit cried out in pain, & at that moment, Tugger crashed into Cassandra, sending her flying backwards, ironically into her mate, Alonzo.

Tugger pulled Misto up, & pushed the yellow cat behind him, spreading his arms out as he did so. Alonzo helped Cassie up. The 'dog' shook herself, then took a step towards Misto & Tugger, growling. But the purple cat hissed, & 'puffed' himself up as much as he could. Cassie yelled at Misto "Change me back, NOW, you miserable little worm, or you'll regret it!"

Tugger gave her a look, then said, rather icily "Man, calm down, Cass, honestly, can't you take a joke?"

Cassandra nearly exploded. "Calm down! CALM DOWN!" She yelled so loud, everyone within a few feet of her jumped back in alarm. Ignoring this, she carried on "I'VE BEEN CHANGED INTO A DOG, & YOU ARE TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN! NO! I'M WARNING YOU, CONJURER, IF YOU DON'T TURN ME BACK THIS INSTANT, I'LL…" but even as she spoke, Misto had waved his paws & she was a queen again. She stopped, abruptly, to look down, & sigh with relief. But Rum Tum Tugger stayed in front of his friend, in case the queen should go for him again. Cassie shook her head, then hissed at Misto & Tugger, before storming out of the Junkyard. Alonzo gave Misto a look, &, once the kit had also turned him back, Alonzo ran after his mate.

With great haste, Misto changed himself back to his usual colour. But he left Tugger, Bomba & everyone else the same colours. Electra & Etcetera clearly thought the whole was incredibly funny. However, not one other cat agreed with them. Jellylorum & Jenny in particular were NOT happy. Swiftly, Jelly moved towards Misto, menacingly, but she looked so funny that, although he managed to hold in his laughter, he didn't change her back. She was furious! With a hiss, she 'leapt' (well, if O.A.P cats CAN leap!)forward, shoved Tugger aside with surprising strength, caught Misto by the arm & snapped at him "Right Mr. Mistoffelees, the joke's over! If you're so smart, then you can just turn everyone back, RIGHT NOW, & your punishment can be sorted out! Got it?"

Misto trembled, & shamefully nodded his head, but Tugger moved forward & broke Jelly's grip on the kitten's arm. Then, to everyone's amazement, he said, icily "Geez, chill out, Wobbly Jelly!"

Even Jelly seemed amazed. No-one EVER dared disagree with her, let alone INSULT her. The other cats trembled, as Jellylorum fumed. But Tugger just continued calmly. "Honestly," he said, in his coolest voice "you guys all need to chill! We were just having a laugh!"

The still-hot-pink Munkustrap hid a smile behind his paw (honestly, his brother was such an ARSEHOLE!) & the kittens giggled as Tugger continued his now-it's-your-turn lecture (aimed, obviously, at Jelly!), by saying "I mean, really, it's not as though we're stuck like this forever! Right, Misto?"

The kitten nodded, & said "Of course not! I wouldn't have done it otherwise!"

Tugger nodded. "Obviously! & besides, before you all go biting poor Misto's head off, it was MY idea in the first place! & it was my idea to change you all different colours! Well, it was Misto's idea to target Cassie, & that was quite funny, but apart from that, the blame's on me. So there!"

There was silence, then Pouncival yelled "Kill Tugger!"

Several cats made as if to dash forward, but Munkustrap & Deuteronomy stepped in to protect him. All the cats started talking at once, & Deuteronomy had to hold up his paws for silence. Once everyone was listening to him (&, for most, trying not to laugh at his new 'style'!), the Jellicle Leader said "Ok, everyone, I know this has been a bit of a, erm, shock," Jelly snorted, sarcastically ", but I'm sure Mistoffelees would be only too happy to change us all back, & life can go back to normal…"

"Oh, yes, & you trust him not to change us all back again once we aren't looking?" Jellylorum enquired, coldly. Deuteronomy gave her a look, then turned to Misto. The tuxedo kitten sighed, then gave a quick flick of his paws. Within seconds, all the cats were their own colours again- well, sort of! Unfortunately, Jennyanydots spotted that her friend's colours had not been entirely restored, for Jelly was still swinging a multi-coloured tail! The now-brown-&-black Tugger also noticed it, & sniggered. But, this was just too much for Jelly! She saw her tail, & yelled "See, what did I say! I'm sorry, but I insist that Mistoffelees is punished!"

To Misto & Tugger's dismay, Deuteronomy nodded, & said "Yes, alright, Jellylorum. But, if Mistoffelees is to be punished, I believe Tugger, who's idea it was in the first place, should also share the punishment!"

Tugger gulped, & Misto trembled. Deuteronomy said to Jelly "Would you consider solitary confinement a suitable punishment? After all, no physical harm came to anyone…"

At this, Tugger spoke. "Erm, excuse me, but I believe Misto got his face scratched by Cassandra!"

"I think, Rum Tum Tugger, your father was referring to us!"

To Jelly's shock, Tugger actually HISSED at her! But, before a fight could break out, Munk stepped in to intervene. Tugger stepped back, slightly calmed. But Jelly wouldn't give up that easily.

"You want to watch what you say, Rum Tum Tugger! One of these days, that big head of yours is going to get the better of you. You're in-sufferable enough as it is, & one of these days, you're going to wind up all alone, with no-one who cares!"

At this, there were numerous outcries from most of the other cats, & Old Deuteronomy frowned. But Tugger just said, smoothly "Yeah, well, if that does happen, at least you won't still be around to gloat. Oh, & by the way, if I'm insufferable, you are insufferable & pathetic!"

Deuteronomy decided this was enough. As all the cats started talking at once, again, he yelled "Quiet!"

At once, everyone was silent. Jelly was practically shaking with rage, & Tugger was silently surprised that steam wasn't emitting from her nostrils. Once everyone had turned, almost silently save for a few kitten's whispers, to Deuteronomy, he spoke again. "Jellylorum spoke correctly. I was actually referring to all but you three," he nodded at Tugger, Misto & Bomba ", anyway, this may have only been a mild prank, but, had any humans come along, Heavyside only knows what might've become of us all- what might've become of you Misto!"

The tux cat hung his head, & Deuteronomy continued. "Therefore, Rum Tum Tugger & Mistoffelees, you will both have 9 days isolation, obviously in separate places. Tugger, you will be in the car-boot, & Munk will guard you. Misto, you will be in one of the west interior chambers, &, Alonzo will be your guard, but only at nights, as the chamber door will be locked. Jellylorum, you will sort Misto out with food, Jenny you will see to Tugger! & no arguments!"

The two adult queens pouted, & Tugger & Misto sighed, before they were led to their 'prisons'. The kittens whimpered- Etcetera & Electra for Tugger, & Victoria for Misto- but there was nothing more to be said. It was going to be a long 9 days. But I can tell you one thing. Misto never changed anyone (unwilling!)into anything else ever again! & Tugger & Jelly never once thought of crossing each other any more!

The End