Lily Evens feels like she's invisible. She is entering her fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, but nobody really knows her. Only two people know her name Hagrid and Remus. Maybe only Hagrid, she doesn't know if Remus only pretends or not. There is however one boy she wishes knows her name. His name is James Potter. They have had several conversations before, but what always broke her heart is that he never seems to remember him or her. As she was thinking this the door of her compartment opened and in walked James. They had a short conversation before he saw one of his friends, "Oh hey that's Sirius I'd better go," he said standing up. "Ok, bye" She tried to remain calm, but was jumping for joy on the inside. He had remembered her!!! His next words broke her heart. "Well it was nice to meet you just tell me if you need help to find your way around the school it gets pretty intimidating when you new. By the way what's your name?"
"Do you dream that the world will know your name "
"So tell me your name"
She swallowed the shattered pieces of her heart and said in a voice she hoped sounded natural, "Lily, my names Lily." "Wow Lily is a very nice name." (He said that the last time to) "Well Lily I've got to go see you around." No you won't she thought bitterly like you'll even remember. "You know what," she said aloud after he left, "I don't even care anymore."
"Do you care about all the little things or anything at all"
Who am I kidding she thought grimly as she grabbed a lit candle off the wall.
"I wanna feel all the chemicals inside I wanna feel."
She made sure her sleeves were rolled up all the way before bringing her wrists down to the flame first the right then the left. She winced each time the flame singed her skin.
"I wanna sun burn; just to know that I'm alive"
"To know I'm alive"
She changed into her robes, then looked at the time. She still had a while until they got to school, so she cried herself to sleep.
"Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know"
"If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go"
"Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon"
"Where everyone you know, never leaves to soon"
That night after dinner and a brief talk with Hagrid she went to sleep. She woke up the next day on the second of September or her birthday.
"Do you believe in the day you were born"
She looked around hoping to see an owl with a card or letter, and just as she expected there was nothing.
"Tell me do you believe"
She got up, got dressed and checked her face in the mirror to make sure nothing of her disappointment showed on her face. Not like anyone would notice she thought grimly.
"Do you know that everyday's the first of the rest of your life"
So, with that thought in mind she went down to breakfast.
"Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know"
"If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go"
"Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon"
"Where everyone you know, never leaves to soon"
"That's it," she said aloud because nobody ever listened to Lily Evens, "I'm going to do it, I'll go from the astronomy tower tonight." Little did she know that for the first time in a long time someone was listing to Lily Evens.
"This is to one last day in the shadows"
As she went through the day she slowly detached herself from her life. After dinner she made her way up to the astronomy tower.
"And to know a brothers love"
"This is to the New York City angels"
When she got up there she transfigured a leaf into a pen knife and found the burns on her wrist from the day before. She slowly started to make the cuts.
"And to the rivers of our blood"
"This is to all of us"
When she made it to the center of the tower she stopped and took in her surroundings.
"Don't tell me if I'm dying, cause I don't wanna know"
"If I can't see the sun, maybe I should go"
"Don't wake me cause I'm dreaming, of angels on the moon"
"Where everyone you know, never leaves to soon"
As she started edging towards the ledge she took one last look up at the stars."
"You can tell me all your thoughts about the stars that fill polluted skies"
As she climbed onto the ledge she took her final look around. It was her place. She always came up there when life became too hard to live.
"And show me where you run to when no one's left to take your side"
She looked around and thought I'm tired of living in the shadows it's time for me to see the sun. Then she jumped.
"But don't tell me where the road ends cause I just don't wanna know, no I don't wanna know.
She felt the ground beneath her and knew that life was slowly seeping out of her. All of a sudden she felt very tiered. In the distance she thought she heard James' voice yelling, "Lily oh god no please Lily, Lily" Then the world went black as she slipped into the endless obis of darkness.
"Don't tell me if I'm dying"
"Don't tell me if I'm dying"
"Don't tell me if I'm dying"
I have never had a single suicidel thought in my life thank you very much CoughMeganCoughCough
Tell me if you loved it or hated it should I continue it