WARNER BROS LOGO WITH BUGS BUNNY
FADE IN…
The Old West, 1883
Batman and Jonah Hex are riding horses through a Western desert.
"So who exactly are we ranglin' in, partner?" Hex asks.
"Two criminal cowboys from my time, Shame & the Brand." Batman says, "Shame likes to steal mobile vehicles, and the Brand leaves clues to his crimes by marking the scene with a cattle brand."
"Should be easy enough," Jonah says, "all we have to do is find a stolen carriage that's been branded, and we got the yellowbellied cowards caught, that is, if you want 'em alive."
"It may be different in your time, Hex," Batman says, "but in my time, justice is up to the courts. That reminds me—how did you get off of War World in the 21st Century?"
"Yer pal Rip Hunter came for me, told me it was important. I took 'im up on his offer." Hex says.
At the town bank…
"Alright, nobody give us trouble, y'hear?" Shame says, waving his gun.
"We just want yer money," the Brand says, "if y'all keep calm nobody's gonna git hurt."
"Wish we could say the same for you," Batman says, "but you'll be facing my hammers of justice!"
"Batman, yer a sissy who wears a cape!" Shame shouts.
Batman punches him.
"Shame on you, Shame!" Batman says.
Jonah Hex wrestles the Brand to the ground.
"Hey ugly, maybe we can make yer mug symmetrical-like." The Brand says.
Hex punches him.
"Sorry," Jonah says, "but I just shaved this mornin'."
"Good work, partner!" Batman says, shaking Hex's hand.
While they shake, Shame and the Brand make a run for it.
"They're getting away!" Batman shouts.
"Not on my watch!" Hex says, shooting at them.
"Hex, no!" Batman says, "don't shoot! We don't need to use guns!"
"Why don't ya quit yer jawin' an' git after 'em already?" Jonah yells.
They run over by a barn, when all of a sudden an unconscious Shame and Brand fly out from behind the barn.
"What in tarnation…?" Hex asks, bewildered.
"T'wasn't nothin'." a cowboy says, stepping out of the shadows.
"Glad to be of service to you," a Native American says, "My name is Sheriff Ohiyesha Smith, friends call me 'Pow-Wow' Smith. This is Bartholomew Alouysius Lash."
"Friends call me Bat Lash!" Lash says, shaking Batman's hand.
"While I admire the first name," Batman says, "this town isn't big enough for two bats."
OPENING TITLES
"The Merciless Mud Pack!"
Written by: TouchedbyaMunster
An alarm goes off at Gotham Jewelry store.
"Ha, ha, ha!" laugh two men in red and black masks, "No can stop the threat of Mr. X & Mr. X!"
"And I thought Dr. Double-X was bad," Batman says.
Detective John Jones gets out of a squad car and beats up the villains, along with Batman helping him.
Back at Police Headquarters…
Batman speaks with Commissioner Gordon.
"Thank you for bringing Mr. X's in, Batman," Gordon says.
"Sure an' that's the truth," Chief O'Hara says, "Do you know how confusin' it is having two criminals with the same name? "
"They're both criminal scum, Chief O'Hara," Batman says, "and as such they must face the hammers of justice!"
"Batman, this is our newest detective, John Jones." Commissioner Gordon says.
"Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Jones." Batman says, shaking his hand.
"Detective Jones has been working very closely with Harvey Bullock," Gordon says.
"Yeah, and I don't let him push me around, either." Bullock says, stepping into the office.
"Commissioner, I have reason to believe a rash of bizarre robberies have taken place in Gotham recently," Batman says.
"I know," Gordon says, "Our best men on the force are on it. A string of chemical thefts. So far, nobody's turned up a thing."
"Maybe I can," Batman says, "Can you give me an update on known supercriminals not currently in prison?"
"Of course, Batman," Gordon says, as he turns on the closed-circuit TV.
Pictures of five clay characters appear on the screen.
"The Clayfaces!" Batman says, "not just one, but all five of them; that mischievous mud pack!"
"Saints preserve us, Batman!" O'Hara exclaims, "You think they've joined forces?"
"I don't know, O'Hara," Batman says, "But if they have, this could mean disaster for Gotham City!"
"You can't fight them alone, Batman!" Gordon protests.
"I know," the Caped Crusader says, "that's why I'm going to enlist some help!"
John Jones walks out of the building with him.
"We'll stop these clay criminals." he says.
"I know, J'onn," Batman says, "but with all five of them on the loose, we need someone with special chemical abilities."
"Who do you have in mind?" J'onn asks, transforming back into his Martian form.
Batman goes to the base of the Outsiders—a homeless shelter they've converted into a longue and headquarters.
"Yo, Batman," Black Lightning says, "What's up?"
"I need the help of Metamorpho." Batman says.
"What?" Black Lightning says, "Just Morpho? What about me? What about the rest of us?"
"You can have your time to shine in the spotlight later, Jefferson. Right now, I need Metamorpho's unique abilities to stop a squadron of sinister shapeshifters." Batman says.
"Ok Bats," Metamorpho says, "let's go!"
Meanwhile, in an undisclosed warehouse, the Clayfaces are plotting…
"Here's what I'm thinking," Basil Karlo Clayface announces, "we combine our might to rob Gotham blind! Batman won't have a prayer!"
"Why don't we use our abilities to all go into other cities?" Matt Hagen Clayface suggests, "that way we'd get five times the loot!"
"He's got a point," Preston Payne Clayface says, "Karlo could take Gotham, Hagen could take Metropolis, I could take Star City, Claything could take Gateway City, and Fuller could go to Central City."
"You idiots!" Karlo yells, "this isn't about loot, this about revenge! Batman defeated just one of us, but wasn't ever faced with all five of us!"
"Alright Karlo," Hagen sighs reluctantly, "we're with you."
"No, maybe there's something to that idea after all," Karlo said, "I heard most of the JLA is off planet right now, so most of those cities won't have heroes to protect them. With each of us split up, Batman won't know which direction to turn!"
Up at the JLA watchtower…
"We'll need the instruments in the Watchtower to determine their next move," Batman says.
"That won't be difficult Batman," Martian Manhunter says, "I can do a mind sweep of the city to locate our quarry.
"No need, J'onn," Batman says, as a small alarm goes off, "The Gotham Gem Depository is being robbed!"
Meanwhile at the Gem Depository…
A thug walks out with a bag of jewels.
"Halt, you heinous hoarder!" Batman commands, "Put those jewels back or you'll be facing 10-20 years to life in Blackgate Prison!"
"I don't think so, Batman!" the thug says, as his fist transforms into a wall of solid brick!
He slams the Caped Crusader up against a wall.
The thug transforms into Clayface 1!
"Clayface, you sinister shapeshifter!" Batman says.
"You'll never stop me, Batman!" Karlo shouts.
"Then it's a good thing a brought help!" Batman says.
Metamorpho slugs him.
While Metamorpho is battling Karlo, Batman gets a call on his radio receiver.
"Batman," J'onn says, "I've just gotten word that the First National Bank of Star City is being robbed!"
"Green Arrow can handle it," Batman says.
"That's not all," Manhunter says, "The Metropolis Federal Gold Exchange, the Gateway chemical plant, and Central City chemical labs are all being robbed!"
"I'm sure Superman, Wonder Woman, and the Flash can handle crime in their own cities." Batman says.
"Superman and Wonder Woman are on a mission in deep space with the rest of the JLA." Manhunter says.
"Ok, J'onn, you handle the problem in Gateway, I'll head over to Metropolis." Batman says.
"What about Central City?" J'onn asks.
"I'll radio one of the Flashes and see if they can handle it." Batman says. "Metamorpho, you handle things here! I've got to stop a robbery in Metropolis!"
"Gotcha covered, Bats!" Metamorpho says, as he slugs Clayface I.
Batman heads over to Metropolis.
He spies a thief running out of the bank. A bat shadow looms over the thief.
"Since Superman's away," Batman says, "you're about to face my hammers of justice!"
"You want a hammer, Caped Crusader?" the thug asks, as his hand transforms into a giant mallet, "you can have mine!"
He transforms into Clayface II!
"Clayface II!" Batman exclaims, "What are you doing here?"
"I figured with Superman gone, no one could stop me from robbing Metropolis blind!" Hagen says.
"It's over, Hagen!" Batman shouts, "you and your clay companions will headed up the river for a long time!"
"Not on your life, Batman!" Clayface II yells, as he slugs him, and makes his escape.
Batman regains consciousness a few minutes later to find that his foe has eluded him.
"Gone!" Batman says. He signals his radio. "J'onn, how you holding up?"
"Well, I'm holding in there!" J'onn says.
"I'm not psychic," Batman says, "But I can guess you're fighting Clayface?"
"Clayface III, to be exact, Preston Paine," J'onn says, "How did you know?"
"Because I just fought Hagen," Batman says. "Metamorpho is battling Karlo is Gotham!"
"Didn't Karlo used to go by the name False Face?" J'onn asks.
"No, that's an idle rumor," Batman says. "False Face is currently locked away in Blackgate Penitentiary! Karlo made it seem like they were the same man once, but I saw through that phony façade."
"Unfortunately, Mr. Paine has eluded me for the moment," J'onn says, "I can use my telepathy to track him and—"
"No need," Batman says, "I have a better idea in mind. Two other Clayfaces are unaccounted for. Sandra Fuller and Dr. Peter Malley."
"They must be the ones attacking Star City and Central City!" J'onn says. "I'll see if I can get in touch with Green Arrow."
"Unfortunately, I just learned he's away with the JLA." Batman says, "Metamorpho, how are things going in Gotham?"
"Pretty good, Bats," Metamorpho responds over radio, "Karlo had the upper hand for a while, but I've got him contained!"
"Excellent work. Speedy should be able to handle the Clayface in Star City and I'm sure Kid Flash can handle Lady Clay in Central City!"
Meanwhile, in Star City…
An explosion occurs at the First National Bank.
"I know that's not you, GA!" Speedy shouts, "Give yourself up!"
"You're right, kid!" "Green Arrow" replies, "but I'm gonna have to pass! Speedy, you have failed this city!" He slams Speedy into a wall with a giant clay fist and transforms back into Claything.
"Once you're out of the way, nobody'll be able to stop me!" Claything continues.
"I wouldn't be so sure about that!" a triumphant voice calls. J'onn materializes and uppercuts Claything.
"You!" Claything exclaims, "I thought the others were keeping you busy!"
"Not as busy as you hoped, you malevolent malformation!" Batman shouts.
"Batman, Speedy, Metamorpho, and Martian Manhunter?!" Claything exclaims, "I'm gettin' outta here!"
"That's it, run, you clay coward!" Speedy shouts.
"He'll be back!" Batman says, "In the meantime, it's time we stop the final member of the team: Lady Clay!"
"But isn't Kid Flash handling her in Central City?" Metamorpho asks.
"He should be," Batman says, "but given how dangerous Sandra Fuller's warped mind in is combination with her powers, Wally may have run into something deeper than he can handle."
Meanwhile, in Central City…
Wally West gets ready for his date with Linda Park. He's supposed to meet her at the Big Belly Burger at 7:00. He glances at the digital clock on his nightstand. It's 6:59. He speeds over in blur.
"Hey Linda!" he exclaims.
"Right on time!" Linda says.
"So you wanna grab some burgers and then go see a movie or something?" Wally asks.
"Actually, I was thinking of stopping by the bank first. I have a withdrawal I have to make." Linda says.
"But the bank closed an hour ago!" Wally says.
"Since when has that ever stopped me?" she says, as a giant clay fist knocks Barry against the wall before he has a chance to react.
"Clayface!" he mutters.
Suddenly, Kid Flash speeds in front of Linda/Lady Clay.
"It's over, Clayface!" Kid Flash shouts, "And what'd you do with the real Linda Park?"
"She's fine, kid! And I think you have me confused with someone else; the name's Lady Clay!"
She hurls clay spikes at Kid Flash but he dodges them and creates a whirlwind that sends Lady Clay tumbling backward.
"It's over, Lady Clay!" Kid Flash shouts.
"Oh yeah?" she scoffs, "You and what army?"
"This army!" Batman says, as he flies in via Batplane with Martian Manhunter, Metamorpho, and Speedy."
"Well, luckily, I have an army too. Clayfaces, attack!"
"I give the orders around here, Sandy!" Karlo shouts, "Mud Pack, attack!"
"Karlo, how'd you escape?" Metamorho asks, "I thought I defeated you!"
"You thought wrong, kid!" Karlo snaps, "The glass prison you trapped me in shattered soon after you left and I was able to reform!"
"It's too bad you won't reform from your wicked ways, Karlo!" Batman shouts, "but now it's time for your just desserts!"
"You really think you can beat all of us combined, Batman?" Karlo asks. "Mud Pack, alpha formation!"
The rest of the Clayfaces merge with Karlo creating a gigantic Clayface that towers over the city.
"I think I can," Batman says. "Black Lightning, now!" Black Lightning comes out of the batplane and zaps the giant Clayface. They are stunning for a moment, but keep going.
"THAT CAN'T HURT US ANYMORE, BATS!" they shout, "WE ARE TOO POWERFUL NOW!"
"Maybe, maybe not!" Batman shouts, "On my signal, Speedy, Kid Flash, Lightning, Metamorpho, J'onn, hit them with everything you've got! 3…2…1…NOW!"
J'onn zaps them with his laser vision while Lightning hurls electricity at them. Speedy shoots stun arrows at them and Morpho hurls fire and acid at them. "J'onn now!" Batman shouts.
J'onn telepathically reaches out to the minds of each Clayface, causing the giant creature to get a mental shock that breaks their concentration and they break apart. Black Lightning zaps them all out of commission.
"Thanks for finally giving me my due, Bats!" Black Lightning says.
"You earned it, Jefferson.
Suddenly, Wildcat drives up with Katana and the rest of the Outsiders.
"You kids better get your butts back to trainin'!" he says, "You always have to be prepared for the next battle.
"Coming, Coach Wildcat!" Black Lightning and Metamorpho reply simultaneously.
"On that note," Wally says, "I believe I have a date with the real Linda Park!"
THE END