Disclaimer: I do not own Zorro, nor do I make any money from writing this story. Dialogue and situations used from the episode are property of ZPI, the rest of the story is my property and cannot be printed or used without my permission.
Author's Note: Set about a year after Affair to Remember. Sorry for more angst…maybe I'll get to be in a funny mood again once I get these stories finished. I do have at least one funny one started. And how long are chapters supposed to be? tell me if you don't like it. Or if you do.
zzz
Zorro stepped out of the shadows of the kitchen and Victoria's exhaustion at the end of a long day disappeared. He held open his arms and she rushed into them, eager to feel loved and cherished if only for a few minutes. After taking comfort in listening to his calm, healthy heartbeat, she looked up into his eyes and eagerly accepted his kiss.
All too soon, he was pulling away. She grew concerned at the look on his face. "Zorro, is something wrong? Are they looking for you?"
He shook his head. "No, no one knows I'm in the pueblo tonight."
"So why are you here? What is the alcalde up to now?"
Zorro smiled a little, but still looked worried. And sad. "I shouldn't have come. I'm not here for the alcalde." She blushed prettily and he brought a hand up to caress her cheek. His eyes diverted from her face and he looked at his own hand. He quickly dropped it and started pulling away from her, as if he felt guilty for touching her. Victoria looked at his bowed head, now hidden by his hat. She picked up his hand and held it to her cheek again, closing the distance between them when he tried to step away.
"Zorro, what's wrong? I can tell something's bothering you. You can tell me. Maybe I can help!" When he still didn't say anything, she prodded him more. "I want to help you. Please, tell me what's wrong."
"Everything about this is wrong. Don't you see?" Zorro sighed. "I shouldn't even be here. I'm putting both of us in danger by coming to see you. And you shouldn't want to help me. I'm a criminal. An outlaw with a price on my head. If you help me, you're going to get in trouble and hang right next to me if we get caught. People will do a lot for 6000 pesos."
Victoria tried to cheer him up. "Don't talk like that. You're not going to get caught."
Diego chuckled at her optimism. "Ah, Querida. Do you realize the danger you're in because of me? The alcalde throws you in jail and tries to use you to get to me every chance he gets. I'm going to wind up getting you killed. You don't deserve that. I should—"
Victoria covered his mouth with her hands to keep him from finishing. "But we talked about this. You made a promise to me. Don't you remember?" When he just looked at her sadly, she felt on the verge of tears and stuttered over her words. "I… I thought we cared for each other. Of course I want to be with you. I don't care about the alcalde. I… I love you. Don't you …" she looked down at her hands, anxiously wringing the apron she still wore and trying to keep from crying.
"Ah, Victoria. I love you very much." He started to touch her cheek again and instead looked at his hand held a few inches away from her face. "You know, I hate wearing these gloves. I hate it all. I can't feel your skin when I stroke your cheek. I can't take you for a picnic at siesta. I can't sit with you in front of the fire at the end of a long day. I can't stand up with you in front of the church."
Victoria took his hand in hers and slowly removed his glove. She placed his hand back where it should be on her cheek, this time skin to skin. "You only have to take it off," she said quietly. "You can take the mask off, too. We can do all of that."
Diego watched her for a few seconds. "Have you thought about that much?" When she went to agree immediately, he interrupted her. "Have you really thought it through? You know I don't wear this mask every day." The smile on her face dimmed, and Diego forged ahead despite the fear of rejection. "You say you love Zorro, but I'm not Zorro. He's only a hero. If I took off the mask, I'd be an ordinary man with a price on his head. Would you still marry him?"
"Zorro, I told you I would. I don't care who you are."
"If we ever married, no matter what, the alcalde would suspect your husband was Zorro." He sighed again. "I was a fool to ever drag you in to this. I'm starting to think it will never be over."
Victoria held him for a moment, then brightened again. "We could have a fight. I could tell Zorro I was tired of waiting, tired of loving an outlaw. Maybe get mad at you for putting me in danger—though it's not true!" She put her own hand to his cheek when he cringed. "Everyone would hear. I can make everyone believe I don't love you anymore. I can be quite the actress! I know we could do it."
"But how long would you want to act?"
Victoria was confused. "We wouldn't have to wait long. You come in a few times, try to make up with me and I will throw you out. It will be over. Then the ordinary man can start visiting, and I fall in love with someone new. The alcalde will never suspect, and he'll stop using me as Zorro bait." She laughed, but it died quickly when he still didn't smile back at her. "We could make it convincing. It wouldn't take much."
"Zorro is still needed here. Would you be able to act like you don't care if your husband is surrounded by twenty soldiers? Whose name would you call out to save my life?" He hated to see the worry and fear creep into her eyes . "Or what about when I'm not wearing the mask and don't carry a sword? When I do nothing as myself so I can come back as Zorro so my family isn't hurt because I stand up to the Alcalde?"
Victoria's heart ached for him. "I never thought about that before." She wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head against his chest to give him comfort and to comfort herself. "But there has to be a way. Like you said, even now the Alcalde tries to use me against you. I'm already in danger. But now, I worry every night if you're safe or hurt and alone. I wonder if I'll ever see you again." She looked back up at him, still holding him tightly so he couldn't get away. "If we were married, you wouldn't be alone. I can learn to control my emotions better…I promise. I could stay away when you're fighting as Zorro… I wouldn't want to give away your secret. I hate that you carry this alone. Let me help.. Give me a chance. Give us a chance. Please? "
Zorro thought about what she said as he stroked her silky hair with his bare hand. Holding her, he allowed himself to imagine being able to be with her in the daytime. He could hold her and read by the river during siesta. He could hold her and not read by the river during siesta. And all night.
He had to think, and he couldn't do that with her so close. He squeezed her tight, then set her away from him. He didn't look at her as he donned the hated black glove again. He turned toward the door with barely a glance at her.
"Zorro!" He stopped, but didn't turn around. "Will you… will I see you again?"
Zorro turned around and his chest ached to see the tears in her eyes. "Yes, Querida. I'll see you tomorrow. I need to…I have to think." She sunk into a chair because her legs could not support her anymore.
zzz
Diego fidgeted with the ruffles on his shirt in front of the mirror the next morning. Did he look alright? Which suit did Victoria like best? Aside from black silk, that is… Maybe he could go to Santa Paula and get a black caballero suit made… No. No more putting it off and giving in to fear. He'd find out if Victoria could love Diego once and for all.
The tavern was quiet, as it was approaching siesta. There were only a few customers left, and Victoria was slicing vegetables behind the counter as he approached. "It's a quiet day for Los Angeles it seems." He said with a forced cheer to cover his nerves.
"Yes, it has been a peaceful day." She smiled at him briefly before focusing once again on her vegetables. He tried to tell himself her distraction and worried appearance was good…that it meant she was really thinking about what they talked about last night. She needed to understand the risks involved if he was going to go through with this.
"Is everything alright?" he prodded her.
Victoria looked up again and set down her knife. "Oh, yes, Don Diego. I didn't sleep well last night. But everything is fine. Can I get you a drink?"
"No, not now. I was going to ride out to check on something. I set up some experiments I need to take care of. I was wondering if you could pack me a lunch." Then he stood taller as if he'd only now had a brilliant idea and had not been planning this since last night. "As a matter of fact, you look like you need a break. You should come with me. I think you'd love the view."
"Where are you going? What experiments?" Victoria asked curiously
"Ah, no. I didn't tell you. I'm not sure if my experiment worked or not. I won't spoil the surprise. Come with me!" He smiled at her and prayed she'd accept his invitation. They'd go out of the pueblo, so in case she wanted to scream at him they wouldn't be heard.
Victoria glanced at the last customer from the lunch crowd as he got up from the table and ambled outside. "You know, Diego, I think I might take you up on that. Maybe a long ride will help me sort out my thoughts."
"I'm a good listener, too, if you need to talk something out."
"Oh, Diego, it'll be alright. I think I've already worked it out. It'll all be better tonight. Let me get us some lunch. I'll be right back."
zzz
The ride to the cove was quiet, each lost in their own thoughts. Diego tugged at the collar of his shirt for the thousandth time. He couldn't seem to breathe. He had to force himself not to slow the horses as they approached their destination.
"Oh, Diego, it's beautiful!" Victoria said as she stared over the cliffs at the waves gently breaking below. They were standing at the top of a cliff, and fifty feet below she saw a beautiful white beach and crystal clear water. Diego grabbed the picnic basket and found some stairs hidden away in some bushes. "We're going down there? Is it safe?"
Diego held out a hand to her. "The stairs are new. I built them, and I made sure they are quite safe. There's even a railing for you to hold. Just don't look down!" He smiled at her as he lead the way down the steep wooden stairs built into the cliff.
"You built this? How? When? This doesn't seem like you at all, Diego." Diego smiled as he reached the bottom of the stairs and held out his hand for her as she joined him on the grass.
"Maybe I have hidden talents," he replied. He led her over to a rocky outcropping, and spread a blanket on a large rock for her to sit. Victoria leaned back on her hands and turned her face towards the warmth of the sun. It was perfect here. The smell of the fresh surf, the clear water, the isolation… She looked at the empty spot next to her, then watched Diego pace back and forth.
"Diego, we came here to relax. You don't look relaxed at all."
Diego paused to look at her, then resumed pacing. "Victoria, do you remember a few years ago when my fiancé from Spain came to California?"
"Yes, I do." She smiled at her friend. "I remember you told her you were in love with someone else. Are you going to tell me who it is?" She leaned forward eagerly. Diego was a nice, handsome man. He deserved to be happy. And after talking to Zorro last night, it looked like things might be looking up for her, too. If Diego was troubled about something, she wanted to help him.
"Well, I was hoping you might help me with something. Do you remember what else I said?" Diego asked, barely pausing in his pacing.
"Oh…Diego! You still haven't told her? You said she was in love with another man, but surely after all this time you've told her." She walked up to him to stop his pacing. If he was this shy, he was never going to approach her! "Diego, you have to give her the chance. You're quite the catch, you don't have to be so shy all the time. Maybe she's not in love with this other man anymore."
"It's not that simple, Victoria." Diego ran his fingers through his hair, trying to figure out how he should start. It all seemed so simple last night. He took her arm and led her back to the rock and sat next to her.
"What's complicated if you love her? Diego, any woman would be happy to have you as a husband. Tell me who it is. I'll talk to her for you!"
"Victoria, the problem is…" He gave a sharp chuckle and muttered so quietly she almost didn't hear "Always wanting to help." He got up and stalked to the surf line, then immediately turned back around to sit next to her again. "Well, I am very much in love with her. I'm afraid she won't love me. I'm afraid I'll lose her friendship. I'm afraid she'll be angry with me."
Victoria's brows knit together. "Why would she be angry?"
"Well, I may have…hidden some things from her," he said quietly, still not looking at her.
"Diego! Shame on you. I can understand if you're afraid to tell her you love her, but you can't lie to her. Then she won't believe anything you say." She put her hands over his where he was wringing them together restlessly. He relaxed his hands and took one of hers and held it in both of his, which seemed to relax him. He appeared to examine it intently, and she suppressed shivers when he stroked his fingers over the back of her hand, turning it to stroke her palm as well. "If she loves you though, she'll forgive you. You must be honest with her."
"I did it to protect her. But I never imagined waiting this long…" He said to her hand, not looking at her or at the beautiful scenery.
"Protect her from what, Diego? You're one of the richest men in California. You can't be ashamed of your family. You're kind, your tenants say you're a wonderful landlord. You're smart and help people increase their crops. You're not a criminal." She stopped abruptly in her defense of him when she saw him flinch.
She pulled her hand from his and turned his face to look at her. "Diego, you're not a criminal. Tell me. I'm your friend…nothing you say will change that."
"Promise?" He asked weakly. He put his hand on hers where it rested on his cheek and looked up at her again.
"Yes, Diego." She squeezed his hand encouragingly. "Now stop all this. Tell me who it is and what the problem is. We'll fix it." Victoria didn't like seeing her friend so distressed. He always found the bright side in a situation. He always cheered her up. Now she could return the favor.
He looked back out over the water again. "The problem is she thinks she's in love with someone else, but really she's not."
"How can she think she's in love with someone else and you know she's not?" Victoria asked, confused. Something in the back of her mind was starting to make her agitated, though, and she shook her head to clear it.
"She's in love with a myth. A legend." Diego kept talking, slowly, clearly. He couldn't look at her, talking instead to the hand he still held. "I don't know if I should burden her with my secret. I don't know if I should spoil that and put her in danger. Risk her friendship. Risk her love." Victoria slowly started trying to pull her hand out of Diego's grasp, but he wouldn't let her go. "I always wanted to share this place with her, so I built stairs so I could bring her here one day."
Victoria interrupted him. "What experiments did you say you were doing down here?" she asked loudly, desperately.
"Victoria," He looked at her face, which was becoming more distressed by the second. He knelt in front of her, taking both of her hands even as she tried to pull away and started shaking her head in denial of anything he had to say. "Victoria, please…" He took a deep breath and dove in. "I am a master swordsman. I am an outlaw. There's a 6000 peso price on my head." She stopped pulling away from him and froze, wide eyes staring into his.
"I live in constant fear that my friends and family will be hurt to get to me." He continued even as he saw tears welling up in her eyes. "But I love you more than anything. I don't want to hide anymore. And I want to continue the discussion we started last night in your kitchen."
zzz
Author's Note 2:Apologies… I know it's not a nice place to end it… and it's only about half of what I've got. But I'm not sure if I like the direction I'm going in so I'm not posting it just yet.