The Suite Life of Zack and Cody – Love at First Bite
Halloween special where Zack and Cody fall for some drop-dead gorgeous girls. Maddie finds out their secret and tries to snap the boys out of their love-struck trance.
[We open at school, where Zack and Cody are at their lockers.]
CODY: Who are you going to invite to the Halloween Dance?
ZACK: Everyone.
CODY: Even the guys? [Hold for laughter]
ZACK: Ew, no! Are you crazy?
CODY: No. Mom had me tested. [Shuts locker door] Well, can't be late for History!
ZACK: Are you going to learn about your love life? [Hold for laughter]
CODY: Very funny, Zack. [Clearly not amused. He turns around, bumping into two very pretty girls.] Sorry! [He picks up the scattered books and papers]
CLAUDIA: You wouldn't happen to know where the History room is, would you? [Bats eyelashes]
CODY: Uh... I'm actually going there right now! I'm Cody, and this is my brother, Zack.
CLAUDIA: Great! I'm Claudia Marchette. We just moved here.
ZACK: And what's your name? [Puts arm around Seraphina]
SERA: Seraphina, but my friends call me Sera. You're twins? So are we!
CLAUDIA: Well, fraternal twins. I'm the smart one.
SERA: I'm pretty one. [Smiles]
CLAUDIA: You're also childish.
SERA: Anyway... I'm on my way to Chem Lab.
ZACK: What a coincidence! Me too. Wanna go to the Halloween Dance? [Lines are all kind of run together]
SERA: I'd love to. [Waves to Claudia] Later, sis!
CLAUDIA: See ya, sis! So Cody...who are you taking to the dance?
CODY: Uh... No one. Not yet. I mean I haven't- Unless you-
CLAUDIA: I would be honored.
[It's Friday and we open up in the Tipton lobby where London is talking animatedly to Maddie at the candy counter]
LONDON: Now, let me tell you, that was scary!
MADDIE: What? Pimples? Warts?
LONDON: Worse. Discoloration! [Hold for laughter] It's a sign of aging!
MADDIE: London, to me, that's hardly a- Oh, hey, Zack! Hey, Cody! Who are your friends?
CODY: Claudia and Seraphina Marchette.
MADDIE: Pleased to meet you. I'm Maddie, and this is London.
SERA: London...Tipton?
CLAUDIA: THE London Tipton? Heiress to the hotel?
LONDON: [Sing-song] That's meeeeee!
SERA: Wow!
CLAUDIA: What were you talking about when we walked up? Something about aging?
LONDON: [Dramatic but trying to be secret] The scariest thing of all. Paris...without makeup! [Hold for laughter]
MADDIE: [Eyeing Sera] So Zack, are you finally over me?
ZACK: [Pretending to be macho and putting his arms around his new girl] Yeah, I've moved on to bigger and better things, babe. No hard feelings. [Hold for laughter]
MADDIE: [All sarcasm] I don't know how I'll ever get over this.
[Sera smiles, exposing fangs in her triumph. Maddie sees this and gasps. Sera is caught. She changes the subject so no one has time to notice or think too much about it.]
SERA: Zack, we should get going. Claudia and I need to get ready for the dance tonight.
CLAUDIA: Awww. But I wanted to-
SERA: Don't we need to raise the hem on your dress or something? ["Abort mission" eye motion]
CLAUDIA: Oh...right. See you at the dance, Cody. [Kisses him on the cheek]
SERA: Later, Zack. [Blows him a kiss, which he catches fondly. The girls leave out the main doors]
ZACK: [Dreamily] Bye...
CODY: Ok, Lover Boy, we need to get you cleaned up. [Drags him by the ear to the elevator]
MADDIE: Oh my gosh!
LONDON: What?
MADDIE: That Seraphina girl is a vampire!
LONDON: What are you talking about? There's no such thing as vampires.
MADDIE: That's what I thought. Until I saw her fangs!
LONDON: Maybe she put her Halloween costume on early.
MADDIE: Did anything else about her scream "blood sucking monster" to you?
LONDON: No, not really...
MADDIE: She's a vampire, and I'll prove it to you!
LONDON: I still say she's not as scary as Paris. [Hold for laughter]
MADDIE: Oh, forget it! [Storms off]
[We have a quick shot just outside the Tipton Hotel where the girls just exited the last scene, entering this one.]
SERA: She knows.
CLAUDIA: What? Who?
SERA: Maddie. She knows I'm a vampire. She saw my fangs!
CLAUDIA: Not again! Sera, you can't keep doing this. We don't want to move again, do we?
SERA: No...
CLAUDIA: Then try to keep a low profile.
[We open up at the dance party. A bunch of kids in costumes are dancing. Sera, dressed as a Victorian vampire, sidles up next to Zack, who is half heartedly dressed as a werewolf. Shoes, jeans, flannel shirt; some hasty stage makeup for his face; with fake tufts of fur on the hands, his ears and his open chest. His four-set fangs are cheap and plastic, but Seraphina the vampire looks very real. Claudia comes in behind her, also dressed as a vampire, but a cloaked, classic, simple looking vampire.]
SERA: Hey, Zack.
ZACK: Hey! Lookin' good [Checks her out]
CLAUDIA: Where's Cody?
CODY: [From off] Right here! [Enters, dressed as Albert Einstein in a white lab coat and crazy grey wig] Claudia, I love your costume!
CLAUDIA: [Modest] Oh, this old thing? I just had it lying around... I like yours, too. [The camera follows Claudia and Cody to the punch bar] I really like it here in Boston.
CODY: It's ok. It gets a little loud sometimes, but living with Zack, I'm used to it.
CLAUDIA: You two have a good relationship?
CODY: Well... I wanna say no, but I think deep down, we love each other.
CLAUDIA: [Laughs] Same. Sometimes Sera can be such a pain. I really hope she doesn't make us move again.
CODY: Why would you have to move because of her?
CLAUDIA: [She's said too much] Oh, she just gets a little...out of control.
CODY: She hasn't killed anyone, has she?
CLAUDIA: Oh, no! Never! Not my little sister.
CODY: I thought you were twins?
CLAUDIA: We are. I'm older by two minutes. [Big smile]
CODY: Lucky you. Zack was born ten minutes before me. He's always holding it over my head.
CLAUDIA: I do that to my sissy all the time! Gee, looks like her and Zack are really connecting. [Pans over to where Zack and Seraphina are hugging, her back to Cody and Claudia.]
MADDIE: [Enters the dance dressed as a spy] Zack! Where are you? [Spots them hugging from the opposite side of Cody and Claudia. From this angle, she can see Sera opening her mouth, about to plunge her fangs into Zack's neck.] Zack, no!
ZACK: [Turns around before he can be bit] Maddie? What are you doing here?
MADDIE: She's a vampire and she was just about to have you for dinner!
SERA: [Glaring at Maddie] I think you should go.
ZACK: Nice joke, Maddie.
MADDIE: It's not a joke!
ZACK: I understand you're jealous. It's ok. It happens to everyone after a break up.
MADDIE: Ugh. Look at her. She has fangs!
ZACK: [Looks to Sera, who smiles, her teeth appearing normal] I see a beautiful girl in the most amazing costume I've ever seen.
MADDIE: [Sera smirks at Maddie, knowing Zack's on her side] That's because those fangs are real!
SERA: Does my sister look like a vampire?
MADDIE: Who?
SERA: Claudia. She's over there with Cody. [Points her thumb over her shoulder] If you call me a vampire, you're calling her one. She doesn't like it when people do that kind of thing.
MADDIE: All I'm doing is telling the truth.
CLAUDIA: [Comes over with Cody] What's going on? What are you doing here, Maddie?
SERA: The human is calling us vamps.
MADDIE: Human?
CLAUDIA: Well, we are dressed like vampires.
SERA: I meant full-time, dumb-bell. And you call yourself the smart one.
MADDIE: I saw her about to bite Zack!
CLAUDIA: Sera!
SERA: [To Claudia] I'm suffering from BDD.
ZACK, CODY, and MADDIE: Huh?
CLAUDIA: [Being the smart one] Blood Deprivation Disorder.
SERA: Claudia!
CLAUDIA: What?
CODY: [Wary] So you are vampires?
MADDIE: Isn't it obvious?
SERA: Fine. I admit it. We're vampires.
CLAUDIA: Don't bring me into this!
SERA: You're the one who explained what BDD was.
CLAUDIA: Fair enough.
ZACK: Cool!
CLAUDIA and SERA: [Looking at him funny] Cool?
ZACK: Yeah! But as a friend, I get a bite-free guarantee, right?
SERA: Yeah, sorry about that. BDD has its effects of vamps. I promise it won't happen again.
ZACK: Phew! Ok. Good. Cuz you being a vampire is actually really hot.
CODY: But wait! Vampires are mathematically impossible.
CLAUDIA: [Offended] Excuse me?
CODY: Well, if everyone you bite turns into a vampire, the food source would be cut off eventually.
CLAUDIA: It's called unaffected animals. Dogs, cows. We bite, nothing happens to them. Just a little blood loss, that's all.
CODY: What about the sun? We've seen you at school.
SERA: Ever heard of sunscreen? Besides, most of your little superstitions are made up. Like, really, what wouldn't die from a silver bullet or a stake to the heart?
CODY: Fair point.
SERA: Are we all cool then?
CODY: We're cool.
ZACK: And you're hot! [Hugs Sera, then Claudia and Cody join in.]
MADDIE: [Left alone] Hello? I'm still here! [No one breaks the hug] This doesn't change the fact that they're vampires. [She continues to be ignored] Oh, whatever! [Storms off. Roll credits.]