Disclaimer: I don't own TDWT. It belongs to its rightful owners. I mean no disrespect to any countries. The songs in this episode have the music of an actual TDWT song with lyrics rewritten by me. Italics mean singing.
"Season three of Total Drama!" Chris said. "The world is going to be mine, sea to shining sea. Sadly, I have to share with 17 idiotic teens that will be traveling around the world for another million dollars."
The bus pulled up and the door opened.
"Let's see who we'll have this season," Chris season.
"Geoff, Duncan, Courtney, Bridgette, and DJ."
"Man, it feels so good to be back," DJ said.
"Lindsay, Heather, Harold, and Owen," Chris continued. Harold got out noticing a smell in his backpack.
"Uh, who put a fish in my backpack?" Harold asked.
Geoff and Duncan snickered while Bridgette glared at them.
"Trent, Gwen, LeShawna, and Izzy," Chris continued.
"And returning favorites, Cody and Noah."
"We also have two new contestants," Chris said.
"He is suave and brilliant, Alejandro."
Alejandro got off the bus and Izzy, Lindsay, and LeShawna started smiling.
"Also, she is a sugar addicted super fan, Sierra," Chris said.
"Oh my gosh, this is the best day ever," Sierra said in excitement. She then saw Cody. "Ooooh Cody, I've dreamt of this day only you weren't wearing a shirt."
A giant plane then rolled up.
"Now boarding," Chris said. "We're giving you a first class seat to all the action right here on Total Drama World Tour!"
"Why did you just sing?" Duncan asked.
Episode 1: (I'm Sorry) Her Majesty
"Singing?" Gwen asked. "We have to sing?"
"That sounds fun," Courtney said.
"It's easy for you to say," Noah said. "You like to sing."
"Forget it," Duncan said. "I don't sing and I'd like to keep it that way."
"Musical reality shows are huge," Chris said. "And the worse the singing, the higher the ratings, so there will be no vocal coaches, rehearsals, or warnings."
"Here is where you'll eat your meals, prepared by Chef," Chris said.
"I need to go to the bathroom," Harold said.
"Sure, the bathroom is right that way," Chris said.
Harold walked in and saw a camera.
"Aw, this is the confessional?" he said. "I wish it was like that makeup one."
"In here," Chris said. "Is where the losers will stay. Right here in the luxurious economy class."
Everyone saw how run down it was with leaks and patches.
"Where do we sleep?" LeShawna asked.
"You're looking at it," Chris replied.
They saw the wooden benches with straps above them.
"That's not comfortable," Cody said.
"No comfort for losers," Chris said.
They all then walked away and went into a luxurious room.
"In here," Chris said. "Is where the winners will stay, with comfortable recliner seats and delicious snacks."
"Now here is where a lady should stay," Alejandro said as he smiled at Lindsay.
"Where is a lady?" Lindsay asked. "Oh, you mean me." She blushed at him as Heather glared.
"I can see right through that guy," Heather said in the cockpit confessional. "Hey, this is a better place than that disgusting bathroom."
"Maybe for you," Chef said.
"What's this place?" DJ asked. "It looks so classy." There was a fireplace, a hot tub, and a flat-screen TV.
"This is my quarters," Chris said. "In other words: off limits."
"Oh, Chris, I love your limits," Sierra said.
"With Beth, gone, and Alejandro seeming to bet taking Lindsay, along with Harold and Bridgette being backstabbers," Heather said in the confessional. "I'm forced to be an ally with the new girl. This is going to suck."
"One more thing," Chris said. "I think y'all remember a little thing called the elimination room."
"If you don't get a barf bag with airline issued peanuts," Chris continued. "You will have to take the drop of shame."
"Well," Chris said. "I think that wraps off the tour, now prepare for takeoff."
"Cody Emmett Jameson Anderson, born on April 1st," Sierra said. "You're my very own April Fool." Owen and Noah exchanged looks. Just then, a bell rang.
"Whenever you hear that bell," Chris said. "That means it's time to sing so get to it."
"But what are we supposed to sing about?" Harold asked.
"If I told you, it wouldn't be a challenge would it," Chris said.
(Imagine the music to "Come Fly with Us)
Courtney:Up
Lindsay:Up
Sierra: Up
LeShawna:Up
Noah:Sing
Harold: Sing
DJ: Sing
Cody: Sing
Everyone minus Duncan and Gwen: We're flying and singing!
We're flying and we're singing!
Bridgette: Come fly with us!
Bridgette and Geoff: Come fly with us!
Owen: I wish were still on the bus
Heather: Come fly with us!
Heather and Lindsay: Come fly with us!
Alejandro: With you two, it's a must!
Duncan: Dude this is dumb you're singing on a plane.
Noah: What do you expect this show is frieking insane.
Gwen: Yeah but guys you're singing on TV.
Courtney: Haven't you always wanted to, it just can't be me!
Noah: Yes it can.
Everyone minus Duncan and Gwen: Come fly with us, come sing with us!
Duncan and Gwen: No!
Chris: Anyone want a copy of the rules because in order to avoid instant elimination-
DJ: All contestants must sing in this show!
Courtney: Duncan sing it, let's go!
Trent: Gwen, do it, don't go!
Gwen: I don't want to go. Come fly with us, come fly with us, come and fly with us!
Duncan: This sucks!
Everyone: Yeah!
The plane soon landed in England.
"Welcome everyone to London, England!" Chris said. "For your first challenge, you guys are going to have to find Big Ben. This will make out the teams."
"Do we get maps?" DJ asked.
"I think you know the answer to that," Chris said. "I suggest you guys get into groups to make it a little less likely to get lost."
Harold, Bridgette, and Geoff got into a group (much to Geoff's dismay).
Duncan, Courtney, Trent, and Gwen got into another group.
Noah, DJ, and Owen got into another group.
Izzy and LeShawna got into another group.
Sierra, Heather, Lindsay, and Cody all got into another group.
Alejandro went by himself.
"I could go with some girls," Alejandro said. "But if I don't get on the first team, then I might be on the losing team."
Everyone then started to find different ways to get to Big Ben.
Alejandro, however, knew where he was going and in about thirty minutes, he was the first to make it.
"Well, that was fast," Chris said. "Alejandro step on the Number 1."
Meanwhile, Harold, Geoff, and Bridgette were finding a way.
"Maybe if we ask a local we can find a way," Harold said.
"Nice plan," Bridgette said.
"Yeah, sure," Geoff said sarcastically.
They went up to this one guy.
"Excuse me," Bridgette said. "But where is the direction to Big Ben?"
The man spoke in a thick British accent but said that it was a mile to the left.
They then all went to left.
Meanwhile, Trent's group was still looking for a way to Big Ben.
They then saw a map that showed where Big Ben is.
"Looks like it's about a mile to the east," Gwen said.
"Don't worry you guys, I'll lead the way," Courtney said. "I am a CIT."
"Yeah, like that will work out so well in England," Trent said sarcastically.
Duncan rolled his eyes in frustration.
"If I have to be on a team with those two," he said in the confessional. "I hope I go home early."
Meanwhile, Noah's group was coming on to something.
"Judging by where we are," Noah said. "I think Big Ben is that way." He pointed north.
"Wow, Noah, that's brilliant," DJ said.
"Thank you DJ," Noah said.
The three then headed in that direction.
Meanwhile, LeShawna and Izzy were by Buckingham Palace.
"Izzy," LeShawna said. "We have to go."
"Look," Izzy said. "I'm a royal guard."
She stood silently and took one of the hats. LeShawna moaned.
Meanwhile, Heather's group was walking toward Big Ben.
"I have been to England before, I know where to go," Heather said.
"I was having the best time with Cody," Sierra said in the confessional.
"I'm having the worst day, this girl is nuts," Cody said in the confessional.
Meanwhile, Harold's group had finally made it to Big Ben.
"Welcome guys," Chris said. "Join Alejandro on the #1 mat."
Trent's group was then getting close.
Duncan and Gwen came up first and went to the first mat.
Courtney and Trent were about to join them but Chris stopped them.
"In honor of our third season, three teams!" Chris said.
"Duncan and Gwen are a part of Team 1 while you two will start off team two. And look there's a few more teammates."
They saw Noah's group come up.
"You guys will join Team #2," Chris said. The three then got up on the mat with Courtney and Trent.
Heather's group then came close to Big Ben.
"Lindsay, you join team 2 and the rest of you are on Team #3," Chris said.
"Yay, I get to be on your team!" Sierra said as she hugged Cody. Cody groaned.
Just then, Izzy and LeShawna were running away from four royal guards and made it to Big Ben.
"Izzy and LeShawna wrap up Team #3," Chris said. LeShawna grabbed the guard's hat and threw it back to the guards.
"Now, I'll give you guys three minutes to come up with a Team name," Chris said.
"Team Victory!" Harold, Bridgette, Geoff, Alejandro, Duncan, and Gwen all said together.
"Team Amazon!" Heather, Izzy, LeShawna, Cody, and Sierra said.
Noah, DJ, Owen, Courtney, Trent, and Lindsay were all still debating on what to call their team.
"Times up," Chris said. "Guess I'm gonna have to name you guys myself. How about Team Chris?" The team moaned.
"Okay, we now have our teams," Chris said. "Which team will win? Which teams will lose? Find out next time on Total Drama World Tour!"