Setting: The spare room. The wardrobe is center stage. Peter, Susan, Lucy, an Edmond come pouring out of the wardrobe. Peter is wearing a gold crown cocked so it's practically hanging off the side of his head, and what appears to be about fifteen pounds of bling around his neck. Susan is wearing nothing but a corset and a petticoat, torn above a garter on her thigh, and carrying several bottles of some sort of ale. Lucy is a fawn. Lastly, Edmond looks as though he were swimming in a pool of "Turkish Delight" (and probably smells like it as well).
Professor Kirk enters.
Professor: There you children are! It's been hours!...
(Pause)
Professor: ... What the hell were you motherfuckers doing in my wardrobe!?
The children look at eachother, trying to come up with something to say. Lucy comes to her hooves and clears her throat.
"You Can't Imagine"
LUCY
You can't imagine
How wonderful it was
You had to be there
To know how beautiful it was
SUSAN
Imagine springtime
Becoming summer
LUCY AND SUSAN
That's how it always was
In Narnia!
ALL CHILDREN
You can't imagine
How wonderful it was
You had to be there
To know how beautiful it was
Aslan approaches from Wardrobe.
ASLAN
You can't imagine
That wonderful glow
EVERYONE (epic conclusion)
You had to be there
in Narnia
To know!
Edmond takes another toke of Turkish Delight, and chokes a little on it.
Edmond: You know what I think, guys? What happens in the wardrobe...
Everyone: ... Stays in the wardrobe!
Everyone laughs as curtain draws to a close